Disclaimer:…. I obviously do not own Ninja Turtles. Peter Lair and Kevin Eastman do.


"Dudes," Mikey said as he came up to his bro's, rubbing his head with one hand because he, like them, didn't actually remembered the events that transpired under the fanon influence "I just had the weirdest dream – the Shredder was a fourteen-year-old girl singing about coconuts."

"That was me, you idiot." Neko told him "And you know you liked it." Neko was back to her normal appearance – her very flawed appearance with the pimples, boyish clothes, unnaturally gruff (for a girl) voice and short hair that looked as though it had never been brushed and as if rats nested in it.

"Like, what happened?" Mikey asked – his own voice was no where near as high-pitched or whiny like it was earlier.

"It's a very long story," Eve said, putting a hand on her fellow writers shoulder in a rather strange attempt to symbolize their friendship. If she was going to keep it there, it would be appropriate for her to say 'no homo'. "So let me tell you the story off-screen."


"I can't believe I acted like that." All the turtles said in unison; since the universe was restored Splinter was again alive.

"I am sorry about all that has happened." Master Splinter told Neko, he had heard about his own behavior and was appalled.

"I'm sorry I became a Mary Sue." Neko said, then turned to Mikey "Mikey, I'm sorry I made you suck on pickle….. And that I've tortured you in my fanfics."

"You've what?" Mikey asked.

"Uh, nothing." Neko quickly excused.

"This crackfic is over, let's get back home Neko." Eve said to the other writer.

"…How do we get home?" Neko asked confused; how she got into the world, she wasn't quite sure.

"We write ourselves out of this universe." Eve said, as if it was the wisest thesis ever to have been thought of.

"Oookaaayyy…." Neko drew out, she wondered if it was too late to drop out of the fanficiton world to avoid crazy authors "Can I say a few words to the turtles?"

"I don't see why not."

Neko turned to the turtles, first off was Leonardo "You need to get a life." She scoffed, then turned to Raph. "You need to learn proper grammer." Then to Mikey. "You….. You just suck in fanfiction." And lastly to Donnie "And you need to stop being useless!"

Her rant seemed to not effect them, so to make the venom sink in, she added "Also I un-friended you all on Facebook."

The turtles gasped in horror that she could have done such a thing.

And they all lived happ(crap)illy ever after!

...For about three days; the turtles decided to use a fourth-wall breaking computer Donatello invinted to study this 'Fanfiction' and upon the discovery of their fanon selves, and turtlecest in particular, they went on a full on ninja rage-quit and terrorized all of fanfiction and deviant art. They left behind a a path of mass destruction and genocide.

The moral of this story is; if you decide to f*ck with someones character, make sure you have a bomb-proof cellar to hide in.


This story was really fun! Although, I almost feel kind of bad that the one story I made that got a lot of attention was the one that I didn't really care about.

Oh and shout out to Second Daughter of Eve, you have been a good sport and I will see you in court.

Untill the next fic,

KGD, or 'Neko' as dubbed in the fic