Disclaimer: I do not own Sons of Anarchy or the characters. They belong to Kurt Sutter.

Jax has been stressed out, a lot, in the past few weeks, not only about the Cartel/CIA, Damon Pope and the One Niners, but the fact that his best friend is not at his side. Jax continuously has tried to get Opie back, to help him run the club. Jax sits at the bar in the clubhouse and tries to find a way to bring Opie back. There is only one way he can think of, but he was told by Romeo and Luis if he told anyone the truth, they would destroy the club. He took a risk telling Tara, so he didn't want to risk adding fuel to the fire. Chibs walks up and pats Jax on the back. Jax looks up and sees one of his most loyal brothers.

"Hey bro," Jax greets Chibs.

"Hey brother. How are ya?" Chibs greets Jax in return.

"I'm alright." Jax says, but the look of conflict that Chibs sees on his face says otherwise.

"Really? Well brother, you were in pretty deep focus there. Anything you want to talk about?" Chibs offers him a helping hand with anything going through Jax's head.

Jax has never felt anything but trust for Chibs. Jax knew that no one, with the exception of Opie, was as loyal to him as Chibs was. It was eating him up inside that he couldn't be honest with him. "No man. I just have some personal shit to work through."

"Alright. Well, don't forget you have meeting with Romeo today."

"Thanks, man" Jax says. When Chibs walks away he remembers why he chose Chibs to be his Sgt. at Arms and why he wants Opie as his V.P. They are loyal, but they are not blinded by it. They will do a good job keeping Jax's head in the game. They aren't going to vote in his favor without being convinced it will benefit the club. Chibs is tough but he's reasonable.

Opie had every right to do what he did when he found out what Clay had done. Opie had turned the other cheek when he found out Clay was the one that put out the hit that landed on Donna. How was he gonna look past this? Opie has always been one of the best members of the club . He did five years and never ratted. He lost his wife at the hands of the President and he stayed and learned to live with it. No one who goes though all of that, would want to look past a third betrayal. But Jax still needs his best friend at his left, because like him he grew up in the club and loves it as much as Jax does so he'll do his best to help protect it.

Opie has kept away from Jax and the club for three weeks. He still is having a hard time processing everything that has happened. From everything with the Cartel, finding out that Lyla had an abortion, finding out Jax lied to him, Clay killing his father, and Jax shooting him to save Clay. These are just the things that have happened to him recently. Opie has, and probably will always, love Jax like a brother, not only on a club level, but a personal level. Since they were kids, they were talking about one of them being President and the other being V.P., but they are not kids anymore. He understands Jax's need to leave, because Opie himself has been through it before. What is really getting to him is the fact Jax lied to him and when Jax asked him to be V.P. still told vague truths. Opie was just told he can't avenge his father for the sake of a deal that's done nothing, but damage. A member was blown up and a charter President got his head cut off. Despite these things, Jax still won't tell him everything.

"Hi Daddy" says Ellie, Opie's daughter, who snaps him out of his thoughts.

"Hey sweetie" Opie greets; he is more than happy at the sight of his daughter. Right now his children were the only people in the world he could trust. Just seeing her face cheers Opie up. Mostly because the older Ellie gets, the more like Donna she looks.

"Daddy, are you okay?"

"I'm fine, baby. Why do you ask?"

"Because I keep seeing you looking off into space. When you go out, you don't even ride your bike. You look sad all the time."

Opie was amazed at how observant his daughter was. But as amazed as he was, he was also touched. When he first came home from prison, the kids barely knew him. When Donna died, he avoided them and rarely stayed in his own house. Despite everything, his kids hold no grudges and they love him dearly.

"I'm okay, Ellie" Opie says with a smile. "Come on, I'll give you and Kenny a ride to school."

They walk out of the house and to the car. Their ride to school is good for the most part. The Winston family told jokes, laughed, and talked about school and work. Despite how much he loved spending time with his kids, Opie still didn't feel right. He felt as if there something was missing. It had occurred to him, there have been very few times he left the house without his cut. Despite everything he had been through, he missed his club and he missed his brothers. The only one he didn't miss was Clay and until Jax tells why the club needs him and the Cartel, he still plans on killing Clay. He pulls up to the kids' school and they get out, tell their father goodbye.

"Kenny have your sister's back," Opie tells his son.

"Okay, Pop".

Opie then heads back home, where he sees Chibs sitting on the porch. "Hey man what are doing here?"

"I came to see how you were."

"Well, I'm fine."

"Still hurting because of Piney's heart attack?"

"Gotta tell you man, I'm gonna be hurt every time I walk in that clubhouse" Opie say with his head down. He looks up and notices the new addition to Chibs' cut. "Well I see Jax made his decision about his officers."

"Yeah, there is one officer he is being very stubborn about."

"Which one?"

Chibs gives Opie a serious look and gives him the answer. "The V.P."

"How is he being stubborn about that?"

'Everyone is telling him he has to make a different decision. But he is standing his ground on you being the one at his left."

After a couple of seconds of silence, Opie invites Chibs inside. Once inside they drink a couple beers and talk about bikes. They were just guys talking. Even though he was laughing and appeared to be having a good time, all he could think about is how he wishes he was having this with all of his brothers. "Tell Jax I wanna talk to him ASAP" Opie says looking as if he just made a decision.

"Okay". Chibs responds with a smile hoping it was what he thought it was. Opie and Chibs had always been at Jax's side. They were there when he avenged his mother's rape and they went with him when he went to see about Tara and Abel when the kid was abducted. They were the ones there for him. In Chibs' eyes, it would be great to have them all at the head of the table together as it should be.

Jax is outside in the garage helping Juice work on a car, when he checks his time and realizes it is time for his meeting with Romeo. He removes his work shirt and puts on his cut. He is walking to his bike when Chibs pulls up. "Just in time, bro" Jax says with a friendly smile.

"Yeah I just came from Opie's" Chibs informs Jax.

"How is he?"

"He says he wants to talk to you ASAP."

Jax was a little nervous to say the least. He had done a lot of things wrong that really compromised the trust it had taken a lifetime to build. All he could think was how can I tell him and be sure Romeo won't find out and give the go ahead on the RICO charges. He was at a serious crossroads. But he knew he had to tell Opie something and he knew it had to be the truth.

He arrived at his meeting with Romeo at the Wahewa Reservation and went to talk to Romeo and Luis. Chibs is not too far behind but he's not in earshot of the conversation either. Jax hates meeting with Romeo. He hates it because every time he sees this man he is reminded of everything his club and family recently endured. Tara's hand being crushed, a charter President had his head cut off, and their clubhouse being shot up. He shudders to think what could have been if Tara and the kids had been in the clubhouse that day. What really eats at him is not just the damage this arrangement caused, but the fact he had a hand in it by backing Clay to get the deal pushed through. "Hey. How you doing?" Jax greets.

"Fine, Pres. Must feel good to have that title huh?" Romeo says in congratulatory voice, not realizing that Jax planned on leaving.

Jax smiles, but in his head he is furious. He just wants to start talking so he can get the meeting over and done with. "So what is it?"

"We just wanted to know if Clay ever got in touch with the Irish," says Luis.

Jax explains "He just got out of the hospital two days ago and we're also dealing with some shit one of my members caused."

"You mean your beef with Pope and the Niners" Luis stops to flash a quick smile and continues, "Now don't you wish you had let me gun them down?"

Jax wants to tell him that what he wishes is he hadn't helped his dumbass stepfather convince the club into working with their sorry asses in the first place. But, not wanting to make trouble for them by pissing off a Cartel, working with the CIA, he fought the urge. "Anyway Clay says he will get in touch with the Irish tomorrow.

"Good." Romeo says. "Do you think they will be more cooperative this time?"

"I don't know, truth be told, I haven't had any real trust in the Irish for a long time. Don't ask why. There are memories there I really don't want to revisit," Jax tells Romeo.

"Okay. I guess you'll have to wait and see" Romeo pauses for a second but comes back to ask a very serious question. "Have you told anyone about us? You know, our CIA status."

Jax looks at him, as cool and collected as a person can be, and answers the question without hesitation. "No. No one but me knows about you two."

Satisfied with his answer, Romeo and Luis each shake his hand and leave. Jax watches as they drive away. Jax walks back to his bike, then he and Chibs head back to the clubhouse. When they get back they go into the clubhouse to hang with the rest of the club. They drink, tell jokes, and laugh. On the outside, Jax is laughing, but inside the feeling that something is missing still dwells deep. He has an old lady at home, sticking it out with him to the end and he has his ever faithful Sgt. at Arms. All he needs now is his best friend to be his V.P.

Opie has wanted nothing more than to lead the club with Jax. In school while the other kids said they wanted to be lawyers and doctors, Opie and Jax's childhood dream was leading SAMCRO together. But too much has happened and he needs to hear the truth to regain his trust in Jax. He still saw Jax as a brother, but he had hard time trusting him like one. Opie's phone rang and pulled him out of his thoughts. The caller ID showed it was Jax calling . "Yeah" Opie said answering the phone.

"Hey bro. It's Jax."

"I know, they have this thing now called caller ID," Opie says with sarcasm.

Jax laughs and says "How are you, bro?"

"I'm okay. Working though it and trying to work through other things."

Jax knew exactly what he meant. Opie was working through the fact Jax lied to him and shot him to save the man that caused him more pain in a few years than anyone else can cause in a lifetime. Jax felt guilty and needed to let Opie know how sorry he was for the deception and about choosing a deal over brotherhood. "Chibs said you wanted to talk to me."

"Not on the phone. Come to my house tomorrow while the kids are at school."

"Okay man. See you then."

With that, they both hang up the phone and Opie started figuring out how best to approach this. He decides that when Jax comes over to his house tomorrow, he'll be as direct as he was the night Jax decided to stay and become President. If Jax wanted Opie to trust him, he will need a reason.

When Jax hangs up the phone, he starts trying to find the appropriate way to smooth things out with Opie. Jax decides he can't be as vague as he was when they were talking outside of his house. Even if he can't tell Opie everything about the Cartel, he has tell him something and it has to be the truth. There was no real business to handle, so he decides to head home. His ride home was still comprised of how to tell Opie the truth without it coming back on the club. Saving the club being taken down was the only reason he stayed. It would kill him inside if it got taken down by him telling his best friend the truth. He doesn't doubt that the CIA will take down the club if they found out he told Tara. He explained to her that they can never talk about it again and she understood. When he gets home, he sees his old lady and their sons playing in the living room and he can't help but to ask the same question he asks every time he sees his family. What did I do to deserve this?

"Hey guys" Jax says to his kids as he kneels down. He greets Tara with a kiss. "How are you?

"I'm good. How about you?" Tara says with a smile on her face.

Jax loves to see her smile. But he can't smile back at her because of all of the things bothering him. "I'm okay, but there is just something eating at me."

"Jax, I love you but there is always something eating you."

Jax can't help the laugh that comes out, because he knows it's true. But he's not the only one who is that way. "You're one to talk" Jax says with a smile.

Tara smiles back and says, "Yeah that's true". After a short pause, she sits down and asks "So what is it?"

"Opie has been having trouble."

"I'm not surprised. Clay did kill his father, Jax."

"Yeah I know. That's what makes it so hard. He been through a lot and I wasn't much help. Do you know how I got him to go along with the Cartel? I lied to him. I didn't plan it and I knew I shouldn't have. But at the time, all I saw was a way to buy my way out. And look where it got me. Not only did I not leave, I'm the President and the man I need to help me lead doesn't even trust me."

"Well, may I give you my personal opinion?"

"If you're gonna tell me it was a bullshit thing to lie to him, I already know that."

"Well then I skip to what I was gonna say after that." She pauses and sees Jax smirking at her little joke. "I think it's obvious what Opie needs. He needs truth Jax. He has been lied to and betrayed. He needs to have some truth. Not just an apology."

"Well what truth can I give him?" Jax asked, implying that he can't tell Opie about the Cartel being in bed with the CIA.

"Give him the truth you both can relate to."

Jax totally understands what she is trying say and he fully agrees. Tomorrow Jax is going to have the deep rooted talk with Opie. "Thanks babe" Jax is grateful for the advice from Tara, but he feels like an asshole for not thinking of it himself. But then he thought, Who better to pull his head out of his ass than Tara?

Hope everyone enjoy the story. Review and let me know what you all think of the first chapter.