I would never be the same again

I just stared. I looked into the bathroom mirror and just… stared. The door was locked and everyone was asleep, so no one should bother me. When it first happened I was shocked, but I didn't really think about it much, and didn't freak out as much as I would if my friends weren't there. But now I couldn't help but to just stare at my new form as I thought of just how much I was forever changed.

My once solid black hair was a ghostly white, my skin oddly enough looked more tan. Despite the whole thing where ghosts were supposed to be pale. It was my eyes though that I found the most interesting. They had evolved from my cool, breezy, almost sky blue eyes to a vibrant green, silently glowing, or brightly depending on if I am angry… or simply want them to.

I just stared at every small part of me to see what was different, or if I could even recognize myself. Honestly if I didn't know it was me, I wouldn't even think twice about the kid staring back at me in the mirror. Just a ghost, I would think and leave it at that. Suddenly something occurred to me, a ghost, ghosts are dead. Does that mean I will never die? Can I die? Will I ever age from the way I am now?

The green eyes in the mirror glowed slightly back at me as they widened little by little with my every question. I stepped back to the wall and slid down until I was sitting on the floor. I pulled up my knees and rested my arms on top of them as I just stared ahead at nothing. It wasn't that I wanted to die; no I'm not nearly emo enough for that, but to not know if I could?

As I thought more on it immortality didn't seem so great. Would I outlive my mom? My dad? My sister? Friends? And what if one day I had children, would I have to watch them die too? I pulled my knees closer to me as a single tear rolled down my cheek. God, I hope I don't live forever.

What about aging though too? Even If I'm lucky enough not to outlive everyone I know, what if I can only die in some tragic, violent way? If I don't age, how long till someone notices? Two years? Four? Would I have to move every couple of years, and lie about my age? I buried my head into my arms and cried silent tears of fear, loss, and anger.

I had lost my life when I went in that portal, one way or another. Even if it's just the ghost powers, my old life was dead. I would never be the same again. So I cried for the loss of my life, that no one may ever realize is gone. The tears of anger were mostly directed at the unfairness of it all. It was just one mistake, one foolish, childish mistake… and I would pay for it the rest of my life.

That's where the rest of the angry went, at myself for being so stupid, just walking into the portal like that. Even after my mom had told me repeatedly how dangerous it could be. Part of my anger was at Sam for pushing me into it, but that was barely there, I knew it wasn't her fault. I could have just said no, but… I was curious too.

It was the fear though that I felt the most, the reason why most my tears fell. I was truly afraid. I was afraid of the unknown, of what the future brought for me now. Of all the questions I couldn't answer. Of what would happen to me. Of what my parents, ghost hunters would think of me, or do to me. The image of a white table and needles made me cringe and I held myself into an even tighter ball, trying to reassure myself my parents would never do that to me.

However even as I calmed the doubt remained. I wiped my tears for a few minutes and stood up slowly. Seeing myself in the mirror again I imaged myself the way I used to be and a blue ring formed around me, splitting into two, one went up while the other went down and soon I looked human, as normal as everyone else.

My face was a little pink so I rinsed it in the sink, the cool water felt wonderful, but I stood up and dried myself before it could drip on my shirt. Feeling a little better I took a deep breath and pushed all my worries away, for now. I could do nothing about any of it now, so tomorrow I will go to school, act like everything is fine, and that nothing has changed, even with my friends.

Not that I didn't trust my friends, no they were taking everything quiet well, its just—it's not like they can do anything about any of it either. And I don't want to cry or whine in front of them. I don't want to worry them or seem pathetic. I listened for a moment to hear anyone awake before quietly opening the bathroom door and going back to my room.

I laid down and pulled the covers up to my chest, but kept my eyes open. A thought that wouldn't leave me alone prompted me to get back up after a few minutes. Moving quietly, even in my own room, so I didn't wake anyone I moved to a smaller round face mirror I had on my desk. Holding it up I take a deep breath to calm myself.

After all I am human right now; there is no way this is going to work. With that thought I concentrated on the reflection of my eyes in the mirror, nothing happened. And I'm relieved until I have another idea, after all I can't be truly relieved until I'm sure. So I look back into the mirror at my eyes and think of something that makes me angry.

I almost dropped the mirror in surprise when it works. I was hoping it wouldn't, that when I look like this I am just as normal as I look, but… the proof had stared back at me. Well glared, glowing, green, ghostly eyes had looked back into me. And I sunk back into my bed, thinking even like this… in the human form I had looked like before the accident… I wasn't normal.

AND CUT!

First Danny Phantom fic so be nice ;P And REVIEW! :D