So, hey...I came up with this new idea...
...please don't hate me!
'Never wanted to feel
Never wanted you to steal my heart'
Seriously! Was all she could think.
Seriously! Was practically how she felt at the time.
It was like her God damn iphone music was rubbing the heartbreak in her face.
First it was Told You So, by Jesse McCartney.
Then came; Forever And Always, by Taylor Swift.
More pain clenched her heart as Selena Gomez's The Way I Loved You, blared through her ears.
Followed by; It Will Rain, by Bruno Mars (she knew she shouldn't have bought that song on itunes).
'Never wanted to know
Never wanted to show I'm weak'
This totally sucked. She couldn't change the stupid song because she didn't feel like moving.
Hell, she didn't even feel like breathing.
Why was it that Rachel practically had everything?
That damn girl got everything she ever wanted and she just had to rub the factor of Finn in Quinn's face. Prancing around the hallway with him hand in hand and everything. Kissing when they got the chance.
The blonde may have sorta aknowledged Berry as a friend but she couldn't say it didn't hurt that wherever Berry went, Finn was sure to go...
...thinking about it that kind of ruined Mary Had A Little Lamb for Quinn.
Believe it when it's said that Quinn wished she could move on from the boy.
She wished it more than anything.
He clearly had moved on.
And she had tried, she put her mind on Beth, trying to focus on the little girl. She wanted to be loved by someone and even if it wasn't Finn, she could make an attempt at being happy. She wanted someone, anyone to want her.
So, she pushed aside the thought of Finn. She set her eyes on her daughter, she set her eyes on Beth. She swore she'd get her back, the baby had to love her right?
She was her mother after all.
But the Beth thing didn't even work. She realized it as the first thoughts of Finn flew back into her mind. She knew then and there that the thoughts weren't going away.
That just made her push harder; trying to get on The Troubletones, her almost telling the Shelby/Puck story to Figgins to get Shelby fired...
...It still never worked.
Finn was a tattoo.
Permanently inked upon her heart.
No matter how much she pushed toward the Beth thing, Finn never left her mind. She'd see him everyday still walking hand in hand with Rachel Berry.
The girl who was supposedly her friend now.
'I'm falling all over myself
Trying to be someone else
I wish you would dare to walk me home
So I wouldn't have to feel alone'
Mockingbird, by Eminem...
Don't Forget, by Demi Lovato...
Songbird, by Fleetwood Mac...
From The Bottom Of My Broken Heart, by Britney Spears...
In The End, by Nick Jonas...
Silence, by Aly & AJ...
'Always wanted to be
Always wanted you to see my heart
Always wanted your love
Always wanted but never was'
And now this, Seriously...
...There were tears...
She was freaking crying!
Finn had named a star after himself, just for her, just for Rachel. And now there was a freaking star in the sky with the same name of the love of her life and it got to sit there up in the sky and look down at Rachel and the real Finn Hudson be a loving couple...
...Not to mention that it got to look down at her all broken hearted and stupid, she swore it was mocking her too.
What the hell is wrong with me?
Why couldn't she get over him?
She just didn't understand.
The song was blaring in her ears, she didn't hear her mom yell up the stairs that she'd be going to the store before running off to some book club meeting.
She was too busy listening to heartbreaking music, she was laying on the bed within her bedroom and she was listeing to music.
She had wanted to listen to something to get her mind off of Finn, but all that played was heartbreaking songs...it wasn't right, and she didn't get it...
Santana had Brittany...
Mercedes had that Shane dude (not to mention Sam)...
Tina had Mike...
Brittany had Santana...
And Rachel had Finn...
Kurt had Blaine...
Blaine had Kurt...
And Rachel had Finn...
Yo, what'cha doing? Britt's and I are going to a rave party, is you in or is you out?
-San
It's not like she actually wanted to read the text, it's just that when her phone went off (she had an iphone so she was listening to her ipod music on it) she had accidentally clicked on the message.
I'm out
-Q
There was no way she could go to a rave party feeling how she was feeling at the moment...
Someone Like You, by Adele...
Oxygen, by Colbie Caillat...
'I'm falling all over myself
Trying to be someone else
I wish you would dare to walk me home
So I wouldn't have to feel alone
I'm falling all over myself
Dying to be someone else
I wish you would dare to walk me home
I don't wanna fight the world alone'
Bitch! What's up with you?
-San
Santana was never good at showing concern or any emotion remotely related to it, but when it came to friends she really did care...and calling Quinn a bitch and asking what was up was really code for: I wish you'd come, please tell me what's wrong...
Nothing, I just don't feel like hanging out today.
-Q
She wiped the tears away as she sent the message, she really hoped Santana would just drop it and not text her back...
Please come, I promise Britt's and I will keep the making out to a minimum level ;P
-San
...But it's Santana, and she never lets anything go...
I really just don't feel like doing anything.
-Q
'Never told you before
Never loved you more'
Okay, I'm so not buying it Quinn, seriously, what's wrong?
-San
And Quinn didn't answer...
...She didn't want to deal with the Latina anymore...
...and even if Santana texted about thirty more times before she actually gave up, it wouldn't matter, because Quinn wouldn't even bother to read the messages...
'I'm falling all over myself
Trying to be someone else
I wish you would dare to walk me home
So I wouldn't have to feel alone'
She used to love this song, before Finn and her had broken up the second time, she had loved this song, it was heartbreaking and it was terrible but it was heartfelt and amazing at the same time.
And listening to it now, listening to it with a broken heart really just made everything stand out to her even more...
...Finn had broken up with her and he had chosen Rachel, every day she saw them together it was another clench of her heart, another dent in her disguise of being okay...
'I'm falling all over myself
Dying to be someone else
I wish you would dare to walk me home
I don't wanna fight the world alone
I don't wanna fight the world alone
I don't wanna fight the world alone'
Finn was the only one who could make her feel worth something, he was the only one who had ever understood her, and he had chosen someone else...
And she knew now as she cried her tears she was alone.
She was just Quinn.
'All alone'
Okay, so I'm not sure how it turned out, but the whole "Rachel and Finn" thing is getting on my nerves, it's making me a little sad, I know they're probably endgame on the show...
...and I just hate the fact that Quinn still has no one, so this song and this story kind of sums up how she may be feeling and all...
Please, do let me know if it was good or not; I know it may be heartbreaking (don't worry I'll write some more happiness soon), but I just had to get this out...
Thanks for reading...
Song:
Heart, by The Pretty Reckless (Beautiful Song)