Chapter Fifteen

Roxas sat with his hands locked together in between his knees. His brother sat on the stairs, just below him. Sora was smiling with his eyes closed, letting the breeze go through his brown spikes. Roxas watched Riku and Axel toss a football back and forth. Demyx and Zexion were at the picnic table. Zexion was reading a book and Demyx was trying to get his attention.

"So Roxas, are you ever going to tell Axel? I told Riku the moment we were alone. Then you explained more to him. Will Axel ever get to know? What about Dem and Zex?" Sora asked. He was referring to the reason why they were all at Axel's summer home in the first place. Roxas bit his lip and looked down.

"I can't tell him Sora, he might freak. He'd drive right to Cloud and start a fight. Then we'd be even more screwed. Axel can't know," Roxas replied. Sora opened his eyes and turned around to give his brother a serious look.

"Then what happens after summer? Where are we going to go? Dad certainly doesn't want us back. Where will we live? What do you tell Axel when he finds out he can't come over anymore?" Sora questioned.

"I've started a plan for that. With the money I've saved for college and some left over money from our graduation party, we'll rent an apartment. I'll get a job and if you want, you can use your college money and go to a community college. We'll have mom bring our stuff over to our new apartment and we'll live that way. I want you to go to college though Sora. You need your future," Roxas explained.

"What about you? Don't you want to go to college?"

"I failed a grade and got held back. I don't think any college would want me. Why do you think we graduated at the same time Sora? I'll be twenty soon. I should've been in college already. You're smart if you try. You can still go. I'll try to help pay with the job I'll get, but we'll need money for rent and such."

"Oh yeah. You and Riku both failed a grade. I forgot you guys are my idiots! Anyway, I won't go to college if you don't. I'll get a job too! Then we can both pay off all that stuff. We're in this together big brother."

"Forever and always little brother. But you still need your education. You're going to college and that's final. Riku would want the same thing," Roxas smiled. Sora pouted and crossed his arms over his chest.

"What about Axel? How are you going to explain to him that you're not going to college with him? How are you going to explain why we're not living with our parents anymore?" Sora interrogated. Roxas wasn't even sure he had an answer to those.

"I-I'll break up with him. Sometime in the fall. That way he'll never have to know," Roxas stuttered. Sora only scoffed.

"Yeah right. You and Axel will not break up. You're meant to be. Like me and Rikki Kins! Look Rox, we'll get through this. Mom has our back and she told me how hard she's trying to get Dad to take us back. Maybe we will be able to go home after summer," Sora smiled. He was so optimistic it killed Roxas. A large knot formed in his stomach.

Cloud will never accept us. He'll never want us back. We're piles of shit to him. But Sora, he's so innocent and sweet. What if we can't find anywhere to live? What if I can't get a job? Will we end up on the streets? No. I won't allow that. I'll take care of my brother, Roxas thought. He looked down at the grinning boy and managed to crack a weak smile.

"I'll take care of you Sora. We're in this together. Nothing will let us down. We'll be okay," Roxas said, trying to be positive for him. Sora jumped up and leaped onto Roxas and wrapped his arms around him tightly. Surprised at the sudden hug, Roxas hugged his brother back warmly.

"I believe you Roxy. I love you," Sora whispered. Roxas winced at the use of Roxy. He was only letting Sora call him that because it kept his brother happy. No one else could call him that. One person already hurt so much.

"Love you too Sora. Come on, let's go cook dinner for everyone. I'll help you tonight," Roxas smiled.

"Yeah right Roxy! We both know you can't cook to save your life! Well, alright. I could use some help. When Riku says he'll do it, he doesn't really help at all. Let's go!" Sora said, pulling Roxas up. The blonde smiled at him and they ran into the house to go cook dinner for everyone.

Roxy. Just like that day when I nearly broke down again. When Riku called me that. He promised he wouldn't. How long ago was that? A week? Yeah, about a week. Man, July sure is flying by pretty fast. Anyway, that day I nearly lost it. Riku and I had another talk. Another very serious one, Roxas thought as he followed Sora into the kitchen.

O~o~O

"You did it. You promised me you wouldn't. Riku you made that promise hours ago. It hasn't even been a whole freaking day and you broke it. You called me by that name," Roxas snarled once he was safe behind the house. Hopefully no one could hear them.

"Roxas, I'm sorry alright? It's just that I'm so used to calling you by Ro-, uh, I mean, it. Cloud, Sora and I always called you it. Ever since we were little. How come Sora can still use it? Why not me?" Riku said, careful not to say Roxy again. Roxas was already steaming.

"Sora can say it because it keeps him happy. I want him to be happy. That's what my brother needs to be. If I have to endure emotional pain, then so be it! No one else can call me it. It hurts too much. My own father wants me dead Riku. Why would I want to be called by a nickname he gave me? Think you asshole. Think," Roxas snapped.

Riku winced and looked away. He didn't think about all the pain he'd cause Roxas by calling him that name. It was all Cloud's fault his best friend was hurting. It was Cloud's fault Roxas keeps having those nightmares. Everything was Cloud's fault.

"I don't want to hurt you Roxas. Never would I purposely hurt you. Look, let's make a new promise. I will never call you by it for as long as we live," Riku said, sticking out his pinky. Roxas looked at it in disgust, unsure if he could actually trust Riku. He just broke a promise. Who knows if he broke more before?

"Put your finger down. It's not happening," Roxas snarled. He crossed his arms over his chest and looked away from Riku. The blonde didn't want to meet his eyes. He'd just give in.

Riku walked over to him, grabbed his chin and forced him to look into his eyes. Once the gaze was locked, he grabbed Roxas' arms and forced them down. He then wrapped his arms around Roxas and hugged him tightly. The blonde was shocked, but hugged him back.

"It was only one promise Roxas. A stupid one that means nothing compared to the new one. Please, just grab onto my pinky. I'm sorry I hurt you," Riku whispered in his ear. He let go of Roxas, holding out his pinky again. A warm, friendly smile was spread on his face. Roxas looked at his face and then at his pinky before he sighed and locked pinkies again. Their promise was renewed and even stronger.

"Fine, let's just go join everyone. Look happy and pretend everything's cool. I'm still mad, but I'll get over it," Roxas huffed. He turned on his heel and marched away. Riku followed behind him, his hands behind his head and his grin even wider.

O~o~O

Roxas watched his brother zip around the kitchen, pulling out all kinds of stuff Roxas didn't even recognize. Some stuff Roxas never remembered anyone buying. Hopefully it didn't mean that it had been there before they all arrived. He felt sick to his stomach just thinking about that. The little brunette was humming as he zoomed around the kitchen. Roxas sat at the island, watching him move. He still had no clue what they were making.

"Sora, what the hell is all this for?" Roxas said, picking up some utensil that looking like it could be used as a murder weapon. Sora snorted and snatched it away from Roxas. There was no doubt the blonde would end up stabbing himself by accident.

"Stupid, that was a can opener. I'm making chicken and canned green beans. Maybe potatoes if I have time! I'm running on a tight schedule today. Although I'm only a few minutes behind, it's still behind!" Sora chuckled. He ran to the refrigerator and pulled out chicken breasts. Sora's chicken was delicious and already Roxas' stomach was yearning for it. He licked his lips and his blue eyes never stray from the package of chicken. Sora noticed this and frowned. He grabbed his wooden spoon and thumped him on the head.

Roxas yelped and rubbed his head. He muttered some not so nice things about his little brother under his breath. Sora just had a thing for beating them over the head with his wooden spoon. The little brunette glared at Roxas and pointed to the door.

"You suck at helping. Not to mention, you can't cook to save your life! You can bake, but that's about it!" Sora shouted. Roxas' jaw dropped and he pouted. He crossed his arms over his chest and looked at the ground.

"There's no difference between baking and cooking," Roxas huffed under his breath. He hoped Sora couldn't hear him, but he was wrong as always. The boy screeched and smacked Roxas in the head with the spoon again.

"Out! How dare you say there is no difference! There is too Roxy! Why don't you go flirt with Axel or something? You and Riku are officially banned from the kitchen when I'm cooking! If either of you two step foot in here before I'm done, you better hope I don't have a damn frying pan or a sharp object I could use to kill you with in my hands," Sora growled. His angry blue eyes told Roxas that he wasn't kidding. The blonde made a mad dash out of the kitchen and out the front door. He could hear his brother's evil cackles echo as he ran outside.

"Help! Sora's going to kill me!" Roxas screamed. He slammed the front door behind him and ran right for Axel. Axel tossed the football back to Riku effortlessly and opened his muscular arms wide open for Roxas. The blonde nearly tackled him down though. He wrapped his arms around Axel's small, and quite feminine, waist tightly. Roxas buried his face in Axel's chest and didn't let go. The redhead didn't even have a shirt on, so his skin was slick with sweat and it disgusted Roxas.

"What's this about you being murdered? Mess with Sora's schedule?" Riku said, walking over to them. He was laughing as he tossed the football towards the house. Axel placed his large hands on Roxas' lower back and laughed as he pulled him closer.

Roxas turned his head to glare at Riku and said, "You and I are not allowed in the kitchen when he's cooking. He said he'd kill us if we did. Apparently we distract him too much. I was going to help him, but, you know."

"Oh darn, so I can't go surprise him?" Riku frowned. Roxas sighed and held onto Axel. Riku grumbled and headed for the picnic table. "I'll just chill with Dem and Zex then!"

Axel watched Riku leave and he turned to look down at Roxas. He nudged him slightly and the blonde looked up at him. Axel smirked and tipped his head to the side. Roxas raised an eyebrow and glared up at him.

"C'mon Princess! There's a place I want to show you," Axel said, letting go of Roxas. The blonde stepped back and held out his hand. Axel laced his fingers in his and they took off running together. Riku shouted after them, but they ignored him.

Axel led Roxas right towards the woods. Roxas asked him a few times where they were going, but Axel just kept saying it was a surprise. This was seriously making Roxas very impatient and he was never one for surprises. He just sighed and went along with it. There was no clear path as to where they were going and that worried Roxas. They weren't even on a trail and it didn't even looked like Axel knew where they were going.

The house was getting farther and farther away and Roxas just prayed they didn't get lost. Axel better know where they were going. All Roxas could see was woods, woods, oh, more woods. Axel just kept saying that it was only a little bit further and Roxas should just relax.

"Look around for the tree with the carved heart in it. Then you'll know we're there," Axel said, scanning through the trees. Roxas wasn't exactly fond of running with flip-flops on. They weren't the easiest to run in and they were starting to slip off. Still, he looked for the tree with the heart on it. Hopefully it was coming up soon.

There wasn't too much more running before Axel shouted there it is! Roxas looked ahead and he saw the tree with the heart carved into it. There was also a pretty big bush in between it and another tree. Axel dropped Roxas' hand and ran for the bush. He pulled apart some of the branches and motioned for Roxas to walk through with a smile. The blonde frowned and was glad he had a shirt and longer shorts on. He didn't want to be poked and jabbed by sticks and thorns. Poor Axel was going to have a harder time going through.

Roxas sighed and pushed his way through the bush which wasn't all that wide or even prickly. He made it through to the other side easier than he thought. Pushing through the last of it, he stepped out into blinding sunlight. Being so used to the shaded area of the trees, he was shocked about how bright it got so quickly.

"Welcome to my sanctuary Princess," Axel whispered in Roxas' ear. Roxas jumped in surprise. He wasn't expecting Axel to be there already. He blinked his ocean blue eyes and looked around. It was a small clearing with soft green grass that moved with a very light breeze. Sunlight poured in from the top of the clearing. Trees surrounded the place, making it very secluded. Birds chirped quietly off in the distance. This really was a sanctuary. A sanctuary indeed.

"Wow, this place is so peaceful. Did you come here a lot?" Roxas asked, walking forward.

Axel shrugged and responded with, "When my parents drove me completely mad one time I just ran off into the woods and I saw this place. Carved that heart myself to be able to always find it. A place I go to that no one else knows about! Well, now other than you. You're the only person who knows about this place now my Princess."

Roxas blushed and grimaced at Axel's casual use of the nickname Princess. Better than Roxy, but annoying nonetheless. Two arms were then around the blonde's waist and a chin was on his shoulder. Roxas leaned back into Axel. He turned his head to face Axel and kiss his temple. Axel laughed lightly and squeezed his boyfriend.

"What a beautiful summer, huh Princess? Wish it didn't have to end soon. It's the seventeenth of July and we have to go back August eighth," Axel sighed. Roxas felt the knot form in his stomach. His whole conversation with Sora earlier flooded back to him. He still had no clue how he and his brother were going to live after summer.

"Yeah, it sucks. It's been a nice summer," Roxas lied. In truth, it was the worst summer he had ever gone through. The only good thing about it was all the quality time and freedom he had with Axel. When Axel visited him at home, they had to act like best friends instead of boyfriends if his father was home. Then if his dad wasn't home, they were still careful in case he came home early. Obviously Riku and Sora weren't so careful. The freedom felt nice.

Axel laughed in his ear and without Roxas expecting it; he yanked him backwards and fell on his back with Roxas landing on him. The blonde yelped in fear and thumped Axel in the bare chest once he could control his heartbeat. Axel kept him snuggled close, still laughing, as they lay in the grass together.

"Not cool Axel. Not cool. You almost gave me a heart attack!" Roxas scolded. Axel just rolled his jade eyes and flicked Roxas' small nose. Roxas growled and snatched up Axel's hand. He interlocked their fingers so that Axel couldn't hit his nose again.

"So Princess, I've got a question to ask you," Axel asked after a long moment of silence. Roxas was actually enjoying the peacefulness and was a little mad Axel interrupted it. Sighing he looked up at Axel.

"What in the world could you possibly ask me?"

"I want you to move in with me after the summer is over."

Did his ears deceive him? Roxas couldn't believe it. Did Axel really just ask Roxas to move in with him? With Axel's parents who make it quite obvious they do not like Roxas? What if Roxas said yes? Then what would happen to Sora? Surely he could live with Riku, but it wasn't fair to dump Sora onto Riku. Besides, Roxas promised to Sora he'd always take care of him. That he'd always be there for him.

"Y-You want me to m-move in? Don't your parents h-hate me?" Roxas stuttered. He was very disappointed with himself. The blonde could not talk properly.

Axel snickered quickly and then realized Roxas was being serious. He said, "They do not hate you. They just, I don't know, approve of you. They think you're too pessimistic for me, but Princess, everyone thinks that. My folks do understand I'm madly in love with you. They said it would be alright if you moved in with us. You're always talking about how you hate how we can't do what we want in your house. You know, because of your dad. That's what got me thinking. We've been together for a really long time, we're both adults and we both want to be together. My parents accept us fully even if they think you're negative as hell. So, what do you say?"

What do I say? What do I say to all that? I really like Axel and I know he says he's in love with me, but I'm not in love back. Would it be appropriate for us to move in together straight out of high school? Roxas thought. He closed his eyes and pictured two scenarios.

One included a life with Axel. He was living in Axel's room and he didn't interact with his parents much. Roxas imagined hanging with Axel's family and Axel's aunt pinching his butt over and over. Sora was living with Riku happily and Sora went to culinary school like he always wanted. Riku had a job and he and Sora were perfectly happy without Roxas. He imagined never seeing Sora or Riku or even his mom ever again. That could happen if he moved in with Axel.

The other one included Sora and Roxas living in a run down, cheap apartment with only one bedroom. They didn't have much food in the place and the apartment was incredibly small. Roxas was working two jobs, day and night. Sora also had a job and only saw Riku ever so often. Roxas wasn't with Axel in this scenario. No family and he barely had friends. It was just him and Sora. That could happen if he and Sora got a place with each other.

"I-I don't know Axel. Give me time to think about it, 'kay?" Roxas said after a while. Axel leaned down and kissed his forehead lightly. Roxas opened his eyes again and blue locked with green.

"Take all the time in the world Princess. My offer will always stand," Axel smiled cheekily.

Roxas closed his eyes again and snuggled even closer to Axel. They just laid in the grass, holding each other and enjoying each other's company. Roxas could easily nap in Axel's arms just like that. He felt safe, warm, loved. Sighing happily, Roxas squeezed Axel's hand.

"I love you my Princess."

He didn't even bother responding.

O~o~O

That night, Roxas woke up in Axel's arms. No nightmare, but he just woke up anyway. Grumbling, he shut his eyes and hoped he could fall back asleep. Axel's arms were always the most comfortable place to sleep in. He didn't even have a nightmare! Why did he have to wake up?

No use. I still can't sleep. Of fucking course, Roxas thought angrily. He carefully lifted up Axel's arm and slid out of bed. Dressed in an overlarge tee shirt and his boxers, Roxas slinked out of his room and down the stairs. He stretched out his arms as he reached the landing.

The front door was wide open. Now Sora always made sure all windows and doors were shut before he goes to bed. He was very picky about that sort of thing. So there was no way this was open before Sora went to bed. Someone was awake and outside.

Roxas pushed open the screen door and walked out on the porch. Silver hair stood out against the dark night. Of course it was him who was also awake. Riku turned around and grinned at Roxas, his aqua eyes glowing. The blonde smiled back and sat with Riku on the porch stairs. He propped himself on his elbows, sitting only one step below Riku. Roxas looked up at him, still smiling.

"At least I'm not the only one awake," Roxas laughed.

"Sora was kicking in his sleep and it made me wake up. I'll let him get all his kicks out before I climb back into bed with him. I don't need any bruises," Riku said.

"I just randomly woke up in Axel's arms. Pissed me off because I was actually having a good dream. No nightmare, can you believe it?"

"Same here. I was having one of the best dreams in a while."

"What were you dreaming about Riku?"

The silver haired one froze up and didn't respond right away. Instead, he looked away, not wanting to meet Roxas' eyes. The blonde nudged his knee and repeated his question, but Riku didn't respond either. He huffed out a sigh and turned to look at the moon's reflection on the water. The water was completely still and dark. Roxas couldn't see much other than the top of the lake. Everything else was too dark to see.

"I was dreaming about you, Roxas."

Roxas kept repeating that in his head. He kept repeating it because he couldn't believe it. Riku was having a good dream and it was about Roxas. Not Sora. Not Riku's beloved boyfriend. No, it was about the brother of the boyfriend.

"W-What was that?" Roxas stammered, still in disbelief. He looked up at Riku with wide blue eyes. The other boy looked down at him, but made a growling noise in the back of his throat and looked away quickly.

He buried his face in his hands and murmured, "Don't look at me with those eyes."

Puzzled, Roxas asked, "What eyes?"

"Your brother's eyes. It's making me feel guilty."

"Riku, what happened in your dream?"

Sighing, Riku removed his hands from his face. He rubbed his eyes with the back of his hands. Roxas just hoped they weren't tears he was wiping away. The blonde put a comforting hand on Riku's knee. A way of him saying that it was okay to tell him.

"Remember us? The 'us' from middle school. You know, when we were actually together. That year and a half we were dating. Not something people would expect two middle school boys to do, but it happened. Stop denying it Roxas. You know you think about that time too. Don't keep lying to me and saying you don't! Do you know how bad I feel when I think about this? I'm dating your brother for Christ's sake! We broke up because I fell in love with your brother. You were devastated, but we worked it out. That's why we're so close Rox. Because of that time. Every now and then I dream about it. Like tonight. I dreamed of us. Really, I shouldn't still be thinking about it, but I do," Riku admitted. His voice sounded like he was on the verge of tears, but he was right. Roxas did think about it.

They were so happy. Confident in their sexuality at such a young age, but they knew it was damn true. Roxas and Riku really liked each other and they did date at the end of seventh grade and all through eighth grade. That's when Riku and Sora started becoming friends and soon enough, Riku fell in love with Sora. Roxas was left brokenhearted and alone, but they got through it. They remained best friends for high school. Then Axel came into his life and that empty hole Riku had caused was slowly being repaired by Axel. Axel couldn't fill it entirely. There was something that kept Roxas from loving Axel with all of his heart. Something or someone still lingered there and in his mind. Not that Roxas would ever admit it.

"Riku, we swore to never talk about it. Remember? We can't hurt Sora or Axel. It's our darkest secret Riku. You're right. I do think about back then, but we're adults now. We both have moved on, right?" Roxas said softly.

"What if we didn't?" Riku whispered back. "What if I still really like you Roxas? What if you still really like me? Where does that leave us?"

That leaves us in one hell of a situation, Roxas thought sadly. He couldn't admit it. He'd never admit it…

Author's Note

OH MY GOD. THIS. I'M SO SORRY. I've been so distracted by cosplaying, roleplaying, gaiaonline, and playing KH. I NEARLY FORGOT THIS.

But then I remember today/yesterday (whenever this gets uploaded) is/was AkuRoku day and then I'm like...

Oh sh*t. I need a chapter uploaded before my readers kill me.

So I tried to make this Axel x Roxas centered, but it surely didn't come out that way. Sadly. ;~;

I did give you guys a bit of fluff in the middle. :3 SO YOU CAN'T KILL ME. :3

Anyway, I was originally going to make this a filler chapter, but then I'm like...

No. No more fillers. We need to get the plot moving!

So, that's where the end of this chapter came from. I'm sorry if it's not what you guys were expecting. ;~;

BUT I NEED DRAMA & TO GET THIS PLOT KICK STARTED.

So, what are everyone's thoughts on Riku's & Roxas' whole situation? Personally... well. Then I'd just spoil everything by giving my input, huh? ;)

But I want to know what you guys think.

Leave a review saying your opinions on their relationship for this fic! COOKIES FOR ALL WHO DO.

Anyway, sorry for disappearing. Also, these chapters will start to get longer. How does that sound? ;)

ALSO. IF YOU FOLLOW FLAWS MAKE YOU PERFECT I PROMISE I'LL UPDATE IT THIS WEEK.

If you haven't started my fic Flaws Make You Perfect I suggest you catch up now! ALRIGHT. I'LL STOP THE SELF ADVERTISING. ;~;

Sierra, you can't say anything about my self advertising. You've been there since WA & you know the whole deal. XD

Okay, I'm done. Toodles my dears! Stay cool.

Review & favorite!~