The Doctor swung himself around the console to face Artemis.

"So, you were wondering about the box. Bigger on the inside, pretty cool, eh? It's basically another set of dimensions that the box sort of straddles, very convenient, way beyond your time period of course."

He was prepared for the standard reaction of bewilderment, and was mildly disappointed when it didn't happen. Instead, Artemis said impatiently, "No need to dumb it down, Doctor. I am as well-equipped to discuss advanced physics as anyone on Earth, and have in fact made several significant contributions to string theory under the pseudonym F. R. Myon."

"Well, all right then. The problem is that the TARDIS can't really be understood through conventional physics. She's more than a machine, she's a sentient organism." The Doctor patted the console fondly.

"And not only that, she's a sentient organism that exists outside of time as you or even as I can perceive it. Many of the most fundamental principles of time travel theory haven't even technically been discovered yet. My species developed time capsules before they really understood the theory, and now it's hard to say where anything comes from: Time Lord innovation, the TARDISes, or the vortex itself."

Artemis was feeling unusually out of his depth, but took this information in stride. "What is the vortex, exactly? And from where does your ship derive its power? The energy required must be phenomenal."

The Doctor grinned. "Clever, that. I basically-"

"Okay, geniuses, can we cut to the chase here?" Amy rescued the narrative with a predictable remark. "This story hasn't been updated in ages and people are probably getting sick of the technobabble and lack of plot advancement. No one really cares about the science anyways, you know."

"Good heavens, Amy, this isn't science!" the Doctor said, appalled. "And it's not even technobabble, really."

Artemis was equally horrified. "This is science fiction! The purpose is for everything to sound like science to create a more plausible scenario, without becoming overwhelming."

"Okay, okay, whatever," said Amy, defeated. "but shouldn't we be moving on to some action by now? Or has someone completely lost track of what this story is supposed to be about?"

All three turn and give me accusing looks.

Okay, okay. Forgive me. I'm in a weird mental state.

I've been involved in some real life adventures lately, resulting in the neglect of this fictional one. On the plus side, I've accomplished a lot in the non-fanfiction world, which I consider just a bit more important. On the not-so-great side, this story has stagnated.

Fear not, intrepid readers, for I do have a plan and will get a serious update online in the very near future. I'm just a bit fried from exams and other commitments and need to reboot. I tried to write a chapter and it deteriorated rapidly into fragmented absurdity (see above).

So stay tuned!