Full Summary: Zemyx from Zexion's POV. Zexion is a shy, completely quiet high schooler who meets Demyx, a friendly and social teen who is always open for making a new friend. Zexion doesnt have much to lose, considering he doesnt have anything to begin with, but Demyx's dedication proves to be harder to accept than he thought. His mom is in rehab, his grandmother-the only source of love he had-is dying, and his dad's death are just too much for Zexion. Demyx tries so hard to help his new friend, but both get a taste of loneliness. Warning: Future chapters will include self-harm, strong language, and intense anxiety. but it will be good drama, trust me! ;P

I woke up nervous for my first day of school. Ok well it's not really the first day, but I had to transfer schools since I moved. Again. This is the fourth time in the past year. My mom just got admitted back into rehab so now I'm moving back with my aunt and uncle, where I'm pretty much invisible. Out in public, I'm completely invisible. For the past five years, I've slowly worked at eliminating my need to talk. My verbal communication comes and goes, but when it comes, it'll stay on and off. When it goes, it goes for months. It's gotten to the point that, unless you met me before I started high school, you wouldn't know that my name is Zexion. You wouldn't know that I'm two grades above my age or that I like to draw. You wouldn't know that I have my reasons as to why I've gained the label as an 'emo-freak'. And if you truly knew me, which no one does, then you'd know why that label is right.

The second I sat up in bed I knew it was going to be a bad day. I could feel it. I was currently in my longest silence streak ever: 4 months and not a sound to anyone besides my aunt, uncle, or grandmother. At 'home', I would grunt or sigh, but most of my communication was done through nodding, shaking my head, or facial expressions, which I barely used unless I absolutely needed to. In public, I didn't make a sound; nothing more than a cough or sneeze. I didn't know how I was going to survive my first day without having to say my name at least once. Knowing me, I'd make a nametag. I'm already going to get looked at as being weird and emo, so might as well give them a name. Call me pessimistic, I don't give a shit. I stopped caring when my dad did…

Anyway, I took a quick shower, threw on some black skinny jeans, a black V-neck along with a black zip-up hoodie. Yes, I like black. I fixed my straight, slate, hair as I usually do with my long side bangs covering one of my eyes. I shoved a pen and a notebook in my black backpack and left the comfort of my room.

"When do you have work?" I heard my aunt ask my uncle as I brushed past them.

"Wait right there young man!" My uncle called and I rolled my eyes, turning to face him, waiting for him to continue.

"Dinner is on your own, so don't come home too late." My aunt said, not even looking at me, but I didn't care, I was already half way out the door.

I walked to my new school, since it is only a ten minute walk, and quickly entered the main office. For once, I wished that I had my aunt or uncle with me to do the talking for me, but I handed them a paper with my information and without any talking, I actually got my schedule.

"I'm Aerith, and I'm your counselor. If you need any help or need someone to talk to, I'm here." She smiled sweetly as she handed me my schedule.

I nodded.

"Would you like any help finding your classes?" She asked and again I nodded. "This way." She walked with me and I followed as I looked around me. My last high school was an outdoor school, but this was completely indoors, which I didn't really like. "What's your favorite subject?" she asked me, no doubt trying to cover up the awkward silence. I pointed to the Advanced Science subject on my schedule.

"Do you have any siblings?" She was trying to keep a conversation that didn't exist, but I shook my head honestly. "Where are you from?" She asked and I pointed in the direction from which my aunts house is. "Do you talk?" She asked, laughing a bit, trying to be funny, but when I shook my head, she stopped. "Are you going to be ok making friends?" I looked away. I hated that topic. Friends. What are friends but people who are there one minute but ditch you for the next best thing that comes their way? I shrugged. "You are always welcome to come talk to me." She smiled and I nodded and we continued walking until we came to my first class, math.

I love math. Math and science are the two best subjects ever. Math is so perfect. It has only one right answer and it has no room for error. Science allows me to live out my curious inquiries by still living in that safe environment where everything has its limits and its rationality.

Aerith opened the door and let me walk in first before she interrupted the teacher. Class started nearly twenty minutes ago.

"Hello Luxord." Aerith greeted the teacher who did not look at all like the math teachers I remember having. This guy had beach blonde hair and multiple ear piercings, and he looked like he could be a casino body guard or something.

"New student?" He asked looking at me and I nodded.

"This is Zexion." Aerith put a hand gently on my shoulder as I faced the class. They all sat wide-eyed at me as if they've never seen an emo kid before. I'm not into label's myself, but it is pretty accurate, so if it works, I guess I don't have a reason to complain about it.

"There's a seat right there." Luxord pointed to an open seat in the back and I dragged my body there, slumping in my seat.

"Demyx, can you show Zexion around? I think he has a very similar schedule to yours." Aerith's voice was so soft and delicate, it was almost as calming as it was annoying. I wondered how small this school must be if the counselor actually knows the students schedules. I changed my train of thought to see who this Demyx was, but when I realized that the kid next to me answered with a cheerful, "Of course!" then I realized how much trouble I was in. Fuck. He's a preppy boy. He's not bad on the eyes, in fact, I'd even dare to call him beautiful, but his energy was already invading my space.

"I'm Demyx." He stuck out a hand and I ignored him, pretending to be taking out my notebook to begin taking notes. "You're Zexion, right?" He asked and I nodded, keeping my eyes on the board.

"I'm Axel." The kid in front of me turned around. I nodded, as if to say, "Got it," but that doesn't even matter cause he asked me, "Got it memorized?"

I nodded again; man I was going to be dizzy by the end of the day.

Luxord continued his teaching as if I never even showed up, which is actually what I preferred so it didn't bother me. What DID bother me was the way that Demyx kept asking me stupid questions.

"So where do you live?" He whispered, and since we were in class, I just started writing notes.

"Close by." I wrote and he wrote back.

"Let me see your schedule." I handed it to him and he wrote back, "Cool! We have third, fourth, and fifth period together too!" Demyx beamed a bright smile that nearly blinded me. I sat there.

"Oh, I'm in his chemistry and literature class." Axel said and I realized that kids at this school aren't like the ones I from where I just left. In my old school, I was alone and fine that way. Here, here they are going to talk to me and wont leave me alone. Ugh, this was going to be longer a day than I thought.

When Luxord excused us, Demyx told me to follow Axel, so I did.

"So, chemistry is like my favorite." Axel grinned almost suspiciously. I stayed silent. "What's the matter with you? Tired?" I shrugged. "Don't you know how to talk?" He asked, so I nodded. "Well then what's wrong with you?" He asked and I shrugged again. "You just don't like talking?" I nodded. "I see. Well that sounds….boring." Axel said and I shrugged again. "Alright, here we are." Axel let me go in first and he introduced me to the teacher. "Vexen, this is Zexion. He doesn't talk." He said and Vexen stared at me curiously.

"Why not?" He asked.

"Who knows? He wont say." Axel said and took a seat.

"Go sit with Axel; he's good at chemistry and can help you if you need it." Vexen said and I rolled my eyes as I obeyed. Me? Need help with Chemistry? Please. If anything, by the end of the year, I'll be replacing Vexen at his job.

"So for this next section you," Axel started but stopped when he saw that I already finished the exercises on the board. "Whoa! You're done already?" Axel asked and I nodded. "Let me see." He took my paper, eyed it carefully, and put it down with wide eyes. "Damn kid, what are you, some genius?" I shrugged. "Well that's pretty impressive, but we still have half an hour left." Axel smirked.

If I was going to be perfectly honest with myself, I'd confess how amazing his eyes are. They're so strong a green and his hair is pretty out there too since it's a bright red, which actually looks really good on him. Then there's Demyx. Even though I'm a 'pessimist' who doesn't like labels, he's the cutest prep I've ever seen. And even though his smile can get annoying and overbearing…..it's….adorable. Whatever. I need to focus on school. I don't have time to think about how white his teeth are or how soft and silky his blonde Mohawk looks.

When Chemistry ended, Axel walked me to the music room, where he explained that Demyx would be the Teaching Assistant. He warned me that the teacher, Saix, is kind of scary when he's mad, but that Demyx is a great musician and loves to help students who have questions. I don't play any instruments, so I knew from the beginning that I was going to suck. But when Axel left me to go to his own class and I walked in alone, I felt this pitiful failure inside me.

"Hey Zexion." Demyx waved to me so I sat next to him. "How was chemistry?"

I shrugged and he took out his phone.

"Axel told me that you don't talk. Why not?" He asked and I shrugged. Really? I know he's cute, but he has to be smarter than that. "Oh, well, that's cool I guess." He said and got up to help students while the class started. I had to pick an instrument so I looked into the big supply closet to see what my options were.

"What are you thinking of?" Demyx walked up behind me and I pointed to the guitar. It only had six strings, so it couldn't be that hard, right? "Oh, the guitar is a wonderful instrument!" Demyx picked it up and motioned me to follow him into an empty room.

"Since you're new, Saix said that I can teach you one on one in here." He smiled and I nodded that I understood. I feel like a lot of people think I'm stupid cause I don't talk, so I nod after anything that I understand, which is pretty much everything.

"Are you right handed or left handed?" He asked and I held up my left hand. "Here, hold it like this." He handed me the guitar and moved over to my right hand which was at the top. He tried to teach me a couple of chords, but it just didn't feel natural to me. After half of the class time, I learned two chords.

"So, are you happy to be here?" He asked and I strummed the G chord as I shook my head. "Would you rather go back to your old school?" He asked, looking sad. I nodded as I strummed the C chord.

"Is it your parents that are stopping you?" H asked and I tilted my head, strumming G again. "It must be hard, huh?" he asked, and his voice sounded so genuinely concerned that it almost bothered me. As I strummed C again, I felt sad. It was weird. I normally don't feel. I get agitated and frustrated, but I can usually block most everything else out. But his voice and the sorrow on his face, it just made me want to cry. "Do you have any friends at your old school?" He asked and I strummed G. It became silently official that G meant 'no' while C meant 'yes'.

"Do you have any friends at all?" he asked, sounding like he was really bothered, but when I strummed G again, it only got worse. "Zexion? Why not?" He asked and I shrugged. "Am, am I your friend?" He asked and I froze. If I say no, will he get mad? And if I say yes, what does that even mean? "I guess a few hours of knowing someone isn't enough just yet." He smiled to encourage me and I nodded. "Well class is about over, so we should put the guitar back." Demyx stood up and took it from my hand as we left.

"P.E. is next and coach Lexaeus is a beast." Demyx said as we entered the boys locker room.

"So, do you have P.E. clothes yet?" Axel asked and I shook my head.

"Guess he'll have to wear spares." Demyx handed me a shirt and some gym shorts and I nodded my thanks at him with the same straight face I've had all damn day.

"Have you started the math homework yet Dem?" Axel asked and Demyx laughed.

"Yea right! I'll probably do it as Luxord is collecting it." Demyx took off his shirt and to my own surprise, I couldn't stop staring. I wont deny myself the fact that I'm gay. Since I don't talk, no one knows, but I'm not one for relationships anyway. What I do know though, is that Demyx shirtless is pretty much the hottest thing ever. I gulped and blinked, trying to tell myself to look away, but I just didn't want to miss out on his sweet and well defined abs.

"I'll probably do it the day after." Axel joked with him and when Demyx put his new shirt on, I looked away. Axel took his off and although his red hair at the base of his stomach was hot, I missed Demyx's blonde.

"You going to change?" Demyx asked me and I nodded. I put his shirt over my long sleeve black V neck and changed quickly into the shorts while they were.

"Arent you going to get hot?" Axel asked but I lied, shaking my head.

The one lesson I learned from being emo is that you have to live with long sleeves to hide cuts and scars. Eventually you get used to it.

Physical Education was a joke, thankfully, since Demyx, Axel, and I all walked the track in circles like ten times. The two talked a lot and occasionally they asked me yes or no questions and I would nod or shake my head. I was happy that they were getting used to my system and that they weren't criticizing me for it or asking even more stupid questions.

This system worked pretty damn well, and for the rest of my first week, I followed those two silently in nearly everything they did.

"So, can I ask you a question? I want you to be honest." Axel started one day as we walked the track in P.E like we always do, and I nodded. "Do you want us to leave you alone? I mean, I don't want to ignore you or make you feel like you're not included, but I don't want to bother you either. You never have anything to say, so I feel like we're just annoying you." Axel said and I thought for a moment. Just that Monday morning, in math, I was praying that they'd shut up and leave me alone. But for this entire week I've been following them blindly and doing what they tell me cause…..cause I don't feel threatened by them. I don't trust them, I don't trust anyone. But at the same time, I don't want them to leave. Well, it's more like, I don't want them to leave me.

My long silence and thought was taking longer than I expected. I knew that I didn't want them to leave, but I already forgot how he worded his question and if I should shake my head or nod. It's times like these when I know I could talk, but once you get used to silence, it's hard to switch back.

"Come on Dem." Axel grabbed Demyx's arm and turned him around. I ran after them and shook my head. "If you want to hang out with us, say so." Axel said, his demeanor serious. I nodded, but he interrupted. "I said, 'say so', with your mouth." Axel folded his arms and I looked away. Of course I didn't forget how to talk, but I just hate it. I hate my voice and I hate the hatred that comes out of other peoples mouths whenever I'd say something. My whole life people told me to shut up. I wish they'd make up their damn minds.

"It's ok Axel, he doesn't have to." Demyx said and I thought he was saving me, until he continued. "If he prefers silence, then that's what he'll get." Demyx actually looked genuinely hurt as he took off.

"Way to go." Axel scoffed at me and ran after Demyx as the bell rang. I didn't know what to do. What did I do wrong? I usually glare at people and give them dirty looks, but this entire week I've remained neutral. I couldn't see why they were suddenly treating me like this.

I walked back to the locker room, taking my own sweet time, realizing that I truly am meant to be alone. I went into the row that Demyx, Axel, and I all changed in before the period began, but as I walked back in, they walked out. Demyx was quick to leave and Axel lingered.

"He said to just leave his shit in his locker." Axel pointed to Demyx's P.E. locker behind me. I still had yet to get my own P.E clothes and Demyx was kind enough to let me have his spares. I nodded, feeling…sad.

"You brought this upon yourself you know." Axel said and he too looked a bit remorseful. I shook my head. Was I …pleading? "Look, I know we've only known you for a week and all but," Axel looked around. The locker room was pretty much empty. "Don't tell him I told you, but, Demyx, he likes you." Axel whispered and I looked at him, shocked. What the fuck? Someone likes me? I couldn't comprehend the words coming out of his mouth.

"He thinks that you are cute and that you have a lot to say and just need someone to help you learn how. For whatever reason that you're not talking, that's your own business. But at the same time, if you don't start including other people in your life, don't expect them to include you in theirs." Axel started to walk away, but I grabbed his arm.

I nodded, hanging my head low.

"Axel!" Demyx yelled and Axel sighed before he pulled his arm away.

The walk home was more quiet, depressing, and lonely than I thought it would be. It's been a while since I spent so much time with people, especially the same people for hours like the way I did with Axel and Demyx. Is that all it took to want to get to know someone? I don't remember ever telling anyone that I liked them, and I certainly don't recall being liked by anyone besides my grandmother, but she's dying and it wont be long till I'm all alone.

I forgot what it was like to have friends and to feel like I belong somewhere. I missed it more than I was willing to admit. But at the same time, I was scared to get involved in something that is much bigger than me.

I walked inside the house, empty, quiet, and went into my room. I did the little homework I had, and spent the rest of my day watching videos online about how to play the guitar.

Author's Note, IMPORTANT PLEASE READ: I just wanted to warn anyone reading this that this story will get VERY HEAVY. There will be a LOT of anxiety, cussing, and even some self-harm. If that is not your style, then I'd advise that you stop. I wont spoil any ending or scenes to come, but I just want you all to know that there will be some serious tension, anxiety, and drama in this story. There wont be any lemons, nothing explicit at least. I do hope that you continue to read this story as it does have some personal significance to me. I wont get too into it, but I really hope that you continue to read this, despite the warning I gave. I just wanted to let people know what they were getting into ^_^

Heart, Sarabellum