Title: Shounen-ai and Interspecies Relations

Author: Stolen Childe

Disclaimer: I don't own Sam, Dean or Castiel, I'm just playing with them.

Rating: PG-13

Content/Warnings: awkward parent-child talks, humour, slash, kid!fic, wry!Castiel, untrusting!father!Dean, voice-of-reason!Sam, snarky!John T., language

Pairing/Characters: Dean/Castiel, Sam, John Tabris(child OC)

Word Count: 2200+

Summary: Dean can't be perfect all the time, but luckily he has a way too smart kid, a brother and an angel to pick up the slack for him.

Author's Notes: I noticed that I've been writing Dean as an exemplar of good parenting and realized that I can have some fun with his other sides too. So here we have a fic that started with suspicious!Dean but ended with awkward kitchen table talks. Please enjoy! Also, I apologize in advance for any possible mistranslations.

Sorry this is posted so late!

John's Age: 14

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Shounen-ai and Interspecies Relations

"Dean, Dean!" Sam called after his brother as he chased him through the house. "Dean, come on Man…"

"He's hiding something from me, I know it," Dean gritted out as he pushed his sons' bedroom door open.

"Dean this is like a major invasion of privacy here, we're talking off the scale," Sam tried.

"Shut it Sammy," Dean snapped, and began rifling through his son's dirty laundry.

"Dean, come on, what did you hide from Dad when you were fourteen?"

Dean turned around, pointing a finger at his brother, "Not the same thing."

"Exactly the same thing."

"Come on, all I hid was a couple old copies of Busty Asian Beauties that I stole from the 7-11 that one time, this is something big. I feel it in my bones Sammy," Dean glared, tackling the sock drawer.

Sam stood awkwardly in the middle of his nephews' room, staring at the neatly organized side that belonged to four-year-old Jasper and the chaotic mess (made only that much more chaotic by Dean) that belonged to John. Sam was thinking it was time for a bigger house. Fourteen was too old to be sharing with your baby brother. Especially if John really was hiding something. Sam was about to open his mouth to voice his concerns but Dean interrupted.

"Cas! Cas! Get your feathery ass down here! Oh Castiel who art fucking off, get hereth, noweth…. Pleaseth," Dean shouted at the ceiling. Sam winced. He wondered if Castiel would still smite Dean for being an irreverent dick even with the whole profound bond thing. Sam really wouldn't blame Cas if he did.

"Hello Dean," Castiel drawled, he was leaning with his arms crossed in John's doorway, dressed casually in jeans and a t-shirt. "I've been home for an hour."

Dean blushed, "Sorry, I just got in."

"Why exactly are you systematically demolishing our sons' room, may I ask?" Castiel asked, pushing away from the doorway and idly flipping through some dislodged papers that he scooped off the floor.

Dean came over and stood in Castiel's face, "He's hiding something." Castiel didn't flinch or pull back, just looked coolly into Dean's fevered eyes. Sam always wondered how they could hold a conversation standing so close, whispered sweet nothings were one thing, but Dean and Cas would just talk an inch away from each other's noses.

Castiel just quirked an eyebrow, "I may be a little out of touch with humanity still, but isn't that what teenagers do? I imagine if he went through all the trouble of hiding something, he wants it to remain hidden."

"So what?" Dean snapped. "Go read his mind or whatever, find out what it is."

"Dean, I refuse to read our child's thoughts to satisfy one of your completely irrational whims. That is an immense invasion of privacy, which I have no inclination to participate in," Castiel glared. They were still practically nose-to-nose and Sam was feeling awkward on their behalf. Especially because he would never want to be on the end of the look Castiel was giving Dean. Dean seemed perfectly unfazed. Sam could only shake his head.

"Caaass," Dean whined. Yes, Dean Winchester, whined. Sam snorted, it went unnoticed.

"No," Castiel's tone brooked no argument. "Now, I hope you have a good excuse prepared."

"What? Why would I—" Before Dean could finish the question the front door shut with a gentle bang and John's voice drifted down the hallway.

"Dad, Pop? Uncle Sam?" Footsteps approached and John was in his room a moment after, giving the three men a blank look.

"Ah… hey guys…" John said. "Weird place to have a party, but I'm down. Something I should know about?"

"We should ask you the same thing," Dean demanded suddenly, rounding on his son.

"No excuse then," Castiel said idly.

"And when exactly did this become a 'we' endeavour?" Sam added.

John narrowed his eyes, Winchester fierceness climbing through, "What are you talking about?"

"Don't you dare lie to me John Tabris Winchester, you've been hiding something and it ends now," Dean almost but not quite shouted.

"Well, at least he dropped the 'we,'" Castiel remarked. Sam snorted.

"Hiding something? What do you mean hiding something? And how the hell am I supposed to hide anything even if I want to? I have a four year old brother under my feet all day, a seven year old cousin who thinks that why, what and how are the only words in the English language, a paranoid dad and freakin' angel father who reads my damn thoughts!" John huffed.

"I don't on purpose," Castiel offered.

"Shut up Cas/Pop!" was snapped by father and son. Castiel looked understandably affronted and Sam wondered if infanticide was a big of a sin with angels as it was with humans because John was looking a little bit toasty. Dean didn't look much better… at least the couch wouldn't be lonely tonight.

"Hey! You watch your tone Mister, don't you talk to your father like that," Dean scolded.

John rolled his eyes, "Whatever. Look, just tell me what you think I'm hiding so I can pretend you're right and then we can continue on with our night. I'm so over this family drama, it's not even funny."

"You're grounded!" Dean shouted.

"Oh woe is me, I'll just sit all by myself in my room with my laptop, phone and music," John rolled his eyes again and slumped over to his bed, flopping down on it and very purposely turning on his iPod. Dean glared at his son, snatched the phone out of his hands, the iPod from the dock and the laptop off the desk before storming out of the room.

John sat up fully on the bed, "Hey!"

"Grounded!" Dean called back. John threw himself back on the bed and glared at the ceiling.

Castiel sighed, "I'll talk to him John."

"Whatever," John muttered.

Castiel glared then too, "Hey, I was on your side this entire time, but I'm not too certain I'm appreciating this sudden change in attitude. Maybe you do need some quiet time. I've half a mind to send you up to seek Revelation."

John blanched, and shook his head rapidly, "No! Papa please! I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I just… he makes me so angry sometimes! I shouldn't have taken it out on you. I'm sorry! I'll be good."

Castiel chuckled, "All right. I'll see what I can do." John nodded sheepishly. Sam flashed John a sympathetic smile as he left the room. He had had his fair share of Dean induced punishments. Seeing a kindred spirit, John managed to give his uncle a smile in return.

"Seek Revelation? Really? That's all it takes?" Sam asked a little enviously as he followed Castiel down the hallway. He still hadn't managed to figure out what would quell his impetuous daughter. That girl was all attitude and swagger with an angel's face. Sam was in so much trouble when she was a teenager. Good thing he kept a good old Winchester rifle in the closet.

Castiel chuckled, "It can be a little… shall we say monotonous, for an angel who is just as much a human. Humans are not accustomed to the… stillness."

"So basically he gets bored out of his mind," Sam translated.

"Yes. That is probably the most apt description of his reaction to the task," Castiel nodded, a small smirk quirking his lips.

"Jeeze, the kid doesn't even visit any porn sites," Dean had John's laptop open on the kitchen table in front of him, glaring at the screen as he clicked through window after window. "I don't think he's my son, I should do a DNA test."

Castiel rolled his eyes, "Yes that makes perfect sense."

"Oh! Wait! What's this? Hmm… maybe he just has discerning taste…" Dean mused opening one particular website that Google informed him was the most active. The screen was filled with page after page of on-line Japanese comics that Sam knew to be called Manga. Each Manga read was filled with very attractive boys doing chaste things like holding hands, or kissing or giving each other long searching glances. Sam wondered if it would freak John out if he learned that was pretty well his parent's relationship for the first couple years of it. With a twitch of an only slightlyevil grin, Sam vowed to find out.

"Shounen-ai no kawaii desu," Dean read, mangling the foreign words.

Castiel said the phrase with the proper accent and pronunciation before translating, "Cute Boy Love."

Dean blinked, "Seriously?"

"Yes," Castiel answered. "I also believe you just found out what it is you thought our son was hiding."

"Ah… that doesn't even make any sense…" Dean blinked. "For all intents and purposes, we're gay."

"Astute observation," Castiel said dryly.

Dean rolled his eyes, "I mean you're actually a multidimensional being of celestial intent which is technically genderless… I'm not technically gay. I just like you. "

"Gee thanks," Castiel replied.

"Though the you wearing a dude thing, makes it seem as if we're gay," Dean continued.

"Yes Dean, I got it," Castiel said impatiently. Sam was watching everything with an amused smile on his lips.

"My point," Dean bit out, "is that he shouldn't be afraid or feel like he has to hide if he like guys, 'cause we can't judge… Like at all."

"Maybe…" Sam ventured, "he's straight and doesn't want to disappoint you so he's looking at these to make himself like boys."

"Sam, I reiterate, that doesn't even make sense," Dean replied, enunciating carefully.

"Dean, he's fourteen," Sam retorted. "It doesn't have to make sense, he's a big ball of angst and hormones right now, logic doesn't really factor into the equation."

"Or maybe I just like the art and the storylines."

All three men turned as one to the entranceway of the kitchen where John was standing awkwardly, playing with his nails.

John looked up, "I wasn't hiding it… and yeah, maybe it's a little bit like Uncle Sam said, but I'm not hiding it. I just… I just don't understand it. I mean there's this one guy in my class, his name is Jack and I really like him… Like really. But there's also this cute girl in English and my heart goes real fast when I look at her or when she reads the poems… So I… I dunno. It's weird. They said in Health that liking boys or liking girls is a genetic thing, so when I started noticing Jack… no big deal, right? But then well… it just got really confusing. So I don't know…"

Sam, Dean and Castiel all shared awkward glances. This wasn't really a conversation they ever wanted sprung on them. Dean figured he probably should have had 'the talk' earlier, but John just never seemed curious and Dean didn't want to stir up anything that John hadn't been ready for. Sure, the kid knew the dynamics of it, there was no fooling anyone there. Kids just learned these things these days. Not to mention the little fact that his son was a freaking angel and knew a whole lot of shit about a whole lot of shit. Sometimes Dean forgot that despite all that John was still just a human boy.

Dean took a breath to begin, "John… ah… look, you're fourteen. You don't need all the answers yet Kiddo. You're body's going through a lot of things that no one ever really understands, despite what doctors may tell you. And it doesn't have to be black and white you know. Sometimes love is blind and you will be drawn to who you're drawn to, but you won't really know who that is until you meet them. I don't exactly have the best track-record with relationships, my longest one other than your father lasted a year and that was only because Uncle Sam made me promise I'd give it a shot… Then of course I just happen to fall for a creature who isn't even human and look how it turned out? You know, you go back in time and tell me that I'm going to be in love with an Angel of the Lord and spend the rest of my life with him and have two amazing sons out of the deal and I'd probably put a bullet through your head. All I thought about when I was fourteen was—"

"Dean," Castiel interrupted.

"Right, we can save those stories for later," Dean grinned. "My point is, don't stress over it and don't worry about it. You wanna like Jack? You go ahead and like Jack. Jill strikes your fancy no problem—"

"Her name's not Jill," John rolled his eyes.

Dean rolled his right back, "That's not the point I'm making here, Monkey… I'm just saying, let it be."

"The Beatles? Again?" John blinked.

"Shuddup," Dean said teasingly. "My point, John, is that we'll support you no matter what you decide… Except if you get a thing for a demon, because one have us has been down that road before… not fun."

"Dean," Sam glared.

"Check. No demons," John nodded solemnly, a ghost of a smile appearing. "How about an angel?'

"Been down that road… twice," Dean grinned. "Lots of fun."

"Dean," Castiel glared.

"Okay, angels are cool. Humans, angels… ah… shape shifters?" John ventured, smile broadening now.

"Li'l slimey… but sure," Dean shrugged. "As long as they haven't killed anyone… Basically, if they haven't killed anyone, you're good… Except if they want to eat you."

John laughed, "Okay, okay. I think I'll just stick to the less-than-supernatural humans as it stands right now. I'll worry about interspecies relationships when I'm older."

"Sounds like a plan," Dean nodded sagely then quirked a grin. "So we good?"

"Yeah, we're good," John said.

"You can have your stuff back then… As long as I get to finish this one story… Shingo is about to ask Hiro for tea," Dean remarked.

End