Disclaimer: I Do Not Own These Characters
Summary: Post Legacy 262. Let's Fix This… Seriously it's time…
I Was Wrong
Ah was wrong, completely and utterly wrong. Ah really hoped it would be him, him that came to save us from Exodus, but Ah was wrong. They sent out the kids, just like Wolverine said would happen. Ah shouldn't had sent out that message, but Ah believed with every part of me that it would had been him that came to save the day, and me, but Ah was oh so wrong.
So here we are, back on Utopia, Scott and Wolverine are at each others throats again over who was right and who was wrong. Ah can honestly say now that mine and Wolverine's worst fear about this place has been validated. Kids, why did they send out the kids. That's why we left this damn place, and brought those who would follow us to the school, kid's shouldn't be fightin' this war and Ah know that from experience.
We've been here for over an hour, right after Hope and her team kicked Exodus ass from here to Timbuktu. Ah still haven't seen him yet, he knows Ah'm here by now, and yet he hasn't even bothered to come see how his young soldiers are, or how Ah am. Ah'm beginning to feel like a fool, like Ah'v been played somethin awful. My head starts to swim and ah start to hyperventilate a little from anger. Ah need to get out, clear my head, calm down, get away from these two pit bulls of men who can no longer agree on anything.
Ah leave the room quietly, Hope gives me a strange look, she knows what's wrong with me, so Ah leave her with a small reassuring smile. I walk the hall's, nodding my head in acknowledgment at a few familiar faces. Ah know exactly where Ah'm goin, the only place on this damn rock with a bit of solitude. Heading out the back door, Ah feel the warm wind wash over me and Ah take a deep calming breath and head to my secluded rock.
Climbing my way down, the sun is setting, the sky turning beautiful shades of orange, pink and purple. There silhouetted against the majestic sunset is a figure Ah know all to well, hair and coat blowing in the wind, and being washed over with another warm breeze comes the familiar smell that still makes my blood hot and my heart beat skip, that smell of spice and cigarettes. Of course he would be out here smokin', not wanting to get in the way of Scott and Wolverine's moral pissin contest. Ah know Ah'm not spose to go to him, but my feet have a mind of their own and Ah'm hoping that he'll give me an exception after a day like today.
"Prince charmin' still a no show" he says coolly. Of course he knew Ah was there before Ah made my presence known. His words were meant to be spiteful, but his tone was calm, hiding his hurt behind his ever present poker face. This is the Remy he wants me to see, Gambit, not the man Ah've trusted with all my heart, barely a friend, just a team mate.
Ah walk down to where he is and stand by his side. "Don't start Remy, ya got another one of those"? Ah ask finally looking up at him, his beautiful face a glow against the setting sun.
He gives me a funny look, as if to say "seriously"? Ah shrug my shoulders at him, "Long day", was the only excuse Ah gave him. He gave me a sly smile as an acceptance to my excuse, the man always loved moments when he could corrupt me, and some things will never change. He pulled out his pack from the depths of one of his many pockets and shook out a lone cigarette for me. He handed it to me, and our bare skin touched for just a slow heated second, Ah knew he felt it to as he quickly drew has hand back as if it was burned.
Ah sat down on the hard rock, looking out to the view, the waves of the ocean sparkling in the suns rays. "Sit with me"? Ah asked him without thinking, not wanting to be alone, and more deep down not wanting him to leave, his presence still a security to me. He looked down at me wearily but obliged none the less, sitting next to me and lighting another smoke for himself. We sat in an awkward silence, each wanting to say something but our distance from each other over the last few months had left us weary of each other, we no longer knew what to say to each other without crossing a line.
"Do ya think Ah made the wrong call today"? Ah finally ask, needing to break the silence with him.
He just shrugs his shoulders and continues to look out in the distance, "Not my place t' say". That's all he said. Granted he never got involved much with the politics of missions, but even after all our time apart Ah still wasn't used to him not putting in his say when it came to me.
"Ah think it is your is place to say, us bein on the same team an all". Ah'm trying to push him to talk to me, Ah don't know why, but today has re-opened old wounds that Ah cant quite place and Ah need him to speak to me, as selfish as Ah know it is.
He blew out a cloud of smoke, and looked at me with those piercing dark eyes. He knew Ah was goading him to speak to me, that Ah was giving him a chance to say his peace to me. He let out a sigh, continuing to look at me with those eyes, those eyes that even now could knock me to my knees with their depth and beauty. "I t'ink ya did da right t'ing for da wrong reason Rogue". He was right of course, Ah should have sent out the message directly to Scott instead of leaving it for anyone to find, hoping that Erik would be the one to find it, instead we got the kids, the exact thing we didn't want to happen, all because of my selfish actions.
"Ya right, Ah shouldn't have done that, Ah'm sorry".
"I ain't da one ya need t'be apologizin to Rogue". There it was again, long gone were the days of "Chere, Amour, … Anna" Ah'm now just Rogue to him and it hurt. A feeling of deep loss washed over me, something Ah haven't felt since Ah started this thing with Magneto, whatever it was.
"Ah guess Ah do owe Wolverine a major apology". Ah said, looking at him with a smile.
And he smiled back, how Ah missed that smile, it lit his face up when he gave a real genuine smile. "Haven't seen ya deux go at it like dat for long time, was entertainin non"?
Ah laughed then, a deep rich laugh bubbling out of me, like Ah hadn't felt in ages. "Ya got a warped sense of humor swamp rat"! Ah said the words before Ah could stop them, that name just came out of me in my moment of mirth and Ah saw him take in a sharp breath, his eyes glistening, his calm appearance shaken.
He let my slip of tongue go and just gave me another soft smile. Ah wasn't expecting that, caught of guard yet again by this mystery of a man who Ah once knew better than myself. He was taking it easy on me, which in turn just made me bolder with him, we were always so good at playing mind games with each other, Ah think we were both feeling the pull of our old habits coming out. Everything seemed like an old life we once shared together, me and him alone together; watching the waves clashing against the sunset, and Ah felt a sense of home that Ah didn't even know Ah missed until just that moment.
"Ya gonna light dat"? He asked, looking pointedly to my forgotten cigarette, which Ah was nervously twirling between my fingers.
"Oh right". Ah said putting the white stick between my lips and faced his direction, he taped it with his finger and the cigarette glowed purple than orange. Ah inhaled the toxic smoke and felt a bit calmer, even after giving a light cough.
He smiled at my inexperienced lungs, and another wave of forgotten memories washed over me, and Ah felt a pull deep within me to share it with him, to remember with him what was once the happiest time of our lives.
"Reminds me of Valle Soleada". Ah said it, Ah had to, even though Ah knew it would hurt him, Ah had to share the feeling with him. As though in not sharing it Ah would lose him to the silence and never be able to pull him back out of it, with me.
"Don't". He lost it, whatever cool he had faded away, leaving his face left with just a deep look of hurt that broke my heart. "Don do dat, ya can't talk t'me like dat Rogue, not while ya still wit him". He bit those words out as if they were painful to say.
"Ah'm sorry, Ah just lost it for a moment, Ah don't know why Ah brought it up". Ah lied.
He shook his head a little and looked down, staring at the rock we were sitting on as if it was the most interesting thing in the world. "Was t'inkin de same t'ing to". He said it almost in a whisper.
My heart skipped a beat at his words, realizing then how badly Ah wanted him to be thinking of the same place, be in the same memory with me. Ah was left with guilt than, of how badly Ah had hurt the one person who would do anything for me, if it had been him on the other side of that message, there would have been no doubt that he would have been first out there to protect me, as he always did through all these many years. Guilt at how badly Ah had betrayed him and myself, how Ah gave up everything Ah ever wanted over someone else's memory of man, a man who didn't bother with me the second Ah was gone. Ah hated myself right then, Ah hated Legacy, the cause for the confusion between two men. Ah knew ah should had gotten rid of those memories, but ah couldn't break the promise to remember those who had died in her world. Ah made a mistake then, and Ah made a mistake in living through those false memories in thinking that Magneto was ever the good man Ah hoped he would be. Ah'm fool, Ah thought for the second time that day.
And it hit me all at once, like a damn breaking, the flood of hurt and lose and longing all at once. Ah felt at once free from my bonds over these revelations, Ah was no longer gonna pine over this man who didn't truly feel the way towards me as Ah thought he did. It was time to break it off, and it was time to reconnect and heel the hurts with people who ah knew would always love me.
Ah looked at him, determination to bring him back to me now running hot through my entire being.
"Remy Ah didn't mean to hurt ya". Ah said in as soft and as sweet a voice as ah could gather with all the many emotions trying to escape my tight throat.
He looked up at me, those eyes, looking at me as if Ah was some long lost treasure. "What ya doin dis for chere"?
Ah broke into pieces right there, over a simple name, a small piece of affection Ah had secretly longed to hear for months and a gentle sob almost escaped my lips.
"Ah don't know, Ah just know that Ah don't want to hurt ya anymore.. an that Ah can't stand this distance from ya anymore". Ah could feel tears prickling the back of my eyes, and Ah could see him trying to hold back all the underlying pain that he had been keeping to himself for months, trying to remain cool until he knew what Ah was playing at.
"I told ya all or not'ing chere, can't keep playin dese games wit you no more". There it was, he put it back on the table for me, Ah could either jump now, or lose any shred of closeness that we once shared. He was giving me one last final chance, sensing that Ah was on the verge of an emotional break down, and used it to his advantage to give me one last chance.
And Ah knew than that Ah was gonna jump.
"Ah want.." But Ah was interrupted, a cold shadow fell over us and Ah was ripped from the moment, Everything was the word about to escape my lips, but fate had other plans, a problem Ah had to deal with before Ah could become whole again.
"Rogue, may we talk"? Erik asked me, without a shred of emotion in his voice, and ah swallowed down a cold ball of pain and anger then that sat in my stomach.
Ah looked back over at Remy, Ah tried to tell the man that Ah was sorry with my eyes, and damn him if he couldn't read me like a book, looking at me with those sad eyes and giving me a soft smile. He slowly stood up, never taking his eyes off mine, and he held out his hand for me, Ah took it without hesitation and he gently lifted me up.
"We talk later eh chere". He walked away then, only giving Erik a mild solute as he retreated back to the dwelling on Utopia. And ah watched him, Ah couldn't take my eyes off of his fading figure until he was completely out of sight. The irritated sound of Erik clearing his throat brought me back from my lingering stare.
"Where were ya"? Ah asked, steel in my voice.
He bowed his head but remained without any emotion, Ah was hit yet again with the feeling of being a complete fool, usually lovers who hadn't seen each other in weeks ran to each others arms whispering to each other about how awful and long the days had been with the other. Ah wasn't going to get that from him, just a cold excuse and maybe an invitation to his bed, but fool Ah was no longer, Ah was done with him and whatever excuses he had for our so called relationship.
"I was here; Cyclops and I thought it best for Hope and her team to help you and the Wolverine in taking down Exodus". He knew how Ah felt about kids fighting the battles, so he put it out there, to get my arguing out of the way, as if it were some mild inconvenience that my moral standing didn't fall with his.
"How could ya Erik, their just kids"! Ah was shouting now, whatever mild manners ah had obtained during my time with him had flown at the window, and Ah felt a spark of my old self coming back, that part of me that would kick and scream to be heard.
"Their soldiers Rogue, they are fighting for a cause they believe in, just like you are". He had a point, as wrong as Ah thought he was, and Ah knew there was no point in arguing the semantics with him about it, Ah could never change his mind, just like he could no longer change mine.
"Ah'm leavin". Ah stated this bluntly to him, not really knowing how to end whatever it was we had together.
"I was hoping you would stay with me for a while"? He asked with as much emotion as he could muster. And Ah no longer felt the pull to go to him, whatever bond Ah had shared with him was now broken, and Ah could never go back.
"Ah don't think so Magnus, Ah need to be with my team, Ah need to stay at the school with my students".
"You mean you need to stay with him"? He asked, the word "him" spat out with distaste, and Ah felt an urge to scream at him then, for ever referring to Remy with such a tone of malice.
"Yes with him, at least Ah know that if Ah was ever in trouble he would always be there for me, instead of sending out a bunch of kids to do his dirty work". Ah said coldly, giving him a look of pure disgust.
"Then we are enemies yet again my dear Rogue". He stated, lifting his hand to my face and trying to brush his thumb over my check, I jerked away violently from his touch.
"Your damn right we are". There it was, my old southern sass, and Ah immersed myself in it. Giving him one final hard look over Ah pushed past him and started making my way back to my team and to home. Ah could feel his linger on me and Ah sashayed my hips with each step, giving him one last look at what he lost.
"Where the hell are they"? Wolverine asked, becoming impatient with his two missing team mates, the rest of the team was assembled on the Blackbird and he wanted nothing more than to get as far away from Utopia as humanly possible.
"She's probably off shaking up with Magneto before we leave". Frenzy said with disgust rolling off her tongue.
"Cut the shit Joanna". Wolverine said with a snarl, "Your boyfriends missin to", he stated with a satisfied smirk.
Frenzy huffed and crossed her arms, sinking into her seat when all eyes looked to her.
"Hey knowing Gambit he's probably flirting with every girl he passes in that place, am I right"! Bobby said trying to cut the tension and raising his hand up to Sam trying to get a high five.
Sam just shook his head at Bobby's antics, and Frenzy could be heard growling in displeasure.
"Talkin behind my back already Drake, tisk tisk". Remy said, boarding the jet and giving his old pal a playful shake of the head in disappointment.
"Talking behind your back". Bobby scuffed, "More like complementing your prowess my friend". Bobby said, then gave his friend a slow clap of appreciation. "Seriously dude, how many numbers did you get"?
Gambit chuckled to himself, which caused quite a stir in the jet, as no one had seen Gambit chuckle in quite awhile. He took a seat next to Frenzy and could tell immediately that she was pissed off, and he couldn't have cared less at the moment.
"A gentleman never gives away such details mon ami". He said turning back to the conversation with Bobby. Bobby gave him a fake pouty face, and Frenzy visibly stiffened, only causing Gambit to want to push the conversation a little further.
"However". He stated, and bobby perked up, anticipating all the goody details his player friend had to offer, "I did catch de eye of une belle femme". He said giving his friend a sly smile.
"Oh yea, how beautiful, scale of one to ten bro, how hot was she"? Bobby asked.
Just then Rogue boarded the jet, visibly flustered, like she had ran all the way to the jet without stopping, glowing from the exertion.
"Stunning". Gambit said, giving Rogue a longing look. The jet went silent then, not sure about the particular meaning behind what he had just said and the look he was giving Rogue. Gambit could feel the hate radiating off of the woman sitting next to him, but he still didn't care, he couldn't take his eyes off of the woman in front of him.
"Sorry Am late ya'll, had some business to take care of". Rogue said, apologizing to her team mates and giving them a bright smile.
"Told you". Frenzy scoffed again, giving Rogue her best death glare.
"Well if your finished I'd like to get the hell out of here, if that's alright with you". Wolverine said, giving her a meaningful look that said that their earlier fight wasn't over with.
"Ah'm right with ya sugah, let's get the hell out of here". Rogue said putting a hand on Wolverine's shoulder and giving him a smile.
Wolverine looked a bit taken back, but knew to take her smile as small apology, for now.
"And you". Rogue said, looking directly at Gambit, "We got some battle plans we need to work on, don't ya think"? She said with all the southern sass back in her voice.
Now the jet was dead silent, and everyone knew that something big had happened today. Two of their comrades had some how come back to themselves, Gambit was joking around again, Rogue was showing her spitfire personality, both had been sadly missed for a long time, and a sense of tension audibly left the jet.
"Already on it chere". Gambit said giving a wink.
They were far from where they needed to be, but the ball was now in their court, and they weren't going to let the chance slip away this time.
'
This is not the end of the story, although it kinda comes off that way. R&R ;)