Okay so while I was writing for my BDAWN fanfiction and my HetaOni fanfiction I wanted to do something HetaOni related that was really... strange. So I decided to write this one-shot. It's a Reader-Insert so you get to put your name in here. So I hope you enjoy because I REALLY have no idea what I was thinking of when this came to my head, all I know is I was playing the new English Demo and BAM! I got a crack fic idea. HetaOni is based off of the Japanese Horror game Ao Oni where the objective is to escape with everyone ALIVE.

Summary: When you go to a haunted mansion with Italy, Germany, Japan and Prussia you encounter and monster that is probably not what you expected...

Rated: T

Warnings: Crack fic, Reader-Insert, Slight JapanxReader, A few WTF moments

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN Hetalia: Axis Powers, Hidekaz Himaruya-sensei DOES. I ALSO DO NOT OWN HETAONI OR AO ONI. (If I did... well then you don't wanna know.)

You should've known better than to enter that mansion with the guys, you should've told them 'no', made them listen.

Once that shattering sound came from the kitchen you knew something was wrong.

You should've known better than to let Japan go alone, you should've told them 'Let's go together', made them agree.

But you didn't and the moment he disappeared into the kitchen you felt such a strange feeling. You looked over at Prussia, Italy and Germany who all looked at least a little uneasy then Prussia said, "Hey [Name] are you okay?" "A-ah... yeah. I just feel like something weird-" you started before a door from next to the stairs opened to reveal a GIANT, nude, rotten scone colored monster that distantly looked like America's alien friend Tony. "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?" you shouted as Germany and the others screamed, Prussia yelling and swearing like a fool. Within seconds it charged and you all darted in different directions, Germany and Prussia charged up stairs and you ran in the direction Japan had gone, Italy seemed to have taken off to some unknown place since he was nowhere to be seen and the monster seemed to go in one direction you guessed to be the one Italy had taken. You were scared but you kept running and got to the kitchen where Japan was checking out a broken plate.

He looked up at you, stood and said, "[Name]-san? What are you doing here? Where are the others?" But he didn't get through his second question before you were clung to his torso shaking and nearly crying. "[N-N-N-N-N-N-Name]-san what are you...? Wh-what happened?" he said, his body stiff and his voice shaking from the immense personal contact. "S-sorry... b-but you h-have to hurry! Th-this monster-" you started before he shook his head and sighed in disbelief, "Did Prussia put you up to this? You're doing a good job at acting like-" Your turn to cut him off, it was frustating that he wasn't believing you... damn. Over and over you tried to explain to him but he just wouldn't give, he was too set in believing that this was some kind of prank. Although if it was a prank put together than she was fooled too and if that person was here than they were a VERY good actor since that was so very belivable.

Now you were just getting pissed, it wasn't funny, you were literally SCARED and invading Japan's personal space because you were scared! Although this wasn't the first time you'd invaded his space, you accidently walked in on him changing while running from someone and ran right into him, knocking him over and landing on him in a very... er... suggestive position while he was only wearing his uniform pants that were supposed to be removed to change for bed. And there were plenty of times where you just attacked him because his reactions were too priceless to resist, but he'd never get used to it so the amusement never ceased. With those funny thoughts in mind you gradually calmed and released the shaken Japanese man, apologizing. You and him scouted and room again and when you got to where the front door was was when you realized that the front door was locked, the windows were barred too, the eerie feeling hadn't left either.

"Do you want to split you to look for them? It would be much faster." he suggested, you nodded although feeling unsettled again as he went off down the hall, you went to the room that thing had come from. It was a Japanese-style dojo, there was a door to the side that you checked and it was locked, you took a look around the dojo and found nothing. So you decided to go and find Japan when you remembered that Prussia and Germany took off to the upstairs, so you left and went in the direction Japan had taken. There was two doors at the end of the hall, the air was thicker here and you were unsure of what was going on. You started walking up the hall, maybe Japan was in one of those rooms, at least you hoped that thing wasn't there instead. From the door directly in from of you there was a noise and the door creeped open to reveal the monster, your eyes widened and you slowly backed away. Where was Japan? Was he okay? Or was this really some prank and he was in on it...? That could be it. Yeah.

"H-hey this isn't funny! It's cruel!"

He stepped closer and you stepped back.

"I-I mean it, the gig's up guys. Cut it out."

Step. Step. Step.

"Quit it I said d-damnit!"

DokiDoki. DokiDoki.

"Y-you're really scaring me!"

"YoU WilL NoT EscApe..."

"HOLY MOTHER OF PASTA YOUR VOICE IS TOO FREAKING CREEPY!"

It lunged at you and you took out you [Weapon] and attacked it as well. You knew it wasn't a game anymore, they wouldn't attack you like that. It jumped back and its eyes glowed a grey-ish color as you prepped yourself to run.

"StOp." it said, this voice would definietly be in your nightmares.

"Wh-what?"

That was when things started to get... really, REALLY weird. The lights dimmed a little and the monster took some strange pose... then music started and it started swinging its 'hips' and dancing very nicely. When it finished you clapped and it said, "My NaME iS STevE." "And mine's [Name]... So what's the deal here?"

Then it cleared its throat and started talking in a sopisticated way...

"Well you see I'm supposed to scare whoever comes to this mansion. The pay's good and I think I really pull it off."

"Uh... well you sure scared me."

"I can tell! My pay this week will be good, but only if I continue to scare and attack all of you."

"That's not very nice."

"[Name] I, like the rest of the world's population, need money and food to survive. I just can't go to the store, the owner does but only if I earn the pay. So if you could... keep this our secret?"

"...How long?"

"Until you all figure out how to get out. Some hints were left all around, you're smart people so you can figure it out."

You sighed, this was just mental. "F-fine... but what's in it for me?"

"Well if you like someone you might get closer to them? Or you could talk to my boss."

"I guess...Well now what?"

"You run away scared."

"Got it!" Then you screamed and ran off. ...That was the definition of 'WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED?'

So that's it, hope you enjoyed the crack ^^ be sure to read my other fanfictions, review and have a great day~