This first three chapters belong to Ryoko101. Please see my profile for more details.

Naruto© belongs to Masashi Kishimoto. No infringement of copyright is intended.

Wha-what are you doing here?

...

Well this is awkward..

Naruto, Sasuke, Shikamaru and Neji lay in a heap on the ground at the feet of a very confused Ino.

This isn't the best method for a stealth intel retreval operation, if anyone was wondering...

The girls stared bewildered at the pile of men that had just landed in the room. It was quite coincidental, as the fore mentioned men were the topic of their heated discussion.

Sakura blinked at the disgruntled Uchiha, who was rubbing his head in pain from where Naruto landed on it. Sasuke was acting really strange lately, with the being nice and the stuttering and this whole situation just added to Sakura's suspicions...

"What if he does…like…me? Maybe Ino's right..."

"That would be a first..."

Inner Sakura was right, Ino was not known for her keen insight into the mind of a teenage boy. Sakura quickly erased the thought from her mind. This was Sasuke Uchiha she was talking about. The man had fewer emotions than a wet sock.

She returned her attention back to Ino and the interrogation of the pile of boys.

"So? I'm waiting for an explanation. What are you guys doing outside our door exactly?" Ino asked, hands on her hips with a sleek eyebrow raised. Her foot began tapping in irritation…that was always a bad sign.

When Ino's foot gets tapping, you better start running.

The boys, who were still on the floor, exchanged nervous glances. Not good. Very not good.

"Aha...well you see…" started Naruto until Ino cut him off.

"Were you guys eavesdropping on our private conversation?" the slightly hysterical blonde girl screeched.

"No No No No No!" Naruto denied, shaking his head furiously. If the girls found out that they had actually been eavesdropping on them, the boys would be cooked. They'd be skewered, them marinated then sizzled over an open flame. And the EATEN!

"Well then. What were you doing?" Ino asked again, a frown evident on her glossed lips.

"Well…um… you see..." Naruto began nervously. The other three boys had picked themselves off the floor, but poor Naruto was just too scared of what Ino or the other girls would do to him if they found out what he and the other guys were up to. Naruto was never good under pressure.

Shikamaru glanced down at the blubbering blonde buffoon still on the floor, desperately trying to come up with an excuse. He knew that if they left it up to Naruto to cover their tracks, the girls would definitely eat them for lunch.

So it was up to him. The live of the boys rested in his hands.

"We were just wondering if you girls wanted to join us to a trip to the mall…or something..." Shikamaru slipped into the conversation.

"YES!" exclaimed Naruto leaping into the air and wrapping his arm around the Nara boys shoulder, "That is exactly what we were doing outside your door! Right Shika!"

"Get your arm off me."

"Yes sir."

Ino's frown immediately disappeared from her face and was replaced with a dazzling grin. "The mall? As in… SHOPPING!" she began clapping her hands together in glee and bouncing up and down. "Oh yes yes yes yes YES!"

Sasuke and Neji exchanged glances. That Shikamaru was a sly one. What better topic to distract Ino than her favorite hobby.

"Hang on; we'll need Itachi or Kiku to come with us, remember?" came Tenten's voice of reason.

Sasuke's eye's narrowed at the mention of his brother's name. Anything involving Itachi would not be good. His older brother made a game of tormenting the younger Uchiha, and with Sasuke's new found feelings for a certain pink-haired girl, if Itachi were to find out…

Sasuke'd rather not think about what his brother would do to humiliate him. It was decided, there was no way that Itachi could find out about Sasuke's affection towards Sakura.

Tenten turned to Sakura "Where are those two anyway?"

"I think I saw Kiku go outside into the backyard. Itachi's probably with her, those two are never far apart."

The girls shared a knowing glance at one another that the boys missed.

Ino clapped hands together in an authoritative manner. "Alrighty, you boys go round up Itachi and Kiku, and we'll get dressed. We'll meet you downstairs in five minutes!" and with that, Ino shooed the four slightly alarmed boys out of her room.

As the door slammed shut behind them the boys turned to each other.

"You know…it'll probably take them half an hour to get ready…" deadpanned Neji and the three remaining men nodded their heads meekly.

"Quick thinking back their Shikamaru," piped up Naruto as they headed down the stairs, "I can't believe they actually fell for that!"

"You didn't actually fall for that, did you Ino?"

"Of course not Tennie my dear!" chirped Ino as she rummaged through her drawers, searching for a cute top to match her shorts. "Those four are obviously up to something, but it wasn't like they were just going to tell us what they were doing." She pulled out a lime green toped and held it in front of her chest. "Do you think this goes with my shorts?"

"I like your yellow shirt better with them." answered Sakura who began poking through Ino's closet for some clothes she could borrow…or possibly steal, "What do you suppose they were actually doing then?"

Ino was back in her drawer searching for her yellow top "Well isn't it obvious, they were spying on us. Duh."

"Why would they be doing that?" whispered Hinata who hadn't moved from her place on Ino's bed. When Naruto had walking in…or rather fell in..to Ino's room it had rendered poor Hinata frozen.

Ino pulled out the top she was looking for and yanked it over her head. "I don't know, probably had something to do with Sasuke's raging crush on Sakura over here." She walked over to the full length mirror and sent her pink headed friend a smug grin, which Sakura returned with a disapproving frown and glare.

"No one has a raging crush on anyone pig. Well… except maybe Hinata's crush on Naruto."

Hinata whimpered from her place on the bed.

"Don't worry Hina-chan" Sakura said reassuringly to her timid friend, "I bet he feels the same way."

"And we're going to find out! Along with if Sasuke really does have a crush on Sakura." Ino said, smoothing out the wrinkles in her shirt.

Before Sakura could protest she was cut off by Tenten. "Come on Sak, it couldn't hurt to do a little snooping. What better way to activate plan notice-me-you-stupid-asexual-male than with some good old fashioned snooping.

It was true; the girls had been discussing how to gain the attention of their seemingly androgynous counterparts before the said males, not so gracefully, crashed into the room.

"What's the plan here Ino?" asked Tenten.

The conniving blonde turned back from the mirror and faced her companions with a Cheshire grin on her face.

"Divide and conquer, ladies."

The boys ventured outside to find Itachi and Kiku in a rater…intimate position.

The two were sitting on one of the benches, with their lips locked and arms tangled around each other, small moans escaping from the females…occupied mouth. Not particularly a sight any of the boys would have preferred to have observed. The couple was oblivious to their new visitors, until Naruto spoke up.

"Eeww! Big teme, stop eating Kiku-san's face!" interrupted Naruto, a tone of disgust evident in his voice.

The couple abruptly broke apart, a furious spreading on both their faces, showing their embarrassment for getting caught. Itachi cleared his throat and tried to regain composure. "Oh...Hey guy…we didn't see you there…"

"Yeah…you seemed kind of busy." Neji put in sarcastically.

Itachi and Kiku were looking everywhere but at each other. They were just beginning to enjoy themselves. Why did those guys have to barge in and interrupt them? 'This is so not fair' thought Kiku.

Sasuke's right eye was twitching. He really did not need to see that. Though Itachi found it sadistically hilarious to torment his younger brother, Sasuke still saw him as an aloof yet sophisticated role model. Not some hormone crazed teenage boy. This completely shattered Sasuke's entire impression of his older brother, and would scar the boy for the rest of his life.

Although… if Itachi was distracted with his…activities with Kiku, then maybe he wouldn't wise up to Sasuke's feelings about Sakura.

Oh yes, this could work out nicely.

"What is it that you guys wanted?" Itachi tried again to recover and control the situation, although the blush hadn't fully decapitated from his face.

"We need you two to come with us and the girls to the mall." explained Shikamaru.

"But if you two are too busy…" Naruto added with a sly grin on his face. He wriggled his eyebrows suggestively at Kiku.

"Do that again Uzumaki and I'll rip those furry little caterpillars you call eyebrows right off your face." Kiku growled.

Naruto gulped and cowered behind Neji. That lady could be scary.

Itachi raised an eyebrow. "The mall? What, did this place get too boring for you in less than a day?"

"Nah the girls just wanted to go." Naruto piped in, still behind Neji.

"And you guys decided to go with them, why?" Itachi asked. Something was definitely up with these four.

'Shit. He's on to us.' Sasuke would never here the end of this if his brother was to find out.

"We need food." Sasuke spat out.

"The fridge and pantry was stocked up before you got here. There should be plenty of food" countered Itachi

"Naruto was hungry." came Sasuke's reply.

"Ah…yeah that makes sense…" not even Itachi could argue with Naruto's appetite.

Itachi turned to Kiku, 'What do you say?" he asked.

"A shopping spree could be fun." She hopped up and walked to the door, "you guys get the car and we'll meet you there in five minutes." And with that she bounded off to find the other girls.

Itachi sighed. "Knowing them, it'll probably take them half an hour…"

"That's what Neji said!" said Naruto, leaping out from behind the Hyuga male.

"Yeah, yeah…come on let's go..." Itachi began leading the boy back inside, he turned around "And guys, next time... please for the love of god…knock."