So much thanks to my incredible beta Cristi0819, I don't know that I could have finished this story without you. You rocked my world constantly with your help and advice, thank you is not enough.

Chapter 16 - Steph's POV

Tank's voice was calling to me as I ran down the street towards his house. I was pulling my jacket around me as my feet throbbed from running for miles without shoes. Despite the pain, I knew I had to keep running. I knew that Tank's house and voice represented safety and comfort.

"Stephanie, shh. It's okay, I'm right here. Open your eyes." Tank's firm voice broke through the fog of my nightmare, forcing me to open my eyes and let out a gasp. I sat up and met his eyes and could feel tears building. He pulled me onto his lap, his arms squeezing me tightly.

"I was running to you." I sighed into his embrace, relaxing into the security of his strong arms. "I haven't had such a bad nightmare in a while." A tear slid down my cheek at the admission. Tucking my head under his chin, I tried to move closer to him while hiding my embarrassment over my continuing struggles.

He kissed my forehead and gave me a gentle squeeze. "It's normal, Steph. I think you're dealing with a little extra anxiety this week too and so your mind is just trying to deal with it all. I'm glad to know that even in your dreams you run to me for safety."

Letting out a deep breath, I tried to shake off my nightmare as I snuggled into him more. I was dealing with more anxiety this week. I'd made the decision with the support of Dr. Lewis and my friends to go to The BlueMoon tonight. It'd been six months since I was attacked there and it felt necessary to remember that it wasn't the place that hurt me and that in order to truly let go of the remaining fear, I had to face down the bar where my nightmare started.

Tank was apprehensive about the decision but supported me and let me know in no uncertain terms that he was going along. In the end, most of RangeMan wanted to come along tonight as well. Most of the Merry Men had figured out exactly what had happened to me. Their natural intuitive natures and experience meant that there was no secret-keeping. However, none of them ever pushed me to share details about the rape. They supported me and made sure I had whatever security and space I needed. If anything, they had all become even more protective of me and as I slowly recovered I had to get them used to allowing me more contact with the outside world.

Kissing Tank's chin, I relaxed my hold and sat back a little to look at him. "I suppose I woke you, too." It was Saturday and while he was always awake before me, he had a late night last night and I hated that my nightmares meant lack of sleep for him too.

"I was already up, just kinda lazing around when the nightmare started." His large hands cupped my cheeks before he placed a quick kiss to my nose. "I'll start the coffee." I watched as he pulled a sweatshirt over his bare chest before leaving me alone in the bedroom.

Slipping some sweatpants on underneath Tank's t-shirt, I made my way to the bathroom. I stood in front of the shower for a few minutes debating about whether or not I should climb in. I felt dirty, but I knew it was just an after effect of the nightmare and that the anxiety would lessen if I would just sit with it for a minute. Washing my hands, I did my best to shake off my anxiety and went to the kitchen.

Tank noticed my rubbing hands and anxiety immediately. He gave me a small smile and pulled me into his chest, kissing the top of my head. "I wish I could ease those nightmares for you, Little Girl."

I smiled into his chest and rubbed his back. "I'll be okay."

"We can cancel tonight, you know, do it another day." His voice was hesitant and I know he was warring with trying not to smother me and trying to protect me at all costs at the same time.

Stepping back, I took his hands in mine and looked into his dark chocolate eyes. "I need to do it tonight, it's time. Yes, I'm anxious and afraid but you'll be there along with most of RangeMan, I'll be safe."

He chuckled and nodded. We sat at the table and drank our coffee, looking at the morning paper. I watched him for a few minutes when a nagging question worked its way through my brain and wouldn't be denied. "Can I ask you a question, Pierre?"

Looking up from his paper, his eyes met mine, but his eyebrows furrowed in concern. "Of course, Steph. You should know that you can ask me anything, anytime."

I knew that. He never put me or my questions aside, but neither of us talked about our feelings much. "How do you feel about going to The BlueMoon tonight?"

"I have mixed feelings." He frowned but took my hand in his giving it a gentle squeeze. "I'm proud of you because you're so very determined to recover from what happened. Your strength never ceases to amaze me." He smiled at his compliments of me and I could feel myself blushing, not feeling worthy of how he saw me.

He let out a deep breath and his face changed, his eyes grew stormy. "Going there tonight sickens me though, only because it reminds me of how much you were hurt and that I didn't protect you from that trauma."

"There's no way you could have known or protected me, Tank." I knew he carried some burden and guilt because of my attack, but I didn't want that. I didn't blame him at all.

"Rationally, I know that Steph. Emotionally, I struggle with how you were hurt and how I wasn't there when you needed me. If I had done more digging I may have seen how Robbins would be dangerous to you. "

"But you were there. You've been here with me for months. As for Robbins, there was no way to know about his sick habits, I don't blame you in anyway. Besides, if you had done a ton of digging I'd have been pissed and you know it." He chuckled seeing the truth behind my statements.

I moved to kneel in front of his chair, my hands resting on his thighs. "It's been because of your strength holding me up all these months that I'm even able to get out of bed let alone function at a reasonably normal level. You're always there when I need you."

His hand cupped my face, his thumb caressing my cheek. "I love you, Stephanie. There's nothing I won't do for you and I'm trying to let go of my guilt."

Leaning into his hand, I closed my eyes. "I love you, too. I suppose we both have a little recovering to do yet."

"We'll do it together, how's that sound?"

I giggled and squeezed the hand on my cheek. "It's a deal."

The day was spent doing a whole lot of avoiding and denial. We kept ourselves busy with normal domestic cleaning that all weekends seem to need. After dinner, Tank let me shower first knowing that it would take me longer to get ready.

He was dressed and ready long before I had my hair dry and mascara applied. I dressed in a denim skirt and red blouse. My clothing had taken a definite turn towards the more conservative end of fashion since the rape. I knew that my clothing didn't cause my attack, didn't give my rapist a reason to hurt me, but still it had changed how I dressed and I felt the need to cover up more than ever before.

I was smoothing my skirt out in front of the mirror, my hands nervously running over my clothing. Tank appeared behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me into him. "You are gorgeous. I'll be with you the whole time." He kissed my shoulder and looked at me in the mirror again.

Leaning my back into his chest, I nodded. "I couldn't do it if you weren't." It was the truth. While I was determined to do this, his support was what gave me the necessary strength.

We made the drive to the bar in silence. I chewed on my lip the entire way. Tank kept my hand in his on his thigh, his thumb occasionally rubbing mine passing on a little comfort and security.

When Tank pulled into the parking lot, my hands began to wring. I wanted to do this, but the nervousness was threatening to overwhelm me. Tank got out and came to my side opening the door and pulling me into him the second I had my belt off. His hands ran gentle passes up and down my spine as he whispered into my ear. "We don't have to stay any longer than you want, Little Girl. I'm here, most of RangeMan is here no harm will come to you, I promise."

I nodded into his chest, my fingers grasping as his side while I tried to take in some deep calming breaths. "I want to do this, I just need a minute."

"Take all the time you need, Steph." He kept me tight against him but I felt his head shaking. I figured he was waving off one of our friends wanting to offer me some support.

Leaning back from his chest, I took one of his massive hands in mine and let out my breath. "Okay, let's do this."

He smiled and kissed my forehead, helping me down from the seat. "You're amazing, Stephanie."

Walking through the parking lot I saw it was mostly full of black vehicles, including Ranger's Porsche and I wondered if the Merry Men had left any room inside for regular patrons. Stepping inside the loud bar, I saw it was full of strangers, but also friends. Joe was here with his girlfriend, Connie, MaryLou, Lula, Ranger, and most of the Merry Men with their dates. Their support was endearing and overwhelming. I wrapped my arm around Tank's waist as he steered us towards a table with the group.

After I took a seat between Tank and Bobby, Les approached first. His green eyes twinkled before he leaned down to kiss my forehead. "What can I get you to drink, Beautiful?"

"Just a club soda with lime." I hadn't had any alcohol since the attack and didn't think I could handle getting tipsy at the bar where my nightmare started.

Les nodded and ran off to the bar when Tank leaned down to whisper in my ear. "You can drink Steph, I won't let you out of my sight."

"I know, but I just want to remember this night sober, know that I stood up to my own nightmare without chemical help."

He kissed my temple pulling me into his side. "Again, you're amazing."

It took me a little while but I eventually relaxed, dancing with my friends even laughing. All of it helped me release the anxiety and allowed me to feel like I was moving on, like something of great significance was happening by staring down the horrible memory that started here.

Dancing a slow number with Tank, I started to feel exhausted as the club sodas worked through my bladder. While I was having fun in the bar, the thought of going to the ladies room and the hallway where Mathis grabbed me was more frightening that I had imagined. I tensed in Tank's arms, something he, of course, picked up on immediately.

"What's wrong?" He held me close but I felt his muscles tense up and knew without looking at his face that he wore a worried expression.

"I need to use the restroom and I'm terrified of going back there. He grabbed me in that hallway." My words were coming fast as I grew more overwhelmed.

"I'll go with you and stand outside the door." He placed a kiss on the top of my head.

Letting go of my hold on him, I met his eyes and nodded. He held my hand and gave it a gentle squeeze before letting me walk into the restroom alone. Washing my hands, I met my own eyes in the mirror and realized that I was doing better than okay. Despite a few moments of anxiety, this night was a success and I felt like because of it I would have less nightmares going forward.

True to his word, Tank was waiting right outside the door for me. I took his hand as my eyes surveyed the hall and back door where I was grabbed and pulled outside. Tank watched me but didn't speak as my mind raced with memories. "He grabbed me here and dragged me out that back door."

Tank's free hand cupped my cheek as his eyes raced through emotions of anger, hurt, and concern. "Want to walk back there and come back in the front? I'll be with you, no one will hurt you."

He was giving me another opportunity to release my fear and while I could tell that he was anguished over what had happened, he also knew what I needed to heal. I nodded and let him lead me towards the door. My hands shook, but I was also filled with excitement as we walked through the parking lot and back inside the bar. In that simple walk, I felt the last hold Mathis had on my memory being released.

I wasn't naive enough to believe there wouldn't be any struggles as I continued to heal, but I knew that because of tonight's activities and Tank's amazing presence at my side that I was indeed on the road to recovery. It was because of Tank's unending tenderness towards me and the rage he unleashed on the men that victimized me that gave me freedom from a nightmare and a promise of a loving future.

The End

Thanks to everyone who read, commented on, and supported me and this story. I appreciate all of your kind words so very much!