A/N: And the author said "let there be smut!" and there was pwp of uncertain magnitude and skill, for the author was Blood Bathing at the time and the only sleep to be had was quick naps during updates. The author looked down upon the creation and said, "Whelp, it's not gonna get any better during the Blood Bath" and thusty uploaded it to fanfiction and Live Journal.

America sighed as he eased himself down into the warm water. He was so glad that he'd gotten to pick the hotel this time. Technically he was supposed to stay at his own apartment, but who was his boss to tell him that he couldn't sleep with his boyfriend while he was visiting?

England sighed as he looked up from his paperwork, "I still don't get why I couldn't just stay with you."

"What's wrong with this hotel?"

"It's just." He set his pen down and leaned back, "Hotels are so impersonal. I'd prefer to stay somewhere that somebody actually lives."

"Oh, baby, you know my house is a mess. Besides," he tapped the water so that it made a light splashing sound, "I got you a room with a fucking hot tub!"

England looked over with an expression that showed he was clearly unimpressed.

"Come on! Hey, I know," He smiled over at England, "Why don't you come in with me? It might take the stick out of your ass for a little while."

"I do not have a stick in my arse! Now would you just shut up? I have to get this done if you want any chance of sex tonight."

"Case and point."

"Besides, it's not as though I brought a bathing suit."

"Aw, babe, I can tell you're stressed when you start talking like that. And, anyway, if you'd bothered to look up earlier you'd know I'm naked right now."

"America! You can't do things like that!"

"Why not? We're in private and, really, how much do you think that swim trunks do?"

"Now I'm definitely not coming in!" He turned back to the desk and picked up his pen with an air of finality.

America came to the near side of the tub and placed his chin on the edge. Time to switch tactics, "Hey England?"

"For God's sake, what is it?" He spun around and glared at America.

"How much work did you really think you'd get done with me here?"

"None if you don't shut up!"

America smiled, "You know I don't do that, though. Not unless I get what I want."

"So if I come in for a while you'll shut up?"

"If you sit with me until I'm ready to get out."

England sighed but stood, "This is going to take all night won't it?" His hands went to his dress shirt and, defeated, he began to unbutton it, "Well, Germany's scolding is more bearable than your incessant whining."

"Exactly," America said, smiling and going back to his previous position.

England shed his clothes as he approached. By the time he got to the hot tub he was completely naked. He climbed in and sat down across from America, still glaring. America laughed and pulled him over.

"You're supposed to sit next to your boyfriend, stupid."

"You calling anyone stupid is completely ironic."

America laughed and put an arm around England's shoulder, "Come on, just relax."

"I'd relax better if I knew that report was done!"

"Damn, that stick is way up in there today. Should I try fishing it out?"

"It's enough that I let you drag me in here," He took America's arm and pushed it off of his shoulder, "We're not having sex."

"I never said we were." He smiled sweetly and reached over to turn on the jets. England jumped when they started to blow.

"What do you think you're doing?"

"Come on, baby, what's a hot tub without the bubbles?"

"It means that the people inside intend to stay, and I have to get back to work soon."

"You've been in here for like ten seconds!"

"So?"

"Hush, sweetie, this is supposed to be relaxing."

"But I-"

"Ssh."

"America-"

"Ssh." He straddled England's thighs.

"Meri-" He was turning red. America didn't know if it was from the heat or how close their faces were getting.

"Ssh," he said one last time before finally pressing their lips together. England not only accepted it, he reciprocated, pushing back and threading his fingers in America's hair. When they pulled apart England was even smiling.

"See?" America asked, "It's not so bad."

He sighed, "I really should go, but should is something you never so much as consider."

America smiled and leaned down to kiss him again, this time rubbing England's shoulders, loving the feel of hard, compact muscle beneath his hands. If only there wasn't so much tension up there…

"We still can't have sex in here, you know," England said, putting his arms around America's waist, "Water makes for a terrible lubricant and I don't know how it'll react with our usual stuff."

"Hey, you of all people should know that there's more than one way to do it."

England raised an eyebrow, "And what, may I ask, do you intend to do with me?"

"Just trust me and put your hands over the edge, okay?"

He rolled his eyes but leaned back and did as America asked.

"Perfect. Now hang on a sec."

America took a deep breath and dove down. He tried to open his eyes to see England's groin, but in addition to the sting there were bubbles in the way. Damn, that changed things. He reached out and took England's hips, guiding them up to the surface. England's entire body was floating on top of the water then, spread and pink and beautiful. He was still soft, but that was easy enough to fix. Since America's hands were holding England's hips, he kissed around the base of his cock. He shifted his grip so that he could keep him in place with one hand. He began to use his other one to tease England's foreskin, something he wasn't usually allowed to do.

"Oh, quit it, you," England said. But he was smiling again.

America decided that it was good enough for the moment. He gently tipped England's cock sideways and kissed up the side. It wasn't completely limp anymore and was starting to get thicker and thicker. America smiled and glanced up at England's face. His eyes were closed and he was starting to breathe more heavily.

"Christ, he's beautiful," America thought as he went to palming England instead of kissing him.

"Hey, America, are you enjoying yourself over there?"

"Hmm? Why?"

"Because," He suddenly flipped them and water splashed everywhere, "I don't want to be the only one who's getting excited."

"Oh, baby, just seeing you is enough for me," America said.

"You're not lying," England said, rubbing America's cock appreciatively, "Am I really that attractive?"

America looked him over. Even ignoring those huge eyebrows and all the white, knotted scars, there was a lot to pick at. He'd gained weight recently, but in spite of that his limbs were still bony with knobby knees and elbows you could poke an eye out on.

"Yes," America said, shivering slightly, "Oh, fuck, yes."

England smiled. Even the harshest Hollywood casting department couldn't think his smile wasn't beautiful, "Bloody flatterer."

"Hey, it's true. That's the power of love, baby. You could be missing half your face and you'd still be the sexiest man alive."

England splashed him, "You cheesy," Splash, "Stupid," Splash, "Moronic," Splash, "Drop dead gorgeous son of a bitch!"

America prepared himself for another splash, but instead England grabbed his shoulders and pulled him forward into a kiss. America laughed softly, definitely preferring this to a face full of water.

"So," England said when he let him go, "This was your idea. So, how do you propose we do this?"

"Get off for a sec."

England did so, allowing America to roll over. If he put his foot against the edge of the tub's floor he was just tall enough to throw his arms over the edge. He folded them and put set his head down.

"Okay, now put your cock between my thighs."

With a brief nod, England scrambled onto America's back. He was moving around an awful lot and his cock didn't seem to be going anywhere near where it was supposed to be.

"You okay back there?" America asked.

"I'm having a bit of trouble. This is a rather awkward position. Can't you just stand up like usual?"

"If I do that I'm pretty sure I'll fall. The bottom's flat and slippery."

"Ah, right. One moment then."

America looked over his shoulder and watched as England continued to scuttle around, looking for a position that would work. It was kind of cute, even though England was starting to get desperate for somewhere to shove his cock and America was starting to get desperate for him to have a place to shove his cock. Eventually, England ended up basically laying on top of America.

"Can you hold us both?"

"Hey, who do you think I am?"

"Someone whose legs like to give out prior to orgasm?"

"Just shut up and fuck me."

England wrapped his arms firmly around America's waist and gave him a peck on the back of the neck.

"I hope you're ready then," he whispered, and without any more warning he plunged between America's thighs.

America arched his back and clamped his legs tighter. He always forgot why he liked this position so much, why England could make him come so hard just by fucking his legs like that. It was so easy for him to forget how sensitive his thighs could be when he was in the right position and with the right person. England had a tendency to go as high as possible too, teasing at his most sensitive areas and making him want more but hate the idea of him moving. And then England went and wrapped a hand around his cock, just stroking him lightly enough to keep him moving towards the edge but stop him from getting there first. He shuddered. In spite of the now stifling heat from the air and the water, England had managed to give him chills.

"Are you okay… America?"

"Oh, oh- I'm awesome. Just- just don't stop. Don't ever stop."

"I- Oh God, Meri! –I don't think I could."

"Then don't. Just don't!"

But in spite of his words, America was starting to have issues keeping his legs together. His legs were starting to twitch, muscles just waiting to give out and make him fall. He couldn't help himself. He was strong, yeah, but England, oh God, England. America could feel every inch of his body, every one of the beautiful curves and angles that made up the other man. And then there were the beautiful things he was huffing in his ear, the throaty moans and the half-understandable declarations of love all with those hot, wet puffs of air on the shell of his ear. Who could resist that?

But no! No, goddammit! He was the United States of motherfucking America and he was not going to let something as stupid as his muscles wanting to quite stop his sexytime!

"Please England," He whimpered, "Please hurry."

"I'll try, love." He grunted, "But I'll have to… I'll have to take my hand away."

"That's fine. Just please, please finish while I can keep this up."

"Right," England said. He let go and stopped for a minute so that he could get a solid grip on America's hips, and then he started spamming. America swore that he was going like twice as fast as he had before.

"Fuck!" America shouted, arching again, even though it put more stress on his legs.

He bit down on his hand. Normally he'd go for something of England's, but it wasn't exactly an option at the time. Hell, he couldn't remember the last time he'd felt that much friction. His thighs were going to be raw the next morning. Fuck, that hadn't happened since the days he wore dresses and his legs rubbed together when he ran. He let go of his hand and laughed.

"Almost there, my love," England panted in his ear, "Almost there."

"I wanna- wanna come with you."

"Can you handle it?"

"If not, I'll blow you for a week and bottom for a… for a month."

England laughed, "You're going to end up doing that anyway." But in spite of that, he took America's cock again and started pumping a counterpoint rhythm to his thrusts, which had grown slower again since he had one less hand. It was a little bit scary. After all, America was practically forcing his orgasm back, trying to delay it until England came.

He was getting really close, though. America could tell because he'd started to kiss every inch of skin available. England always got more affectionate when he was almost finished. It was probably his way of saying, "I know I can be mean and rude, but I love you. I really do." At least, that was what America liked to pretend it meant.

Oh shit! His knees just locked. Goddamit, he was gonna fall. He was gonna fall!

But then thankfully, mercifully, England came, making America's thighs somehow feel even hotter than they had before.

"Let go, Meri," England whispered, guiding him down onto his knees. The water was up to his neck, making him feel almost uncomfortably warm. The jets had turned off long ago, so the water was almost completely still around him. "Just let go."

Well, who was he to ignore that kind of request? England kept pumping him, letting him sort of ride out his orgasm even though he didn't think he had the strength to move his hips. He leaned back against England's chest, trying to catch his breath.

"We should move up to one of the benches," England said, "It's enough that we tainted the water, we should at least sit in the right spot. If you collapse anymore you'll drown."

"Then don't let me collapse anymore. I like it here."

"We should go shower and then get into bed. We've got more meetings tomorrow."

"Meh, later. Like I said, I like it here."

"We should."

America turned around and pressed a finger to England's lips, "Should is something I never so much as consider."

"You always steal my lines," England said, pushing his hand away, "Be original, will you?"

"Nah, originality is for people who don't have the best guy to copy from."

Well, that made him shut up in the best way possible.