Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. (siggghhh)
"Woah, you're hot. Are you gay?"
An irate brow rose with the sudden statement. There was a girl beside Sasuke who had been staring at him since he reached the bar an hour ago. This was the first time she had spoken to him.
The club was more crowded than usual tonight and Sasuke had to fit himself in tight bodies pressing him as he passed towards the bar. He hadn't want to come tonight, seeing he would rather get some sleep after their Finals but the blonde idiot who was entitled as his best friend had managed to convince him that alcohol and 'getting the pole out of his ass' would do him good. He needed to relax because hell was finally over.
Now, he was regretting it. He wondered why even agreed in the first place.
For free drinks, his mind supplied. He settled in ignoring the weird girl and returned to his drink.
"Hey! I was asking you a question—oh never mind. It's not like I don't know the answer to that already." She sighed and Sasuke almost felt relieved that she had stop talking after a pause but then she started yapping again. "I mean obviously you like the ones I like and—"
The raven-haired chose to tune out again. He really had no intention of acknowledging her or anyone for the matter tonight; especially a girl with bright pink hair and green eyes. She had weird looks and she was probably screwed in the head with those mismatched colors. He was busy thinking how he did with his Business in Math exam. He hadn't much got to review since the same idiot blonde who brought him here, had been cramming about a project he was supposed to pass the next day and he was making a racket about it instead of actually doing it.
"—Like I met this dude who was super pretty with red hair and I was so ready to jump him then and there when this tall blonde boy came behind him and tongued each other in front of me! Can you believe it? All the pretty guys are wasted because they all prefer thei—"
Sasuke scowled. Does this girl ever stop talking? She was so loud even with the music on maximum volume and why was she even talking to him? He was a stranger damn it! Didn't her mother teach not to talk to strangers? He had to get out of here and find Naruto.
"Teme!" Thank God. For once in his life, Naruto had become useful.
"Oh. Damn! I knew you were too good to be true!"" The pink-haired girl cursed. "Here's your boyfriend."
Sasuke hissed. "Not my boyfriend."
"Just with benefits, huh? One night stand? Don't worry. I'm not the type to judge—" The girl waved her hands in front of her and smiled innocently.
"No." He retorted, drinking his Bloody Mary in one shot. "We're nothing."
Apparently, the girl took it differently from what he meant and stuttered clumsily. "Oh. It's alright. I've had my share of unrequited love. Mostly with gays but I understand, no—"
"Sasuke! I was looking all over for you! I didn't bring you here so you could sulk here, you asshole!" Sasuke winced as he received Naruto's painful slap in the back. The idiot was grinning and he was sure he meant to do it painfully on purpose. He muttered a 'fuck you' while rubbing the sore spot he had been slapped. Naruto merely ignored him, slanged an arm around his friend's neck and raised a brow at the girl beside him.
"Oh, I see. While I was waiting for Kiba and the others, you were here busy snatching a girl so you can get laid. Good job, Sasu—"
The girl laughed and said way too innocently, "But he's gay."
Sasuke chokedon air and Naruto stared at the not-so-stranger but unfamiliar person with mouth parted in disbelief. Had he heard, right? Did she just say that Sasuke was—
Oh hell no.
The blonde quickly took his hands off the Uchiha and raised his palms away from his face. "No homo."
Sasuke rolled his eyes and glared at the girl before him and then grunted and moved past the stunned blonde. "I'm going home."
"But Sasuke," Naruto protested. "You didn't tell me you were—you were gay!" He said it a little too loudly for Sasuke's liking and several heads turned in their direction. Sasuke seethed and quietly planned Naruto's castration.
"I'm not." He turned and grabbed the girl's arm and dragged her out of the room. What the hell was wrong with this? Why was she pushing this idea of hers that he was gay?
When he was sure no one was around, he let go of the girl, scowl etched in his face. His eyes narrowed at her blushing face. Was she a fan girl? Sasuke hoped she was not. "Who are you and what do you want?"
"What do you mean what do I want? You're the one who suddenly dragged me here and now you're asking me? What's your problem?"
As if not hearing her, Sasuke crossed his arms. "Why do you insist that I am a homosexual?"
"Well, aren't you?" The girl huffed and glared back. He was a head taller than her so she was looking up at him with those big bright jaded eyes. Not backing down with a challenge, Sasuke glared back. Now with the good lighting, he noted that she has pretty eyes and a cute face. Small but good enough. Sighing in defeat, the girl turned away and muttered, "You look like the type anyway."
"Hn?"
"Oh you know! Prettier than a girl, popular like a pop star can turn someone's legs into jelly—those type! I've met a lot of your type. Remember the red head I told you before? Sasori? He was pretty and popular and he did more than just turn my legs into jelly… he turned out to be gay. My biology teacher from high school? Orochimaru? He was pretty with long black hair and stuff but turns out he's into little boys. Boom! Pedo gay!" She waved her arms around in aggravated explanation and it took Sasuke all his patience to grab and stop her from flailing like a fan girl. She was seriously annoying.
Sasuke thought about her logic about gays. It was stupid and improbable and to be honest, it seemed like the problem was her and not them. She had bad luck with guys, he concluded.
As if reading his thoughts, she frowned. "It's not my fault! Either all the hot guys are taken or he likes the same gender. It's your fault!"
And now she dared to blame him? Yes, she was really nuts. And he was probably feeding her more theories by saying, "I'm not gay."
"Right. And I'm lady Gaga."
"I'm. Not. Gay." He said again but with more conviction.
"Prove it."
This was where Sasuke found himself grabbing the back of the unknown girl's head, forcing her against the wall and attacking her straight at her lips. She gasped in surprised but a moment later, she found herself kissing him ferociously back. Sasuke didn't know where it was from—alcohol, proving her she was wrong about him—but he found himself liking that she thought of him as a gay before she had kissed him. Because if she hadn't, they probably wouldn't have get married.
The only problem was how they would tell their children how they met.
Author's Note: Sakura really likes questioning Sasuke's sexuality.