Apogee & Perigee

The extreme points of two objects' orbit around each other.

Robert and Cora have gone through a great deal together, vacillating between wedded bliss and the polar extreme of near adultery. How do they work their way back to stasis? Is it even possible? Rated T for mature themes, and SS for Robert's Stark Stupidity with that maid.

How the fight began mattered little. A snide remark from Robert about her American heritage, a response of stony silence from her, perhaps a biting retort that was just a little too accurate for everyone's comfort. The inception of the fight was of little consequence; all that mattered was that they stood several feet away, anger racing between them. Many words were said that could not be taken back and many hurts aired that couldn't be erased.

That maid, Cora had called Jane, and all of Robert's misdeeds lay exposed in the pale shame of his features. She knew, oh God how she knew. It was bad enough that he entertained the notion of being unfaithful to her, but it wasn't even the loss of his body that wounded her. It was the loss of his heart. To know he had given a piece of that which she'd believed belonged solely to her was the deepest betrayal. Given to a maid and sent away. What was left of him once that maid had moved on (with her son; Cora was not foolish enough to discount the importance of a son) was just a little sadder, a little more distant, and rife with guilt but no real desire for reconciliation.

He had settled for Cora, as he had in the beginning, and she was once again hopelessly in love with a man who saw her as a duty and a means to an end.

The gauntlet now lay between them and when she'd cried out "Why, Robert, why?", he took two long strides and was close before her in an instant.

Her back hit the wall with a crack. Robert's body, softer with age but no less imposing, pressed her into the wood paneling with a vicious intensity. She didn't fear him, not even in the darkest moments of their marriage, but his ice blue eyes were lasering straight into her, and her jealous heart split under his stare.

His hands gripped her arms above the elbow pinching almost painfully. His face, the one she knew every corner of, hovered close. His lips were twisted in pain, shame and desire.

"Want me." He husked and Cora couldn't tell if it was a plea, a question or a command. "Want me!"

She was unprepared for the assault on her neck, his lips barely brushing before teeth bit into her pulse. Her blood, already simmering from their fight, set to a roiling boil. His palm moved from arm to breast, grasping painfully before following a path to her hip and bunching in the silk of her skirts.

"All I ever wanted," He rasped into her neck, his words reverberating through every cell in her body. "Was for you to want me."

She felt as though his hands were everywhere, one pinning her arm to her side, the other rooting through her skirts to press between her thighs, his thumb stroking over her roughly. Pleasure spiked through her and her back arched. She was helpless in his grasp, needing to touch him but held firm between the firmness of his body and the unyielding wall.

It had been years since she felt this kind of wanton passion from her husband, since before the missc...the war. He had walked on eggshells around her for months, not daring to touch her. And then, when she realized she had been summarily dismissed from her duties as concubine, she began to search for another purpose at Downton. He had seemed so bitter about her pursuit for worth, so angry about his perceived in-consequence to the war effort, and yet he held himself more distant from her than ever before. They made love, but it was more for form than actual desire, and Cora was transported back to those early lonely months of her marriage.

Then, to add insult to injury, his barbs and jabs increased and he began to sound like his mother, offering judgement at every turn. So she buried herself in the work in order to forget the bliss that had been so thoroughly destroyed by the loss of their son - and their entire way of life.

She knew, as she knew very little else, that he blamed her for the loss of their baby. She was foolish and careless. He had often called her midday soaks a ridiculous luxury, and though he tried to comfort her and relieve her of responsibility, she knew he still held her accountable for the loss.

Why else would he be so angry with her? So eager to betray her. With that maid.

And yet here he was pressing into her with a desire so intense as to be bordering on violent. The emotion ricocheting between them was a maelestrom of bitterness and fear and loneliness and anger.

When he pressed the bulge in his trousers to rub against her she nearly cried out. Want me! she wanted to sob. It was all she'd ever desired from him from the very beginning. She wanted to be whatever he needed of her. Without his affection she was rudderless, lost and terribly alone. And now, as the evidence of his arousal and desire prodded into her thigh, he grunted and murmured her name.

There were too many emotions swirling between them; the white-hot burn of desire seared her from the inside out. Unbidden, the words she could never say without absolute certainly, tumbled from her shaky lips, at odds with the restrained violence of the moment. "Oh, Robert, I love you."

As quickly as he approached Robert withdrew several feet away from her and put an end table between them.

His cheeks were flushed and eyes glassy and he looked mortified beyond all measure as he took in the sight before him. She couldn't even imagine what she must look like, her hair mussed and her lips swollen from his kisses. Her neck burned where he'd suckled intently and she had no doubt there would be bruising there. Her complexion left nothing to the imagination and she could feel the burn of blush staining her cheeks and neck. The throbbing between her thighs forced her blood to race ever faster, release so close and yet so far, and her vision blurred just around the edges.

Were those tears?

"I am so sorry, Cora." Robert could only murmur before he escaped out of the library, leaving her surprised, breathing heavily and terribly alone in the vast space.