January 12, 2012
Saturday, 1:39 A.M.

Dear Arthur,

It's been really hard since you've been gone. I never thought everything would change without you. I'm not the same person anymore. Nobody else is, either. Yao hasn't been yelling as much anymore. Ivan doesn't smile like the creep he is as often, either. Hell, even Francis has gotten way less perverted since you... Well... Left...

But I think the person that's changed the most is me. When Francis first told me you were gone, I didn't believe him. I didn't want to believe him. But when he told me for the second time, I knew it was true. You were really gone forever. I almost hit him, I was so mad. Well, not exactly mad, but just... Frustrated, I guess? I don't know. All I know is that I wasn't happy at all. Not even anywhere close to happy. I'm not even sure if I still have that emotion anymore. If I do, I can't find it.

I locked myself in my room for three days. I didn't eat, didn't drink. I only left to go to the bathroom. I barely slept while I was in there, too. I cried so hard, Arthur. I never knew a hero could cry so hard in his life. Then again, what kind of hero am I? I could have been there... Should have been there to save you from that wreck. I blame it all on myself. I really do. You would, too, Artie. I should have carpooled with you to the conference instead of driving myself. You would have never been in that accident.

I'm such an idiot, aren't I? I wanted to be so badass with my new mustang. I didn't want to be seen in your old piece of junk. Now I'd give anything to go back in time and ride with you. Anything to stop you from leaving the world.

I should probably stop talking about it. Matt got me out of my room after the three days and took me to a counsler. She said I'm grieving. I knew that. I'm not that much of an idiot. Anyways, she said that I should take off as much time as I needed, let myself cry- which I had obviously done enough of- cut back on some of my responsabilities, and some other bullshit I can't really remember. She gave me a journal incase I wanted to write in it. If you can't tell by the nice paper, I'm writing my letters to you in it. She also said that I should start eating normally again since I apperently looked thin. I checked myself when I got home, and I did look thin. Guess I'm not a fatass anymore, huh, Artie?

So I did what she said and tried to start eating more. Matty's been coming over every once in a while to check up on me and bring me McDonald's. Even when I'm like this, I still love me some McDonald's. But I'm still not eating as much as I used to, according to Matt. I guess it'll take me longer than two days to greive.

I guess that's all I have to fill you in on for now, Arthur. I'll write to you again soon. I promise.

Sincerely,
Alfred