Since it was already past check out time at the hotel, the group had to wait outside with their bags packed until Annie showed up. Britta and Shirley took it upon themselves to pack Annie's bag for her – hoping that she wouldn't notice how unorganized it was until much later. But first Annie had to come back before she noticed or not.
Yet finally, Annie could be seen walking over to the gang, looking much more chipper than everyone expected after what Jeff told them. That was just one of the many, many things that needed to be cleared up after the reunion hugs, the initial questions of whether Annie was okay, and the expected awkward Jeff/Annie welcome back moments. Yet since they had stayed past check out and since Jeff would have to put up another bribe to keep their cars in the hotel parking lot in about 10 minutes, they had to get in and drive off before clearing up too much.
Eventually, they were able to touch base when they stopped for lunch, starting with how the group meant to go out and look for Annie after they finished confronting Jeff in the hotel. But after grilling Jeff about sleeping with Carol for so long, they ran out of energy to do anything but keep calling Annie. Yet when Annie informed them that she was at a bar with Carol, Jeff had enough energy left to slap his forehead, since he should have figured Annie would keep her Saturday night bar appointment somehow.
Annie giggled and reassured Jeff that she wasn't waiting for him, and filled them in a little bit on how drunk Carol was. But instead of playing the recordings she had of a drunk Carol at the beginning, she kept them secret and didn't reveal how much Carol revealed. She assured her friends that she was okay, that she closed the book on her mother once and for all this time, and that Carol was too drunk and hung over to try anything. The rest was too private and personal to share with anyone, even her Greendale family, so she kept it to herself and was relieved when the others decided to stop prying.
But they got on a roll when they recapped their little talks with Jeff, which actually made Annie laugh a bit. Yet apparently Jeff had said some things that finally got the others off his back….things they said that Jeff should say to her alone. They also assured her that no matter what, they would have Annie's back and stomp on Jeff's if she ever gave them the order. Jeff had no commentary on that, since they made their stance clear with some vivid imagery to him last night – even Abed said it sounded more extreme than the Human Centipede and Saw series combined.
However, Annie told both Jeff and the others that she was fine, especially after that show of loyalty. She also reassured them that like Jeff said, they were already working out their issues on each Saturday night together. In addition, she let them all know that she wasn't ready to handle any more romantic aspects and complications, as she still needed to work through mourning her father and what she went through with Carol first.
Annie knew that she was pretty much putting Jeff off, just like Jeff did whenever she wanted to go deeper into their relationship and he didn't. But she promised Jeff that they would talk about them and their deeper issues eventually, and that they would keep up their Saturday outings in the meantime. Yet since both their heads weren't entirely clear after this weekend, it would be better to reassess everything after enough time went by to think straight again.
Although Jeff actually looked disappointed at putting this off – which was just sad and ironic enough to almost make Annie change her mind – Annie stood firm and got him to agree. As such, they all headed back to Greendale on good terms, with Annie once again thankful to have such understanding friends and loved ones left.
It did still creep her out a bit that they had been so uncharacteristically successful in saying and doing the right thing. However, when the next week's Greendale adventure kicked off and the group was left at each other's throats just like the old days, the realization of it made Annie laugh in loud, long relief. This made everyone stop arguing as Annie expressed joy that they were really back to normal now. It not only helped them settle their arguments in the end like normal, it was also a good ice breaker for Jeff and Annie to talk about that Saturday and get their routine back in order.
For the next two weeks, order was restored in the disorderly study group universe, as everyone returned to their usual routines and clichés. In the meantime, since Jeff and Annie were experts at moving past chaotic incidents without really talking about them, they were able to do it again this time and act like normal around each other. They still hung out each Saturday, had each other's backs in Greendale and occasionally bickered again to boot.
What Jeff didn't see was how Annie went to her father's grave each Saturday afternoon, as she filled her dad in on her week and kept working through her feelings on his death. Her father couldn't talk back, but getting everything out that she couldn't get out to him while he was alive was cathartic. It also helped her vent out on Carol and Jeff as well, which helped clear her head as she tried to figure out just how she would settle her last remaining issues.
Now that a month had gone by since the funeral, Annie knew she had to do something. There was a week until the school year ended, and she was not going to let unresolved Jeff issues hang over her for another summer. Although Annie had put Carol largely out of her mind now, the psychological issue of romantically being with Jeff after he slept with Carol – and the new one of making out with him to get back at Carol right after Dad's funeral – was still potent.
She swore that Carol herself wouldn't haunt her anymore, or that what Carol did with Jeff wouldn't get to Annie more than it had. But that still left a few old psychological hurdles to overcome – and she had done better getting over some of them than others.
She knew she wanted to be with Jeff and that Jeff might still want to be with her – assuming that waiting around for another month didn't put him back in his shell. But Annie also knew that even if she could make Jeff her official boyfriend, there was still a ways to go before she could be "intimate" with him. And for someone like Jeff, waiting even longer than he already had for "intimacy" might well be a deal breaker. Maybe new Jeff was different, but Annie knew the old Jeff couldn't go down without a fight – and her waiting around might have weakened the new Jeff's fighting powers.
There were so many things Annie didn't know….yet she did know that it was past time to find out a couple of things.
Therefore, Annie was finally ready to lay out a plan for the coming Saturday. She told Jeff that she wanted to be the one to drive him this time, then worked out where she wanted to take him instead of their usual bar. When that was finished, she just had to wait around for Saturday to arrive and put it all on the line.
That day, Annie went back to her father's grave and let out her plans, fears and expectations for the evening. She didn't want to be crazy enough to imagine that he was listening, or would have helpful advice on this matter if he was alive – especially since she still needed her wits for tonight. However, while Annie couldn't possibly use her imagination to picture that her mother would be any help if things were different, she had wiggle room when it came to her father.
Just having some representation of her dad to talk to and not talk back to her was a good enough warm up for Annie; and her sadness over the circumstances had become manageable by now. So with her head a little clearer, Annie kissed her dad's gravestone, asked for him to wish her luck and headed off to the uncertain future.
The future picked Jeff up at 7:30 p.m. and started to drive over to the bar like usual. Yet Annie then pretended to gasp suddenly and called out "Oh rats, I forgot to get something at the store today! I'd better get it now before it drives me crazy at the bar!"
"You can't just wait till we're done?" Jeff made sure, to which Annie responded "It's a…..special product I ran out of. So yeah, I'd rather get it settled now." That shut Jeff up completely, as Annie internally cheered at pulling her script off. She was still not on a Carol level of lies and deceit, but she was getting better – for better and worse.
Jeff didn't suspect anything when Annie drove off course, still figuring they were just heading to a department store. However, some red flags did go up after a few more minutes – then they were set on fire when they neared an establishment he found familiar. In fact, Annie was turning and making her way into its parking lot.
"You know what, my product can wait a few more minutes. I remembered I wanted to stop in here first, clumsy me," Annie now clearly pretended to forget.
"Annie, you can't possibly think I'd believe you were that forgetful….so what is this, really?" Jeff inquired.
"Okay, no more acting, then. Jeff, I'm sorry I've put off….talking about certain things with you for a month now. I'd say it was a taste of your own medicine if I wasn't sincerely sorry and ready to make amends. I have….things I want to discuss that wouldn't sound as good in a bar, so I decided I'd like to say them in there….with you. Like a….practice date, if you will," Annie wrapped up.
"You wanted to surprise me….by taking me here to talk?" Jeff tried to confirm. When Annie nodded yes, she tried to calculate what Jeff's reaction could possibly be. Yet if she had more than the five seconds she got, she still wouldn't have anticipated him laughing. "Jeff? Jeff, you'd better have a good excuse for cracking up, mister!" Annie insisted, trying to be formidable before she started to get angry.
"Do you know why I didn't pick up the phone when your dad died? No, I guess not, because then you'd be laughing now too," Jeff answered himself. "I turned my phone off because I was planning to take you here….and discuss some things with you…that Saturday!" Jeff laughed again as he pointed to the restaurant he had picked out to take Annie to a month ago.
"Jeff, don't joke like that!" Annie answered disbelievingly. "If that was true, then it means I stole your idea without knowing it….and you were going to take me here the day of my dad's funeral…..and you were going to….discuss some things too…." As Annie studied Jeff's smiling, still chuckling face for any of his tell-tale lying signs, she was shocked to not find any of those 48 tells at all. Then it dawned on her that Jeff really was telling the truth, and that Annie had just….and that they both….
Annie could then only hold back her own uncontrollable laughter for about three seconds. Jeff soon joined back in as well, as they both reveled in this latest dramatic irony. But considering that Jeff would have taken Annie here on that day a month ago, and that the day went….in such a different direction instead, there was a touch of bitter sadness mixed into their hysteria. And Annie still felt it hang over just a little bit by the time she finally started to catch her breath.
Yet if Annie let that affect her, she would never get through the rest of the evening. So she tried to dismiss it as one more psychological test she would face inside, and get things back on track. "So….since I really did steal your whole idea, you want to go ahead and lead us in?" Annie offered.
"No, I like how your version is going so far. I'm going to keep watching and compare notes," Jeff jested. "So….did you intend to cover us both? Because my budget tonight only covers beer, water and bar crackers."
"Don't worry, I saved enough. But if you feel like you should cover half since it was your idea first….I won't nitpick," Annie semi-joked as she was building up her confidence again. With that, she left the car and went over to open the door for Jeff, trying to savor her joking mood while she still could.
The light mood carried over inside when they got their table, sat down and looked through the menu. But they both knew they weren't really here to eat the food, and Annie wanted to get back to business while she still had the nerve.
"Jeff? I'm sorry I brushed aside everything that happened….four weeks ago and all. I had to clear my head before I knew what I wanted to say. I mean, acting on impulses didn't really turn out well….back then. But I think I'm ready to have 'the talk' now," Annie assured.
"'The talk'? Well, there might not be enough birds and bees left to help, but if they've been patient this long…." Jeff made a half-hearted effort to joke before things got serious. But Annie wasn't laughing.
"Actually, first I want to ask a few questions before we start talking. You told me after we….got close in the backyard….that I had no idea how long you wanted to admit you wanted that. Now that I look back, I probably took it the wrong way….so what did you really mean by it? How long were you ready to admit that you wanted to kiss me?"
Annie half expected Jeff to stumble through a half-answer, since she probably shut his slim window of opportunity to be honest a month ago. Indeed, Jeff seemed to be thinking of ways to sidestep the question now. Yet then he said, "Since a few days after Carol stomped out of Greendale….probably even at the end of that day. But it's not like I could have said it to you then."
"So is….that why you called me your best friend when we talked that Friday? Was it just code for….something else?" Annie dared to ask.
"It had sort of a truth and code mix to it all at once," Jeff answered as he tried to slip a dose of snark inside. Annie chose to take it the best way she could, and go on with a new question she just added to the list. "And you were planning to take me here before Dad died….where you were going to….stop talking in code. Is that right?"
"You mean was I going to say out loud that I…." Annie's breath stuck as Jeff paused – and she could have sworn that he stopped before saying the letter L. There could only be so many L words Jeff might say in this context – and so many bad possible reasons why Jeff didn't say that one.
"That I want to be with you in a romantic way? Yeah, that's a good translation."
Just when Annie had started to breathe, she had to learn to live without air again.
Once her lungs worked, they quickly started to gasp while she let out a few sobs. Jeff got his planned words ready for if they were happy or sad tears. But it was much more complicated than that.
"You know that I've wanted to hear words like that for a while now. If you said them earlier, I'd be ruining my voice by squealing, and messing up my lips by kissing you over and over right now! But…." Annie tried and failed to continue.
"But….I didn't say them earlier. Not three months ago, anyway. And now I'm too late." Jeff filled in, now getting his words for Annie's sad tears ready to go. Yet Annie cut him off with more words of her own.
"Not exactly….let me start off with the good stuff first. Jeff, I do still want to be with you too….yeah, that should have definitely gone first. Anyway, it's true that I feel better about being with you than I did….exactly three months ago. We've spent those months getting past that and being close again; closer than ever, in fact! And I learned a few things last month about letting my mom get in the way of how I feel about you."
"Which is?" Jeff tried to confirm again.
"It's strong enough to not let my mom stop me from going out with you, or being your girlfriend. Since Mom didn't really 'date' you and she wasn't your girlfriend, she can't scare me off doing those things, at least! Not after these last few months!"
Annie tried not to let herself get off script as she saw Jeff try to contain his relief and growing happiness. She let him feel euphoric for a few seconds before she chimed in with a "But…." She waited for Jeff's contained smile to fade, waiting to see if he got it before she had to say it.
"But….you have a hang-up with the other stuff," Jeff deduced.
"Yeah. Like I said, you having sex with my mom isn't enough to stop me from dating you anymore. But being…..intimate with you….that's still another matter. I thought I was getting over it before the funeral….but after I…." Annie trailed off as Jeff filled in the rest.
"Annie, I should have stopped you. I should have resisted myself a little while longer, I mean I was doing good until then!" Jeff tried to take the blame.
"Jeff, that's not necessary. I acted out and kissed you at the wrong time….again. And now I don't know if I trust myself to do it the right way anymore….if there is still a right way. I shouldn't let what happened stop me from kissing you and doing….other things…..but I know it'll still be a problem. And I don't know when it won't be," Annie confessed.
"Well….you had weird sex hang-ups from the day I met you. This isn't anything different," Jeff tried to assure Annie.
"But it is! I was just getting over my other sex problems, remember?" Annie recalled.
"Right….you did face the music on a few sexy things," Jeff said to allude to Annie's musical sexy Santa performance.
"This is different….I really took a few big steps back at my Dad's house. And I can't tell you when it might get better. I don't know when I'll make out with you and not think of how my mom kissed you, or whether I'm trying to outdo my mom, or if I'll mess it up like I did after the funeral. All I know is I can't put us both through that until I'm ready, and I don't know when I'll be! And…." Annie steeled herself before she willed herself to give Jeff his way out.
"I know you haven't….been with anyone since my mom, and being without…..someone for three months is really long for you. And now you're ready to be with me, but I'm still not comfortable with….being your next someone. It's not fair to torture you like that….I don't want to lead you on like I accused you of leading me on all this time," Annie admitted.
"You know, I always laughed off your excuses for not wanting to be with me. Age, the group, you thinking you'd hurt me, all that stuff that I didn't think mattered. But now that I have my own ridiculous problems I can't get past….I'm sorry for not understanding your hang-ups more. Granted, I might have more legitimate hang-ups than you did. And you let yours stop you from having a relationship, while mine are only stopping me from making out and having sex now. But I'm going to let that slide," Annie offered.
"The point is, asking you to wait even longer to get….close to me…..you don't have to do it. I will do every single thing possible to get over it, but if putting up with that is too much for you, or if you don't think you can wait that long…..I completely understand. So I'm giving you an out right now. If this thing, if my psychological block about getting….physical with you is a deal breaker, then I don't want to make a deal. We can still stay as we are, stay best friends…..and I won't get in your way of getting physical with someone else. I won't be jealous, I won't act out, and I'll support you no matter what you want to do. I'd rather have you in my life than push you away or make you hate me….I get what that feels like now," Annie wrapped up.
As much as it pained her to possibly end it like this, and as much as she was struggling to breathe again, Annie forced herself to keep steady and face Jeff's decision like an adult. After all, she was doing the grown up thing by being honest with her problems, and warning Jeff exactly what he'd be in for if he stayed with her.
After what Jeff told her in the car, it was even clearer that it took everything he had to keep from making out with Annie before the funeral. She couldn't let him keep torturing himself for another three months, or however long it took Annie to feel comfortable about having….relations with him. He'd wind up resenting her or trying to push her before she was ready…..or going to other women when it got to be too much. As much as Annie wanted to believe Jeff couldn't be like that anymore, she couldn't let herself rule it out.
Fearing that might have been cowardly, but Annie wanted to make up for it by being brave enough to give Jeff a way out. These last few months had proven that they still worked great as friends, and if that's all they could have….she was ready to accept it. Unlike other Edison women, Annie would not push someone away or think less of them because he wanted different things than she did. Not anymore.
"Okay….first of all, thank you for making me such a man-whore," Jeff started and made Annie gasp –even now, words like whore were enough to get her flustered. "But since I've made it easy for you to do that for three years, I'll let it slide. Second of all, you giving me a way out and letting yourself settle for just having me in your life….that's what isn't fair. After what I did, I'm still a long way from deserving that kind of consideration," Jeff admitted, and Annie didn't know if that was a good or bad sign.
"You are right on one thing, though. I don't usually spend three months going out with a woman and not…..using my mouth for other skills." Whatever was left of Annie's modesty made her gasp a little quieter at that innuendo, although she was trying not to make this harder on herself.
"But if that's what three months of that stuff is really like….I can see myself going through three more. Or six, or nine…..maybe I'll even take a shot at 12 if I have to."
Annie concentrated hard to decode Jeff's message, and tried not to get carried away when she had a working theory. "Jeff….what exactly are you hinting at?"
"Right, right, I can't use code anymore, got it. Translated, it means I don't need to kiss you or see you naked to want to keep dating you. Not until you're ready, anyway."
Three months ago, the old Annie would have forgotten where she was, jumped up and down and smothered Jeff with kisses right now. That urge was still dancing around in her stomach right now, and Annie didn't know if that was a good or bad thing. She did know it was almost making her forget her remaining questions, so she had to ask them while she still was in her right mind.
"Jeff, you have to be absolutely sure about this. If you're saying that so I won't cry or get upset, I'll reject you here and now. You've never dated like this before, you know."
"I'm pretty sure I've been doing it for the last three months," Jeff recalled. "And I'm still here, aren't I?"
"Well, yeah, but…..but you've been waiting long enough! While I've been freaking out over my issues, you've been resolving yours behind my back! After all this time, you've gotten through all your hang-ups…..and don't get me wrong, I am so, so proud of you for it!" Annie exclaimed.
"Thanks….after facing Carol Edison, being afraid of anything else seemed pretty stupid. The group gave it their best shot, but I got them to back down and give us their blessing. The back stomping if it goes wrong was a fair compromise…..by comparison," Jeff explained.
"See, there you go! You've come even further than I have lately, and now I can't give you everything you deserve for it. It's not fair that I'm making you wait even longer," Annie lamented.
"Annie, I have been 10 times more unfair to you before this. You've still got a very long way to go before you can be unfair to me….or lead me on like I did to you," Jeff reassured.
Annie was even more tempted to stop asking questions and just accept that Jeff wasn't backing away. But so many bubbles had been popped over the last three months….so many things had been set to go right only to have another tragedy or crisis blow up in her face. Technically, that had been happening earlier than three months ago, yet she really couldn't take another example right now. She wasn't used to Jeff saying the right thing so often….or saying things she only dreamed of before three months ago….so she was extra afraid of the bottom being dropped. But if it was going to drop, she needed to get it over with now before it got even harder.
So she pressed on one last time to make sure, demanding, "Jeff, regardless if I'm being unfair by your standards, I need you to tell the truth. Please, please tell me if you're really okay with being patient with me on this. I need to know everything if I'm going to get my hopes up one last time…."
Annie was worried that she said "one last time" the wrong way and gave Jeff the wrong idea. Indeed, he was starting to look more nervous and unsure of what he wanted to say. As such, Annie braced herself again to try and anticipate the worst.
"All right….I'm a wreck, is that what you want me to admit? You'd think after two years, I'd have a better idea how to resist you by now! I'm saying all the right things now, but it's taking everything I have not to….use my mouth in those other ways! I've stopped denying that I wanted to do it for three months, but I've held back until you were ready! That's why I wasn't in any mood to resist you when we were at your dad's backyard. And if you kissed me now, I can't promise that I'd….be ready to stop when you were. After all these years and these last few months, how could I?" Jeff sighed.
"I have never done so much not to kiss an insanely gorgeous, insanely incredible woman before….and that was before I wanted to let myself do it! But it's just so tiring now….especially when you're so close and I'm tired of you not being closer. Wanting to go slow, saying the right thing instead of the snarky thing, being just a friend, not touching you….everywhere I'm dying to touch you…..it's hard work and it's not going to get any easier. And you're right, I might snap one day if I'm even only 99 percent careful!" Jeff confessed as Annie deflated and began to think about how to give him a way out again.
"But I don't care. At least, I don't want to care," Jeff added on. Annie internally sighed, preparing herself to go through another turn on the Jeff rollercoaster – but at least this sounded like a good turn. It would have to do before the next nastier turn – if it came.
"Look at me, Annie….I'm trying. I'm actually trying to do the right thing for you….you know how big that is for me! It's the rarest thing for me, no matter how much you insist that it isn't….but I want to keep trying here. I mean, you just said you were proud of me….you think I want to make that stop? I can't….no, I won't let myself let you down and make you stop being proud of me again." With that, Jeff stopped and actually seemed to groan a bit. "See, being that sincere out loud took a lot of me, but I made myself do it. Even if I can't keep my clothes on until you're ready, I will do every possible thing I can until I fail. So if you'll really have me…. I think I'm due to do one thing right for you. "
"Oh, Jeff," Annie let herself cry out, as she was still more vulnerable to a Winger speech than she intended to be. But no one could blame her. Drunk Carol was right; Jeff could still love her or at least want to be with her without physical stuff after all. Of all the things for her to finally be right in. "You….you don't have to go that cold turkey, you know. It's not like I can never kiss you….I just can't do it that long and without so many clothes yet."
"All right, then we'll ease into it like we did at the bar. Our Saturday dates made you ready to go out with me again, so we'll go the same speed with kissing too. We'll try to do a little more each time, go further when you're ready, and eventually we'll cover and uncover everything," Jeff proposed.
"That sounds workable," Annie admitted. "Can you really-" she stopped herself from questioning his commitment again after doing it too many times already.
"Annie, I don't know if I can, but I'm tired of not finding out. If I was ready months ago, before I even met your mother, none of this would be so hard in the first place. So I deserve whatever problems I get here," Jeff reminded. "We'd both be so much better if I just gave in long ago like you wanted."
"I don't think so," Annie corrected. "It might be easier, but maybe we wouldn't be better. If we just jumped in from the start, we wouldn't be able to handle a real relationship, like we might be able to now. I'm not so carried away with girlish fantasies and romantic dreams anymore….now I'm learning to be practical."
"Annie, you should never have to settle for practical," Jeff pleaded. "If I could be that sappy and romantic and dreamy, I'd have given you that a long time ago!" Even with that, Jeff inwardly cringed at being that sappy, and Annie couldn't help but giggle at his discomfort.
"It's okay, really. I needed to go through you pushing me away for two years before it got okay, but it's okay now. And I needed to go through rehab and being disowned to become a much better person for it. I even needed my mom these last few months, so I could get stronger and grow up a bit more. I needed all that pain to get to where I am now, and you needed yours….but I think it's starting to pay off now. Or at least it will soon. So to get to the point, I forgive you," Annie finally got out.
"Well….if you want to go that far to let me off the hook, guess I can't beat that," Jeff jokingly conceded. He grimaced a bit since he was still fighting to be sincere, yet Annie just giggled to assure him it was okay. This made him relax and smile at her just like in the pre-three months ago era, which emboldened her a bit more.
"Jeff? Can I….try something, please?" Annie asked carefully. Jeff quickly nodded yes, so Annie slowly got up and started to lean her face forward. "This will just take a second," she explained, which further let Jeff know what was happening, and how long it would go on for.
With that to prepare him, Jeff mentally prepared himself while Annie leaned in closer, trying to let her mind go blank. Somehow, she managed to blank it by at least 50 percent, which was just good enough as she got close enough to touch her lips with Jeff's. She then closed her eyes, pressed her lips against his – and when he pressed his back, she held for a full second as she promised before they broke apart.
This was as long as Annie could kiss Jeff right now without getting cold feet, or thinking about/comparing how her mother kissed him. Although it lasted for just a second, the fact that she had done it that long was a terrific baby step. It filled her with her brightest smile, and by instinct it made Jeff light up as much as he could as well.
"I think that was the best kiss we've ever done," Annie proclaimed truthfully. Despite its short length, it wasn't done to win a debate, or to forget about choosing between two other women, or to indulge themselves before denial kicked back in, or to get back at family members. It was just a normal kiss between two people who were finally on the same page, on the same emotional level, and ready to work through their remaining issues together.
That simplicity made it all the more special for Annie, after months and years of over complications. More deeper and longer kisses would probably be more complicated as Annie got through her mental blocks – but for now, it all seemed trivial and not worth worrying about now.
"I'll admit, it's starting to climb up on my list too," Jeff quipped back. Even though the mood was getting lighter again, Annie still felt the need to make one more serious point. "I promise we won't just do one little kiss on every date, Jeff. I won't stop trying until I'm ready to ravage you….I'll even go to your therapist to help me get over this if I have to."
"Well…." Jeff started while trying to shake off Annie saying "ravage"; which made Annie kick herself for making this harder – or rather, more difficult – on him. But Jeff recovered to joke, "Well, it might not be his expertise, but he likes a challenge. And no one's more challenging than you, Edison," he said while trying to make it clear that it wasn't in a bad way – not anymore. Thankfully, Annie took it the right way and indulged in the flattery, until they both remembered they really did need to order some food now.
The night was pretty uneventful after that, as the two ordered their dinner, ate quietly and caught up on things that had little to do with their personal drama. There were no grand romantic gestures or lovey-dovey exchanges, and a good night hug was used instead of a good night kiss at the end. And yet Annie regarded it as the most meaningful romantic night of her life to date.
When she was a child and her parents were in their final years of marriage, Annie saw them eat in silence and barely acknowledge each other's presence. They had nothing to say to each other – nothing sweet, anyway – and were content to let any romantic feelings they still had die away. Such dinners and passionless encounters taught Annie how a relationship and a marriage wasn't supposed to go. So she was more vulnerable to believe romance novels, girly stories and tales of star-crossed lovers as the true examples of love. Or at least truer than the ordinary, loveless example her parents gave her.
But ordinary didn't equate death and a lack of love after all. That was Annie's mistake in getting carried away with Jeff the first few times. Even though it wasn't her choice to be unable to make out with him like in her old fantasies, she had still never felt closer to him than she did now. Jeff had learned to have fun and be comfortable with a woman without sex on the table, and Annie was learning how to make a real adult relationship, not just a fantasy one, work for the long haul. In a sick, psychotic way, maybe she owed it to what Carol Edison did this spring after all.
Yet Annie knew she would never be like her mother. She would not let family and loved ones go like she did, and she would never be too oblivious to learn from her mistakes, or know that she even made them. And Jeff was not Annie's father – a relief in a number of ways – but he wouldn't run away too. No matter how much aggravation an Edison woman caused him, he was not going to give up on her – especially since this Edison woman would give him more reasons to stay.
Granted, her dad stuck around for over 15 years before cutting and running, so whether Jeff had that longevity was still up for grabs. But it took him three years to get through his issues and be willing to try – and there was no way Annie was waiting three years to properly "reward" him.
They might not get as hot and heavy as Jeff imagined, or as sweeping and romantic as Annie had envisioned – not yet, anyway. But when Annie was ready, they would do an ample amount of both the first chance she got. Yet until then, she would be as happy to just be with Jeff as her parents presumably were when they first got together. Only Annie would make sure they had a much happier ending and would pass on far fewer problems to their children.
But that was getting way too carried away…..and having children meant having sex with the man her mother had sex with, and that was….well, a mental obstacle for another day.
THE END