Do you ever just sit there and ask yourself, 'What am I doing with my life? What is the point to all this bullshit? Who am I put here on this earth to please anyway?' Sitting here in this stuffy, overheated classroom, I found myself wondering these things.
"Mr. Jones!" A shrill voice snapped at me.
I turn my head towards my English teacher.
"Yeah?" I answered nonchalantly.
"What is it outside that you find so interesting?" She asked with a nasty scowl on her face.
I must have been spacing out while looking out the window again. I have to stop doing that.
"…nothing." I answered, looking back at the board. The teacher scoffed, probably expecting an apology. I didn't give her one though, so she proceeded to talk about the lesson and I pretended to actually give a shit.
I guess this is the part where I introduce myself. Let's see… My name is Alfred F. Jones. I'll leave it to your imagination what that "F" stands for. I am a freshman who goes to a private school. I don't go to a private school because I'm smart. I go because my parents wanted me to so badly that they spent a fortune on it. They want me to be something really successful, like a doctor or a scientist or a politician. I already know I'm going to be none of those things. More likely, I'll continue to fail this school until they kick me out and I'll be forced to get a really lame job instead. After that, my parents will probably disown me or something for being such a disappointment. Story of my life.
"Remember that it's due on Thursday!" The teacher announced to the class, pulling me from my thoughts.
…Wait, what was due on Thursday? Oh well, I'll just get it from a friend…I'm tired as hell.
I flinched as I heard the bell ring loudly. I quickly packed up all my things and headed to the dorms. If there was anything that could keep a person's spirit down, it was being away from home this long, stuck in this terrible school. However, I could always look forward to returning to my dorm at the end of the day and having it all to myself.
I remember how at the beginning of the year, a few weeks ago, I had to share with a senior named Gilbert. I'm pretty sure he got suspended for bringing drugs to school or something though. I didn't know when he'd be back, but in the meantime I was happy. The first few days I knew him, I got the impression that he was sort of a dick anyway.
When I got to the dorms, I found my room and unlocked it sluggishly. Once inside, I kicked off my converse, unzipped my jacket, flopped onto my bed and slept without even pulling the covers over myself. Who cared if it was 4:00 PM? I needed my sleep.
Why were there so many dying people? Why were they all dying in different ways? There were some sitting helplessly without limbs and some with terrible wounds. Everyone was emaciated, and pale and sickly. They were sweating and sobbing and just…
A mother sat, shoved closely to the dirt wall and held her baby, weeping. Rusty lanterns hung from the unstable ceiling, offering dim light. Would it cave in soon? It looked like it with all the dust and dirt falling from it, bit by bit.
I walked further through the tunnel, scrunching up my nose to the foul scent of death and rotten flesh. Moaning noises of agony filled the area. Who was this young boy sitting in a mine cart? He had some of the greenest eyes I'd ever seen, but they looked so sad and broken and empty. Was that a light at the end? Yes, there was a blue light to the end of the tunnel. A cold breeze seeped through the large space and icicles hung from it. There was an icy cavern ahead. I headed towards it.
Is the boy talking to me? "Don't go out there!" Sounded faded and already lost. It was too late. I walked out, and behind me, the tunnel full of sickly people blew into smithereens. The sounds of panic filled my ears, but left just as soon as they came. The people could not hurt. They could not cry. Not anymore…
I woke up in cold sweat, with a disgusting feeling inside me. God, how long did I sleep? I looked towards my digital clock, but I couldn't make out the blurry, red numbers. I narrowed my eyes to focus on them, but only ended up hurting myself. My eyesight really is terrible.
Instead, I reached into my jeans and pulled out my phone, checking the time. It was 9:30… I've slept for a whole five hours. I've basically fucked up my whole sleep schedule, not to mention I didn't do my homework. Three weeks into school and I'm already completely failing.
Deciding that I didn't like the idea of lying there in my gross, sweaty clothes any longer, I rolled off of my bed and onto the floor and pulled myself up shakily. God, I had that horrible nap taste in my mouth. I also had that weird feeling in my face. I don't even know how to explain it, other than my mouth felt literally sore both inside and out.
Making my way to the bathroom, I reached into the shower and pulled the handle to turn it on. I made sure the water wasn't too warm, or I might fall asleep while bathing. It may sound ridiculous, but it's happened to me before. I've always had so much energy, but lately I just haven't been feeling it. I've been so tired and I don't know why.
I put my hand under the shower head and turned the handle to get just the right temperature. After testing it, I stripped out of my dirty clothes and stepped in slowly, letting the cool water pour over my face. God that felt nice…I sighed and ran my fingers through my dark blonde hair, letting my mind wander in the process.
Why did I feel so empty and sad when I woke up? Did I have a dream? I dug through my mind, trying to recover anything, but it was very foggy. I only remembered a few things. I remembered sick people, and a tunnel and a blue light. Most of all though, I remembered green eyes. I felt like it should mean something, but I figured it was just my subconscious deciding to mess with me.
Noticing the water becoming cold, I sighed and pulled the handle, shutting it off. I stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel. I took a very long time to dry myself off, because I just couldn't stop thinking. The dream became clearer by the minute. Green eyes…green eyes… Had I seen those before? Or maybe was I going to see them? Maybe it was just one of those dreams where you remember something that never even happened. Yeah…that had to be it.
After drying off, I tossed the towel onto the counter and stumbled out of the bathroom without getting dressed. I fell back onto my bed, pulling the covers over myself and stared at the blank ceiling. I knew I wasn't going to be able to go back to sleep, but I tried anyway. Those green eyes…where were they from?