Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha or its characters. Say hello to the very talented Rumiko Takahashi who owns him and the entire cast. Hello Rumiko Takahashi. Hehehe!

By: year of the snake (at fanfiction) (aka.) crescentmoon (at mediaminer) And now Opal-Dreams on DeviantArt and Dokuga.

What is Paint?

Prompt: Things you shouldn't swallow.

One of the humans at the function he was attending whispered to Miroku, "Where'd you find the giantess?"

Miroku laughed, "A friend of my family. She has Swedish blood."

The girl's eyebrow twitched.

"Oh, I see. Do you think your friend would mind me dancing with her?"

Looking over at the stern faced young demon Miroku swallowed hard. "I don't think she would like to Yoshi."

"Umm..." the boy named Yoshi finally felt the evil wave closing in on him. "I'll check again later."

Soon Miroku spotted the girls he was looking for, the birthday girl was dressed as some old-time warrior woman and her friend was dressed as a fire-cat, twin tails, fake fire at her paws and all. The large cat was dragging her warrior friend towards them by their linked arms.

In mock seriousness Sango glared at her boyfriend with hands on hips and twitching lips. "How dare you bring a Geisha to this party Miroku?"

"Ah, Sango-chan and Kagome-san you have finally sniffed me out." he acted like this saddened him in return. Then in seriousness added, "This is the daughter of a family friend. She's visiting from England for a brief time. She doesn't speak any Japanese, the pour dear, but I thought you wouldn't mind if I brought her. Her name is Sandra." Switching merrily to English Miroku told the tall woman at his side, "Sandra this is my girlfriend, Sango and her roommate Kagome."

Both young women greeted the geisha.

"Tell her that I'm glad to welcome her, if you please Miroku-san."

"Sandra, Kagome said she's glad you've come to her party."

Sandra whispered something shyly to Miroku. "She said 'Thank you for your kindness.'"

"I remember you telling me she was coming for a visit to her mother's homeland. Is she shy?" inquired Sango.

"Yes, I'm afraid so."

The conversation lagged. Then Miroku turned back to the birthday girl with a wicked gleam in his eyes. "So Kagome-san, are you finally old enough for me?"

"Oh!" exclaimed the warrior wide eyed innocence, "I would be intimidated by your vast experience."

"All rumors I assure you." he suavely confessed.

"I knew it!" exclaimed Kagome with a laugh.

Sango joined in, "You walked right into that one Miroku!"

The Monkey King just shrugged sheepishly and grinned.

His geisha companion hid a chuckle behind her fan and white face-paint.

A wolf demon dressed as Little Red Riding Hood rushed up. "Is it time yet Kagome-chan? I'm going to win this year I can feel it!"

"Sure Ayame-chan. Go get the cake and we'll start the main event."

"Oh, goody!"

Off she dashed. Soon at the front of the room a multi-layered blue and gold cake appeared. Ayame then jumped back to them and pulled and pushed the birthday girl to the stage.

Chuckling and walking behind them strolled Sango in her cream and black costume. Miroku was entranced by the tails attached to her back at hip level. They swayed so enticingly. So he followed after her like a zombie and following him silently was the geisha, who towered over everyone present.

When Sango got to the front with the other two girls she announced, "Okay, everyone quiet down! As you know every year for Kagome's birthday since high school we've hosted a costume competition." Sango laughed at the cheering. "I know how you all love Kagome-chan's death by chocolate brownies that has been the prize year after year." Another roar took over the crowd.

"Quiet down, quiet down!" Sango shushed. When the sounds died she continued. "This year against my better judgment Kagome-chan is going to pick a male and a female out of the crowd to be the winners. The winning female will get a plate of her brownies." There was a squeal of delight. "And the male winner, I'm going to kill my boyfriend for this, can chose between a plate of her brownies or a kiss, behind the privacy of this screen." She pointed her thumb behind her at the crane decorated dividing screen.

There was some chuckling and nudging among the male attendees. And a strong feeling of danger erupted from two sources, one of which was Sango. This caused a few of the males to shuffle around uncomfortably.

"First of course we have to sing to the birthday girl and while we eat the cake she, my boyfriend and I will be deciding who has the best costume of both males and females. So could I get all the females on this side of the room." She raised her left hand. Then with her right hand raised she said, "And all you boys on this side."

Soon everyone had chosen a side. And the birthday song of choice was sung.

Cake was distributed and as they ate Kagome, Miroku and Sango made notes on the costumes. "Miroku-san," whispered Kagome, "your friend is on the wrong side."

"Huh?" He looked over to the female side, when he didn't see Sandra he looked over to the male side. Then grinned, "I had you that convinced huh?"

"What?" asked Kagome.

"He's on the right side."

"He?" both girls squeaked in hushed tones.

Miroku just grinned like a Cheshire cat and nodded.

"I think he's the winner of the guys." whispered Kagome.

Patting her back Miroku laughed, "You have no idea how glad I am to hear you say that. He nearly killed me when I tried to convince him it would be a great costume."

Sango began to laugh until she couldn't breath and began to cough.

Thumping her on the back until she stopped choking on air Kagome then wondered aloud, "What's so funny Sango-chan?

"I just figured out who our geisha friend is that's all. How'd you get him in that wig Miroku?"

"Who?" asked Kagome only to be ignored.

Shaking his head he answered. "It wasn't easy."

"I love how wicked you can be sometimes!" she kissed his cheek.

A glazed look overcame Miroku's face. "So worth all the trouble."

The girls giggled.

The female party goers were harder to judge. Finally they settled on a girl who was wearing a comical werewolf costume.

The winners were announced, the werewolf did a victory dance to the front and claimed her brownies. The dance was so silly that mixed with the costume it had everyone laughing.

The geisha approached behind her at a slow walk. Everyone was shocked when they had heard that the geisha they had all admired for her beauty and height was in fact a man.

He bowed to the pretty little hostess and explained that he would rather the kiss then the chocolate brownies. His smooth baritone voice was startling when you saw the very female looking appearance.

Blushing heavily Kagome nodded and led him behind the room divider shyly.

Sango jumped up and turned the CD player back on, as Kagome had planned beforehand. "Alright everyone a few more dances then you really have to go so my parents can go to bed tonight."

Then like a giant guardian cat she sat on a chair in front of the screen. Tuning out the music Sango listened for any sign that Kagome needed help.

Kagome looked away from the tall man and blushed, wishing heartily that she had never agreed to Miroku's plan. Suddenly she felt a powdered cheek brush across her own.

The man whispered in her ear. "I promise not to hurt you Higurashi-san."

She looked up at him startled.

He didn't let that opportunity go to waste he kissed her as gently and chastely as one would a tulip petal. As he pulled away he rubbed his nose against hers.

He smiled slightly when he saw the streaks of white he left on her face and the barest trace of red on her lips. He wiped away the face paint but left the lipstick as it was too much a temptation to claim another kiss in an attempt to remove it.

Comprehension dawned on her. "Now I know why I didn't see you among the guests Tsukino-san. I'm glad you could make it! But why did you dress up as a geisha, you would have been more... fitting if you had dressed like a warrior or a prince or something. Come on, we better return before my other friends think we killed each other or something."

'Friends, that's right.' he sigh to himself. Then licking his lips he thought, 'I taste sour cream frosting.' He followed her out somehow still happy even with his continued friend status.

He knocked Miroku out for the sexual innuendo he knew was coming before it could happen. And carried him home that night on his secret cloud of happiness. Forgetting that they came in Miroku's car.

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AN: I hope you enjoyed the Eighteenth Chapter. I would really like to know what you think of it. Good or bad. Thanks!

The prompts are from zandrellia's Challenge of Things.

Any one have any ideas as to his mothers plan (mentioned in chapter 15.) I can't remember what I had planned, probably wasn't that great anyway.