Once again, I'm super sorry for the super late update. Please don't forget to review because that is what keeps me going basically. I promise, I will update soon
Thank you to my beta reader RosalieThropp. You're awesome!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything

She dropped her pants on the floor and let out a relieved breath, the stretchable fabric around her growing baby bump had been warm, itchy and almost impossible to wear.
It was their third week in their new house and; to Nikita's dismay; the first week that it had become impossible for her to wear her old clothes. She pulled off her new black shirt too, sighing rather loudly. She refused to go shopping with Michael, she felt very clumsy and uncomfortable in her own skin. She didn't even want to look at the size she was wearing now.
Though, Nikita later realized that it had been a mistake not to come with him. Michael came home with the right size but the style of the clothes was questionable. She would have preferred those kinds of clothes before her pregnancy, but she didn't approve of them at all now.

She wandered to the bathroom and squeezed some toothpaste out on the toothbrush and started to brush her teeth while looking at her profile in the mirror. Nikita placed her hands on her now giant stomach. Her face was a swollen and her thighs had grown huge. For the first time in years she felt really uncomfortable and unattractive.
But besides her new size, there was something else bothering her. She continued to gently stroke her stomach and her thoughts were suddenly on baby; the little baby that she hoped would have a normal future, but knew that would eventually be dragged into the messiness created by its parents past.

Nikita sighed again as she felt two strong hands embracing her and settling on her baby bump, on top of her own.

"You're so beautiful" he murmured, nuzzling her neck

She just couldn't help but giggle in response. No matter how bad she felt, Michael always knew what to say.

"Shut up" she responded through a mouthful of toothpaste. Michael smiled as she leaned her head against his chest and resumed her task to brush her teeth.

He gently rubbed small circles on her stomach and kissed her neck softly. She sighed.

"I mean it. You look divine" he repeated.

"Really?" she asked. Nikita washed her mouth and then turned around to face him "I'm huge" she stated, slightly annoyed.

"You're not huge" he chuckled. "You think that this is huge? Wait two more months. Then you'll be huge" he winked.

"Not helping" she murmured and tried to hide a grin.

Michael turned her around again so she was facing the mirror. Again, gently put his arms around her and looked at her from the mirror.

"You know those women in the commercials for maternity clothes?" he questioned.

Nikita arched an eyebrow.

"The tiny ones that spin around in high heels and red dresses with a fake stomach" he clarified to make his point.

"Yeah" she conceded "I wish I looked like them"

He chuckled again.

"Can you shut up?" he said and looked her right in the eyes. "They just look like that because most of the times, they're not real pregnant women. But you…" He looked at her again and smiled "You are a real woman. You really look stunning, Nikita" he whispered softly.

Nikita gave him a shy smile and bit her fingernails.

"Is something else that bothering you" Michael pressed delicately. He could read her easily by now.

The look on her eyes gave away her agony.

"Spit it out" he pressed her a little further.

"It's just that…" she hesitated for a few seconds"What will we do when and if we have to go back? If we have to go out on missions or anything remotely as dangerous as the things we did as agents, how are we going to fit a baby into that lifestyle? Have Birkhoff babysit her while we are out risking our lives? Or what if we got attacked? Or…"

Michael noticed she was spiraling in her negative thoughts, so he decided to stop her rambling.

"Hey, hey…" He pulled her into a tight hug "We'll make it work, I promise" he tried to ease her mind. He knew her fears weren't irrational; she had all the right to be worried; but thinking about such nerve-racking matters at seven months pregnant would just be harmful for her and the baby.

"We have to leave her here, don't we?" Nikita asked into his chest.

"Yeah, I think that that is for the best" He nodded slowly and kissed the top of her head.

Nikita looked up at him with a small pout. He gently kissed her lips "But you know what, why don't we enjoy this moment and think about this tomorrow?" he asked with a smile.

-x-

"What are we supposed to tell her?" Nikita mused while feeding their little girl.

"Suppose to tell her what?" Michael questioned looking down at the infant.

"Our life story" she clarified "How we met and our journey. Kids ask that stuff, right?" she looked in the eyes of her innocent baby girl.

Michael played with Isobel's little fingers "We can tell her that you had a wonderful trainer that seduced you with his charm and personality." He said to make her laugh, but she didn't.

"Great, now we sound like creepy, perverted parents, and she might think it's okay for her to date her teachers" she sighed "Also, you didn't seduce me, I seduced you" she said with a cheeky grin.

"So you think that it's a better idea that we tell that we are elite killers, gun experts, highly skilled in hand to hand combat, not to mention we killed bad guys on a regularly basis. Besides, of course, the several times we've been close to killing each other" he questioned.

Nikita rolled her eyes and he knew he'd made his point.

"We did try to kill each other" she chuckled, and shifted Isobel to a more comfortable position, causing the baby to let go of her breast and whine in discontentment "I'm sorry sweetie, I thought you were finished" Nikita said as Isobel found Nikita's breast again and quietly calmed down.

Nikita couldn't help but to smile warmly at the daughter "You are adorable sweet thing" she kissed one of the baby's tiny hands.

"She eats like there's no tomorrow" he stated and looked down at the baby girl "Isn't it, little one?" Michael said, smiling to both his girls.

"Or we just tell her the truth" he said and watched as Isobel's eyes grew heavier and heavier. "When she's old enough to understand, of course. But we may have to skip the trying-to-kill-each-other part "

"Well, maybe we can't wait that long. What if there isn't enough time?" Nikita questioned, trying to swallow the lump on her throat.

She kissed her baby's forehead and started to lightly rock her back and forth, watching as sleep took over the little girl.

"They could be calling any day, you know" Nikita said quietly "Sarah and Charlie, no one here really know us. What if we are forced to leave and don't make it back?" Tears slowly began to form in the corner of her eye "It will look like we abandoned her. And she will never know why."

"Nikita…" Michael gently stroked her cheek "We are never abandoning our daughter. We are just staying away to ensure her safety. We are giving her her best chance. Someday, she'll understand" he guaranteed, wiping her tears away.

Hours later, just after Nikita had taken a comfortable place in their bed with little Isobel positioned in her arms he showed up with some papers and a pen.

"Let's write it down" he said simply

"What" she questioned, confused.

"Write down our life story, explain it in a simple way. We'll only include the details that are relevant" he winked at her.

"This is exactly why I love you" she said with excitement and handed their child over to him. Isobel, now on Michael's chest, started to drool a bit on his shirt.

"You're not the only girl who's drooling all over me" he said to Nikita as she started to write.

She turned her head and met a pair of shining bright eyes.

"Yeah honey, I know she's daddy's little girl "she smiled at them.

She held a picture tightly in her left hand, a picture of a little girl, smiling in the pouring rain in a huge garden. She took a deep breath and gathered all her courage to ring on the doorbell.

The woman that opened the door was saying something, speak but quieted down quickly when she saw who it was on the door. The woman that opened the door; who at a time she knew so well; looked so different.

Her hair had grown longer and had a lighter tone, the shadows beneath the eyes were gone and replaced by a wide smile at her lips that slowly disappeared.

A man with a child joined the woman. He also looked rather different than the last time she'd seen him, but what caught Alex's attention was the sleeping child in his arms.

"Michael why don't you put her down to bed" she said and looked back at her husband and daughter.

"No" Alex pleaded, a little insecure "Can I just look at her? Just for one minute."

"Come on in instead" Nikita said to Alex with a warm smile. "You can look at her as long as you want to."

A little hesitant, Alex didn't move immediately. She felt a little awkward and out of place.

"It's okay" Nikita held out her hand to the younger girl "It's still me, you know" she said in a humorously tone.

A small smile spread on Alex's face and they made their way into the living room

"Take a seat" she said and pointed at the big couch. "Do you want some tea?"

"That would be nice, thank you" Alex said quietly.

Michael came up behind them, still holding the sleeping Isobel in his arms.

"Hey, can you hold her for a sec? I need to get a thing upstairs" Michael asked Alex

"Sure" Alex agreed a little uneasy, but beamed as Michael carefully placed Isobel in her arms, trying not to wake her.

"Thanks" he smiled and turned around to leave the room.

He winked at Nikita, who was just coming his way with two cups of tea. Nikita chuckled.

"Nice place you got here" Alex with a smile as Nikita sat in the couch opposite to her.

"Yeah sorry about the mess" Nikita apologized as she places Alex's cup of tea in the coffee table in between them "Iz combined with toys can only result in a mess"

Alex just chuckled, a tense silence filled the room.

"She's beautiful" Alex said and looked down at the child in her arms, cautiously stroking her hair, worried about waking the sleeping girl.

"Yeah well as Michael usually says, she's sweetest when she's asleep..." Nikita chuckled "You should see her when she's awake, she drives us crazy."

"Oh, It can't be that bad" the young Russian said, her eyes still on the little girl.

"Trust me, it is" Nikita chuckled. "It's all mind games for her and it's hard to beat her. She's so unpredictable."

"Just like her parents" Alex laughed, but her face immediately became for serious "I really want to get to know her" She said quietly, a new tone of sadness on her voice.

"You, will. Someday." Nikita said with a sad smile. "Will you tell me that happened or should we just sit her the whole night and do the small talk thing" Nikita said as gently as she could manage to her old companion.

Alex's face fell.

"We had them" Alex murmured "We had them"

"Okay…" Nikita started delicately, noticing the change in Alex's demeanor "Who are we and who are them?"

"Me, Ryan, Owen and Birkhoff" she swallowed "We had Percy"

Alex took a calming breath and Nikita waited for her to continue.

"And then everything went wrong… we had Percy and Amanda all cornered in and ..." she gathered her breath trying to fight the tears.

Nikita grabbed her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. Alex swallowed her tears and continued

"When we were about to strike they surprised us with a backup team... and they captured Birkhoff" she said and swallowed hard "And we can't find him. We don't know how to get him out. We're not even sure that he is alive" thick tears rolled down her cheeks "You guys have to help us" she said desperately.

"Of course we will" Nikita agreed, her heart aching to see Alex's anguish.

"I'm so sorry" she sobbed; now having a really hard time fighting her tears. One after another, they came streaming down her face.

"I booked these tickets two weeks ago, hoping…hoping you guys can come home. Our safe house is safe. But – but, if you don't wanna go it's...it's okay. We'll find anoth…"

"We'll help you" Nikita interrupted Alex, and stroked her cheek comfortingly. "We both knew that this day would come. We will make it out of this" she said with a sad smile.

Alex her mentor embrace her for a long time before Michael entered the room.

The young girl tried to blink her tears away but Michael just gave her an understanding smile.

"I will get the little fireball tucked into bed" Michael said to Nikita. He caught Nikita's gaze and they communicated silently as usual before he scoped the little girl up and turned around again.

"Why don't you get some sleep and we'll talk more tomorrow, okay?" Nikita gently said to Alex "Come on, let me show your room."

-x-

"What happened?" Michael asked Nikita when she joined him in bed.

She snuggled closer to him and buried her face in the crook of his neck.

"They got Birkhoff" she said with a teary voice.

"Yeah, I figured it would be something like that" he sighed and looked down at her. They both had tears in their eyes, because they both knew what it meant "It's time to leave her"

"I know" she said as silent tears streamed down her face. She kissed him slowly, desperately.

When she broke the kiss Michael held her close

"This is for the best, we both knew that this day would come" he tried to reason

"It's just too soon" she sighed.

He woke up to find Nikita cutting and gluing with papers. "Nikita, come to bed" he whispered, a little drowsy.

"Can't" she answered shortly.

Michael got out of bed and took the place behind her chair to look what she was doing. He bent down and pulled her hair over to the left side of her neck and kissed it gently. He soon understood what she was doing.

"You're camouflaging our letters" he stated.

"Yep" she said and smiled. "Voilá , finished" she said and showed up the disguised letters "I included a photo as well" she said, reaching up and running her fingers through his hair.

"Back to bed now?" he questioned

Nikita looked up over her shoulder and agreed

"Back to bed."

But before she could reach the comfort of their bed, she heard a little whine across the hall. As an automatic reaction, she made her way to their daughter's room.

When Nikita carefully pushed up the door, Iz stood up with teary eyes in the crib.

"Come here" Nikita said and the baby stretched her arms out "You want to sleep in mommy and daddy's bed tonight?" Nikita questioned kissing her forehead.

The little girl nodded in response.

When the baby saw her dad in the bed she immediately reached after him and started to cry.

"It's okay honey" Nikita said and positioned Isobel in the middle of their bed. Their daughter quickly curled up against Michael's chest. Nikita snuggled closer to them as offered her daughter a small smile. The little girl tangled her tiny hands on her mother's long raven hair, hair while sucking on her thumb.

"I love you little fireball" Michael whispered before closing his eyes.

-x-

When they dropped her off at Sarah's, Michael and Nikita kept it real, telling her as much of the truth that were safe to mention; that a kid that they had helped years ago had relapsed and now some really dangerous gangs were after them. That's why they had to flee, the risk of being found was big and therefor little Isobel would be safer with them.

The always understanding Sarah just nodded and said "Of course."

"Also" Nikita added "If we don't make it back and she stars to ask some questions, give her this" she said and handed over two letters.

Sarah just smiled back kindly with tears in her eyes and said "I know that you'll make it back."

Nikita hugged her friend, trying to hold her tears back.

"Take care of her" Michael pleaded softly"and don't worry about the financial part, we'll send money."

Nikita smiled at her daughter who was already in the living room, playing with Sebastian.

"Izzie, honey. Come here" her mother called.

Izzie, with a wide smile on her lips wandered to the front door unsteadily. Both Michael and Nikita got down on their knees to her level.

"Hey, Iz." Michael said.

"Mom and dad will be gone for a while." Nikita choked, she was having a hard time keeping eye contact with their daughter. She barely could stand to look at her innocent bright eyes.

"We will be back to pick you up" Michael continued "but it might take a while."

They baby girl gave her parents a confused look, having a hard time to understanding what her parents meant. She just knew they'd be apart and she didn't like the idea.

She gripped at Nikita's neck and clenched her little arms around her mother like if her life depended on it.

Nikita stroked her hair and whispered reassuring words into her ear. She gently asked her daughter to let go of her but the little one refused. After a few more minutes with her daughter in her arms, Nikita carefully gave Izzie away to Sarah with a great deal of effort.

Isobel cried and tried to get away from Sarah's grip, reaching for her parents. Michael and Nikita turned around, as soon as they had closed the door they heard the heart breaking sound of their daughter's cries.

They turned around and saw Isobel who had managed to get away from Sarah's hold and was standing in the glass window. Her face was filed with tears and she had a hurt look.

The last thing Nikita saw in her daughter's eyes was doubt.

In the middle of the night on the plane ride she just couldn't hold herself together any longer. Michael had some sort of disturbed sleep going on so the carefully snuck her way out to the toilet. As she looked to her image in the small mirror, she let the tears she'd been holding back stream down her cheeks. She wondered why did she have to break down now. She felt so weak, so vulnerable.

"Nikita" a sleepy voice said from the other side of the door "I know you're in there, let me in."

She opened the door.

"What have we done? We left our daughter! We left our only child!" she screamed. More tears came streaming down her face as Michael embraced her gently, caressed her back and kissed her hair.

He knew what she meant; he could feel it too. The pain, the sorrow, the guilt. This was without any doubt the hardest decision they had ever have to make.

"We will make it back" he guaranteed, tears filling his own eyes.

When both finally calmed down, Michael suggested carefully that they should make their way out of the bathroom before Alex started to worry.

She just nodded.

But before they could open the door somebody unlocked it from the outside. A woman started to speak in a threatening but quiet voice.

"You two. It's not allowed to join the high mile club on this plane. Out, out, OUT" She demanded but quieted down pretty quickly when she saw the couple's teary faces.

"Oh" she said.

Michael just gave her a very judgmental gaze while Nikita murmured as she passed by the angry lady "Please, we joined that club years ago" and just continued to their seats.

When they both were seated again they looked at each other and let out a chuckle.

"That wasn't actually a stab in the dark" Michael whispered in Nikita's ear as she shifted herself to a more comfortable position.

"We do look like a couple that would do stuff like that, don't we?"

"We do stuff like that" Nikita said and let out a chuckle.

"We did" Michael corrected her.

"I seem to recall a military plane two years ago " Nikita said and raised an eyebrow "Well, we still got it apparently."

Michael chuckled again and Nikita turned serious.

"We need this Michael" she said. "It's important that we don't lose ourselves in all this" she touched his face "If we're going to get through this we need to stick together"

"Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!" she screamed and slammed the door behind her.

"Hey, Izzie. I didn't really mean it" Sebastian's desperate voice said outside the door.

"Please come out."

For a ten year old, Izzie was quite flexible and strong. She had many times climbed out from her window and now she was about to do it again. Even though Sarah and Charlie had forbidden her from doing so lots of times before.

"I'm so sorry Izzie" Sebastian said again, even more desperately. Tears streamed down her cheeks now as she swung her legs over the window frame and reached for a branch with two letters, one of them half destroyed.

Even though she knew that it was of pure curiosity that Sebastian took and read the letters, she was still mad and unsure of how much he managed to read before she took them back.

How much did he know? She had a lump in her throat; it felt like she had betrayed her parents. She jumped and hit the ground with a silent thud.

She ran over the street and directly into the house that she knew so well. She looked over her shoulder to make sure that nobody was watching her and took the key under the stone to unlock the door.

She took a deep breath and felt the familiar scent, sighing when she saw the family portrait hung up on the wall, she and her mom were laughing and her dad had small grin in his lips.

She stepped into her old room where she only had lived a couple of years, leaning against the doorframe as she studied

It had a yellow little crib placed in the corner of the room.

Going further into the place, she took the well-known DVD at the table beside her crib, inserted it into the player and pressed play. The three clips that she had seen at least four hundred times started to play.

Her lips turned up in a smile when her mother's face showed up on the screen.

"Honey, what are you doing?" a man's voice asked from behind the camera

"I'm reading" she responded and took her glasses off "Can you turn off that video camera and help me decide on a name?" she said and reached for the camera while lovingly stroking her pregnant stomach.

"Your wish will be fulfilled ma'am" He said and Isobel could barely hear a laughter before her dad pressed the pause button.

The video continued automatically on to the next one. Her mother spinning around in a summer dress she looked so happy, so peaceful.

The last one was Isobel's favorite, her mother that had sneaked up behind her father with a camera in the middle of the night and filmed her and her dad. He swayed her back and forth and hummed a song.

"Hey little fireball" he said with a soft voice "Are you daddy's little fireball?" he asked. Nikita chuckled and the camera started to shake lightly.

"Yes, I am your fireball" ten year old Isobel responded with tears in her eyes.

Then she heard a man's voice behind her.

"Hey kiddo."

Okay so I have some stuff to say
1) I just love love LOVE my readers and I hope that you enjoyed this chapter. Thank you for reading!
2) I really hope that you guys enjoyed the season premiere as much as I did… A-M-A-Z-I-N-G. Now I'm looking forward to that super haawt shower scene ;)
3) Read Miami Blackheart's story, Marbles. I LOOOVE IT AND I WANT HER TO UPDATE!

And that's it for today, I really want your opinions and feedback guys, so don't forget to review.