Begin recording video log. The computerized voice echoed in the room. A young woman with gray skin and shoulder length violet hair cleared her throat before beginning.

"My name is Raven and I'm recording this video log entry at the request of Professor Samantha Tan, Chair of the History Department at Gotham University. If you look me up in the history texts you'll find that I have other names I'm known by: Rachel Roth, The Gem, The Dark Titan, etc. If you've never heard of me it wouldn't be unexpected, even though I was a superhero over 230 years ago. You are also probably wondering why I don't look a day older than 21. Well I can explain that. I'm only half human. My other half is what makes me ageless. At this point in time I do not wish to discuss the nature of my non human half."

"I was part of a team called the Teen Titans, later known simply as the Titans. The Titans are unheard of these days, as the team was disbanded over 200 years ago, they are now little more than a footnote in super hero history. We were five teenagers who decided that we could make a difference in the world. I had four teammates: Cyborg, Starfire, Robin and Beast Boy. They were the most wonderful friends anyone could ever have."

"The reason I'm recording this log is because yesterday, the last of my dear friends passed away. It was Cyborg, also know by his human name, Victor Stone. As his name would suggest, Cyborg was a cyborg, a partially organic and partially electromechanical person. His bionic implants gave him super strength, which he used as a Titan in our crusade to fight evil. Cyborg was able to live over 200 years in large part because of his bionic implants. As he grew older, he replaced more and more of his failing organic body parts with artificial ones as a way of cheating Father Time. His brain was half organic and half cybernetic when I first met him. Unfortunately, his natural brain began to degrade a few years ago. He had the opportunity at the time to become completely cybernetic, but he decided that wasn't a reasonable option, as he believed that there would be nothing left of him if he took that step. Yesterday his brain stopped working and now I am the last surviving Titan."

"Cyborg was always my surrogate 'big brother' and I spent a great deal of time visiting with him during the past 100 years, when we were the last two members of the old team. Sometimes we would work together on maintaining his old T-cars, which are now antiques. After we disbanded the team he went back to college and was eventually awarded a PhD in both mechanical and electrical engineering. He went on to having a distinguished career at Star Labs. Dear Victor never married, although he came to popping the question to a couple of ladies over the years, but he never pulled the trigger, as he would say. I think that much like me he thought he wasn't good enough for anyone, in large part because like me he was different. People might admire superheroes and their powers, but believe me; more often than not those powers make us feel like freaks. There were many days when both Victor and I would have given up our lives as super heroes so we could be 'normal'."

"Now that he's gone I no longer have any friends. I have been living off and on in a contemplative Azarathian monastery in Europe that I founded 150 year ago. There too I continue to outlive my peers and it is for that reason that I have not become close to anyone, as it's too painful to watch the people I love grow old and die. I suppose that I will cope with my new loneliness with further meditation."

"Starfire was the previous Titan to pass away. She was an alien, a princess of a warrior race from the planet Tamaran. She died at the age of 152 on her beloved home world, where she lived since the team was disbanded and she was crowned Empress upon her return. She had an out of wedlock child with Robin. They never married but she later had a series of husbands on Tamaran, and had children by all of them. When we were Titans Starfire had a childlike innocence and sweetness that I often envied. It was with great sadness that I saw that she had changed when I went to visit her on Tamaran about 20 years after the team broke up."

"I'm sorry to say that Starfire reverted back into the strange, fierce and unwelcoming alien she used to be when I first met her. Perhaps it is the true way of her people to be cold and uncaring, but it broke my heart to see her transformed into a ruthless and unfeeling despot. To this day I wish she had not broken up with Robin, who was too obsessed with his role as a crime fighter to commit himself to her, even until his final dying breath. She never spoke to me about him once she returned to Tamaran, but I remain convinced that his tacit rejection of her, even though she bore a daughter for him, is what soured her on Earth, the human race and what we know as 'romance'. After three visits to Tamaran I concluded that Starfire, or "Empress Koriand'r" as she insisted on being called, was lost to me and I visited her no more. Decades later I received a message from Nightstar, her firstborn daughter, who informed me that Starfire died in her sleep. I will always miss and remember the happy young girl who taught me 'joy' of shopping at the mall or who sang me the 800 verse Tamaranian 'Ode to Joy' when I told her that I was in love with a young man."

"And then there's Robin, who died at the tender age of 53. It is possible that you might have heard of him as he was the best known member of our team. His real name was Dick Grayson and after we disbanded the team he changed his superhero identity to Nightwing. Ten years later Bruce Wayne, the original Batman, was no longer able to keep up with the physical demands of being Gotham's Dark Knight and handed over the cowl to Dick"

"Poor Dick, it's my belief that he never felt that he truly lived up to being Bruce's successor as Batman and it that was why he became too reckless and was killed in action. Dick was always excessively obsessed with being a crime fighter and in the end that obsession not only cost him his relationship with Starfire, it cost him his life. This lesson did not go unnoticed by Bruce and many years later when Terry McGinnis became the next Batman, Bruce made sure that Terry at least attempted to live a normal life, and made him understand that he was Terry McGinnis first. Terry got the message and he eventually married his high school sweetheart, Dana Tan. I guess there are happy endings for some superheroes."

"Robin was an unusual person. Though he suffered great personal tragedy he had a kind heart. He always believed in me, even when he learned of a dark and shameful secret I harbored. In fact all of my friends stood by me when they learned of it. I was expecting them to reject me, and wouldn't have blamed them for doing so, but they did no such thing. Robin's unwavering support was what helped me stand up to this handicap I had and I will always be grateful to him for that. There is only one other person in the world I loved more than Dick Grayson, that's how much he meant to me. I was taught by the Monks of Azarath to always strive for perfection, to the point where I was denying every emotion in my mind. Dick was also a stickler for perfection; he hated making mistakes with a passion. Yet it was Dick who taught me that it was OK to be flawed and he proved it when he came to rescue me from a situation of my own doing. When he arrived I challenged his decision to risk life and limb to save me from a fate I was convinced I deserved. His reply was that he had faith and hope in me. He believed in me, and for that I will be eternally grateful."

Raven sighs before continuing

"And then there's Beast Boy, Garfield Mark Logan … my Garfield."

Raven pauses before continuing

"Garfield was not only my teammate and friend, he was my lover … we never married … and it's not what you might think. He proposed to me several times, even begged me to marry him … but I couldn't … because of my 'problem'. And if you're tempted to discover what that problem is, it would be pointless. Other than my four friends and one of our enemies, no one knew my secret, not the Justice League, not anyone. Our enemy inexplicably took it to his grave, maybe he was afraid of what I'd do to him if he revealed it to anyone. He was right of course, I would have done terrible things to him. It would also be pointless to sift through Cyborg's positronic brain with a debugger for clues; he deleted all memories related to my secret before he died, at my request."

"Anyway, back to my Garfield. I had a small crush on him from the day I met him. He was the complete opposite of who I was: cheerful, happy, carefree and even silly. He could also be annoyingly mischievous when he was young; he earned my ire more than once with his dumb pranks. He once glued my hands to a GameStation controller so I would play video games with him … you probably don't know what video games are … they're an ancient form of interactive entertainment … you've probably seen one in a museum … but I digress."

"Garfield was a wonderful person. I had terrible self esteem issues during my first years as a Titan, I really thought I was an unlovable monster back then, and that I was only on the team because of my powers, which to be honest can be quite frightful. Garfield repeatedly showed me that wasn't true and over the years my secret crush grew and I fell in love with him. He did mature, of course, and that helped our relationship move forward. We started to officially date when we turned 18. Two years later I asked him to be my lover."

"Poor Garfield, he completely freaked out that day. He was so old fashioned that he couldn't fathom having sex out of wedlock. He then immediately asked me to marry him. I will never forget the look of hurt on his face when I declined his offer. I took no pleasure in hurting him that way, but I had no other choice. I did not repeatedly refuse his offers for selfish reasons. There is nothing I would have loved more than being married to my Garfield, but the simple and painful truth is that I simply could not do that. Let's just leave it at that and move on."

"It took several months for him to accept my explanation, which is too private to share here, even though he understood how my "problem" was behind my decision. At first he saw my rejection of marriage as a rejection of him. I explained to him that I was 100% committed to him and that as long as he lived I would have no other lovers. Eventually my Garfield understood and accepted my explanation and we moved in together. That was when Starfire sang us the Tamaranian 'Ode to Joy', which took her 27 hours to sing. We politely listened; at least while we were awake …the things one does for friends. "

"The next twenty three years of my life were pure bliss, the best years of my existence. I chose Garfield for many reasons: he's sweet, caring and thoughtful. No one has ever been so in tune with the Gordian Knot that my emotions are than he was. And unlike Alexander the Great, Garfield was able to undo that massive mess in my psyche without slashing it to pieces and once he succeeded he found the lonely, scared and love starved girl who lived inside that tangled maze. Simply put, he was my savior."

"There were other qualities that Garfield possessed, which are too intimate to mention here. To this day I am convinced that we were made for each other, and I firmly believe that fate brought us together. My life felt like a fairy tale for 23 years, seven months and four days. Gar even made a point of taking care of himself. He never became the fat pig that Starfire saw in the future. Everything was so perfect."

Raven chokes back a sob

"And then, with no warning, it ended."

Raven turns away from the camera, concentrating as she maintains her composure

"Forgive me, one would hope that after 200 years I'd be able to cope with losing him, but you have no idea of just how much he meant to me, how much he still means to me … she sighs … Garfield was a shape shifter, he could morph into any animal. He wasn't born with that superpower. When he was a boy he lived in Africa, his parents were scientists. While still a small boy he was bitten by a monkey and contracted the Sakutia virus, which even to this day is always fatal. His father, in a race against time, created a serum that counteracted the virus. It didn't eradicate it nor give Garfield immunity from it. Perhaps the best way to describe it was a 'cease fire'. The virus and the counteragents in the serum, the secret of which was lost when Garfield's parents died in an accident, balanced each other out and as a side effect Garfield was bestowed with his shape shifting powers."

"One day, with no warning, the truce ended. Cyborg thought that perhaps the virus mutated, we'll never be sure. Our last day together started as all our days did. We woke up, cuddled for a while and made love before we showered together. Gar mentioned after breakfast that he was feeling unusually tired. I took his temperature and he was running a low fever of 101 F. I gave him some ibuprophen and suggested he stay home from work that day (we were already retired from the super hero business). I was about to leave for my own job at a bookstore I owned at the time when he suddenly threw up while watching TV in the den. To my horror I discovered that he was vomiting blood. I immediately called Cyborg for help and he had us teleport, courtesy of the Justice League, to Star Labs."

Raven takes a deep breath

"Even though this happened over 200 years ago, it still feels like yesterday to me … so we arrived at Star Labs and it was complete pandemonium as dozens of scientists had dropped everything to help us. The doctors and scientists took blood samples and from the looks on their faces when they viewed the results I knew it was bad, very bad. I stayed out of their way, knowing well that they were doing everything they could. My heart was in my throat as it was obvious to me that Gar was fading fast. I could literally see his color turn pale as I watched."

"I haven't told you about my powers, but one of them is that I'm an empath, I can feel emotions. I can also sense pain and Garfield was beginning to feel excruciating agony. The staff offered him pain killers, but he refused them. He turned to me and said:' I think I'm gonna die Raven, and I want to see your face for as long as possible, please don't let them drug me'."

"I took his hand and squeezed it. Somehow, I knew he was right. We spent the next few hours together. We talked and I would occasionally kiss him or caress his face. The doctors and scientists did their best, but in the end it was for naught. I watched my beloved steadily deteriorate as the evil virus ate him alive. He was so brave. Around 3 PM he finally lost consciousness and twenty minutes later he died. The scientists moved his body into an isolation chamber, now concerned with the deadliness of the cursed virus. I watched through a port hole as his flesh was consumed by the disease and turned into dust, slowly falling away until all that was left was his skeleton."

Raven pauses and reverently bows her head

I never buried Gar; I keep his remains here in my room in a reliquary. I know that sounds creepy, but I am creepy, or so I have been told. Sometimes, on special occasions like his birthday or our anniversary as a couple I'll open the reliquary and remove one of his bones, usually his skull. I'll fondle it and even talk to it. I'm sure this casts me in the light of being a weirdo or a pervert, and maybe I am. But I find comfort in doing this and I don't plan on ever stopping."

"I have been told on numerous occasions that I should move on and find someone else. I don't think that's even possible for me, but even if it was I would only go through this pain all over again, so I have decided to not even try."

"All I can do now is wait until the end of time, for then we will be reunited. You're probably thinking that's a long time to wait, and you're right, it is. But I will wait for him, as long as necessary."

Raven pauses again

"So as you can see, the fountain of youth isn't necessarily a blessing, it's actually more of a curse. I might be young forever, but my friends are no longer with me. I'll be 21 years old for a long time, possibly for billions of years. Separated from my beloved until it's over"

Raven stares into the camera lens

"Aren't you glad you're not me?"

THE END

OK, that was pretty dark and macabre, but I've often wondered if Raven was immortal (courtesy of big red dad) or not. In this story I assumed that she was.

I hope you enjoyed this one shot.