"Disclaimer: 1) a renunciation of any claim to or connection with; 2) a disavowal; 3) a statement made to save one's own ass" ~Kevin Smith, Dogma
In other words, we all know we don't anything TVD, we all wish we did...down to every last snarky comment (insert eye-thing and sexy smirk here)
A/N; OMG, 3x10 brought us an amazing Delena kiss, now 4x10 has brought us an amazing Delena "I Love You!" (P.S. What is it with Delena and phone scenes, huh?)
Anyway, do you know how incredibly elated I was that they used that song! (Snow Patrol's New York) First, that song is so perfect! And I couldn't believe it, because I used the exact same song in the previous chapter of this story! I only included part of the lyrics in my last chapter...so for fun, here are all of the lyrics...with the best lines highlighted, of course :)
If you were here beside me instead of in New York
If the curve of you was curved on me
I'd tell you that I loved you before I ever knew you
'Cause I loved the simple thought of you
If our hearts are never broken and there's no joy in the mending Come on, come out, come here, come here
There's so much this hurt can teach us both
There's distance and there's silence, your words have never left me
They're the prayer that I say every day
The lone neon nights and the ache of the ocean If you were here beside me instead of in New York Come on, come out, come here, come here
And the fire that was starting to spark
I miss it all, from the love to the lightning
And the lack of it snaps me in two
In the arms you said you'd never leave
I'd tell you that it's simple and it was only ever thus
There is nowhere else that I belong
The lone neon nights and the ache of the ocean Just give me a sign, there's an end and not beginning
And the fire that was starting to spark
I miss it all from the love to the lightning
And the lack of it snaps me in two
To the quiet chaos driving me mad
The lone neon nights and the walls of the ocean
And the fire that is starting to go out
So, here it is... The Last Chapter... It's nice and long, and I hope you enjoy reading it, as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed, favorited, and followed this story. Happy Reading!
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What I've Been Missing
"We should get some sleep." His eyes were half-closed, his breath was raspy, and he didn't sound convinced.
Elena let out a small little laugh. "I think you're right." She climbed off his lap, but Damon pulled her back into him.
"Don't worry, I'll keep you warm," he smiled, and in one fell swoop he had moved them down onto the back seat of the car. Elena was stretched out over his body with her head on his chest. Damon wrapped his arms around her and before he could say goodnight, Elena was fast asleep.
When Elena woke up to the morning light peaking in her eyes. She took in a deep breath, and let it out in a small little sigh. It was a sigh of contentment. Elena felt fingers running through her hair, and a hand rubbing her back. Damon was already awake. "Good morning."
Damon's hands stopped moving. Elena felt his head crane around and look at her. "Morning."
Damon looked so content and so happy, but then the crushing weight of sunlight fully fell into Elena's eyes. She realized with sadness that it was tomorrow. "What time is it?"
"Early." She felt one of his hands go back to playing with her hair. "Did I wake you?"
She gave a little moan. "No, the sun did." Elena snuggled up Damon's chest and into his neck. "How early?"
"About seven."
Elena felt like she had slept longer. She was so rested. She realized how long it had been since she truly had a few hours of contented sleep. "We only slept for a few hours?"
"Yep." Damon cocked his head to the side again. She was so beautiful in the morning. He smiled and she couldn't help but smile back. "But, we've been away from Mystic Falls for officially too long."
Elena sat up, and glared down at him. "You had to mention that place." Damon glared right back. So she just rolled her eyes and let out a sigh. "I know we have to go back."
Damon let out a little laugh. "Well, don't worry. First thing's first," he smirked, "We can't go back without getting a good southern breakfast."
"Is that so?" Elena smiled. Anything to draw this out. She laid her head on Damon's shoulder. The longer they put off going back, the better. There were so many things she didn't want to deal with.
"Well, I think the only gentlemanly thing to do is buy the lady breakfast."
"Do you know a good place?" Elena watched Damon start to throw their blankets in the back of the car.
"Any little diner will do. I'll even let you pick."
Damon turned to open his car door, but she grabbed his arm. "Thank you."
"For what?"
"For last night. It meant a lot to me. And not just for helping me escape, but for the way you opened up and let me in. I know opening yourself up like that, to that kind of pain," Elena paused to look at Damon, who was staring straight into her eyes. His gaze was so intense, she had to look away. "Well, I know it wasn't easy, or particularly pleasant...but you did. You let me in. So, thank you."
He furrowed his eyebrows and looked down, then back up at her like he was lost in contemplation. He gave her one of his hiding smiles. One that didn't exactly reach his eyes, but told her he was trying. "Your welcome." She let go of his arm, and Damon opened the car door.
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Damon and Elena had been driving for half an hour, when Damon finally spoke. "Hungover?"
Elena had been propping her head in her hand, while propping her elbow on the window. She glanced over at Damon, who had insisted on driving. "You're not?"
"Nope. Damon smirked. "I'm a big bad vampire." That made Elena smile. He loved making Elena smile. "How's your head?"
"Not too bad...if I don't move."
"Don't worry, a little bit of coffee and some nice southern biscuits will cure all that." He offered her a giant grin.
Damon's smile was contagious and she lifted her head to smile back at him. "What is it with you and food?"
He shrugged, then looked a little thoughtful. "You kind of appreciate it more when your not necessarily hungry for it anymore."
"I don't think I remember Stefan ever really eating much."
Damon's face tightened, and Elena instantly realized her slip up. "So, I'm guessing your ready to talk about him now."
"Damon."
"What, Elena?" He was a little more harsh then he meant to be. Part of him wanted to turn to her and tell her he didn't mean it, but he just looked forward at the road. Elena did the same.
It was daylight, and their escape was ending. No more pretending. All the talking and spilling of secrets the night before seemed like it hadn't happened, and they spent the next hour in silence.
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Elena was still staring out the window, when her stomach growled for the third time in ten minutes. Damon stole a glance in her direction. She pretended not to notice. A moment later, Damon finally spoke.
"I promised you breakfast, remember?" Elena pulled her eyes away from the window to give him an uninterested look. He tried to smirk. "I know you're hungry."
"Ok," she said slowly, "But you pick." Damon looked over to see Elena smiling back at him.
Damon let the edge's of his mouth twist up a bit. "How about the next one we see?"
"Alright, that one then." Elena nodded over to Damon's side of the road, and he saw the large red sign reading I-85 Diner in white lettering.
"I was hoping you'd say that." Damon flicked on the car's turn signal. "Probably the last one before we cross the Virginia state line."
"Good, I'm starving."
"Yeah, I heard." Elena rolled her eyes at a smirking Damon, but she smiled anyway.
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They were still more than an hour away, but Elena could already feel the town lines of Mystic Falls creeping up on them. If she had to be honest, it was making her a little panicky.
Once they had their coffee in front of them, Elena had insisted that Damon do the ordering. He eyed her up suspiciously, but turned to the menu and obliged. She tried to stifle a smile at his obvious excitement.
Elena joked that his eyes were bigger than his stomach, but Damon simply said they were going to share. He had ordered buttermilk biscuits with sausage gravy, grits, blueberry pancakes, bacon, and a large plate of hush-puppies. When their food arrived, Damon admitted she was right.
They were half way through their breakfast, when Damon decided to stop the chit chat. "So, there's still a lot that we need to talk about." He took a sip of coffee, then looked up at her. "There are some things I need to tell you...things you need to know."
Elena set down her fork, and frowned. "You want to talk about Stefan."
"I don't want to talk about Stefan." He sounded bitter. Damon took a deep breath, and his voice softened a bit. "But, I think we need to talk about Stefan."
"You think?" Elena picked her fork back up and stabbed at the plate of blueberry pancakes between them.
Damon narrowed his eyes at her. "I know we have to."
"Stefan thinks I've changed," Elena said, a little out of the blue. Damon looked a little amused, as if he knew she was trying to distract him.
"Is that so?" He smirked.
"He thinks I'm stronger, and he thinks it has to do...with you," Elena took a pause to look up at him. His smirk was gone. "Some of it has, but..."
"But what?" His tone was clipped and cold. "Ah wait, don't tell me...going through all this with Stefan, holding out hope that you'd get him back...has given you your real strength." The approaching city limits must have been wearing on Damon as well, because he was getting snarkier.
Elena just stared at him with an open look of irritation on her face. "If you sleeping with Rebekah didn't have anything to do with me, then why on earth do you think everything I do has to do with you and Stefan?" She grabbed the piece of bacon out of Damon's hand. "Get over yourself."
His eyes went wide, then he smirked softly. "You're sassy this morning. I like it."
Elena only gave him a quick eye roll, as he gave her his classic eyebrow wiggle. She ignored him as she continued, "Did you ever stop to think that I've changed because a killer hybrid has been after me?"
"Do tell," Damon said flatly.
"Klaus has killed me, convinced Stefan to drain my blood, then drain some more of it. He killed Jenna. It's because of him I had to send my brother away. He's responsible for so much more."
"Elena." He said her name apologetically. Now he felt bad.
"You think going through all that didn't change me, Damon? I know I may act self-righteous sometimes, but I don't know how else to act. If I don't think that way, then I don't know how to get through all this."
"Well, you've gotten through it, haven't you?" She wasn't looking up at him so he took a chance and said, "We always survive." That got her attention.
Elena looked up at him and gave him a quick smile. "We do, don't we?" Damon returned her warm smile.
"Yeah, well...you don't just have me. You have Ric, and Caroline, and Bonnie..." She scoffed. Damon continued, "And Donovan. Did I miss something?"
"Freaking Bonnie!" Damon's eyebrows shot up. "Esther asked Abby and Bonnie to be part of the ritual. It was their choice to be there."
"Elena?" Damon was glancing around the diner.
"Why am I so angry? I mean I am really angry. All I've done is try to be a good friend. I went with her to find her mother and everything. You know, she's the one..."
"Elena!" Damon cut her off and motioned to the heads turned their way. Elena didn't realize she was yelling.
She looked embarrassed. "Sorry." She lowered her voice, and leaned forward. "Caroline is with Bonnie."
Damon narrowed his eyes as she continued. "Ok," he said slowly.
"When did Caroline become the expert on everything? You know she has a thing for Klaus. Klaus! Caroline of all people is lecturing me on giving Bonnie time, and to put myself in her shoes."
"Mm-hm."
"Because apparently everything bad that happens is because of me. You know, never mind that Bonnie and Abby went to join Esther of their own free will. And Caroline, acting like she's the best-est friend a girl could have. Well a best friend would not fall for the guy is responsible for all this misery in the first place..." Elena only stopped ranting when she ran out of breath.
Damon was eying her with an odd expression. "You done?"
Elena let out a deep breath. "I think so."
"Feel better?"
"Much!" He was eying her warily, but then she smiled. Damon couldn't help but give her a warm smile back.
Damon and Elena were still smiling when their waitress came over to check on them. They stayed quiet until she cleared their not so empty plates and refilled their coffee cups. After thanking her, Elena leaned back across the table.
"Damon, I want to be mad at you. I probably should be mad at you, but I just can't. I'm not sure why I can't bring myself to be. So, I've just resigned myself to the fact that I'm not mad at you."
He had an extremely puzzled look. "I thought you being angry with me was like," he paused and gave her a little smirk, "the basis of our relationship."
"I thought it was too." Elena returned his smirk. "I guess you'll just have to get used to me not being angry with you."
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Damon and Elena talked through two more cups of coffee before finally falling into a comfortable silence. Neither one of them wanted to admit that they were trying to stay in the diner as long as possible. Damon brought his coffee cup to his lips, hiding the small smile playing across his mouth.
They had bonded over food and books. Damon finally coaxed some excitement out of Elena when he brought up ice cream. Her eyes lit up as she went through her favorite flavors of Ben & Jerry's. Elena learned that most of the books she admired in the Salvatore's library were Damon's. He even recited a line from one of her favorites, Jane Austen's Sense and Sensibility.
When Elena couldn't wait any longer, she finally asked, "So, what happens when we get back?"
"I've been wondering that myself." He narrowed his eyes a little bit, staring down into his coffee.
"Can we talk about us?" Her voice was quiet.
Damon looked up for a moment. "What about us?" He kept his eyes narrowed.
"Why are you being like this?"
"Because," Damon sighed, and let his face relax a bit, "All the alcohol has worn off."
"So, what? I have to keep you drunk now?" She let a smile tug at the edge of her lips.
Damon cracked a bit of a smile. "You want to keep me?"
"Maybe." Elena's own smile grew.
He looked away and let a quiet chuckle escape. Elena took a sip of her coffee and watched as a thought flitted over Damon's face. "You know, I find it a little odd that Ric hasn't called to check up on you."
She smirked, "That's because I turned my phone off."
Damon narrowed his eyes. "You what!?"
"I was escaping, remember? Besides, if there's an emergency, he'll just call you."
"He can't."
Elena's smile was gone. She went pale, and looked at Damon with wide eyes. "Why?" Elena's voice was full of apprehension.
"Because my phone is off," Damon said through gritted teeth.
"What! Why would you do that?"
"Because I'm me. Why would you?"
"I told you I was escaping."
They looked at each other with worried faces. "We need to go." With that, Damon threw a handful of twenties on the table and they both grabbed their coats.
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They were both leaning on the front of Elena's car. Damon had his phone to his ear, listening to his missed messages. As soon as Elena's phone turned on, she frowned. "I have fifteen text messages and like eight voice messages. Most are from Matt."
Damon held up a hand to silence her. His brows were deeply furrowed, and his mouth was a tight line. He pulled his phone away. "We have to get back home. I'm driving." She watched as he walked to the driver's side.
"Damon, what happened? What is it?" Elena stayed standing by the hood of the car. He could see the rising panic in her.
"Elena, just get in. I have to call Liz."
"Sheriff Forbes? Damon! What happened?"
He came back around, and took her by the shoulders. "Elena, I don't know yet. Just get in." She nodded, and ran around to the passenger side of the car. Damon took a deep breath before getting in the car and pulling out of the diner's parking lot like a bat out of hell.
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"He what? What the hell happened?" Damon wasted no time dialing Sheriff Liz Forbes. He had one hand on the wheel and one hand holding his phone.
"Damon, what is it? What's going on?"
"Liz, just don't," he paused. "Liz!" He paused again. "I'll be there soon."
Elena couldn't stand it anymore. "Damon!"
Damon exhaled deeply. "Elena, don't freak out, but Ric's in the hospital."
"What?"
"He's fine. Don't worry, but we have to get back."
"What happened?"
"I'm not sure exactly." Damon gripped the steering wheel with both hands. "But...something's just not adding up."
"What did Sheriff Forbes say?"
His face tensed up the way it did when he drank vervain. "Elena."
"What did she say?" Damon glanced at her. Her tone was full of authority.
"Elena, Ric's been shot."
She felt her heart jump into her throat. "What?"
Damon spoke in a gentle, but firm tone. "He's fine. Like I said, he's in the hospital."
"Oh my god. Damon, we have to get back!"
"I know." He pulled a hand away from the steering wheel and placed it on her knee. "Just listen to me. Meredith Fell found him. They don't know who shot him. Elena, the thing is..." Damon had paused. She knew he was serious when he called her Meredith, and not psycho-doc. "Liz said that Dr. Fell found him yesterday morning...at your house."
"But...that's not possible. He wasn't home yesterday morning."
"I know, and I can vouch for you."
"Why would you need to vouch for me? What are you not telling me?"
She watched him take a deep breath and glance her way. "Elena, everything is going to be fine." He gave her a weak smile and placed both hands back on the wheel.
Elena felt her breath hitch. "Damon?"
"Look, Ric is going to be ok...and you were with me. So, it's fine. Everything's going to be fine." Damon was trying to sound nonchalant.
"Sheriff Forbes thinks I had something to do with it." Elena looked away in disbelief.
"Of course not."
"Damon...Ric never came home the night before last. How could Meredith have found him there?"
"I don't know, but we're going to get to the bottom of it. I promise." He reached over again and gave her knee a tight squeeze, before placing his hand back on the wheel.
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They were less than an hour away, and Elena had stayed quiet the entire time. Damon was concentrating on flying down the road at what would be an unsafe speed, if he wasn't a vampire with excellent reflexes.
The silence was lifted when, out of nowhere, she said, "Damon, I can't lose him."
"You won't," he told her firmly.
"He's my family."
"I know."
Elena took a deep breath. "One of us should probably call Stefan." She looked as guilty as she felt.
Damon couldn't hide his frown. "Yeah, we probably should." He tensed up as he continued. "Look, Elena...we're going back to reality. So, last night...we can just forget it."
"I don't want to forget it." Her voice was quiet and full of hurt.
"I told you, you'll change your mind once we get back." He steeled himself to continue. "I'm not expecting anything to change."
"You think that's what I'm doing? Changing my mind? You really don't get it." She shook her head and turned to look out the window.
"Elena, let's just focus on getting back." Damon heard her let out a sigh. He glanced over, but she was still staring out her window. He turned back to look at the road, but he stopped when he heard the crestfallen tone in her voice.
"I'm losing everyone, Damon. Soon, I won't have anyone left." Elena shut her eyes tight. "I'm going to end up all alone."
Damon felt his heart sink. The only thing he wanted to do in that moment was envelope her in his arms and never let her go. "Elena, you're not alone."
"When I left the cave I was alone."
"Elena." He was sure his heart couldn't sink any lower.
"There was no one there. So, the first thing I did was go to see Bonnie. You know, Caroline wouldn't let me see her. Bonnie didn't even want to see me. Caroline thinks I should give Bonnie space, time to deal."
"Elena, I'm sorry."
"Don't..." She was deadpan when she spoke.
"No. Elena, I really am sorry."
"No. I mean you don't have to be." Elena finally turned away from the window. When Damon caught her face, it was imploring and unwavering. "I don't want you to be sorry, Damon. We all make choices. Bonnie and her mother made the choice to go with Esther, I made the choice to go off with Elijah, and you made the choice to save me."
Damon took a deep breath, and braced himself. "Stefan made that choice too. He would have done it. He would have saved you. I just beat him to it."
"But you're the one who did. You saved me." Her voice was so full of tenderness now that it physically hurt him to continue.
"We both did."
"What are you talking about?"
"Elena, he was all set and ready. I just got to pull the trigger."
Elena let out an exasperated sigh. "You make it sound like you wanted to kill Abby." Her tone had become a bit harsher.
"At least I didn't actually kill her," Damon scoffed.
"No, you did worse. You turned her into the thing that Bonnie hates most."
"I've told you before, estranged is better then dead."
Elena was about to respond, but her thought got lost. She huffed out a little breath. "I know."
"Anyway, I thought you weren't mad."
"I'm not," she said gently. Elena furrowed her brows before she continued, "But, can I ask you something?"
"Sure," Damon said, sounding very unsure if he wanted to answer whatever question Elena was going to ask.
"When I was down there with Rebekah...well, I haven't felt that way since Stefan bit me. Only...that time you were there for me. This time you..." Elena trailed off. She glanced over at Damon who was intensely frowning at the road in front of them. "Damon, why weren't you there this time?"
After what seemed like an eternity, Damon finally answered. "Elena, after everything, I was sure I was the last person you wanted to see."
"You were the only person I wanted to see!" Her emotions were caught somewhere between irritation and utter frustration. She was met with the same exasperation from Damon.
"How was I supposed to know that?" They shared a quick glare. "Elena, you know that I'll always be there if you need me."
"Well, I do!" She promptly cut him off, then hesitated. "But..."
"But what?"
Elena shook her head. If Damon didn't know better she was shaking away tears. Elena went back to staring out her passenger side window. "Last night, you said you just wanted one more night."
"And that's what I got." Damon threw a half-smile Elena's way, but she was still staring out the window. He narrowed his eyes and stared at the road.
"So, that's all I get from you? One night?" He gave her a quick sideways glance. To Damon's surprise, she was staring at him with big doe eyes. "What if I want more?"
Damon pulled his eyes away and stared hard at the road again. When he spoke it was through slightly gritted teeth. "Elena, you had your chance to have more."
"So, you're just going to ignore everything then. Because now, we're headed back...back to everything. I thought this was what..." Elena couldn't say another word. She turned to look out the window again, trying to fight back the tears.
Damon's ears pricked up to the slight hitch in Elena's breathing. He hated seeing Elena upset. He hated being the one to make her upset even more. Nearly every bone in his body was telling him to comfort her, but a small part of him just couldn't let go. He couldn't accept it all.
"Elena, pretending aside...if that had really been what did it for you we wouldn't be having this conversation. But it wasn't. You were still pining for Stefan. Locking him in cells, and checking him into vampire rehab."
"Pull over," she choked out.
"Elena."
"Pull over!" Elena shouted while opening the door, ready to jump out of the moving vehicle.
Damon swerved the car over and it came to an abrupt halt. Elena jumped out and slammed the car door. Damon followed suit and slammed his door as well. "Are you crazy? What the hell do you think your doing?"
"I was alone when I left that cave. You weren't there! I needed you, and you weren't there," she screamed. Elena started walking down the side of the road, storming away from the car. Damon followed her. "You promised me you'd never leave me again."
"You make it kind of hard when my love is a problem."
Elena turned around to face him. "You know I didn't mean that."
"Elena, the thing is, you did. And it's fine. Stefan's back to his broody self, which means you don't need me anymore. My brother deserves you again...more than me."
"What are you talking about?" Elena threw her hands in the air.
"Let's just say the furry little forest creatures of Mystic Falls are once again living in fear." He narrowed his eyes in disdain, then let out a humorless chuckle. "At least there's a bright side. I don't have to worry about sharing my blood bags anymore."
Elena's mouth dropped open. She stared at Damon in disbelief before speaking quietly. "Stefan's drinking on animal blood again?"
"Yep. So, he's back. It's good for you two."
"Yeah, I guess." Her eyes drifted away, and her eyebrows started to furrow.
"You guess? Elena, haven't you been pinning long enough."
She snapped her eyes back up to glare at him. "Haven't you?"
"I'm not really sure what that means." Damon glared right back before turning around and walking back to the car.
Elena tilted her head and let out a sigh. "Damon, wait."
"Wait for what?" He said to himself, still walking away.
"Damon, I care about you." Elena let out a gasp as she felt a rush of air in front of her. In a split second Damon was inches in front of her.
He searched her face, then sadly stated, "But you don't love me."
Elena was still taken back by his vampire speed. She grasped at what to say. "I could."
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" He started to back away from her.
"Damon, I really do care about you." Elena stepped forward and reached for his hand. "You have become my best friend, and I'm so grateful for that."
He roughly pulled his hand back. "Elena, we need to get back in the car and go." He turned away from her and started walking to the car again. Elena followed him.
"Damon, tell me why you did it. Why did you turn Abby?"
"You know why." He yelled over his shoulder as he continued back to the car.
"No! Why you, and not Stefan?"
"Elena, I don't even know why we're talking about this."
"Because, Damon, I want to know why you." She caught up to him and grabbed his arm. He let Elena stop him, and turned around to face her.
Damon's features now looked tired and weary. "Elena, what does it even matter."
"Because I want to know!" She got in his face and yelled. Damon inched closer to her and yelled right back.
"Fine! You want to know why? I did it so you would hate me, and not Stefan. Stefan is getting better, and now everything is the way it should be. Me making the rash stupid decisions, Stefan hunting down cute little forest critters, and you safe and sound."
Elena's face fell. Her eyes grew with concern as her eyebrows knitted together. Damon looked into her eyes, but then shook his head like he was shaking her off. Afraid he might start walking away again, Elena grabbed one of his arms with both hands.
"Your so willing to play the bad guy. Why?"
"So someone else can be the good guy, of course." He smirked.
Elena let her hands fall. They balled up into clenched fists at her sides. "Don't! Don't do that. Don't just play me off like that."
"Elena, look," he started in an disingenuous tone, "This little role I've been playing...filling in for...well, it's over. Admit it, Stefan being the old Stefan makes me the odd man out, and you don't need me to play his understudy anymore."
Waves of emotion washed over Elena. In an instant, all her anger was gone. It was replaced by a mixture of every single feeling she had experienced in the last twenty four hours. Hurt. Happiness. Fear. Joy. Jealousy. Longing. Contentment.
"Is that what you think you are?" What had she done? All Elena wanted to do was wrap Damon up in her arms.
"I don't have to think it, Elena. I know it." His words were practically laced with poison.
"Just because Katherine picked Stefan, doesn't mean I always will."
"You already have. What happened to it will always be Stefan?"
"Damon, people make mistakes." He wasn't making this easy on her. "You of all people should know that."
"Elena, we need to go. We don't have time for this. Once we're back in Mystic Falls, none of this will matter anyway." He let out an exasperated sigh.
"Will you stop saying that!"
"Why? You know it's the truth."
"No, it's not!" Elena could feel tears start to well up in the back of her eyes.
"Yes, it is! It's always that way!" He lost a little bit of anger, and looked into her deep brown eyes. "Elena, we really need go back."
"Not yet. We can't go back." She shook her head slowly, and whispered, "I don't want to go back."
Damon looked at her confused. "Elena, we have to. Alaric..."
"I don't mean that." Elena quickly cut him off. "I don't want to go back to what we were. I'm not going back until you promise me that things will be different." Her voice held the perfect amount of warmth and rawness. All Damon's anger was gone.
"Elena, you know what I want...what I've wanted for so long." He brought his hand up to caress the side of her face. Elena closed her eyes and leaned into his touch. "But..." With that one word her head bolted up and her eyes shot open. His eyes were far away. It was like looking into a sea after a thunderous, violent storm. "I just don't know if I can believe that. I'm not sure I can believe you."
He slowly pulled his hand away from her face. "Damon..." His honesty cut her worse than a knife. It took all she had to speak again. "What can I do?"
She felt his fingers under her chin, and he slowly raised it so she would look back into his eyes. When he spoke, his voice was barely above a whisper. "Convince me." Damon's eyes looked hopeful, even though he smiled sadly at her.
"How can I do that?"
"If you don't know, then I can't tell you." He took his hand away from her face once more, and turned to walk away. "We really need to go now."
She couldn't let him walk away. This couldn't be over. "Damon, stop!" She expected him to turn back around but, he didn't.
Damon yelled over his shoulder. "Come on, Elena." She felt a panic rise in her chest as Damon continued walking.
"Laundry," she shouted. This time Damon turned around. He gave her one of the most confused looks she had ever seen him give her. Actually, it was a cross between confusion and one that indicated she may have lost her damn mind.
"What?"
"Laundry."
"Yeah, I heard what you said, I just have no idea..."
She cut him off. "Do remember when my washer broke over the summer? We loaded my car up, and you helped me do laundry at the boarding house."
"I remember the black lacy underwear." Damon smirked a bit, then narrowed his eyes when he saw how serious she was. "What about it?"
Elena didn't answer. She just walked straight up to him. She was so close that he had to look down into her eyes. Damon's face softened, but his eyebrows were still drawn together. Then she spoke, quietly and gently. "Damon, you're there in the everyday. I can..." She looked away from him, like her eyes were chasing some far off thought. "I can do laundry with you." She smiled and looked back at him.
"You couldn't do laundry with Stefan?" He wasn't annoyed, he was still just a little bit confused.
"Damon, that's not my point."
"What is your point, Elena?"
She took a deep breath, and looked like she was concentrating on her words. "Damon, you are the one thing in my life that I am absolutely sure of. A part of me knows that I'll never, ever lose you. We might fight, and we might hate each other sometimes, but...but you are the one person who I can hate without being afraid that you'll run away." She changed her tone a bit when she saw his eyebrows knit together. "But it's not really hate. Everything the world throws at me, you take the brunt of it...and you stay. You always stay. I need you in my life. I don't think my existence would make sense without you."
Damon tilted his head and considered what Elena just said. She saw his eyes crinkle, the way they did when he was completely torn in two. She waited, but Damon just sighed. "I told you, I'll always be here for you."
Elena took a few careful steps forward. "I don't just need your friendship anymore. I need you." She let her words wash over him, before continuing, "Damon, I want to be with you. All I could think about yesterday morning was you. I can't stop it anymore, and I don't want to."
He wanted to believe her. Damon desperately wanted to let everything go, and fall into Elena's words.
How was it possible that twenty four hours ago she had shown up at the Boarding House to tell him she was escaping Mystic Falls. Less then forty eight hours ago he thought she would never forgive him for the lengths he had to go to, to keep her life safe. And only two days ago she had thrown his love for her back in his face.
"What changed? Yesterday morning all you wanted to do was escape. The past couple days, you didn't seem like you even wanted me near you. You didn't seem like you were ready for any of this."
"I wasn't," she told him honestly. "But I am now." Her words held total conviction. Elena took a few more steps toward Damon.
Damon let out a small dry laugh. "Now you're ready?" His face tightened, and his eyes narrowed.
"Yes." Elena closed the rest of the distance between them and reached for Damon's hand. He watched Elena take it and place it over her heart. His lips stayed tight, but his eyes grew a little wider.
They both stayed silent. Elena kept her hand over Damon's. He desperately searched her face. "How can I be sure?"
"Because..." Elena let go of his hand and turned away from him, shaking her head. In the blink of an eye, she turned right back around and breathed, "Because I love you!"
She was waiting for him to smile. When he didn't, she took a chance and leaned up to press her lips against his. Her body overflowed with relief when she felt his arms slide around her lower back. She pulled back to look at him.
This time he smiled at her, then leaned back into her mouth as he began to kiss her deeply and passionately. Damon poured everything he had into their kiss, like it would be the last time he ever had the chance to touch her. Elena couldn't believe how a devouring kiss could still hold an unbelievable about of love and gentleness. They both pulled away in a gasp.
"Wow," Elena whispered. When her eyes refocused, they were staring into pools of baby blue.
Damon brought a hand up and brushed a piece of hair behind her ear. He gave a little laugh at her comment, then pressed one more gentle kiss to her lips. "Can we get back in the car now?"
"Did I convince you?" Damon just smiled again and nodded his head. He brought his forehead to hers, and they both let out a deep sigh.
"Now," he pulled back to look at the most beautiful thing he had ever seen, "Back to Mystic Falls?"
"Back to Mystic Falls."
The End
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Final A/N; Thank you once more to each and every reviewer and follower. I hope you enjoyed What I've Been Missing. I may be working on a short sequel, maybe three or four chapters long. The sequel will be published under the name Back to Mystic Falls. It will be an alternate version of the murder mystery (and Alaric will not be the murderer) If you are interested, please add me to your author alerts.
Til next time... Xoxo, Jenn :)