Hi and hello there, mortals! My name's Leo Valdez and I came up with 40 perks of being a demi-god, for those of you who aren't. I would like to thank Aguilita Cruz, who allowed me to use her profile to post this story, and R.E.D. The Oracle, for helping me make up more than just 10 perks. Now, keep in mind, it's not fair if you don't review, since I typed this up while everybody else played capture-the-flag.

1. NOBODY can diss our family.

2. If they diss Zeus, and they get a mouthful of lightning.

3. Diss Hermes, and their Internet slows down.

4. Diss Aphrodite, and they get a whole week of bad hair days.

5. And I mean, really bad hair days.

6. Our thighs are nice and muscular.

7. You know, from running.

8. Away from monsters.

9. Note the irony: They try to kill us, yet they give us great legs.

10. Owls seem a lot less creepy to us.

11. We know who to blame when a loved one dies.

12. Depressing, but true.

13. When you hang with us, there will be less awkward silences.

14. ADHD hardly lets us stay quiet long enough for awkward silences to set in.

15. And who likes awkward silences?

16. You get to climb a rock-climbing wall with lava pouring down the sides and rocks being chucked at you!

17. You have to admit, that is flippin' AWESOME!

18. While you are running from monsters you get to see a lot of monuments (had to add that in there for Annabeth).

19. Oh, AND we have Annabeth! That's a great perk!

20. Let's face it, that would suck if we didn't.

21. Because a lot of us would've been dead right now.

22. And who would want that?

23. Probably Kronos.

24. And Zeus.

25. And Hades.

26. And Ares.

27. And Gaea.

28. Athena should probably get added to the list.

29. Oh, and most Titans.

30. And and and. You get the point. Too many people want us dead.

31. Sorry to say, but it's the truth.

32. You get Demi-god dreams.

33. Which help you in quests.
34. Even though they get annoying. Believe me, they do.

35. I wonder why Demi-gods can't get dreams about flowers and chocolate bunnies?

36. I guess I will have to ask Morpheus about that.

37. It's probably because on quests you rarely ever run into flowers and chocolate bunnies.

38. You run into more evil things.

39. Because quests are not about finding people the best birthday presents.

40. Unless that has something to do with getting Hera her billionth year birthday present.

And there you have it! 40 Perks Of Being a Demi-god. Written by Yours Truly, Leo Valdez. Call me sometime.