Summary: Here's a better summary:
Giles discovers news of a hidden ruin somewhere in Kansas, but alas, the only person who can go with Buffy is Spike. This is the story of their trip together and how they overcome the truth of what awaits for them there. This is set in an AU season 5. I use season 5 a lot because it is the easiest to mess with and change to my heart's desire.

Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine, all belong to the wonderful folks who created the Buffyverse.

A/N: Was suddenly struck with the thought of how funny Spike and Buffy would be stuck in a car on a long trip together. I've already started the second chapter, so an update will be done pretty soon. Would love reviews, they make me want to keep writing :)

"Oh no," Buffy was gaping at Giles, an incredulous look on her face. Spike was across the room smirking at her typical reaction to anything that involved him. "I am NOT going on a road trip with him," she said, pointing accusingly at the vampire making himself at home in Buffy's house. He was lounging on the couch in Buffy's living room while Buffy was up and pacing about the room and Giles was standing awkwardly, hoping he could get his Slayer to agree to go. Buffy still had her jaw hung open at Giles telling her what had to be done.

"Close your mouth, Slayer, its rude," Spike jokingly chastised her as he leaned back, stretching across the couch. He was getting way too much enjoyment from Buffy's obvious distaste. Earlier that night, Giles had informed them all of some hidden temple of sorts in Kansas. Willow and Tara had classes, Dawn had school, Xander had work, and Anya and Giles had to run the Magic Shop, so Spike was the only option left to accompany her. It was too dangerous to allow Buffy to go alone. She was going to argue this decision as much as possible apparently.

Ignoring Spike's comment, Buffy looked at her Watcher, practically begging him to come up with a better solution. How dangerous could this trip be? Giles took off his glasses and began cleaning them even though they were already pristine. He didn't want to see Buffy scowling at him, it made sticking her with Spike that much harder.

"Look, Buffy I know how much you don't like this, but you've got Slayer duties. In the wrong hands, the artifact within this temple could destroy the world. I need you to retrieve it so I can find a way to destroy it or so Willow, Tara and I can cast a spell to keep evil from touching it. Spike is the only one who can accompany you."

"But I'm the Slayer, I don't need any help! And Spike can't travel during the day, and I can't drive!"

"This artifact corrupts all who touch it, Spike being the demon that he is, cannot be corrupted by its magicks since he is already a thing born from malevolence," Giles explained to a baffled Buffy. Spike snorted and decided to add into the conversation going on between the two.

"Aw thanks Rupert, didn't know you thought so highly of me," this comment elicited an eye roll from Buffy, but Spike continued, mostly speaking to Buffy. "My windows are sun-proof for the most part, so no worries of the designated driver bursting into flames, and by the by, you won't be even close to getting behind the wheel, pet, especially since you failed the driving test so many times." Spike teased her, even though he wasn't one to obey traffic laws either. He was looking forward to this road trip; he'd enjoy giving Buffy hell the whole time.

"You see this Giles? I cannot deal with him for an hour, let alone how long it takes to get to Kansas!" Buffy complained. Being the Slayer did not make her able to put up with Spike in close range. She didn't even like patrolling with him. He was annoying, made fun of her, and talked about music that went out of style about the same time his hair did. Just because it was cool in the 80's doesn't mean it was cool now.

"Er, well it's about a 25 hour drive with no stops, so probably over a day trip, but you need to do this. I'm afraid I have to put my foot down. Spike may not make for good traveling company, but he can handle himself in a fight, and should be clever enough to help you figure out the traps that are most assuredly in abundance in the ruins. So please, go pack and you'll be on your way," Giles was just going to have to deal with a huffy Slayer. As expected, Buffy sent a quick glare Spike's way and then stomped up the stairs to pack for their trip.

"Moody isn't she? " Spike commented, his small bag of extra clothes near his feet. He just had another black t-shirt and a pair of black jeans identical to the ones he was wearing. He had a toothbrush and toothpaste too, just in case. Giles sighed and sank into a nearby chair. Buffy was certainly a handful, any other Watcher would have had a stroke by now.

"Just please don't antagonize her. Believe me, I don't want to hear about how annoying you are on a daily basis," Giles commented. He certainly didn't like Spike, but he was the only hope they had. Spike nodded, and then was struck with a thought.

"Wait, Buffy talks about me, does she?" Spike asked, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his legs. He liked Buffy, of course not something he'd ever admit to, but he did. He dreamed about her on a nightly basis, and even though he enjoyed tormenting her, it was only because he knew she would accept nothing more. God, how he wanted her, but he knew nothing would come of it, so he'd take what he could get.

"Well yes, but I wouldn't let it go straight to your head. It's mostly complaining about how annoying you are, how much she hates working with you, etc." Giles glanced up when he heard a loud thump coming from upstairs, followed by a dragging sound. It sounded like something very heavy. The sound then started on the stairs. Both Spike and Giles got up to see what Buffy was doing. They glanced up and Buffy was attempting to lug a giant suitcase down the stairs. She looked at them exasperated, and after a few seconds rolled her eyes.

"A little help would be nice. Even Slayer powers can't handle this," Giles backed up, making sure Spike got the idea that he was the one stuck with her, so he had to help her. Spike clomped up the stairs, yanked the suitcase from Buffy, and tossed it down the rest of the way. She gaped at him, completely horrified, before she repeatedly hit him in the chest.

"What…is…wrong…with…YOU!" She yelled with each paused accentuated by a punch. Spike glared at her and got off the stairs, picking up her suitcase to set it right side up.

"What's wrong with me? Look at all the crap you packed! Why do you need all this? It's only one bloody day!"

"Well you didn't have to throw it down the stairs! What if something was breakable!"

"Then now it's all broken and in convenient little pieces."

"Giles!" Buffy yelled. She was fed up with Spike and they hadn't even left yet. Giles was fed up with both of them and shooed them out of Buffy's house. The sooner they were gone, the quieter it would be. Giles loved Buffy like a daughter, but when you put her and Spike together in the same room, it was just bad. If the trouble the artifact could cause wasn't on an apocalyptic scale, then he wouldn't have wanted to put the two in the same vehicle together. Of course, if Buffy staked Spike sometime on their trip, he wouldn't have to hear them bicker or complain about each other.

As Giles shut the door on the two, calling out farewells, he could hear their voices traveling through the door even as they walked into the driveway. Giles sighed, relieved they were gone. Only when the engine of Spike's car fired up did Giles go into the kitchen to make up some tea. He felt he deserved it. Just thinking about how the road trip was going to go filled him with unease. Spike and Buffy were two of the most argumentative people Rupert knew, sticking them in a car together was a recipe for disaster.