Sooooo,
this is my brand new story. More punk goodness for you all. THis is a little different the POV's will switch between 2 ppl. so enjoy, let me know what you think.
disclaimer: anything you recognize is more than likely not mine.
Addict- 1/?
Summary: One day you think your life is over, that you've completely and utterly ruined it. Then something changes and you have hope again. Sounds like a cheesy movie right? Yeah, that's not what happened here, instead you appeared and you're holier than thou attitude was enough to drive me insane. You think you're better than me because of where I am? It's on.
... ... ...
Teddy
"Teddy? It's time."
I looked up at the voice, rolling my eyes as I grudgingly got to my feet. I followed the nurse down the hallway and into the room where the doctor was currently waiting for me. Sitting down on the edge of the couch, I warily stared at the doctor across from me, a notepad on her lap, her hand poised to write.
"And how are you feeling today, Teddy?"
I sighed and shrugged my shoulders.
"Do you feel better today?"
I tilted my head to the side, contemplating the question before slowly nodding my head.
"That's good, do you feel up to talking today?"
This time I shook my head and the doctor sighed.
"Teddy, we are very pleased with your progress here. Physically you are much better, and you are almost qualified for our outpatient program, but the fact that you have not spoken a word since being in here is still a cause for concern."
I shrugged, finally settling back onto the couch as I drew my knees up to my chin, wrapping my arms around them. I knew I would be here for awhile as she lectured me about opening up and talking again. It was the same old song and dance and if I was willing to talk, I would be mimicing her word for word, I knew it off by heart. Then again, if I was willing to talk, there would be no need for this lecture in the first place.
I was very well and capable of talking, I just chose not to. I can't say what exactly made me stop talking, but it happened the day I was forced to be here. It was either this or jail. Jail wasn't too appealing and as much as I did not want to come here, I soon realized this was what I needed. I was a mess, drugs had gotten the best of me and if I didn't stop and get help, I would end up dead. That wasn't appealing either.
Being in rehab was all about detoxing and getting to the route of the problem. Why did I end up where I was, what led to my addiction? But with me unwilling to talk, that never happened and it frustrated the doctors and the shrinks to no end. They knew I could talk, there was nothing saying I couldn't but up until now I stayed quiet. Even during my detoxing when I was dealing with withdrawals. All I remembered was it being a dark scary time and going through just that was enough to make me not want to return to my old habits for fear of having to go to rehab agaiin and experiencing withdrawals.
Just because I did't talk about it out loud, didn't mean I didn't know what had caused this. I made bad life choices, that was it, that was all. It started at a party, me giving into peer pressure, and then my highly addictive personality took over and my life was soon on the fast track to destruction. I failed out of college, I was fired from my job, I was stealing money from my parents and then one day I was apprehended by cops with drugs on me. I should've been in jail but with my father's money I became part of some new program where they tried to rehabilitate first time offenders before the penalties became harsher. But when I was arrested, that was when I realized I couldn't keep living like this, I needed to get my life together.
So why didn't I cooperate more? I don't know, I think it was more that I was punishing myself and until I was done and ready to forgive myself, I didn't want anyone else to forgive me.
I tuned back in, just as the doctor was finishing up today's lecture and ran a hand through my shaggy brown hair. It used to be long but I remember cutting it during a really bad trip one time. And not just cutting it, but hacking it off. It wasn't until I ended up here that someone tried to fix it and I was letting it grow out again, it was just in that awkward shaggy stage and sticking up in the back.
"Teddy? Did you hear me?"
I looked at her, flashing a guilty look at her. The doctor just sighed and shook her head.
"There is a special guest speaker coming in today He will be talking to the group about his choices and lifestyle and I feel it will be beneficial for you to go."
I nodded wondering who it was this time. We did get the occasional motivational speaker but so far no one had really caught my interest.
"That's all for today then Teddy." The doctor told me with a small smile as she closed the book. "Please be in the meeting room at 3 PM for the speaker and I hope you can open up one day soon to somebody."
I gave her a weak smile as I stood up and hurried back to my room, jumping onto my bed and curling onto my side, reaching out for my stuffed horse, Phillip. I don't know why he was called that. When I got him all those years ago, I guess I decided he looked like a Phillip and kept that name ever since.
There was only a half hour to kill before the speaker and I spent that on my bed, just staring at the wall. I wasn't very sociable to begin with and now wasn't any different. I didn't move until I saw the clock on my bedside table hit five minutes to three. I got up, gently puttng Phillip back on my pillow before I slowly walked down to the meeting room.
Upon entry, there was only a couple chairs left and I picked one at the back, slightly away from everyone else. No one really noticed me anyways but today, the guys in the room seemed to be buzzed with excitement as they whispered in a small group. Even some of the girls seemed to be tidied up a bit more than usual. Some of them had makeup on and I wrinkled my nose in distate. For god sake's we're in a rehab center, why the makeup? It's not like we were going to meet anyone.
"Can everyone please get settled." Nurse Valerie asked, a small excited smile on her face as she watched up.
It took a few moments for everyone to calm down and I tried to figure out what all the buzz and excitement was about.
"I know some of you had heard who our special guest is today and we are very happy he was able to make the time to come speak to all of you. So, all the way from the WWE, allow me to introduce CM Punk."
The cheering was enthusiastic as a man entered the room a small smile on his face. I knew what the WWE was but no I didn't watch it, wrestling was so fake and never held my interest so I didn't recognize him at all. He had black, slicked back hair and a scruffy beard and a lip piercing and I could see tattoo's on his neck and behind his ears. He was wearing a black zip up hoodie over a white thirt with a red and black logo and loose fitting jeans, his hands in the pocket of the hoodies. He sat down in a chair across from us, looking us all over.
"Thanks for having me here. As you all know, the WWE has had many wrestlers in rehab unfortunately and that's because of the tough life style we live. But I can say I will never be one of those people. For those that don't know, my name is CM Punk, WWE champion and I'm straight edge. I chose this lifestyle and it's how I live." He held up his hands, showing letters on his knuckles. "I'm drug free, I don't drink, and I don't do promiscuous sex. I know you think i'm here to preach to you guys about what I do is the right thing and to lure you over to the "good" side but really, I'm only hear to answer any questions you might have about why I do, and to help you guys if you so choose to."
Was this guy for real? Not here to preach? Not even five minutes into it and that's exactly how it seemed to me. I don't blame New Hope, my rehab center, for getting motivational speakers, I mean, it does help some people but sometimes people did come off as preaching and sometimes, certain speakers made it seems as though they were better than us, kind of like this guy was doing.
I unintentionally let out a huge yawn as the guy kept talking. CM Punk, I think his name was?
"I'm sorry, am I boring you?"
I stopped mid yawn, my mouth wide open, my eyes also wide as I stared at the speaker. Realizing how foolish I looked, I snapped my mouth shut, feeling my face go bright red.
"If you don't care what I have to say you are welcome to leave."
"I-uh, no, sorry, I didn't mean to."
Everyone in the room, from the Doctors, to nurses, to the patients, all turned to stare at me in complete shock. It was then I realized I had spoken my first words in almost three months.