A/N: "Flirting With Guard Number Three" is finally finished! I hope all of you enjoyed it! This last chapter is dedicated to everyone. ;)

daemonkieran: lol I'm not even sure how I came up with that pacman stuff, but I figured it would be something silly for Harry to say. I'm glad that you liked it.

Tokugawa Blitzer: I think there are too many ninjas for Harry to even count. Aww! You should have hope for Harry's plan. Hope you like this chapter!

joytiger: I'm glad that you thought chapter eight was funny! I can't imagine how difficult it would be for me to read a ff story in a different language, so I'm very happy that you decided to give my story a shot!

Pegaz: haha I really like the ninjas, too. Maybe somebody should write a side story from the ninja's point of view.

danniperson: Thanks for the brownies and cookies! They were absolutely delicious. I hope your brother wasn't too confused by your giggles.

Lady DestinyHope: I think that Harry might be having a mental breakdown because of chemistry, and the ninjas are his way of handling all of his stress and anxiety. In all reality, I'm not exactly sure why Harry is so obsessed with ninjas, either.

MareG8: Yep! You called it! Thanks for pointing out the error. I guess I was thinking so quickly that my fingers typed precede when my brain was thinking proceed. I have now fixed my mistake!

sev's-sexy-mistress: I have no clue where I come up with this stuff, but I am glad that it was funny enough to make you laugh. :)

marksmom: Thanks for reviewing! I guarantee you that Harry is more than aware that Severus has just confessed. Enjoy this chapter!

ShadowsofaDarkSlytherin: lol Yes. It is happy again. Will it end happily?

sm1982: Yes, it does seem as if Harry gets answers right when he realizes that he gain something by doing so. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

kaja1234: You guessed correctly the first time. I'm so happy that you liked Severus's confession. :)

Luv 2 cry: That's great to hear that you thought Severus's rant suited him. I was worried that it would be too OOC. Thanks for the review!

Sithtar: I'm glad that you stopped being angry after chapter 8. Please enjoy this next chapter!

Hedwig-hoots: Thanks so much! I'm happy that Severus confessed, too. Now Harry and Severus finally know that they love each other.

: haha I love all of your reviews. They always make me so happy! I really appreciate you writing a review for all of the other chapters. I totally wasn't expecting that. I know that you've sent me 2 other messages, but I will reply to those through private messaging if that is all right with you.

Simply Alex: Don't be sad! This chapter will be the chapter where everything finally comes together. I am just like you. I typically avoid reading ongoing stories (mostly because I want to be sure that the author will finish it before I get too attached), so I feel honored that you chose to read my story despite it being incomplete. Good guess about Harry's mysterious plans, by the way.

Nocturnal Rose: Thanks for reviewing! Please enjoy the final chapter!
AlmondWithUnicornHair: Thanks! I warn you that you have not yet seen the last of Harry and his chocolate obsession. ;)

Misa-chan96: lol I'm glad that chapter 8 roused a "YIPPEE" out of you. I hope you're equally excited about chapter 9.

Serpent91: Thanks! I'm happy to hear that you liked it!

LemonDropsWoolSocks: That's a very good point. We only got to see Severus in his uniform for a short amount of time. That's kind of a bummer now that I think about it…Hope you enjoy chapter 9!

Bakanika: Yes, they are fine with the US version. I agree with you, though. The BBC one seems more natural. It's exactly how I would picture Sherlock behaving in the present times. The US version, on the other hand, has more action and violence than I think Doyle would approve of. Thanks for reviewing!

"Have I ever told you how much I love you," Harry crooned softly.

Harry saw Severus roll his eyes, but he was being serious. The love he felt was almost incomparable. So comforting, so sweet, always there when he needed help…What more could the brunette ask for?

"If you truly love your chocolate chip pancakes that much, Potter, you should probably stop suffocating them with syrup," Severus suggested as readjusted himself on the kitchen stool. "Personally, I don't care to clean up after our homicides, either."

Frowning, the college student looked down to inspect the condition of his breakfast. "What are you talking about? They're loving their bath," he claimed confidently, watching a brown flood rush over the edges of his pancake stack. "They're practically receiving spa services for free. Don't you see how happy they are?"

Severus lifted his head up to the ceiling and took a long breath. "There are moment when I wonder where my brain escaped to when I agreed to this ridiculous plan of yours," he mumbled, more to himself than to Harry.

Personally, Harry didn't understand why his boyfriend was complaining. Sure, many things had changed since their visit to Starbucks, but it had all been for the better. Eventually, the brunette had managed to convince Severus to stay in town with him. Against Hermione's suggestions, Harry flew back to Britain with Severus to help him pack up all of his things. It had been a short trip, yet the future doctor had really enjoyed himself. For one, he got to make a trip down to Molly's and got the guard to pay for 8 (yes, you read correctly) chocolate chip scones. It just so happened that the owner had been so pleased with the young man's chocolate appetite that she crowned Harry and Severus as honorary customers. Now, anyone who walked into the bakery would see a picture of a grinning foreigner clutching onto the arm of a brooding British man. The picture hung proudly behind the cash register, and Harry promised himself that he'd come back to the wonderful bakery very soon.

The packing itself had been fairly quick seeing as how the black-haired man had very few possessions. After that was finished, Harry accompanied his boyfriend to Buckingham Palace as he said goodbye to his superiors. While Severus was talking to them, Harry got the chance to meet Sirius Black, who turned out to be good company.

On the flight back, all they had were four medium-sized suitcases, three of which were filled with science texts. It was pitiful, if you asked Harry for his opinion. Three suitcases of chemistry magazines, biology journals, and physics textbooks? That was basically a decade's worth of military supplies for the Ninjas. In fact, when he offered to carry one of the bags, his hand had burned excruciatingly. Severus thought that he was being delusional, but Harry saw the burn for what it was: a sign of the Ninjas at work.

Before Harry knew it, the semester had come to an end. Severus had tried to help. He really had. It just seemed like the former guard's lips were a thousand time more important than classifying chemical reactions. With time, Severus realized that trying to get his boyfriend to see "reason" was hopeless, and he too gave in. For that reason, two very important things happened.

First, Ron started getting uncomfortable walking into his flat and seeing his mate snogging Severus every day after school. He had also become convinced that his laundry flaws were not his fault but rather the fault of the apartment building's laundry machines. Now, Hermione and Ron were renting a flat five blocks away and still trying to figure out why the young man was so laundry-cleaning challenged.

The move had been bittersweet. On one hand, all of Severus's devilish textbooks had been moved out of Harry's room, which meant that he could now sleep soundly without any nightmares. On the other hand, Harry would really miss having his two mates around. Without Hermione and Ron, there would be no more pink sheets, no more midnight runs to the grocery store to restock after Ron's "snacks," and no more complaints from Draco who now felt as if the flat was an extension to his own. The only thing that really stayed constant was The Dreaded Room. While there was no long annoying giggles coming from the bedroom, it was still a place to be avoided. Severus had renovated the room and converted it into his own personal laboratory. Even though Harry had yet to step a foot inside, he pictured various spider webs decorating the corners, a wall lined with bookshelves, a lab table holding blazing Bunsen burners and toxic concoctions, and an unconscious Frankenstein restrained in a wooden chair (those groans had to be coming from somewhere…). It was basically the Ninja's utopia and Harry's purgatory.

The second important thing that resulted from Harry's snogging sessions was his less than spectacular grades. As Severus had predicted, Harry had royally failed his final organic chemistry xame, consequently failing the entire course. It had been a big blow to the brunette who had still hoped to pass the class with a C-. Thankfully, others had also struggled with the mysterious language of chemistry, and the university had announced an intensive organic chemistry class that would be offered to students over Spring Break. At first, it felt like a Godsend.

Now, Harry wasn't too sure. He was going to get back his midterm today, and he was extremely nervous, hence the chocolate chip pancakes.

"I don't know why you keep doing this, Potter," Severus admitted. "You do this every time. When will you realize that chocolate cannot fix all of your problems? You were born with an impeccably small cranium, and chocolate can't help it grow. The quicker you accept this, the easier it will be for you to move on."

Harry rolled his eyes, figuring that Severus was just annoyed because he had had to wake up early and make the pancakes himself. The man could complain all he wanted about Harry's love for chocolate, but he was just as guilty for feeding Harry's addiction. When Harry needed his chocolate fix, Severus always had a stash of Snickers at hand. When Harry went to bed feeling anxious, he would wake up in the morning to a plate of chocolate chip pancakes. Why was the former guard doing all of this? Because NOBODY wanted to see Harry during his moments of chocolate withdrawal. To put things simply, he turned into a different man.

"Without chocolate, we might not have gotten together," Harry argued.

"And how did you reach that absurd conclusion?"

"If you hadn't bought me that scone, I probably wouldn't have stayed at Molly's to talk with you."

Severus laughed. "Don't kid yourself, Potter. You stood in front of Buckingham Palace for hours trying to make me say or do something. There is no way that you would have left the café just because you didn't have your precious scone."

Harry shook his head in disagreement. "I didn't know who you were then, so that doesn't count."

The older man smirked. "Really? Because I think you're just naturally attracted to me." He leaned in closer and captured Harry's eyes.

"Are you flirting with me," the brunette asked hesitantly.

Severus raised an eyebrow. "Oh, how could I have forgotten? You still think that flirting means telling random jokes to complete strangers."

The brunette pouted. "I hope you realize that you get way too confident when you drink cappuccino."

The coffee addict smirked again.

The brunette blinked at the paper in front of him. How in God's name did he end up with a -15 out of 100? Was that even possible?

"Draco, what the bloody hell is this," Harry questioned in fury, glaring at the young man standing at the front of the room.

The Teacher's Assistant raised a waxed eyebrow. "What? You were wearing corduroy pants last Wednesday. Did you honestly expect to get away with that without any kind of punishment," the blonde asked with a snort. "Don't be so naïve."

Harry was outraged! Draco had been his friend. In the past few weeks, he had stopped by their flat countless time, claiming Severus's unused closet as his own and redecorating their living room to meet his standards. Had Harry complained about Draco's invasion of privacy? No. He just stuffed a Milky Way into his mouth and tired his best to get out of the fashion diva's way. What use would there be in arguing with Draco in his flat when he'd just have to face him in class the very next morning? This was his last chance to pass organic chemistry and stay on track, so Harry had tried really hard not to upset the TA. And for what? He slips up one time, and the blonde has condemned him for life.

Realizing that Draco would have no sympathy for his case, he turned his head towards the professor. "Whawdxx," Harry growled, too upset to come up with legitimate words.

The professor looked up from the papers on his desk with his hands steepled. "I'm sorry, Mr. Potter. Does there seem to be a problem?"

"Yes, Professor," he hissed. "I studied for hours for this extended quiz."

"Don't you mean exam, Potter," the blonde teased.

Despite himself, his body froze up. The remaining students in the room fought to get out of the room. They'd all had classes with Harry before and were well aware of how…unstable the brunette got upon hearing that dreaded word. It was even worse than when he came to class without his M&M stash. As such, they scampered out of McWright Hall as fast as they could.

When the last student left, Severus spoke up once again.

"It is my suggestion that you study for another hour, then. Your score was the lowest of the class. If you want to pass this class, I highly recommend that you spend more time with your books. You are free to visit Draco's office hours if the material is too troublesome. He is a very intelligent and capable young man who will be more than able to answer any of your questions."

That was enough to make Harry snap out of his trance. "You didn't even want him around me until I brought him over to the flat," the brunette pointed out heatedly.

It was true, too. At the start, Severus had hated the blonde with a passion. Nonetheless, Harry had firmly believed that the two would get along if they just tried. And he had been right. After inviting Draco over for dinner one night, the former guard and the Hillbilly-hater became "mates." Essentially, Severus had learned to respect Draco, and Draco had come to terms with the fact that Harry's boyfriend was real. Before Harry knew it, the blonde had asked to assist Severus with his new class and the older man had accepted.

"I don't see how that is relevant," Severus drawled.

"Sev, I'm telling you that I really tried to do well, and I can't just sit back and let Draco sabotage my life over one fashion mistake!"

"Don't forget the blackmail," Draco added, nodding his head at the older man. "You threatened to expose him as a pedophile, in case you don't remember."

Oh. So that's how it was. Severus was a part of this, too. "You're in on this, too," he questioned for verification.

"I don't know what you are blabbering about, Mr. Potter," Severus replied unconvincingly.

"You know, I always thought it was too good to be true. How could you possibly forgive me and my friends that quickly? Have you been plotting this ever since I introduced you to the dean," he asked, clearly hurt by what he considered extreme betrayal. And then it suddenly dawned on him. "No, no. Severus, I don't know if you can hear me in there, but the Ninjas have taken over your body. Now don't panic. I've got this covered. I won't let those Ninjas take you away from me!"

As Harry started a slow advance towards the beginning the room, he saw the two other men exchange a look. Obviously, they were planning a counterattack, but this was one battle that Harry was not going to lose. He may not have ever read "Sherlock Holmes," but he had seen the movie adaptations enough times to have mastered Robert Downey Jr.'s skillful moves and advanced fighting techniques…or so he hoped.

"Harry," Severus said as the young man came closer. "Harry, I have not been possessed."

A manic laugh escaped from Harry's mouth. "You Ninjas are full of lies," he spat, stopping to adopt an offensive fighting position.

"Potter, that is Severus," Draco said, rolling his eyes. "Bloody hell. If you can't remember to take your meds every morning…"

Harry narrowed his eyes at the blonde. "How do I know that you aren't one of them?"

"You're wearing your glasses, aren't you? Do you honestly believe that somebody could take over all of this," Draco bragged, gesturing to himself with his right hand.

The brunette shook his head. Nobody, no matter how hard they tried, could ever be as cocky and self-confident as Draco Malfoy – even if they did posses his body. "But how can you tell if Sev is really himself," he argued, curling his hands into fists.

"Show him the papers," Severus demanded, a hint of urgency in his voice as Harry got even closer.

"But we'll spoil all of the fun," the blonde whined. "I've been planning this all weekend."

"Draco, the papers!"

With a groan, the TA snatched a manila file folder from the corner of the professor's desk and tossed it at the brunette.

Again, Harry found himself struggling to come up with the proper words to express himself as he saw his real grade. "I can't…What? How? Where? Why? When? Who? W-what?"

"Articulate as always, Potter," Severus commented.

The brunette continued his incoherent ramblings as he took a seat.

"Come on, Potter. We don't have all day. I took the honors of organizing a party to celebrate your first A in chemistry," Draco said before noticing that Harry wasn't paying attention. "Potter, if we don't leave this very instant, the delivery man is going to return the chocolate fountain back to the store."

That was enough to make Harry look over at the blonde. "But what are we going to do about them," he whispered, dropping his head to stare down at the ground.

Draco and Severus shared another look of confusion. "About who," they both asked in unison.

"The Ninjas," he replied quietly, his eyes widening with glee. "I never knew there were so many."

The professor and TA tried to figure out what the student was seeing, but all they saw was an ugly tile floor. They could only imagine what was going on in Harry's mind.

"They are all gone now," the brunette continued, his shoulders relaxing and his heartbeat slowing down.

The Ninjas were dead; he was passing organic chemistry, and he was dating the man of his dreams. Harry couldn't recall a time where he had been any happier. And then he remembered...

"Wait a second. Did you say something about a chocolate fountain?"

A/N: It feels so good to have completed another ff story completed! I hope that I disappointed none of you with my ending. I doubt that I will write another story in the near future, but I do have some ideas for story ideas that I might post online for others to use.

Also, somebody told me that thought it was annoying having to scroll through all of the replies to people's comments. If any of you felt the same way, please let me know. As a solution to the problem, I am considering just listing all of the reviewers for each chapter and leaving out my replies. I just wanted to show publicly how much I appreciate all of my reviewers and care about what they think.

I'll miss all of you guys! Thanks so much for reading my story!

Marginal Benefits