A/N: Hey! So, I don't have much to say this time, except for please review this chapter! I love writing for this story, and this is by far the longest chapter I have ever written. I just have so much fun with it, and I hope you guys enjoy it!
I hope you all had a wonderful New Year's and I hope 2015 treats you well! HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
Chapter 7
It took a lot of effort for me to get out of bed the next morning. I had turned off my alarm four times and was going for a fifth when I finally looked at the clock. It was a little after ten and I groaned. I wasn't one to sleep in because my mom had it drilled into my head that when you sleep in, you're just wasting your day. So, with a prayer to God and a little push of motivation from my famished stomach, I groaned and rolled out of bed, almost falling onto the floor. What a great way to start the day.
Trying to find my way out of my cluttered room still half asleep without stepping on anything was a struggle, but I managed to make my way downstairs to the kitchen without completely injuring myself. When I finally fixed myself a bowl of my favorite cereal and sat down at the kitchen table, I didn't even notice that there was a person sitting across from me.
"Good morning, Ashley!" I froze all zombie-like with my spoon almost to my mouth. For a split second I thought it was TJ and started to panic. What the heck is he doing here? After a few seconds, it was like some wires in my brain connected and remembered that TJ never called me Ashley. He only called me 'Spinelli' or even 'Spin' but that was very rare nowadays. "How did you sleep, honey?"
I willed my spoon to finish the journey to my mouth and didn't wait until I swallowed to answer her. "Great, Mom," I mumbled with my mouth full. I took another bite. Slowly, I could feel myself joining reality. I swallowed. "How did you sleep?"
My mom ignored my question, which I found funny. She's all into the whole 'If someone asks you a question, you need to answer in the best possible way. It's only polite' thing. I could hear her voice speaking the words in my head, but the question she did ask me almost made me spit out my cereal, and I'm pretty sure I would have if I had taken a bite. "What did TJ have to say last night?"
Yep, I would have definitely spit out my breakfast. I hesitated before answering cautiously, because I wasn't really sure what she knew. "What do you mean?" I took another bite so I could have time to think about the answer to the next question she was about to throw at me.
The woman just stared at me. "Didn't you read the note?" Aw, heck. I tried not to let the look of complete and utter shock show on my face, but I was screaming on the inside. She knew about the note! How could she know about the note? OHMIGOSH, has she read the note?
I decided to play the 'I-don't-know-what-you're-talking-about' card. I swallowed my bite of cereal and shook my head. "What note?" I asked, with hope that it sounded like genuine curiosity.
No luck. My mom rolled her eyes and said, "Don't be silly. I know that TJ went up to your room and left a note for you to read. He stopped by last night while you were at the movies." Well, that's just great.
With my elbows propped up on the table, I put my head in my hands and groaned. "Why did you let him in, mom?" I realized that I was so glad to be with Mandy the night before because I didn't think I'd be able to handle seeing TJ twice in one day. Sure, I see him at school, but it's in the distance. Very, very far away in the distance.
"Now Pookie," my mom started, and big mental UGH floated through my head. I mean c'mon. I was in high school now, just a couple years away from college and my mother was still calling me by my childhood nickname. No, it wasn't even a childhood nickname. It was just a name that my parents call me, and no matter how many times I asked them to stop, they just ignore me and call me that name again the next day. "Now Pookie, you and I both know that TJ was your friend since elementary school, and it would've have been rude to turn him away." I stifled an eyeroll.
I took another bite of soon-to-be-soggy-if-not-a-bit-soggy cereal. "Wha thid he ay oo you?" Not bothering to swallow before I talked.
My mom glared at me, and if she wasn't sitting at the table, I bet you she would've put her hand on her hip. "Now, Ashley Spinelli, you know it's not polite to talk with food in your mouth. Please swallow and try again."
I swallowed with attitude, if there was such a thing, and asked in the most polite tone that I rarely used, "What did he say to you?"
She kind of looked up at the ceiling as if she was having a hard time trying to remember. "He didn't say much," my mom said, her gaze lowering to set on me. "He asked to speak to you and that he had something to give you. I told him that you weren't home at the moment, and he said that that was okay; he had a note for you. I told him he could leave it in your room."
I nodded slowly, taking it in, but then I remembered one small, but very important, detail. "But that doesn't explain the window!" I said with frustration.
"What's wrong with your window?"
I might as well get right to the point. "When I came home last night, my window was cracked open. It wasn't completely closed."
My mom just shrugged and got up to take her plate to the dishwasher. "That is weird, but I doubt it has anything to do with your friend." Ex-friend. "Maybe the wind opened it?" She looked at me for a reaction, so I just shook my head ever so slightly. She sighed. "Just go upstairs and read his note, if you haven't already. Oh, and don't forget to do your chores… it's Saturday." And with that, she walked out of the kitchen.
I sat at the table by myself, swirling the milk and what was left of my cereal in a circular motion in the bowl. I had lost my appetite, but even if I hadn't, I wasn't about to eat soggy cereal. I wasn't lying earlier when I said I hadn't read TJ's note. When I noticed the note and my favorite orange ski cap on my bed, I didn't do anything except quickly move it over to the dresser on the other side of the room. The note had played tug-of-war with my mind, and there were a couple of times I almost walked over to it to read it. But then I decided that it would probably keep my thoughts active all night, and as you could probably tell this morning, I was tired enough to begin with. So, I went to bed last night without so much as a glance to what the note could've possibly said.
After washing my breakfast down the garbage disposal, I climbed the stairs back to my bedroom and walked over to where I set the note and the hat the night before. I sighed and picked up the note, not knowing what to expect exactly. It had been a long time since either one of us spoke to each other, and after seeing him yesterday at Third Street, the note could've said anything. I opened the note; it was no bigger than an index card. I don't know why I didn't want to read it, but no matter how many times I brought my eyes to the first line, I kept turning away. Do I really want to know what he wants? I had an idea, but I didn't want to make assumptions.
I took a seat on my bed to make the blow that was about to come easier. I took a deep breath and started reading.
Spin- I know it's been a long time since the two of us have talked… too long actually… and I'm so sorry for that. I know most of that was because of me, but after seeing you yesterday, it reminded me of how badly I messed up. I found your hat that day before eighth grade, and I've kept it because I didn't think you were ever going to be able to forgive me for what happened, and I wanted something to remember you by- so I could remember all of the fun times we had in elementary school. I don't know if you've forgiven me yet… you probably haven't… but I wanted a chance to explain myself. I wrote my number on the bottom of the card, and I hope you'll text me when you get the chance. Please, Spinelli. Let's meet somewhere and talk. –TJ
I set the note on the bed beside me and just stared at it. That was not what I expected at all. The note tugged at my heart because it reminded me of something TJ would do back at Third Street. He would always want to explain his side of the story when he messed up and try to fix things, and this time I might've believed him, if I didn't know just how much he's changed.
His number was indeed written in the bottom right hand corner of the card, and that just made me even more conflicted about what to do. Should I call him? No, I can't. It'd be too weird. It's a bad idea. So much has changed between us that even if we did meet up somewhere to talk, it would just be filled with awkward silence like the car ride home yesterday. Well, he tried to make conversation… I was the one who made it awkward. But who could blame me? If only you knew what happened.
I walked over to the dresser where my hat sat out of place. I mean, I lost it about four years ago give or take, and honestly, I didn't think I'd ever see it again. But of course TJ had it, I mean it all makes sense now. 'Something to remember you by'? Yeah, right. Bull crap. Nevertheless, I took the hat in my hands and a wave of emotion just kinda crashed into me. This orange ski cap meant so much to me, and after I "lost" it, I just felt empty… so empty, in fact, that because I didn't have the hat to tie together my outfit, I completely ditched the dress, the tights, and the boots. Eighth grade was the very first year that I actually had some variety in my wardrobe.
I sucked in a breath and walked over to my closet, hoping that my dress and tights were still hidden somewhere in its deep dark depths. I was never one for cleaning, so I was going to assume that when I threw the clothes in the closet four years ago, they hadn't moved. And I was right. There, in the far corner right next to Mr. Monk Monk, were my red dress and my yellow and red-striped leggings. Man, it's been a long time.
Climbing across the mess, I made my way to my once-abandoned clothes and grabbed them, then started my way back out of the closet. I stared at the dress and leggings a long time before I made a final decision. I couldn't believe I was doing this.
I pulled off the clothes that I had worn for pajamas, and I slipped on the dress and the leggings. Amazingly, they still fit… sort of. It was a teeny bit tight, but the look was natural. I didn't have my brother's boots anymore, but I grabbed my beloved ski hat and slapped that on my head. I was hesitant to look in the mirror, afraid of what I might see, but I did it anyway.
To be honest, I didn't look any different. Sure, I looked older, but other than that I looked like my elementary-slash-middle school self. It was actually kind of terrifying. As I looked at myself in the mirror, examining every detail, I wondered about the last time I wore the whole outfit. Seventh grade seemed like such a long time ago…
I didn't have many classes with TJ, and the few classes I did have with him, he tended to ignore me, but science was the one class that I hated most of all. We sat at one of those rectangular tables that seated two people, but the table was pushed up against another two-seater, so the now-square table sat four. I sat next to TJ because we had to pick our permanent seat for the whole year at the beginning of the year, and TJ and I weren't fighting then, but if I had to guess, now he would move if he got the chance. Fine with me, I didn't want to sit next to him anyway.
TJ and I sat across from two kids- a boy and a girl. The girl's name was McKinsey, and she was pretty nice. She was quiet and kept mostly to herself, her behavior completely opposite of the boy she sat next to. Alan Thornton. Alan was… I'll just come right out and say it- Alan was a jerk. And he was mean. He was probably ninety-eight percent similar to Lawson. In fact, he was the Lawson of our grade. And for some reason, TJ needed to be friends with him. Like, he needed to be his friend in order to live. It was weird, and frankly, grossed me out. Alan was a gross kid.
Who seemed to have the need to talk twenty-four-seven. "So, man, are you planning on playing football in high school?" I assumed he was talking to TJ for two reasons. One, football was a guy sport, and TJ was the only other boy at our table. And two, he only spoke to me to make fun of me.
I noticed TJ about to nod and say 'yes', so being the stubborn girl that I was, I quickly turned to him and said, "You've never played before." The look TJ gave me was so sharp it probably could've cut through diamond, but I just shrugged and turned back to my bell-work, work that they were supposed to be doing.
But no, Alan didn't get the hint and kept right on blabbering. "Oh, like you're one to talk? I bet you don't even play a sport, do you?" I opened my mouth to reply, but he didn't even give me a chance to talk. He turned to TJ, "What I don't understand is how you're friends with her?" Alan pointed at me with a sausage-looking finger. "I mean, look at her," he continued, "she wears the same thing every single day. She's a brat, and her hat is the rattiest thing ever!" And with that, he quickly leaned over the table and snatched my hat right off of my head. What a jerk.
I could not believe he was saying those things, and I would've taught him a lesson if it weren't for the fact that class had started ten minutes ago, and I didn't want to call attention to myself and my table. Although, I really couldn't care less about them at the moment.
I don't think I had ever been self-conscious about what I wore like most girls, but his words made me look down at what I was wearing. I didn't have to, though, because I knew he was right. So what, if I wore the same thing every day? TJ did too! But nope, he was a boy, so it didn't matter.
What made it worse was that TJ didn't even say a single word while Alan was bashing me. That made me angrier. "You think those things, too?" I snarled, punching him on the shoulder, but he just ignored me, working hard on our assignment that he probably had no clue how to do. Ugh. "TJ?" I asked with more force.
He put his pencil down and looked up at the ceiling dramatically. "I don't know, maybe?" He wouldn't look at me in the eyes. "You do wear the same thing every day. I mean, its middle school now, maybe you should change something? I don't know!" He went back to his work, but his words stung. Some friend.
For a moment, I forgot Alan was sitting across from us, but unfortunately, he wouldn't let me forget. "Of course Detweiller agrees with me," he said, smugly, playing with my hat, "I don't see how he couldn't." My hat.
"Give me my hat back, Alan," I started, reaching for it, but he quickly moved it out of my reach. I glared at him, imagining his head catching on fire.
Alan shook his head. "I will under one condition."
I squinted my eyes at him. "And what's that?" I didn't even want to know.
"I'll give you your hat back if…if…" He was having a hard time coming up with something, so I thought it couldn't be that bad. "…If you admit that you have a crush on TJ Detweiller." Oh, my gosh. He did not. Alan had a big devious grin on his stupid face, so I knew he was serious.
"What?!" I screeched, trying so hard not to look over at TJ. I would never admit that in a million bazillion years. Not because it was true, because it wasn't, (Well, okay, maybe a little) but because TJ would never look at me the same way again. I wanted to look at TJ so bad, just to see his expression, but I couldn't risk it. Not when Alan thought I had a crush on him. Was I that obvious? I had always thought I'd done a good job of hiding it. Apparently not, though.
Alan twirled my hat on his finger. "Do it, and you'll get your hat back." Ugh, I hate this kid so much.
Suddenly everything in me snapped. "Why you little-!" I was about to jump over the table and strangle the loser when an arm pulled me backwards. TJ. I yanked my arm out of his grasp, and opened my mouth to scream at him too, but he cut me off.
"Spinelli, stop. You're calling attention to yourself," he whispered. I looked around and sure enough, everyone in our class was staring in our direction. I was just lucky that the teacher wasn't in the room or I'd have a detention for sure. "Just let it go."
"How am I supposed to just let it go?" I whispered back, furious. "The weasel took my hat, and he should pay for it!" TJ just shook his head and slowly released my arm, probably making sure I wasn't going to go crazy. I might've; I was so mad. "And you!" TJ's eyes widened slightly, so I knew he was surprised on my sudden turn on him. "You can't just-"
The bell that ended the class period saved me from probably getting a detention. I stopped talking and stood up so fast that my chair slid into someone who was walking past behind me. "Hey, watch it!" Oops, sorry. I squinted my eyes so hard at Alan, I could barely see. "You better watch yourself Thornton." I tried to growl in the most intimidating voice I could do, and then I grabbed my books and walked away.
I was almost out the door when I heard Alan speak from our table. "What's that supposed to mean?" I didn't bother turning around, but I heard TJ reply, "I don't know, man, but take it from me- you should probably watch your back. She's a tough one." I smiled as I walked out the door. He had no idea.
Because science was the last class of the day, my next stop was home. I didn't want to see or talk to anyone, so when I passed by the gang (minus TJ), I averted my eyes and kept walking. I heard Gus and Mikey call my name, but I ignored them. I just wanted to walk home alone.
I heard the sound of feet running on the pavement, and then someone fell into step with me. For some reason, my first thought of who it could be was Dan. "Go away, Dan, if you know what's good for ya."
"Chill, Spinelli, it's just me, and- and what's up with Dan?" Oh, it's Vince. Vince, go away.
I sighed. "Nothing. What do you want, Vince?"
"Well, you seemed really upset when you walked out of school," no duh, "and TJ is nowhere to be found," you don't say? "so I was wondering if anything happened between you two?" Oh, well that was an unexpected twist of the question.
My breath got caught in my throat, but I kept walking. "What makes you think anything happened?"
"I just assumed- hey, where's your hat?" Ugh, not this again.
"TJ's friend took it," I said before I could stop myself. I mentally face-palmed. Vince didn't need to know that. I turned to look at him, and his facial expression had 'confused' written all over it, so I just gave a long heavy sigh and launched into the story about Alan's big mouth and how I apparently wear the same thing every day. "So what do you think?" I asked Vince as we both sat on the curb in front of Kelso's. "Do you think I should just start dressing differently?" I had no idea why I was asking Vince this question. It was times like these where I kind of missed Gretchen.
There was a pause before Vince spoke. "I mean, you could, but the way you dress is just who you are, Spinelli. Alan can't expect you to change, especially if you don't want to." He stood up. "I'll talk to Teej, but don't let them get to you. I've got to go, so I'll see you tomorrow, Spin." He waved goodbye and walked back in the direction of his house. I just sat on the curb thinking about what he said.
Though it probably shouldn't have, Vince's words set a fire under my butt. I was angry- angry at Alan for saying those things about me, angry at myself because those said things were true, and angry at TJ because he didn't stand up for me. I was just plain angry, and I intended on doing something about it. I just didn't know when.
The next day, I went to our spot where we all meet to walk to school, but Vince and TJ were nowhere to be found, only Mikey and Gus who were doing who knows what. I rolled my eyes and walked up to them. "Hey guys, where are Vince and TJ?"
"I don't know, Spinelli! I haven't seen them since school yesterday!" Gus sounded worried, but then again, when didn't Gus sound worried? Maybe frazzled is a better word.
Anyway… "Of course you don't," I muttered under my breath. I needed to get to school and find Vince. I assumed he was with TJ and maybe he had gotten some answers already. "I'll see you guys later. Have fun doing… whatever it is you're doing," and I stormed off towards the school.
I sat by myself on the stone ledge near the front doors of the middle school, just staring at all of the students, until the bell rang. But the bell wouldn't ring for a long time, because for some reason I got to school really early. What is wrong with me? I had so many tardies in elementary school. Why am I suddenly on-time in middle school?
My eyes raked the school yard for probably the seventeenth time when I finally found what I wanted to see. TJ and Vince. With Alan. Oh, no. That was not okay. I jumped off of the ledge and walked over to the three guys, nonchalantly pulling Vince away from the group. "Vince, what's going on? Where were you two this morning?"
"I was talking to TJ like I told you I was going to, and then Alan came up and joined us." Vince said those words like they weren't that big of a deal, but I didn't think he knew how much of a deal it really was.
"What, so you two are friends now?" I couldn't even try to hide the bitterness in my voice. It just kind of came out that way.
Vince looked behind him at TJ and Alan who were laughing about something that probably wasn't even that funny. "I don't know, I guess. I mean, he's not a bad guy once you get to know him." That was such a Vince-like thing to say, and it made me sick. I couldn't believe I was losing him, too.
The bell rang and everyone started pushing and shoving to get through the doors of the school. "I'll see you later, Spinelli, and don't be surprised when Alan sits with us at lunch. TJ invited him to sit at our table." And with that he turned and ran inside with the rest of the student body.
It's not like that had anything to do with me. I switched lunch tables a while ago, but the thought of Alan sitting in my former spot kind of made me mad. "Doesn't he have his own table with his own friends?" I shouted at no one in particular. Vince was already long gone, as well as everyone else. Wow, those kids sure did move fast.
Instead of going inside like a normal person, I walked around to the back of the school where the football field and track was. I didn't feel like seeing the Ashley's in first hour, and TJ in second, so I skipped class. I'm such a rebel. There was a huge mat at one end of the field that looked really comfortable, and I was going to assume it was the high jump mat. Vince told us about it once and said it was for some sort of track event. To be completely honest, I wasn't paying attention.
I made my way over to the mat and flopped down on my back, staring up at the cloudless blue sky. I didn't know what to think about first. TJ. My mind kept jumping back to TJ when I was trying so hard to think about something else. I sighed, closed my eyes, and felt the spring heat warm my face. He was being such a jerk lately, but I had no idea why. I wish he would just talk to me. He was the only member of the group that I felt like I could talk to about 'personal' stuff, personal being a relative term, but now, I didn't feel like I could talk to him about anything. I needed to get him alone so I could just let him have it, scream at him about everything that's happened without his new friends being there to have his back, but I didn't know how to do that.
I also needed to get revenge on TJ to let him know that he can't just treat me like that, but I didn't know how to do that either.
So I sat on the high jump mat for who knows how long, thinking of ways that I could get TJ back. I was so deep in thought that I didn't even hear someone come up behind me. "Uh, excuse me? What do you think you're doing?"
I lifted my head just enough to see who was talking, but when I saw who it was, I quickly sat up all of the way. "Hello, Mrs. Baumert, I… I'm…" I didn't know if I should tell the teacher why I was out here or make something up. "I'm skipping class," I sighed, conceding. No sense in adding more to the trouble I was already in by lying.
The woman nodded, "mmhm, that's what I thought." She grabbed my arm and yanked me to my feet. Um, ow? "Come on, let's see what Principal Rittler has to say about this," and she dragged me away. So that's the guy's name.
I wasn't surprised; I expected this. I mean, you can't just skip school and expect not to get caught, especially when you stay on school grounds. That was my first problem right there. When we got to the office, Mrs. Baumert pulled me down into a chair next to a kid who was evidently sleeping. His hat covered his face, so I couldn't see who it was.
So I sat there for at least fifteen minutes next to the sleeping kid, until I accidentally sneezed. It was one of those random ones that you don't see coming, and it was loud. So loud, in fact, that it woke the guy up. He stirred and struggled to sit up, and I kind of felt bad. "I'm sorry, dude, I didn't mean-" I stopped when I saw who the kid was. Of course it was him. I was going to ask what he was doing there, but I made the split-second decision that I wasn't going to talk to him at all.
The words came out of his mouth instead, along with an obnoxious laugh. "Well, if it isn't for Ms. Tough Girl herself. I should've known you'd be here." Alan smirked and looked me up and down. "And I see you're still sporting the 'Spinelli' outfit." I wanted to punch him so hard right there in the middle of the principal's waiting room, but after a deep breath, I decided against it. The Principal already didn't like me because of my brothers, and now I was caught skipping class. Who knows what he'll do to me if I punched a fellow student?
I just stared straight ahead while Alan kept taunting me, but fortunately it wasn't for long because he was called in to the main office. He laughed as he walked away, but something in his backpack caught my eye. My hat! My hat was hanging out of his backpack! I started coming up with a plan on how to get it back. Yes, yes that could work.
I had no idea what Alan had done to get sent to the principal's office, but whatever it was, he was sure taking a long time in there. I glanced at the clock. 30 minutes. Thirty minutes had passed since he went in there, and there was no way to tell when he'd be coming out-
The door opened, and Alan was there, and he looked pretty distressed, but that didn't stop him from making a snide comment on his way out. "See you later, Spinelli," he smirked, vulgarly. Man, he really made me mad sometimes.
He had to walk right past me in order to leave, so despite my promise of not talking to him, nothing stopped me from sticking my foot out, which resulted in him almost falling flat on his face. He glared at me but kept walking, and I resisted the urge to laugh. Instead, I waited until the door shut, and then I let loose, almost crying from the pain in my stomach muscles.
"Ms. Spinelli," A call from Rittler's office made me compose myself, "please come in here." I took a deep breath. Alright, let's get this over with.
It wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. Maybe because it was actually the first time all year that I was sent there. All Rittler gave me was a warming and a stern 'don't do it again, or next time you have detention'. I could live with that.
I got out of there just in time for lunch, which was good because boy, was I starving! I hopped in line to get a cheeseburger, but I didn't even notice who was getting in line behind me. Wanting to be polite, I said, "Hi TJ," but I didn't look at him. Obviously he thought nothing was wrong if he purposely got in line behind me.
He didn't ignore me like I thought he would. "Hey, Spinelli, have you seen Alan?" Oh, so that's why he was talking to me.
I shook my head, but I still didn't look at him. I got my food instead, and my mouth started to water. "Nope, haven't seen him. The last time I saw him was in the principal's office."
"What? You were in the principal's office? What for?" TJ sounded surprised, but it was lost on me. Although, it was nice to know he cared, even just a little bit.
"Nothing. It doesn't matter. Anyway, I haven't seen Alan, but he should be around here, somewhere. I'll see you later," and with that, I left him standing by the fries with a slightly dumfounded look on his face.
It was weird. I went through the rest of the day without seeing Alan at all, even in science when he was supposed to sit across from me, but I just assumed he got sent home for whatever he did to get sent to the office in the first place. The silence between me and TJ was so awkward that I had to put a stop to it. "Alright, man, what's your deal?" I wanted answers, and I wanted them now. "You've been acting weird for months!"
I expected him to get mad and defend himself, but instead he just sighed, "I could say the same thing to you, Spin." I started to ask him what that could possibly mean, but he continued to talk. "I mean, you switched tables on us, Spinelli! It's not like we kicked you out. It was your own choice." Oh, no. He cannot use that excuse.
I was flabbergasted. "Only because someone else was sitting in my spot the entire week leading up to choosing day. How was I supposed to know he wasn't going to sit there again?"
"Because we're your friends! At least, I thought we were." He sounded sad, but I knew it was just an act. He didn't really care.
"At least I'm not friends with a jerk!"
TJ's eyes widened in half astonishment, half anger, sadness gone. "Who? Alan? He's not a jerk!"
"Well, it's funny how you knew I was talking about him!"
"You know what, Spinelli? I think we need a break from each other."
Before I could stop myself, I agreed. "Yeah, that sounds like a good idea." Wait, what am I saying?
TJ looked taken aback, probably because he expected me to fight for our friendship, but I was tired of all the stress he had been causing me. "Fine, if that's what you want." He stood up and grabbed his books to leave. The bell had rung a couple minutes before, but we were in the heat of our 'discussion'. "I'll see you around."
Of course it wasn't what I wanted, but I didn't see any other way to fix the problem. Heck, I didn't even know what the problem was exactly. All I knew is that I was watching my best friend since kindergarten walk out of the classroom without ever knowing if I was going to talk to him again or not. It was a sick feeling.
I ended up walking home by myself again, but I didn't mind it. It gave me time to think. I was in the mood for something frosty so I made my way to Kelso's for a milkshake. I hadn't had one in over a week, and I was having serious withdrawals. I had already gone inside when I noticed Alan sitting at the counter, so I quickly hit behind one of the candy isles. What was he doing there? I thought he got suspended or something.
I peeked out from behind the shelves of wingerdingers and spotted his backpack sitting on the floor next to his seat. Luckily, my hat was still sticking out of the side pocket. The plan I had come up with earlier to get my hat back wasn't going to work now that we weren't in school, so my only option was to try to sneak up behind him and grab it. Well, here goes nothing.
Crawling oh so quietly across the floor, I reached Alan and his backpack, and thankfully, he hadn't noticed me. I reached out and grabbed my hat, but I was struggling to pull it loose from the strap. Almost there… I yanked the hat loose and almost fell back on my butt, right as Mr. Kelso said, "Why, hello Spinelli! What can I get for you today?" And then Alan turned around and glared at me.
I closed my eyes. I was so close getting out of there without Alan noticing me, but of course, Mr. Kelso had to be his friendly, polite self. I stood up and put my orange ski cap on my head. "Hi, Mr. K, can I just get a strawberry soda please? I'm not really in the mood for anything fancy." As he nodded and walked away, I sat down on a stool that put enough distance between me and Alan as possible.
But that didn't stop the lummox from talking. "So, I see you've resorted to snooping through my things now. Find anything you like?"
I snorted. "Yeah, right. Don't flatter yourself, Thornton. I was just getting my hat back that you stole!"
"Yeah, well, do it again, and I'm gonna make sure you regret it!" I wasn't looking at him, but I heard him get up and the ding of the bell that signaled the opening and closing of the store's doors. Sheesh, some people.
"What was that about?" Mr. Kelso asked, handing me my drink.
I took a long sip and swallowed. "Nothin', he's just TJ's new best friend." If I could hear the hurt in my voice, I was sure Kelso could pick up on it, too. I tried to correct myself. "I mean, I don't care." I took another sip.
Mr. Kelso looked sad. "Are you and TJ not friends anymore?"
I was about to nod and say we were, but then I remembered our conversation at the end of science class and stopped myself. Were we still friends? "I don't know, Mr. Kelso. He's changed."
He nodded understandingly and then said something I never would have guessed. "He was in here just the other day talking about you in the same way." What?
I almost spit out my soda. "He was? But why?"
Mr. Kelso shook his head. "I don't know, Spinelli, but he told me he misses you. Maybe you should call him?" If I wasn't talking to Mr. Kelso, I definitely would have not believed for one second that TJ missed me, not the way he'd been acting. It made my heart clench.
"Okay, I will when I get home." I finished off the last of my soda and hopped off of the chair. "Thanks for everything, Mr. K!" I smiled and ran out the door.
"You're welcome, Spinelli!" I heard Mr. Kelso call back to me.
I ran all the way home and was a bit out of breath by the time I reached my driveway. Man, I was out of shape. Maybe I should start running. I laughed. No way, running was for scums. My parents weren't home yet; they were probably still at work, so I went over to the phone. I couldn't believe I was calling TJ after we said we needed time apart. Was this really a good idea?
The phone in my hands started to ring before I even made the decision. "Hello?" I answered on the second ring.
"Spinelli? It's me, TJ, we need to talk."
I was happy that he was the one to call and not me. I felt like that would have been more awkward. "Hey, Teej! I'm glad you called. I wanted to talk to you about-"
He cut me off mid-sentence. "How could you do that to him, Spinelli?" Huh?
"What are you talking about, TJ?" Like, seriously, what are you talking about?
"I know you don't like him, but did you really have to fight him?"
"I have no idea what you're even talking about! Who did I fight? The last I checked, I haven't fought nobody!"
"Don't act dumb, Spinelli! Alan told me what you did!" WHAT?
"Alan?! Alan told you I fought him, and you believed him?" I could not believe what I was hearing. It was like the Gretchen incident all over again.
"Of course I believe him! He has the bruises to prove it!"
"Bruises? I have no idea what you're talking about! He was fine in Kelso's about an hour ago. So, please enlighten me on what I've done."
TJ was getting angrier by the second, as well as I. "I don't need to tell you anything except for we're done!"
I couldn't help myself. "You know, you're starting to sound like Gretchen."
There was a brief pause on the other end of the line, and then it was like TJ dropped a bomb on the conversation. "Maybe she was right! Spinelli, you've been acting like a jerk lately, and I don't want to be a part of it anymore. Call me when you figure yourself out, but until then, don't come running to me for anything!" Then, he hung up on me.
I stood there for long time after the call ended trying to process what had just happened. It was TJ's voice, but it didn't sound like TJ. And he said I changed? Ugh, as if. If there was one person who changed the most out of everyone, it was him. I slammed the phone back on the hook and ran upstairs to my room.
My parents had given me a sketchbook for Christmas last year that I could doodle in, and I had the urge to draw me, TJ, and the gang back when we were still best friends. It took me about two hours to finish, and by the time I was done, I had actually broken a sweat. I had to say, it was a good drawing, probably one of the better ones I've done since my masterpiece on the blacktop three years ago. Man, things sure have changed since then.
I actually debated on giving the picture to TJ, maybe spark some old memories? Well, I'd see him tomorrow, sometime, and maybe if I feel gutsy I'll give it to him.
Turned out, I didn't have to worry about finding the courage to give him the drawing because he avoided me all day during school. He even skipped science. That scumbag…
I collapsed on my bed from emotional exhaustion. Sure, that whole incident with TJ and Alan was a long time ago, but I had forgotten all about it. Now that I thought about it, it actually explained a lot.
My phone lit up from my bedside table- the sound was still turned off from last night. It was a text message. Oh, God. I hesitated looking at it, in fear that it was TJ, but then I remembered that TJ didn't have my number. On my stomach, I reached across the bed to press the open button. I let out a breath of relief. The message was from Andrea, but I didn't have the heart to carry on a conversation at the moment, so I left the phone on the nightstand and turned over to my back.
My mind wandered back to TJ's number. Should I call him? Or should I txt him? Which would be less weird? Why would it be weird? Because of the incident that happened during the summer right before eighth grade. Oh, right. Well, he still remembered what had happened. The car ride home yesterday told me that much.
But did I still remember every detail? We learned in psychology that some people end up twisting the details and repressing traumatic memories that happened to them. At least I didn't think that happened to me. It was a pretty life-changing event that I don't think I could forget even if I tried. It was mostly TJ's fault, but what had happened to TJ that could have made him like that? Repressed memories or not, this is how I remember the story…
The summer between seventh and eighth grade was the first summer that I didn't go to camp, and neither did Vince, Mikey, Gus, and TJ. I didn't know about Gretchen, but I assumed she went back to whatever camp she attended last summer.
The summer between seventh and eighth grade was also the first summer that the gang didn't hang out much altogether. I think that was partly because of me because I didn't hang out with them much. I did stuff with the group sometimes, but I was with Andrea for most of the summer.
TJ and I were on better terms during the summer, too, but it was nothing like we were before. He had become a bit rebellious, and there were even rumors going around that he had started drinking. I didn't want to believe it, but I wasn't too surprised. If anything, it made me sad.
There was a new Señor Fusion movie coming out, and I knew we were getting older, but it was one of those movie series that no matter how old you got, you still had to see the next one, and Vince and I had always talked about going.
So, on one normal afternoon, a couple weekends before school started, I called Vince. "Hey, Vince, how's it going, man?"
"Hey, Spinelli! It's good, what's up?"
"That new Senor Fusion movie! Feel like goin'?"
"Definitely!" Vince said, excitedly. "Call Mikey and Gus, and I'll meet you in the park." The park? "I think TJ's there and I know he'll want to come." Oh.
"Okay! See you soon!" And we hung up. I didn't care that TJ was coming, in fact, I was kind of excited to see him, but he was the member I talked to the least. But whatever.
I called Mikey who was with Gus and told them about the movie details, and then made my way to the park to meet Vince and TJ.
I don't know why, but for some reason I didn't expect TJ to be with people. For some reason, I thought he would be there alone, but he was there, on the field, with Alan and Derek and a few other guys that I semi-recognized from some of my classes, throwing around a football.
When I walked up to them, Alan was the first one to start talking. Of course. "Oh, hey guys, look! It's Spinelli," he caught the football that Derek threw to him and stared at me with a devious grin that I knew he didn't mean as polite. "And, look! She's still wearing that hat."
I rolled my eyes. That's always what it was with him- him making fun of my clothes. It was like he couldn't find anything else to tease me for. What I didn't expect, though, was him sprinting over to me and taking my hat from me again. But this time, I just let him have it. If I didn't give him the satisfaction of being mad, then maybe he would see how childish he was being and give it back to me.
But then he started playing 'monkey-in-the-middle' with it, and with a loud, "Detweiller", TJ joined in. I wasn't jumping for it, like Alan thought I would, but I was planning carefully on how to catch it on the first try. After several tosses back and forth from TJ to Alan, I realized there was no way I could catch it because they were throwing it too high over my head. Shorty problems.
I mapped out my plan in my head, and then I started running. Towards TJ. I knew what I had to do, but it wouldn't be pretty. As soon as TJ caught my hat in his hands, I tackled him to the ground with an 'oomph'! Although I wasn't heavy, he struggled getting his arm out from under me, but eventually, he did. He threw my hat in a weird direction behind him, and then shoved me hard. "Get offa me, Spinelli," he growled.
He didn't have to tell me twice. I hopped off of TJ and ran into the street where my hat had landed. With my hat in my hand, I turned back to TJ, angrier than ever, but TJ had started yelling at me first. "Why do you have to be such a jerk, Spinelli? We were only having a little fun!" I narrowed my eyes at him. I didn't know if it was the power of suggestion speaking, but I couldn't tell if TJ had had a little bit to drink before this. There was something about the way he talked.
"Guys, GUYS! What are you doing?" Vince came running up to us. "You two are friends!" Had he not gotten the memo? TJ ignored him and just gave me a deathly glare.
I was tired of fighting with him like this all of the time, but each time, he made me mad. "Me, a jerk? You're the one to talk! Why I oughta-" I clenched my teeth and shoved TJ hard, and he almost fell down but not quite. TJ glared at me like he wanted to murder me, and I returned the look, until TJ shoved me back with the same amount of force if not harder. Because he definitely had more weight on me, I staggered backwards into the street, struggling to regain my balance, and eventually fell onto my butt.
Honestly, I was kind of scared. I didn't think I had ever seen him this mad before, and all of his anger was focused on me, but then his eyes widened in terror, and I became very confused. "Spinelli! Watch-" HOOONNNKKKKK. The sound of a car horn cut him off.
I didn't know what he was trying to say, and there wasn't enough time to figure it out before I was flung sideways onto the pavement. I tried to open my eyes, but my whole body hurt. What happened? I couldn't move, couldn't do anything expect watch the group of guys standing on the side of the street whisper. Most of them turned and ran, but Vince, TJ, and Alan stayed, although Alan was trying to leave.
"Dude, man, look, we gotta go!" Alan said urgently, pulling on TJ's arm, but TJ wouldn't budge. He just looked at me with a stricken expression. "Dude, come on! Let's go." No, TJ, please don't leave. I didn't have the capability of actually saying the words, but I wanted him to stay.
Slowly, TJ let Alan pull him away as soon as sirens were heard in the distance, but before he turned around and ran, the last thing I heard was, "I'm so sorry, Spin."
And then I shut my eyes, unable to open them back up again.
I hope you guys liked chapter seven! If you guys have comments or questions, please review! I love hearing what you guys think!
I'm glad I was able to update this story in less than a year, and hopefully next time, it will be even faster, but I always say that and it doesn't happen.
Anyway, THANKS for taking the time to read this (and hopefully review), and I hope you enjoy the rest of your winter break!
-ecStarz