I'm in love with a stripper.

Lights shinned across the tile floor as Sideswipe sat in a red chair. The sides of the chair wrapped around his form, as if someone had cut a forth of the ball that now was used for the chair. Sipping on some energon he leaned into the chair, his right ankle on top his left knee. Bouncing his knee impatiently he waited for the show to begin. Lights eventually light up a black glass stage. The lights reflected off the glass as a thin blue femme as she strolled across the stage. Her light blue and pink form brightening up the dark stage with her bright colors; slowly he pulled his drink away from his mouth as his jaw unhinged. The small femme grabbed onto a long metal pole, walking around it before rubbing her back side into it. Music started to vibrate the floor as he felt the slow bass of it through his body.

"Got the body of a goddess..."

Gaping like a fish out of water his eyes trailed up her body. This was always the highlight of his days. To see this beauty dance, even if he didn't like what she did for a living he never complained. Walking away from the pole the femme lay on the floor running her hands down her body; Sideswipe's eyes following her hands. Getting back up she grabbed back onto the pole and swung her legs away from the ground. Her legs opened as she swung around the pole with grace; carefully switching her legs upward into a V-shape as she still swung around. Her aft was facing the floor as she still circled the pole. Moving her hands down she let one of her legs wrap around the pole. Swinging herself around the pole up-side down now, he leaned forward in fear that she would fall.

"'Cause I'm in love with a stripper. She poppin', she rollin', she rollin'…"

Getting down she walked off the stage and towards him. Her hips flickering as she walked over. His spark stalled as he saw her coming forwards. His hands shook more and more as she got closer.

"I'm not goin' nowhere, girl, I'm stayin'…"

Upon reaching him her lips spread across her face as she smiled wickedly down at him. Letting her body drop onto his lap, he groaned in appreciation. His hands went up to touch her hip before she grabbed his wrists and put his hands on her breast. A smile broke out across his face as he touched her. Rubbing his shoulders she leaned into him and nipped his collar. Groaning, he moved his hands down her body to grab her aft. Moving to look at him in the eyes he noticed that she didn't look happy. Opening her mouth he was shocked at what she said.

"Get this fragger off me!"

Groaning, he slowly on-lined his optics only to stare down at the blue femme from his dreams. Still reeling from the dream he smiled down at her and kissed her.

"You're a wonderful stripper." He whispered romantically. Or, what he though was a romantic thing to say at the moment. A fist collided with his face as he stumbled away from the blue and pink femme. Snapping out from his daze he looked at a furious purple femme. Well he more like assumed she was pissed since he couldn't see her face. The box was still stuck on her somehow. Her shoulders were tensed and her door-wings in a V-shape.

"That's my sister in case you forgot!" She yelled at him shaking a fist. Getting off the floor the femme brushed away invincible dirt on her frame. Glaring at the Silver mech, the blue femme's battle mask fell over her face. Her swords slid out from her wrists and a pang of fear made its way into his spark. Hearing a gun cock beside him he froze. Shifting a glance to the boxed femme he gulped. Her arm had already transformed into her plasma gun.

"Your wonderful stripper is giving you to the count of 5, Sideswipe." The blue femme snarled. Quickly taking the chance to escape he transformed and sped off. Transforming as well the two femmes took off after him.

Sam sat on top of the table witnessing the whole thing. Punching his shoulder in annoyance he turned and looked at Mikeala.

"Never again are you daring Sideswipe to eat Twinkies." She hissed.

A/N: So I heard this song on the radio and I thought it would be great to have Sideswipe hallucinate to it all because he ate twinkies and crashed since his body isn't supposed to eat human food. It probably wasn't the greatest story I've ever written but it'll do. I also don't know how strippers dance so I looked up Dirty Dancer by Enrqiue Iglesias and got the dancing from that. I got bored and so i did this very quickly sorry it's so short