The Prince's Tale

They strode across the sloping lawns, Slytherin and Gryffindor, arm in arm. Lily, her red hair flowing down her robes, was chattering absently about a joke Mary Macdonald had told in Charms the other day, but Severus was not listening. He was staring into her eyes intently, black into deep green, his mouth curled into a half smile under his hooked-nose. He didn't even realise when she had stopped talking, until –

"I mean, how funny is that? Sev? Are you ok?"

He snapped his gaze away from her, a pink tinge rising in his cheeks. "Yeah, I just…"

"What's up with you? You've hardly said a word all day." She was staring at him, and he was once again lost in her eyes, those green eyes that he had grown up with, grown to love. "Is something wrong, Sev?" Her voice was soft, delicate, healing to him, and he forgot all about his worries in that split second when they made eye contact.

Should he tell her? But how could he? What if she said no? It would be too much… but he had to, before James Potter whisked her away from him, with his arrogant smile, zooming round on his broomstick and flicking his hair unnecessarily…

"I just… Lily I have to tell you… something," It was too late. He had to tell her now. How could he live with himself otherwise?

Her face was blank, mere confusion in her eyes as she kept her steady gaze on his small black eyes. His cheeks were red now, and he felt beads of sweat forming on his brow. Ever since he had met her, he had known, and now…

"Lily, you know … you know I care a lot… a lot about you, don't you…" His voice cracked, a mere whisper. What was he doing? He was about to ruin everything!

"Of course, Sev! Best friends forever, remember? What's got into you?"

They had reached the lake now, and he felt a sudden urge to dive headfirst into the smooth black expanse before him, rather that than finish this conversation. He stooped down and picked up a small black pebble from the water's edge, and began tossing it from one hand to the other nervously.

"I mean… more. More than that…" He kept his gaze firmly on the pebble in his hands, not daring to look up into those eyes, for fear of never being able to look away again.

There was a moment's silence, and then, surprisingly, he felt her warm hand slip into his, and gently remove the pebble from it.

"Sev… you're my best friend. I can tell you everything. You're like… you're like my brother."

It was as though someone had punched him in the stomach, and he began cursing himself inside his head, wishing only to be away from here, away from Lily Evans, away from Hogwarts if he could… Why? Why did he have to be so stupid?

"I won't tell anyone." Her voice was soft, the slightest whisper of the wind, and he felt her drop the pebble into his robe pockets. "Come on… we should get back,"

And without another word, the two set off back to the castle, a stiff awkwardness between them that had not been present before.

A few years later…

Lily Evans strode down the corridor, a look of steely determination on her face. Her head girl badge glinted momentarily in a shaft of sunlight as she passed a corner and reached her destination.

A group of three boys, all wearing Slytherin robes and the same expression on their pale faces, stood huddled beneath a portrait of an old warlock. They turned, startled at the sight of her, but relaxed when they realised who it was.

"What are you doing, mudblood? Suppose you think now you've got that stupid badge you can tell us what to do?" jeered one of the boys.

Lily felt anger rising in her, but forced herself to keep it down. You're head girl now Lily, you must set a good example. Keep your temper. Ignoring this jibe, she turned to face a tall, black-haired boy with a sallow face and hooked-nose with an expression of utter disbelief.

"Severus, as much as I hate to do this, one more word of you and your friends performing the Cruciatus curse and I'll have to-"

"Oooh, Lily and Severus!" goaded another boy, looking between Severus and Lily with a look of utter delight, while the first boy made loud retching noises in between gales of laughter.

"-go to Professor Dumbledore!" Lily finished, her green eyes flashing. She lowered her voice so that only Severus could hear her and continued,

"I thought you were better than this, Severus. I thought we were friends. You've changed."

"We were – we are! Look, your friends aren't heroes too! I've heard you're… you're… going out with James Potter!" Severus had a disgusted look on his face, and looked into Lily's eyes imploringly, as though wishing her to deny it.

Lily turned a deep shade of scarlet and straightened herself up. "Who I choose to go out with is nothing to do with you, and that's not the point! Now I've warned you and that's all I have to say… I only hope one day you'll realise that what you're doing is wrong, before it's too late."

And with that, Lily turned on her heel, her red hair whipping her face as she did so, and hurried away, cheered on by the other two Slytherins. Severus stood there helplessly and watched her go, wanting to call out, speak to her, tell her he was still who he used to be…

Many years later…

Severus Snape was lying in a rotten armchair in his plainly furnished house in Spinner's End, exhausted. His face was pale and there were shadows under his eyes. Every line in his face seemed to emphasise the misery and gloom he was wallowing in. A sharp rap at the window made his head snap up from its resting place on his shoulder, and his eyes lit up like lamps at the sight on his windowsill.

He hurried over to the grimy window, heart racing, as he opened it and let the familiar owl flutter in.

"Lily's owl…" he murmured to himself as he untied a letter attached to its leg, and began to read aloud to himself.

Dear Severus,

It has been a long time since you and I spoke, and an even longer time since we laughed together. I understand that you should hate me, and the people with whom I associate myself. I ask you only this. I ask you to remember the times before Hogwarts, before any boundaries set us apart. When we were friends, Severus. I fully understand that the last thing you would want to do is what I'm about to ask of you, but please consider it.

I am due to marry James Potter next week today. It would mean the world to me to have an old friend attend such a special day, for one day to set aside our differences and just celebrate together. Of course, you will probably not think twice at refusing me, and this certainly does not mean I agree with what you are doing. But if you can remember what it used to be like, then you will understand how I simply had to ask you anyway, no matter what the odds.

Best wishes,

Lily

Severus let out a load groan and crumpled the paper in his hands, instantly regretting this action. He buried his face in his hands, allowing the tears to seep into the cracks between his fingers. Of course he remembered, he remembered every last detail of each of their conversations. Not a day went by Severus Snape didn't think of her, didn't wish he'd taken a different route, a route in which he and Lily Evans could be together.

Lily Evans looked beautiful. Her hair was piled into a bun on the top of her head that cascaded down, ending just below her neck. Her simple white dress seemed to radiate elegance, and it was no wonder that as she walked down the petal-strewn aisle, many members of the congregation let out audible gasps. She took a quick glance round at the familiar faces gathered around her, beaming up at her with tears in their eyes – but he wasn't there. She couldn't believe she had even got her hopes up… of course he wouldn't turn up.

Severus Snape stood at a distance, just out of view of the small gathering nestled beneath the white tent. He recognised her at once, her flaming red hair stood out a mile. This is your last chance, he thought to himself, the last chance to stop the girl you love from leaving you forever. But he couldn't, and he knew it. For Lily Evans had never loved him, never seen him as anything more than a friend, neither would she now she was Lily Potter, for, try though he might to stop her, she had fallen for James Potter – arrogant, lazy, stubborn, show-off James Potter. He felt tears prick his eyes as the red-headed figure kissed who he knew to be Potter, and a boiling hatred for the man, hatred so deep that it went beyond a schoolboy grudge, and he knew he would never be able to forgive him.

"Lily, wait!"

Severus Snape stood outside Potter cottage, a wooden gate separating him from Lily Potter. She turned round, scrutinising him, her eyes screwed up with hatred.

"I tried to forgive you. To give you one last chance. But you've kept on doing it, haven't you, Severus." Her voice was cool and calm, but there was definite venom in her words. She laughed bitterly. "I hear you're a Death Eater now. Too coward to stand up for what's right, so you go join him… I can't believe I used to think the world of you. What are you here for?" she demanded, glaring into his miserable face.

"I… I came to warn you. Come with me. We can leave the country!" he went on, ignoring her mirthless bark of laughter. "The Dark Lord… he's after you. Your whole family. But you don't need to be harmed, he only wants to-"

"He only wants to what, Severus? Kill my son? And you think I should stand aside and let him do that? I would rather die than betray James and Harry. Do you have any idea of what love is?"

Severus gulped and nodded, but she ignored him.

"Of course you don't, Severus. If you truly valued love, you would have taken a very different path to the one you are on now. For old time's sake I won't duel you right here and now, but James won't be quite so sentimental if he catches sight of you. I advise you leave." She pressed the last words out so firmly it was like an order, and her deep green eyes were slits as she glared at him.

"Just think about it Lily. I – I don't want – you don't have to-"

"Leave!" she shouted, pulling out her wand.

And with a few stumbling steps backwards, Severus Snape Disapparated on the spot.

Some years later…

A loud crack disturbed the ghostly silence of Godric's Hollow as Severus Snape Apparated before a wooden gate that hung on its hinges. Before him was complete devastation; half the house had been reduced to rubble and dust hung in the air. He made his way to the front door, blasting his way through the rubble impatiently. As he climbed the stairs, his pace quickened, his breathing shallow. His mind was a blur, and he could only think of one thing – if he got to her in time, before it was too late… He dreaded what awaited him in that room, and yet he had to know, had to know if the Dark Lord had kept his promise…

At the landing he swept past James Potter's motionless body, and into the room that seemed worst hit. The door stood ajar, and the shrieks of a baby shattered the silence. And though there was nothing to stop him from entering that room, no physical barrier, he hesitated for a moment, his eyes wide, already aware of what was inside, but not daring to believe it.

He let out a howl of misery so loud it drowned the baby's cries, so loud it split the air in Godric's Hollow for a second time that evening. For there she was. Lily Potter, spread-eagled amongst a pile of bricks and plaster, her red hair in shocking contrast to her cold, pale skin. He stumbled over to her, impaired by the tears that now blurred his vision, and seized her hand – it was cold and unyielding.

"Nooo!" He howled, his voice hoarse and cracked, and now his eyes were stinging, and yet more tears cascaded down his face… "Lily, I'm… I'm so sorry…"