Regrets

By NocturneD

Update: Trying some new editing software.

Have you done something to a friend that was just too rash because you were under so much stress? I have lately and I regret it so greatly. I hurt one of my friends. Physically. Not only physically. But also emotionally and more so mentally. I never did fit well in this town by myself. It took my friends to help me to get noticed. If not, ever pony would look at me being the princess's protegé. Of course, I was not known as the princess's protegé the moment I walked into Ponyville and met her. The first pony I ever tried to talk to. Pinkie Pie. The ever so lovable Pinkie Pie. The party animal. The pony that would do anything to put a smile on your face when you are feeling down.

I found her annoying at times but every pony found her normal. Was I the only sane one here seeing a pony that bounces twenty-four seven? Popping up out of nowhere? Possible destroying the fabric of space and time? She had her way of socializing, I had mine. But for some reason she was just so random. I just could not believe how she acts. Over the two years I have known her she had her moments. Moments of being happy. Moments of being upset. Moments of being weird. You could not go a week without one of Pinkie's parties. Sometimes they ranged from just simple cake serving parties to full-blown rave or extreme frat parties.

I am a pony that likes to keep to herself. I do not bother anyone with my constant studying. I do not usually ask for anything unless needed so. I keep to myself, simple as that. I live in a library with my assistant Spike who is also my best friend. I am a book-worm, I will admit that. Sometime I get carried away with my reading and end up piling books all over the place. Spike as usual doesn't like me doing that because he knows fully well that he has to clean it up. Sort of makes you wonder who's the grown up huh? It's not like I do not help its just I need to be ready all the time.

I have my late night study sessions. Pinkie Pie can sometimes have her party lasts until three in the morning. She got some complaints even the police were called at some point to tell her to quiet down or end the party. Noise pollution doesn't exist in Pinkie Pie's vocabulary. So you are probably wondering what this has to do with me hurting Pinkie Pie? I really do not want to repeat it but I learned that you should not take friends for granite. They might not be there for you in the future.

It was probably around last week. I lose track so easily if it weren't for my assistant marking on my calendar and up all night study sessions. So anyway. Pinkie has been going on all week about her great big party bash and how it was going to be her best one yet. For me, I rolled my eyes and knew it was just going to be another giant party she tries to outdo herself over and over. And you know why it was so special? It's for a special occasion. Then again what is not special to Pinkie Pie to throw out a party for?

Pinkie threw up fliers everywhere for her party bash. Why? I have no idea maybe she wants every pony to see it but it's not like she did not invite every pony in existence anyway. Day after day I saw that she was pulling out more stuff for her party. She already got the party cannon, fireworks, she rented a bouncy house for the little fillies, cakes and other goodies, refreshments, snacks, tables, chairs, entertainment, a karaoke machine, buffet table, various games, a DJ. You want to know why I was getting a bit testy with this? Because she felt she needed to hire me to watch her spending. She had a big budget sure but she went over once she puts the puppy dogeye-look as she wanted the entertainment which was a magician I might I add. I figured what would be wrong going over a bit? Well... We were over five thousand bits. Estimated...

Pinkie really wanted this party. Every pony was looking forward. I wanted to pull Pinkie aside and tell her she needed to reorganize what she wanted so we could fit everything that we could afford. Nope. She never listens. She just brushes it off. Tells me not to worry my little head about it. Then I wonder how was she getting her supplies for the past parties she threw?

The items were coming in but the party was not until Friday so the entire week Pinkie was setting up for the party. More and more stuff came in. I kept trying to remind her if she was going to have a way to settle the debt of her over spending. She just would not listen. She just wanted her bash to be the best. She wanted it to be so loud that the princess herself could hear it. I tried talking to the others. Apple Jack was trying to finish up her weeks worth of work just to have time for the bash. She seemed really happy for it too. Rarity the same as she could finally show off her new dress. Fluttershy pretty much said she would stop by, poor girl did not like big crowds. I did not blame her. Rainbow Dash of course would not hear it either. She wanted so badly to start a mosh bit and have the crowds carry her. Every pony was looking forward to this. Why was not I?

I confronted Pinkie again. And again tried her to reconsider sending some things back so the budget could get back on track. She said she had it covered. Covered? HOW? She basically has everything that would define a party twenty times over! She knew I was frustrated and wanted to keep everything neat and perfect. She just did not get it. I was getting stressed. She kept going on and on about her stupid bash. I just lost it. I told her that I was not coming. Her joyous dance stopped in place like if she froze like a statue. With a sad face she asked why I was not coming? And as usual I told her I had a lot of studying to do. She told me I could study anytime I wanted but a party is a party. I told her no. She tried to put on the puppy dog pout. I told her no. Again she tried. She tried to throw in a comment about how books were only holding me back to have more fun. I told her no but with a more aggressive tone as I threw the check list and budget information onto the floor. I slammed the door behind me and went back to my house.

I told Spike I was not coming and he could go if he wanted to. I just did not care. I kept to my books and watched out the window. Pinkie was still receiving more and more supplies. The bouncy house came a day early. Go figure she set it up the first chance she got it out of the box. More and more I learned about the additions to her party. Whatever. I told her that I quit. It was none of my business anymore. She never did listen until it comes to a screeching halt. But we aren't there yet.

The day of the bash finally came. Started at five in the afternoon, right on time. Spike left and said he would bring me back some cake. I gave him a half-hearted good-bye and went to my research. I prepared my evening with the books I wanted to catch up on. Yes I know, this is what princess doesn't want me doing but today I had my reasons. I wanted Pinkie Pie to learn that she cannot have everything she wants without facing the consequences. I thought Mr. and Mrs. Cake would have told her by now about her spending but no, no pony seems to question her. She gets whatever she wants and if she doesn't she still manages to get it in the end. Like how she nearly drove Cranky Doodle insane just to gain his friendship. But no, she had to say I worry too much and I do not have enough fun because of my books. But she also said I needed to get that humbug out of my rear end and just let loose. How dare she...

Not even a half hour in I get a knock at my door. I answered it and saw that it was Apple Jack. She wanted to check up on me. But also asked if I was coming to the party. I told her no. And of course she had to ask why. I told her it was personal. She nodded her head then left.

Fifteen minutes later another knock at my door. This time it was Rarity with her sister Sweetie Belle. Dressed in pretty flashy dresses and I had to admit looked very good. They asked if I was coming. I told them no. They asked how come. I told them it was personal.

An hour and half later. Again another knock. I was getting really frustrated. This time it was Fluttershy. Another question if I was coming. I told her no, something personal. Just then Rainbow Dash stuck her head around the corner with a lamp shade over her head and a dumb witted smile. "Ah come on Twilight let loose once in a while"! I just told them no. And closed the door.

Finally I was alone with my books. Only problem, the music was blaring too loud for me to even concentrate. I looked at my clock, it was a bit after eight. I was not getting anything finish My frustration grew. I could go over and ask them nicely to turn the music down or just try my luck in the basement. Going over to ask Pinkie Pie to turn down the noise can go either two ways. She would honor it because we are friends or not listen again. Then going down in the basement, it should drown out the music. I grabbed some candles and the books I wanted to read and headed down stairs.

Great. Now I was sitting in the basement for solitude. The music I could still hear just fine. Just then I heard a familiar voice calling from upstairs banging on my door. "HEY TWILIGHT! YOO-HOO"! The banging continued. I was not in the best of moods as I trotted up the basement steps to open the door to find Pinkie Pie along with Rarity, Apple Jack, Dash and Fluttershy. Streamers in their hair along with party hats. Figures. "Come on Twilight. Party is going to be over in a couple of hours"! Pinkie bounced and bounced.

"Pinkie". I said with a stern tone. "I told you that I was not attending your party. I got work I need to do for the princess and I have to get this report done as its due tomorrow".

She titled her head and blew on her party blower, "Well why did not you work on it earlier"?

I gritted my teeth, "Because you hired me to watch your spending. I told you time and time again you are going over but you just kept adding to the list". My voice drew higher, "You did not listen, you are over an estimated five thousand bits and counting but you kept wanting more and told me over and over not to worry

"Twilight I got this covered". Pinkie smiled.

"How"? I asked.

"With my savings. And I am taking out a loan." Pinkie smiled. Smiled like the usual freak she is.

I slapped myself, "Pinkie. The last time you filed for a loan you got rejected for various reasons".

"Twilight. Seriously. Stop reading those books and have fun with us". Pinkie kept smiling.

"Yeah have some fun"! Dash cheered throwing her arm into the air in triumph.

"Come on, you had been to the others one why not this one"? Apple Jack asked.

"I told you I had work to do"! I shouted.

"It will not kill you". Pinkie's face was almost pressed up against mine.

"No. I had all week to work on it and you whined about how I was the only one to keep track of your spending. Well there you go Pinkie. Thanks to you my report is going to be late". I shouted again, "So please will you leave me alone"?

Pinkie Pie just did not get it. "Come on, some cake will cheer you right up". She reached for my arm and tried to pull me towards her direction.

"I said no"! I pulled my arm away from her.

"Twilight stop being difficult! I am sure the princess can underst..." She tried to pull my arm again.

I do not know why I did it. I could of just said fine I will have some cake if it shut you up. Princess Celestia is sure to understand that the report I wanted to give her would be late. But for my own stubborn pride of trying to be perfect I was blinded by frustration and just wanted Pinkie to get it through her head. Well. Replace the thought with my hoof. Yes. I punched Pinkie Pie in the face. Well between her nose and eye area.

Before I knew it. Pinkie Pie was on the ground. Confused. Scared. And I am sure I saw blood. She was holding her face looking up right at me. My frustration was no gone, now I was filled with regret and worry. I looked at my friends. Their mouths open wide with shock. Pinkie's lip trembled as she tried to hold back her tears, trying to hold in her hiccups. "Pinkie I... I'm..." I tried to apologize but before I knew it she picked herself up and ran out of the library. There were ponies outside too busy to notice as the party continued to be festive. Oh my Celestia. What have I done? I punched my friend in the face and all she wanted to do was invite me to have some fun.

My friends looked at me. Fluttershy was still in shock. Apple Jack frowned in disappointment and shook her head. Rainbow Dash was pissed and I knew she wanted to hit me but was holding herself back. Rarity did not even want to look at me. She turned and left. Probably to chase after Pinkie Pie.

"Girls? Girls?" I tried my best to convince them that it was an accident or at least a bad reaction.

"Twilight." Apple Jack said. "You're a nice pony but... what I just saw you do was just... not you."

"I should kick you in the face!" Rainbow Dash yelled. Her face was so red. She was the type that wanted to avenge any of her friends.

"DASH!" Apple Jack pulled her tail with her teeth then set her down. Dash fell on her face to the floor. Apple Jack looked at me again, "Well leave you alone Twilight." Rainbow Dash picked herself up and walked out but not before she knocked over one of my smaller shelves. Books all over the floor. Apple Jack followed her but at a slower pace, she looked back me one last time. "I know you said no Twilight. But Pinkie just wanted to make sure you aren't cooked up here in this library all alone." She blinked and shook her head again in disappointment, "Well Twilight. We will leave you alone. And them some. I hope this will blow over."

Fluttershy slowly followed Apple Jack. Fluttershy looked at me with scared eyes. "Fluttershy please I did not me..." Fluttershy turned around, bit the doorknob with her teeth and slowly closed the door.

Well... I am finally alone now. This is what I wanted. But not in this way. My hoof hurt. But Pinkie's eye I know feels worse.

I sat on the floor. Confused at what happened. I hit Pinkie, that part I got. But why would I do that? Sure I wanted her to just stop and listen for once but she never did. I could go out there but what is stopping me? I am scared that every pony out there might have heard what happened and would give the cold shoulder or call me names. Or maybe even hit me? What would Mr. and Mrs. Cake think? Would I even be allowed back in their store? What about every pony else?

Those books I had with me? The ones that I wanted to read so badly? I threw them up against the wall knocking over some more books.

I kept going on how Pinkie Pie was stubborn. But it was really me that was stubborn. I could not put my pride and worry aside just for one night. Princess Celestia understood. But I always wanted to keep everything organized and on time.

I cried. I seriously did. I punched my friend in the face. I punched our friendship in the face too. Now her great big party bash is ruined.

Have you ever hurt a friend because you were under too much stress? I have...

I am... full of regret.