Don't kill me, James Patterson, I swear I never owned Maximum Ride! Oh, god, not the lawyers! The stench….Too…Much…Cologne.

This wasn't happening.

This wasn't happening. It's just all some big, twisted dream that doesn't make any sense. You get em' all the time, Nudge. Calm your pants. Especially that one where Max is dressed as cupid and is trying to take over the world, one cantaloupe at a time. Or that one where Ella bakes a giant chocolate chip cookie and proceeds to let it eat Iggy. And- this is not happening.

I for a fact know that this is literally impossible. Under no circumstances should this have happened. He was supposed to date Ella. That's what all the fans say is going to happen in the next book and- what am I saying, I lived the books.

There's no way Iggy himself is standing in front of me, head bowed to ground. There's also no way an expertly drawn –surprisingly- Valentine's Day card is sitting in his pale hand. And Jesus knows there is no way in all things on the mutant earth that his arm is shoved in my direction.

We're all alone in my room, but I still glance behind me to see if I'm blocking his view of Ella Martinez. Nope, just us. I gingerly take the card and look at it with an expression that must have been considered full of disdain, and lowered my heartbeat. This is what lead to his next statement.

"If you don't like it I can,um,well,maybe-" I didn't let him finish his sentence before I g-snatched his neck and forced his warm lips upon mine.

"And you say I talk too much." I smiled lightly and proceeded to push him out of my door. "Don't hurt yourself, Battie Boy."

This sucks so hard. Right now I'm thinking of making a story for each of the little sections in the first chapter. What do you think? Special shout-out to UrWrstNitemare and LifIsTooShortEatIceCream for reviewing. Love your usernames!