Whole Again

Gale and I have been in our own place for almost 2 years now. It's not exactly right next door to Annie like we wanted but it's only a 5 minute walk, and we got a telephone specifically for her if she would ever need us for anything.

At first I was really uneasy about the whole thing, leaving Annie all alone. I visited nearly every day like some overbearing parent. It took a while but I finally started feeling more at ease leaving her alone with just Finney and herself. Well I don't feel the need to go "visit" her every day, anyway.

She redecorated my whole room practically the day after we moved out. Painted the whole thing green and with my help, we drew in and painted all sorts of Sea life on the walls so it looks like you're under water. I think Finney likes having his own room, he even sleeps in one of those short little, what are they called? Toddler beds? He's almost 3 now, and is more like his mother in demeanor every day. He may be the spitting image of his father, but he is all Annie personality wise, so sweet and caring. Posy is absolutely in love with him.

We all still have dinner at Hazelle's house every other Sunday, although, lately it has only been one Sunday a month. Everyone is just so busy, and the kids are all getting bigger and less interested in spending time with adults. Who can blame them though?

All in all we are slowly rebuilding our lives.

As Gale and I are not in Annie's "neighborhood", we don't have the luxury of having a beach in our back yard, but it's still a cozy little place. It's perfect for us, it's all wooden, like nearly all the house's are around here, but our bedroom is quite large, and there is a small second bedroom. Well I guess technically it's an office, since Gale uses it as one. He has maps plastered all over the walls, with all sorts of red and yellow and green lines all over them. He says it's for keeping track of specific fish migrating patterns but it just looks like a jumbled mess to me. He also has a small wooden desk and one filing cabinet in the room as well. As Districts 4's manager in imports and exports as well as being a part of a tactics team for fishing strategies and recording migrating patterns, he does need to be somewhat organized.

Our back yard has a small deck that transitions right into the sand. We have some wooden fencing on either side of the yard, but no fencing parallel with the house. You just walk back until you run into sand dunes and a very thick, dense, batch of beach plants, Sea oats and a few Seagrape trees. It's impossible to maneuver anything back there. Sometimes I miss having the beach out the kitchen window, or a few feet away, but for the most part I love our little place.

Within about a month of our move I got a part time job. Gale insisted it was unnecessary, and we may or may not have had a fight over it, but I wanted to contribute my share, and to be honest, I couldn't stand sitting at home all day with nothing to do. I had to get out, even if it was only for a half a day. So I just work at the local cannery in town. I get there around 8, which is about the same time the first shipment of fish comes in off the docks. I am mainly in charge of "record keeping" or "the books" as I call them. It's tedious work, keeping track of every fish that enters the building, but it's easy work. Sometimes I even have time to go down stairs and help clean and gut the fish. Since we don't exactly have a "quota" anymore, it's not an exact science or an exact number, but more of a rough estimate. It also helps Gale with his importing and exporting records, so once my book makes it to his desk (which is a few buildings down from the cannery), I know I have at least helped him in some way.

I usually leave the cannery around noon, or sometimes a little after. Occasionally I'll get to meet Hazelle for lunch, but today doesn't seem like it's going to be one of those days.

It's already nearly one in the afternoon when I leave the cannery for the day. I didn't have time for lunch and I'm trying to rush home so I can eat something. I also need to head into the market a little later to pick up a few things for dinner, and I wanted to drop in on Annie if time allows. It's not looking like it allows today. I guess I can always call her.

I bustle down the main part of town, passing a few little shops, adorned with little shell wind chimes hanging from their doors.

By the time I reach our dirt road in our neighborhood, I start feeling a little queasy, the heat is almost unbearable.

When I finally make it home, I kick my shoes off at the door and crank the air down to make it cooler. I quickly make myself a sandwich, and stuff it down my throat and follow it with a huge swig of water.

I sit on the couch and fan myself with my hand for a few minutes trying to mentally make a list of things we need from the market so I don't have to actually get up and see what we have.

Once I cool off I drudgingly pick myself up and pad over to the fridge to see what we have in the freezer.

I think I'm going to make chicken tonight, and we need more of that milk that District 10 has been exporting here, from real cows, not stupid goat milk.

I lace my shoes back up and head back out into the heat.

The trip to the market went faster than I thought it would. I still made it home at least an hour before Gale should be home.

I put everything away and start on dinner.

I cut all the fat off the chicken, rub it down with some herbs and a pinch of seasoning before I stick it in the oven to bake.

I make my way into the bathroom and then splash some cold water on my face. I can't believe how ridiculously hot is today.

I get another drink of water and start skinning potatoes.

Gale is usually home from work around 4:30 in the afternoon. He's on the 7am-4pm shift, with an hour break for lunch, which I know he never takes. Usually eats at his desk.

Now that it is after five, I'm wondering what in the world is holding him up today. His dinner went cold at least 30 minutes ago and I had to put it away.

I ate without him.

I pick up the phone in the kitchen and give Annie a call.

"Annie, hey it's Johanna, you haven't heard from Gale today have you?"

"No, sorry Johanna" Annie replies on the other end.

"Okay, have you and Finney eaten dinner yet? I was going to come down. I can bring you guys some dinner."

"Thanks Johanna, but we already ate. You're more than welcome to come down though."

"Alright, I'll be over in a few."

"Bye Johanna," Annie replies and I hang up the phone.

I go in Gale's office and scribble a note to him really quick.

Gale,

Went down to Annie's. Your dinner is in the fridge.

Be back soon.

Love,

J

I stick the note on our small kitchen table and head out the door yet again. Now that the sun has started going down the heat isn't overwhelming. I make it down our dirt road and to Annie's in no time at all.

"Knock knock," I say as I open the door without actually knocking.

"JoNana!" Finney screams and runs towards me.

I reach down and scoop him up as soon as he's close enough. "Hey Finney!"

"Aunt. Jo. Anna. Finn" Annie corrects him.

"Awwww….leave him alone Annie, he can call me JoNana. I call him Finney after all, it's only fair."

She only rolls her green eyes at me and I put Finney down and shut the door.

He wraps his little fist around my index finger and pulls me towards his room. "Auntie JoNana, My color a purty picture for you today."

"You did? I want to see it." I tell him as he lets go of my hand and stands on his tippy toes to try to turn his light switch on.

I help by flipping the switch on for him and I see there are toys and wax crayons everywhere and about 5 different "pictures" scattered across the floor.

He runs right into the chaos and digs around for the right picture. He picks one up and studies it for a minute and then throws it back on the floor. He picks up another one, studies it for a minute and then brings it over to me.

"Look. Sun." He say's pointing to a tiny yellow dot amongst the scribbles of colors.

"Wow, Finney. The Sun is yellow. You're right. Good job."

He flashes his million dollar smile at me and I hand the paper back to him.

"No, JoNana. You have."

"Thank you Finney. I love it. I will put it on my fridge when I get home."

He wraps his little arms around my legs and I run my fingers through his soft bronze curls. I love that this feature is solely his. Annie has no idea where he got his curls from, but I love them.

"Can you make me another picture Finney? I'm just gonna go talk to mama really quick, okay?"

"Otay, JoNana." He says as he lets go of my legs and starts searching the floor, seemingly, for the perfect color to start his new masterpiece.

"Got a souvenir" I hold up my picture for Annie to see.

"Why is it so hot in here?" I add.

"I didn't realize it was hot in here. I'm fine, but I'll turn the fan on for you." Annie tells me.

"Naaah, it's okay. I'm not staying long. I just wanted to check in on ya and see Finney. I haven't seen him in a few days. How has your week been so far?"

"Oh fine," Annie replies. "Just been keeping busy. Finnick, Jr. is just getting into everything lately. I can't keep up with his messes, so I just contained it to his room."

"Yeah, I noticed" I chuckle. "I'm getting a drink, it's way too stuffy in here."

She narrows her eyes at me briefly before I make my way into the kitchen and chug some more water.

"So what are your plans for Finney's birthday?" I ask her. "It's coming up soon, going to be the big 3 year old boy now."

"Oh gosh I know. I am most likely just going to bake him a cake and have you and Gale, and Hazelle and the kids over. Most likely Ellie too, or as you like to call her "the old lady two doors down".

"Same difference" I retort. "Well, just let me know a date, and I'll be there. I can come over early and help you make the cake if you want."

"Sure Johanna. That would be nice."

"Alright," I tell her as I flip my water glass upside down in the sink. "Guess I'll get going, maybe I can come down this weekend and we can take Finney swimming or something?"

"Sure Johanna, sounds good."

"Okay, I'm just going to say bye to Finney. See you this weekend." I wave to her before making my way down the hall, picture in hand.

"Finney, Auntie JoNana has to go bye bye now. I will see you in a few days."

He snaps his little head up from his art work and smiles at me again. "Bye bye, JoNana," He drops his crayon and waves to me.

"Bye Finney."

I walk back down the hall and to the front door before I tell Annie "see ya later" and head out into the twilight.

I get home just in time, night has officially arrived and I see lights on inside, which means Gale's home.

I walk up our front porch steps and open the door. The humidity of the house blows right in my face.

"Gale?" I shout as I head into the kitchen and use a magnet to stick Finney's picture on the fridge, as promised.

"In here" I hear his muffled response from his office.

I open the door and ask "Did you turn the air back up? It is hot as hell in here."

"Yeah, I did. It was like winter in District 12 in here when I got home. I was ready to pull out my snow jacket."

"Well, it's hot now."

"I think it feels fine."

"I don't, I'm going to go get a shower. Did you eat?"

"Yeah, thanks." He replies distractedly, and turns back to his paperwork and I shut the door.

Well that was weird. He never just says "yeah thanks" when I cook. Never overlooks an opportunity to invite himself into the shower with me. Humm..oh well.

I make my way into our master bathroom, which is connected to our room and strip out of my clothes. I feel like I smell of fish and I'm a little sticky from the sweat, from the heat.

I turn the water on and blast it with mostly cold water, and add just a touch of hot to it.

My little water ritual has become more habit forming than anything. I'm not exactly afraid of the water anymore, it's just habit now. So I put the palm of my right hand into the stream, then my left palm. I hop in and stick my right foot in the stream of water, and then my left. I finally allow my whole body to enter and I am immediately relaxed as the cool jets of water stream off my shoulders and roll down my back.

I stand under the stream for a long time, not wanting to move. Eventually I wash my hair and body and shave my armpits, before I rinse, condition and rinse again enjoying the frigid water.

I sigh as I turn the water off and the heat envelops me again.

I dry my body and wrap the towel around my head as I make my way back into the room and put on a pair of blue underwear and a blue tank top.

I go back in the bathroom, run the towel through my hair, brush the knots out and brush my teeth. All that walking today has worn me out.

I make my way across the house and open Gale's office door. He jumps just the tiniest bit.

"I'm going to bed." I announce.

"Okay," He gets up and makes his way over to me. "Good night" He bends down and pecks me on the lips.

"Night" I tell him. "Don't stay up too late, huh? You work all day."

"I won't"

I shut the door behind me, grab one more glass of water and then lay in bed with the ceiling fan on full speed, not caring the tiniest bit that it is only 7:30.