heyy! so here's my new story - my first Marauders! ahhhh! anyway, so if you've been on my profile, you'll see that I wasn't decided on who Lily should be with (or who I should write her with) so i eventually decided James would be better instead of Snape! and for all you people out there who like Harry Potter and iCarly, and you ship both Seddie and Jathan, check out my profile for a few stories about both these couples! thanks, and please review!
HPloveofmylife

James Potter stares at the Patronus for what feels like an eternity, blinking rapidly as though to clear his mind. Clear the blur before his eyes as he processes the words that were spoken in such a rush he had to ask the weasel to repeat it.

"Mate, I'm sorry." Sirius says next to him, reaching out a hand to comfort him, but James rips away, stumbling to his feet blindly.

"James, where are you going?" Remus asks, slamming his book shut and laying it next to him. James mumbles something incoherently and turns, breaking into a swift run.

He can hear them calling after them, even Peter, who never says much. But he doesn't stop. He doesn't turn and go back, he just keeps running. He's not even sure where he's going, he's just hoping that when he opens his eyes, this nightmare will suddenly disappear. But he knows better.

The Patronus has to be wrong. It just has to be. His parents can't be dead! Facing Death Eaters and coming out alive was what they did. But maybe, just maybe, the Death Eaters got the best of them, got the best of James Potter's parents, and they were...dead.

It's this final thought that breaks James, breaks the unbreakable. He's never cried in public, ever, but there's no one around. And he's running fast, as fast as his legs will carry him. He has no idea where he's going, he's just going. The world drops from around him as the cold, hard truth finally hits him – his parents are dead. He's alone in the world.

He trips over and lands face-first, skidding along the wet, muddy ground. He feels the liquid seeping through his shirt to touch his stomach, but he doesn't move, just stays still, as though hoping to be immobile will make this nightmare go away. James eventually crawls to his feet and runs a hand through his mud-caked hair, fixes his lopsided glasses. He starts to walk ahead, twirling his wand in long, spindly fingers.

He comes to the lake and sits down on the damp, dewy grass with a heavy sigh. He slowly pulls off his shoes and socks and dips his feet in the cool water, dragging them around. Mid-Winter in London isn't exactly great, but he's here, at Hogwarts. Just like every year. Christmas is normally a time he spends around his parents, but this year he asked them if he could stay at Hogwarts over the break, because she was going to be there. They said yes.

Now, he wishes he could take it back. Stay home over the Christmas break so that he could at least see his parents once more before they died. The revelation that they're dead hits him square in the chest, and James Potter begins to sob uncontrollably, holding his head in his hands and letting the tears slip into his mouth bitterly.

"James?" Oh, Merlin, it's her. He looks up from his hands, drying his eyes hastily at her approaching form. And, yet again, it feels as though his breath is ripped from his body.

She's beautiful.

She has beautiful green eyes that are always playful when around that stupid Slytherin, Severus, but are always ice-cold the moment she lays eyes on him. Her lips are soft, and look warm. But the part he loves most about her is the red hair that flies about her face. Today, it's in an elegant braid down her back. He likes it better when it's out, easier to imagine running his fingers through it, kissing her eyelids, kissing her lips...

She sits next to him gracefully, hugging her knees close to her chest. "Sirius told me what happened." She whispers, bringing out her wand and drawing patterns in the mud with the tip. James stares at the lake, not daring to say anything, until Lily clears her throat dramatically, and he looks down. 'I'm sorry,' is scrawled into the mud, and he stares at the words, confused. "I really am sorry about your parents."

James trains his eyes on hers, and she stares back defiantly, as though daring him to look away. And he's suddenly hit by a thought: 'I really want to kiss Lily Evans.' He bites his lip and looks away before he can do something he'll really regret. "They died the way they would have wanted to." He mumbles into the silence, and Lily smiles softly. She reaches out after a moment and laces her fingers through his, squeezing slightly.

He stares down at their hands, mouth hanging open as though she shocked him. Lily immediately wishes she hadn't and tries to pull away, but James just tightens his grip and looks at him with dark brown eyes. "You're not alone." She suddenly whispers, and he cocks his head at her.

"I thought you hated me."

"Hate you? How can I hate you? Sure, you can be a prat sometimes, but when you want, you're sweet."

They sit in silence for a bit longer, James letting her words sink in, and Lily trying to believe she actually said that aloud.

"Thank you, Lily. You don't know how much this means to me." He suddenly says, spinning around to look at her. She just turns her head to look back, her green eyes alight.

"No problem, Potter. But don't go getting any ideas and saying to your friends that Lily Evans is a softie, or I will hunt you down and rip out each hair of your head." She jokes, and James laughs.

He rises to his feet, stretching, feeling his joints pop and crackle. "C'mon, Evans. Let's go back into the common room before you freeze." He motions to her fingers, which look as though they're about to drop off. He extends a hand to help her up, she accepts, and he drags her to her feet, keeping his fingers entwined with hers.

"Let's go." Lily says quietly, turning, and walking off. James feels his heart leap in his chest as he follows.

She hasn't released his hand yet.

He runs to catch up with her, and tightens his hold on her. They walk that way right up to the Tower, stopping just outside the common room, where the Fat Lady sits, picking at her nails uninterestedly.

"Thank you for coming to talk to me." He says awkwardly.

Lily raises an eyebrow, and gently untangles her fingers from his. He looks as though he's been burned, but he pushes it back. He mutters the password, the Fat Lady swings forward and just as he turns to clamber inside the portrait hole, Lily calls out, "James!" He stops and turns to her.

She runs up to him and kisses his cheek, just briefly, but it leaves his ears ringing and blood rushing to his cheeks. "I really am sorry about your parents." She murmurs softly before she climbs inside the portrait hole without a look back.

He stares at where she was, his jaw hanging open. Lily Evans just kissed him. Okay, so it was on the cheek, but she still kissed him! And she still came to find him when she found out about his parents! That has to mean something, right? Yeah, he thinks with a decisive nod of his head. A 3rd year Hufflepuff scurries past and looks up at him as though he's lost his mind. He doesn't care. Lily-freaking-Evans just kissed him, and he feels like the happiest guy alive.

Maybe there is a chance in hell for them. Well, at least, he hopes there is.

The world drops from around him as the cold, hard truth finally hits him – his parents are dead - catchline