Companions of the Night © Vivian Vande Velde

To Be Forever There

He could tell that she was a wreck; she always wore a sad smile on her face. Everything was pretend. He didn't want to leave. He chose to stay… he had promised. Kerry was there for him then, and he felt that he still had not returned the favor.

It's been fifteen years since that day, she returned somewhat broken and distraught. He just couldn't help but watch her, trying to care for her every step of the way.

When Kerry found a man to love her unconditionally, he was happy for her, and gladly supported her. For a while, she was happy and content, married with an adopted young child.

But tragedy would strike her happy married life, losing her husband to a car accident, and later her son to Reye's syndrome. How unlucky her life was, he thought. It seemed that everyone she cared for was leaving her behind. So then, how can he?

Kerry hadn't known that for the past month he had been working, earning money for his own basic necessities. In a way he was starting to feel the stress of providing for her. She had told him to quit before, telling him that he should just leave. She had told him that she can manage herself. But anyone can see that she cannot manage anything at the moment.

"Kerry…" he touched her shoulder. She had been crying a few hours before; it's been like this for the longest time. "Kerry?" She was already asleep, and if she wasn't, she didn't want to be bothered.

To be sure he kept his hand on her shoulder, "Kerry, I'm going out… I'll be back before you know it." She didn't reply so he assumed that it was okay for him to leave.

He was about to leave the room when Kerry shuffled in the bed and reached out to him, "I want to die…" she whispered. "Everything…everyone is gone…"

"But I'm here Kerry," he said, there was a lump in his throat, "I'm here still Kerry."

She didn't reply and just started sobbing into her pillow. "Kerry," his voice was pleading, "Please stop crying." He couldn't take it; he used to be strong… but the emotional stress was just too much.

Kerry's sobbing grew louder and louder, and before he could stop himself, "KERRY!" she stopped, sniffling instead. He left the room in a hurry, burying his face in his hands, feeling so guilty. He felt worse when he thought of leaving. Don't. He thought. Don't do it.

After an hour he returned to Kerry's room, she had fallen asleep again. She was talking in her sleep, murmuring the same name over and over again. Michel.

Michel…who was that man?

"I change my mind Michel…" Kerry whispered, "My answer is no…"

Ian didn't ask what had happened fifteen years ago, but he knew that she regretted ever saying yes.

Either way, he chose to be forever there.

A/N: If you get it… when you get it.