Hi, I'm Kayla. This was just a bit of fun. I always wondered what would happen if the Penguins got someone sensible on their team.

The penguins stared at the computer screen.
"Kowalski," Skipper began.
"I know, I know." Kowalski replied hurriedly, clicking the mouse. "Ah yes, here it is."
"Well?" Skipper asked impatiently.
"Well, if I'm reading this correctly… it's a bunch of letters. Sorry Skipper, we're going to need help from Mason and Phil."
"Ri-ght," Skipper said, suspicion evident in his voice. "Rico, Private." They saluted. "Fetch us the higher mammals."
"But Skipper-" Private began, no doubt having some concern.
"Can it, soldier. This is serious intel that we need. Remember Manfredi and Johnson."
"Yes Skipper," Private said sadly.
"Good man. Now go." Private and Rico slid away through the window.
"Run me through it again Kowalski." Skipper commanded. Kowalski got out a clipboard.
"0800, Alice acting suspicious. A manager from a foreign zoo scoped out our habitat. He mentioned 'shipping penguins' and something about space issues."
"I always knew this was coming." Skipper said. "They're shipping us off! To some god forsaken place in who knows where."
"That theory does seem to collaborate with the facts," Kowalski said.
Suddenly Private and Rico returned with the chimpanzees.
"Got 'em Skipper," Private said cheerfully.
"I say, what is the meaning of this?" Mason asked.
"We need your expertise." Skipper said.
"Our expertise?" Mason asked.
"We want you to read something to us," Private explained.
"That's what I said!" Skipper protested. There was a pause.
"What do you need us to read?" Mason asked.
"This," Kowalski said, pointing at the computer file.
Phil leaned over and rapidly began signing.
"It appears to be a file on the zoo's penguins."
"We know that!" Skipper complained. "What does it say after that?" he paused, then became manic. "It's Hoboken, isn't it? Alice finally decided to get rid of us! I promised I'd never go back there." He shuddered.
Phil shook his head and signed.
"Phil says it's not that. In fact he…What do you mean the opposite?" More rapid signing. "Ah, Phil says you're getting a transfer into your habitat. You're getting a new roommate."