Heartbreak

Chapter 1

The days since she left were all the same. He woke up, went to his classes at the University, came home to his shabby apartment, sat in front of the television, take his pills, and fell asleep, dreaming of her. Dreaming of the biggest mistake he d made in his pathetic life.

Hisao Nakai had given up on a lot of things in the last year of his young life. He d given up any shred of a normal school life after his heart attack, going to Yamaku Academy to finish his schooling. There he d met a number of interesting people, making a number of friends. He d even fallen in love with one Lilly Satou. He d ended up giving her up, too. As a result of this, he d given up on himself. The only reason he went to the University now was to occupy his time.

It had been six months since Lilly left for Inverness, Scotland at the behest of her father; She d broken off her relationship with Hsiao a few days beforehand, effectively rendering him a useless shell.

Lilly had promised that she would keep in touch with him, but Hisao put an end to that a month after her departure, by beginning to ignore her calls, and eventually blocking her number. He knew that if they d kept in contact it would be hazardous for his health. Just thinking of her after she left made his heart race. Hearing her voice when she d called the first few times had driven his heart to stop, skip a beat, or spasm. His heart couldn t take the strain, emotionally, nor physically.

Hanako had called a few times during her travels, and Hisao ignored her as well, mostly. She d been Lilly s best friend, and one of his, and she reminded him of everything the trio had done together. The tea, getting drunk at Hanako s birthday party thanks to Akira s carelessly buying alcohol for minors, the trip to Hokkaido, they d all been perfect. It was on that trip that Lilly had professed her love for him, and where they d made love the first time He wanted to purge everything that reminded him of Lilly from his life, even though the idea of that hurt him at the core.

The only people he d remained in contact with after graduation had been Emi, Misha, and he occasionally exchanged e-mails with Mutou regarding the University. Misha, upon instruction, wasn t to bring up Shizune, due to her relation to Lilly. She d initially protested, saying that "Shiichan hates Lilly~!" , but Hisao had explained that any connection with Lilly would be problematic to his health, which wasn t entirely true, as Shizune hadn t been part of any really memorable events in his and Lilly s relationship.

Hisao awoke to the blaring noise of his alarm clock, and sat up in bed, groaning. He swallowed his daily handful of pills after rubbing the sleep from his eyes. They went down easily. A year of the same medication had proved easier to deal with than he d initially thought, and he d become quite adept in taking the lot of them without a chaser.

Walking into his kitchen, Hisao started a pot of coffee, turning on the T.V. as he did so. "...the culprit has been identified as nineteen year old Kenji Setou. The officer s funeral will be next Tuesday in Kyoto." The reporter onscreen cleared her throat, continuing on another subject.

Hisao froze. Kenji? He half-yelled. It wasn t completely unexpected that Kenji would end up in jail one day, this Hisao knew, but he never expected the reason to be capital murder. He half expected what came next. His cell phone rang. "Hello?" he answered.

"Yes sir, this is Tokyo PD, with one Kenji Setou here wanting to use his phone call on you. Do you know this person?"

Hisao could make out Kenji s voice in the background. "Of course he knows me!" Kenji yelled.

"Sir?" the officer said.

Hisao couldn t bring himself to say it. He didn t want to get involved. "No. No, I don t know who he is."

"Says he doesn t know you, Setou." the officer said to Kenji.

The last thing Hisao heard before he hung up was Kenji, screaming. "I'll get you back one day, Nakai! We'll get even!"

The threat meant nothing to him. Kenji would be placed in a maximum security prison before and after his trial. He couldn t make good on any threat.

Could he?

Hisao shook the thought away, pouring a hot cup of coffee, and drinking it black. He yelped, dropping the hot mug to the tile floor. "Too hot!" he mouthed, sticking his face under the sink faucet and turning it on. That too, was hot. ACK! he groaned, stumbling backwards. He slipped on the now wet kitchen floor, falling back, subsequently slamming his head into the breakfast table.

He blacked out.

She d been crying for a while now, Hisao noticed as Lilly pressed her face into his shoulder as they embraced. "I love you, Hisao! Don t ever leave!" She sobbed uncontrollably into his neck.

"Lilly..." Hisao tried to respond. "It s okay. I m here." He stroked her beautiful blonde hair, holding her tightly. "I'll always be here for you."

Hisao came to to hear his cell phone ringing. Reaching into his pocket, he felt a sharp pain in the back of his head, and remembered how he d gotten himself in his current situation. "Hello?" he said tiredly, not bothering to check caller I.D.

"Hey, Hisao."

That voice.

"Akira..." Hisao s head no longer hurt. He was back to full awareness as the sound of his ex-girlfriend's older sister came through the receiver.

"Don t sound too happy to hear from an old pal after six months." Akira said lightly.

"What do you want?" Hisao was in no mood for chat. He hadn't expected Akira to ever call him after that day in the park. He thought that she would ve known about his unwillingness to speak to Lilly, and taken a hint.

"Look, Hisao, I didn t call you as a favor to Lilly. Akira s tone was serious. In fact, she told me specifically to call everybody but you."

"You haven t said why you called, Akira. If that s all you want, then I m hanging up." Hisao made a move to close his phone.

"Stop."

There was something wrong.

"What is it?" Hisao s tone remained dry.

"Our father s sick, Hisao. He s not gonna last another month." Akira paused for a moment, maybe to think about what she wanted to say next. "And my sister s not taking it well She s been locked in her room for two days, Hisao."

"Call Hanako." Hisao said bitterly. Why should I care about Lilly s problems?

"Hisao, I-"

"Tell me that much, Akira!" Hisao yelled. "Tell me why she s my problem! Six months ago she said goodbye, and she left for Scotland with you! She's your sister! You fix her problems! I don t give a damn anymore!"

The outburst seemed to have shocked Akira. It s a few seconds before she responds. "...Hisao She loved you."

"And I loved her, Akira!"

"...I..."

"Shut up!" Hisao yelled, louder. "You're the reason she left! You should ve stayed here! She would ve stayed here if you had!" Tears started to flow down his cheeks.

"I'm sorry..." Akira said after a moment. "I really am. I know you two were in love I..."

"I dream about her every time I sleep, Akira." Hisao said, his tone even. "Do you know how hard it is to see her every time I shut my eyes? It's hell, Akira."

"Hisao I can t reach Hanako I know you two don t get along anymore, but I think you re the only one who can really get to her now." Akira sounded different than she did before.

Hisao lowered the phone for a few seconds, thinking.

Why should I do anything about this? She deserves it.
She left me, let her deal with it.
I... I love her.

"Okay..." Hisao said. quietly. "put her on."