A/N: Hello! Welcome to my first Ouran High School Host Club fic. This is also the first official original character I've created! *Claps hands excitedly*
Don't worry, she's not a Mary Sue! I made sure of that and I hope you find her likable.
This fic will be mostly humour and will mostly centre around the Hitachiin twins!
In terms of the story-line, it occurs when *Spoiler alert for those who haven't read the manga* Hikaru is kind of in love Haruhi but before Haruhi realizes she's in love with Tamaki. Later on I'll include the other host club members and such and I decided that this fic was going to be KaoruMatsu because I don't want to change the story too much.

I hope you enjoy ^-^

Warning: If you support the pairing KaoruxHikaru then you may be offended because this story contains anti-incest views.

Disclaimer: Ouran High School Host Club belongs to Bisco Hatori and always will.

"Make sure you don't break anything and be nice to the twins, I don't want any complaints from Yuzuha, got it?" Dad ordered me sternly as he poked his head out of his beat-up Nissan Terrano, narrowing his dark eyes at me suspiciously, "Are you listening, Matsu? I'm serious, one bad word and I'm dragging out of that mansion and dumping you in the care of Masaru, Kenzo and Mai. Don't think I won't come down from Sweden personally!" He threatened and I gave him a mock salute as I rolled my eyes.
He really didn't trust me.
Smart man.

"Yes sir, have fun on your honey moon with the troll," I said bitterly which caused him to scowl at me. "Don't call her that. You just don't know her well enough to understand what a nice, caring per-"
"She broke my controller, she threw out all my sneakers, our house smells like a freaking flower shop, she stood on my foot with those ridiculously high high-heels of hers and look what she did to your hair!" I listed as I gestured to his dark curls which were now slicked back away from his face with rose-scented hair gel. Ugh.

Dad glanced at the mirror self-consciously as I folded my arms across my chest in victory.
He sighed as he rested his elbows against the steering wheel.
"Okay, I'll talk to her about those things but please be good. Seriously, get along with the twins and don't make any trouble at your new school. The six months will be over before you know it and we'll all be in Inagi living like a happy family." He assured me and I nodded my head reluctantly. Last time I checked, happy families didn't consist of two nasty older brothers, a bitch of a step-sister, a troll of a step-mum and a traitor of a Dad.

"Whatever, just don't let me see you all pansy-fied when you get back." I looked away from him and I could tell he was smiling. "See you," He revved up the truck and I turned back to face him.
"Make sure the troll goes to sleep before you, you never know she might get hungry and-"
"Matsu," He warned me and I rolled my eyes once again. A bad habit I need to break out of. The eye-rolling habit makes me feel like one of those stereotypical, moody, stuck-up teenagers that always get the most screen time on reality television shows.
"Bye."
"Don't break any windows or be of any inconvenience whatsoever to Hitachiin's. Yuzuha was nice enough to take you in and I've given her permission to bury you alive in the garden if you step one toe out of line," He threatens once again and I raised an eyebrow at him as he backed out of the extremely long drive way.
"Love you too!" I called after him sarcastically and was rewarded with a quick toot of the horn.

I watched the truck rumble down the drive-way in it's rusted-paint glory. It almost made me glad that when I would finally receive my full drivers license that I'd have to buy my own car. I suppose that's what happens when you have cheap-skate father and a mother that would rather buy a car for a kid in Africa than her own daughter. Poos.

Hello, Bonjour, Konichiwa readers...Dad said I had to be polite to everyone so I guess that includes you too.
To start off my name is Ikeda Matsuko, Matsu to those who are too lazy to pronounce the 'ko'. I'm sixteen years old, turning seventeen in August and I have two older brothers and one bitchy step-sister. I have black hair, and my eyes are mutated mixture of green and brown which some of you may refer to as hazel. Just like my appearance, personality-wise there's nothing really special or unique about me. I'm not particularly kind or understanding and I can be a bit moody at times. I'm probably the most sarcastic person you'll ever meet but don't worry, I'll grow on you.
I like Nintendo, my cat, midnight snacks and anything strawberry flavoured. I dislike my step-sister, my step-mum, heights, oh...and being dumped at some rich person's house to live there for six months because your stupid Dad got married to a stupid troll and decided to go to Sweden without you.
I love my family.

I bet you're wondering how I got myself into this situation.
Okay, my mother's a let's-save-the-world type of woman so she does all this charity work for under privileged poor kids .While Dad was planning to go off on his honey-moon with the troll, that was when Mum had planned to go to Cambodia to teach poor kids to read, build houses and nurse old ladies back to health (I know it sounds ridiculous but that's what she does, okay!. I get my consideration-for-other-people gene from Dad)

Mum takes her charity stuff really seriously so when Dad asked her to postpone her trip to Cambodia she gave him the finger and slammed the door right on his hand (My brothers and I inherit our fisty-ness from her, naturally). Of course, Masaru and Kenzo are seventeen and eighteen years old and Natsumi (Evil step-sister) and I are both sixteen which makes us all perfectly qualified to look after ourselves but Dad, Mum and the troll all agreed that we couldn't be trusted all together.

Actually, they all agreed that I couldn't be trusted not to start a fight with Masaru, Kenzo or Natsumi but the only reason why I left that detail out was because it's complete bullshit. They bully me, I'm the victim here! It's called self-defense dammit!
Anyway, Mum asked her childhood friend Yuzuha Hitachiin if I could stay with them for six months and attend Ouran Academy with her sons. Since they're loaded they agreed to this arrangement and the deal was sealed.

Which brings to me to my current position.
I stood on the porch of the largest mansion I'd ever seen in my entire life, excluding all the one's I'd seen on 'Cribs' (I watch too much MTV). I almost felt sorry for Masaru, Kenzo and Natsumi who were stuck in a piddly four bedroom house. Then again, Masaru and Kenzo were probably dragging the trampoline into the living room at that moment and Natsumi could go stick a fork up her ass.

I rang the door bell and banged my fist against the oak panelled door. The door knobs were gold.
Are you freaking kidding me? Their door knobs were probably worth more than our entire house.
The door opened and a woman in a maid's uniform answered door. And no, you perverts, it was black and had long sleeves, a semi-turtle neck and reached past her knees with a white bandanna tugging her thin brown hair away from her face.

"Good afternoon," She greeted me, "You must be Matsuko-sama, you can call me Nami-san, allow me to take your luggage." She gave me a forced smile as I handed her my bags with a raised eyebrow.
"Um, thanks. But you don't have to do that if you don't want to." I said, scratching the back of my head sheepishly.

I wasn't used to people carrying my bags for me. The closest I'd had of a person carrying my bags for me was when I left my school bag near the top of the stairs one day and Masaru came barging into my bedroom and chucked my bag at my face. He'd given me a good screaming-lecture that leaving your bag on the top of the stairs could result in people tripping over it and crashing down the stairs. Of course this only prompted me to leave my bag at the top of the stairs more often.

"It's my pleasure, Matsuko-sama." Nami said in an flat tone. I suspected that it wasn't her pleasure but she decided that she'd do it anyway because she was getting paid for it.

I stepped inside the mansion and marvelled my surroundings. The floor was a glossy black and there was a huge stair-case in the corner spiralling upwards. There was a wide door-way that lead to the lounge which seemed to be complete with a sixty inch television and fish-tank. The fish seemed to be living the life because the tank was almost the size of the whole wall. You could fit a freaking shark in there if you wanted to. Bones would probably drown trying to swipe fish out of that tank. Oh how I missed my moronic yet lovable cat.

There were also many other hallways leading to who-knows-where which seemed to be decked with ultra-fluffy carpet. None of this coffee and cat-piss stained carpet for the Hitachiins.

Maid lady looked at me expectantly.
"Would you like to see your room?" She asked and I nodded.
"Yes, that would be great but where's Yuzuha-san?"

The woman pursed her lips tighter, which was quite an achievement considering how her lips were sealed together in a flat line whenever she wasn't talking.
"She's at work at the moment so it's probably best not to disturb her. You can see her at dinner." She assured me as she tucked a strand of mouse-brown hair that had strayed from her bandanna, behind her ear.

"Nami-san, who is this guest?" A voice asked and I looked up to see that two identical auburn-haired boys had materialized on the stairs with bored expressions on their faces. They rested their chins on upturned palms and blinked at me expectantly as if they expected me to break out into juggling act to entertain them.

"This is Ikeda Matsuko. I'm sure your mother informed you that she was going to be staying ere for six months until her father returns to Japan." She told them as she gathered her hands on her lap and bowed respectfully. Hey! Where was my bow?
"Oh, our new toy has arrived!" The one on the left clapped his hands together excitedly and I frowned. Toy?
They both bounded down stairs with grins on their faces and leaned in close to my face as if to inspect me.

"Hmmm, it's decent I suppose," One of the poked me in the cheek and the other one hummed in agreement.
These were the Hitachiin twins. I'd only met them a few times in my life but whenever I did, I never liked them. I remember when I was about fourteen, I was standing by the pool on a sweltering hot day. I was looking forward to diving in but both of them tugged me back before I could I jump in.

"Before you use our pool, you have to play the 'Which one is Hikaru?' game." They both had said in unison and I scowled. I never gave either of them a second glance when I came to visit their family, they were just two rude anti-social kids, so of course I couldn't tell them apart. After all, they looked exactly the same, I couldn't even remember their names. The only reason why I had come along on my Mum's visit to the Hitachiins was so I could use their pool.

"I don't play games that I know I won't win." I told them and they both frowned.
"Then you're not allowed in our pool." They both folded their arms across their chests decisively.
I don't know if it was from the heat or from my stubbornness but I lost it. I snapped.
"Who said it's your pool? You did nothing to earn the money to build this pool! All you two did was fall out of the right vagina!" With those parting words I leapt into the pool, climbed out, then stormed off to my mother.
What a darling of a fourteen year old I was.
Don't worry, my mouth isn't that bad anymore.

"I'm not your toy," I grumbled and the one of the left tutted.
"Aah, seems like we have a rebellious toy on our hands, we'll have to fix that, right Hikaru?"
"Toys should be obedient." He agreed as he tapped me on the nose.

I resisted the urge to snap his finger in half and glanced at the maid.
"Nami-san, could you please direct me to my room?" I asked her and she opened her mouth to answer before a hand waved in front of her face.

"There's no need for that, we'll escort her." He assured her and the woman nodded and abandoned me with the evil twins, dragging my luggage with her.
I noticed as she entered the elevator the doors slammed against my bags, probably crushing the snacks I had hidden in there. I bet she did that on purpose.
Sighing in defeat, I turned to look at the twins who seemed to be examining me again.
"You need to moisturise your arms. Your legs are fine but those arms look awfully dry." The one on the left noted .

I grunted in annoyance and clenched my fists.
"Listen. I know you two don't like me and I can assure you the feeling's mutual but I would really appreciate if you didn't treat me like a pet." I said, folding my arms across my chest.
They both raised their eyebrows at me.
"What do you mean? Of course we like you, although I don't think you've earned the rank of pet yet. You're definitely still at toy stage." The twin on the right reasoned.
"Maybe even pet's toy stage." The other one added.

I hated them so much.

I could've throttled them both, right there and then. Each throat for each hand.
"You don't like me! Don't you remember? You wouldn't let me in your pool so I yelled at you?" I reminded them as the memories began to tick through their tiny, identical brains.
Both of their eyes lit up at the exact same second. The resonance they had with each other was freakish. Maybe they weren't even twins, maybe their Mum was into cloning or something?

"The one with the dirty mouth? You're right, we don't like you." They both frowned at me, remembering how I'd been rude to them.
I rolled my eyes and frowned back at them. "Great. I'm glad we've come to understand each other. Now, would you please show me to my room?" I asked in a sickly sweet voice and they shook their heads in refusal.

"Let's play a game," One of them proposed, or more like ordered, running his fingers through his silky-ish spikes. "If you can guess which one's Hikaru then we'll show you to your room." The other one continued in a sing-song voice.
Oh God, not this again.
"I don't play games that I know I won't win, I thought you both learnt that two years ago." I grumbled and they both grinned.
"Then I guess you'll just have to find it yourself. Don't worry, it shouldn't be too hard, there are only forty or so bedrooms."
I scowled. Those bastards were tugging me around like a puppet on a string.
I wasn't the type to play the puppet, I was more of a puppeteer or a...puppetress? Was there even a name for a female puppeteer or was the title puppeteer unisex? I made a note to google it later on.

"Okay, how about we play one of my games?" I asked and they both pretended not look interested.
I held up both of my clenched fists and smiled villainously.
"If you can guess which hand I write with then I'll play your game. If you guess wrong, I'll use that fist to punch you in the face." I explained, unable to stop an evil smirk from creeping upon my lips.

"She's violent." One of them noted and the other one cringed in agreement.
"Fine, we'll show you your room, no punching though otherwise we'll make you sleep outside. We won't even give you a kennel to sleep in." He stuck his tongue out at me and I suppressed the urge to rip it right out of his mouth and grind it into the floor.

"Okay, lead the way." I said as they turned their backs on me and began walking towards the elevator. The one of the left, let's call him Kaoru because I had no idea which one was which, mashed the button and with a ding, the doors opened and the boys stepped in the elevator. I followed them inside, only to be pushed back out again by Hikaru (Again, I didn't know which one was which, so I named the one on the right, Hikaru.) .
"What?" I demanded, my hands placed on my hips.

"Your punishment for not playing the 'Which one is Hikaru game' is that have to take the stairs. Once you play the 'Which one is Hikaru game' then you'll level up from 'Toy' to 'Pet' and that will give supervised access to the elevator." Kaoru explained, crossing his arms stubbornly.
Are you serious? It's like being in a video game! This was real life! In real life, you don't level up unless you work for someone and get a promotion!
I don't work for them...unless Mum sold me, it sounds like something that she'd do. She probably traded me for a bag of rice.
Shaking this possibility out of my head I looked both of them dead in the eye.

"Let me on, I'm not playing your stupid game! You two look exactly the same and I hardly even know you, how am I supposed to win a game like that?" I asked as I stepped inside the elevator again, only to be gently shoved out again.
"Well, that's too bad then. Your room's on the third floor by the way, run up the stairs and meet us there, don't be late. If we beat you to the third floor then we'll ditch you and you'll have to find your room by yourself." Hikaru chuckled at this thought and I groaned.
"Okay, I'll play your stupid game." I sighed in defeat and pointed to the one on the right.

"That's one's Hikaru." I guessed and they both raised their eyebrows.
"What's your reasoning for that?" They both asked in unison and I shrugged.
"I don't need reasoning! It's called the 'Which one is Hikaru game' not the 'Which one is Hikaru, make sure you give a valid reason game'!" I exclaimed and they both rolled their eyes at me.

"Well you got it wrong anyway, good luck making it to third floor before us." Kaoru (or Hikaru, I had no idea) grinned at me as the elevator doors clicked together.
Growling under my breath I raced to the stair case. I hated games, especially when other people got to make up the rules but I needed to get to my room. I guessed that the only maid that knew which room I was in was Nami-san and she was long gone, she'd probably already placed my bags in my room. I wasn't too keen on busting through every door of the house in search for my bags and I wasn't sure when Yuzuha would arrive back at the mansion.

My best option was to make it to the third floor before the twins did. I sprinted up the stairs at full speed, using the railing to throw myself upwards and give me more momentum. I ran track at school, mostly long distance so I liked to think I was in reasonably good shape. In fact, when I reached the second the floor, I got there just when the twins elevator was passing the second floor.

I ambled towards the elevator and mashed the button. The elevator came back down to the second floor again and the doors opened to the confused faces of Hikaru and Kaoru.
With a cackle, I darted to and up the staircase as the twins tried to close the door of the elevator again quickly. It seemed that in the fluster of trying to get the door to close quicker, the twins had accidentally pressed the 'Ground floor' button so the elevator went sailing downwards. This elevator seemed to prioritise going down rather than going up.

I pumped a fist in the air triumphantly as I leapt up onto the last step of the third floor, stumbling down the hallway before collapsing in front of the elevator. Shallow breaths escaped from my mouth. Even though I was pretty fit, running three stories up a stair case was a exhausting. I wasn't too exhausted to laugh though.
I rolled on the soft carpet, laughing triumphantly and with a pleasant 'ding' the elevator doors opened to two frowning Hitachiin twins.

"You cheated." One of them accused me, jabbing a finger in the direction of my face.
"I'm sorry, okay?" I panted, "Just please, show me to my room. If you're putting me through this because of what happened two years ago, I'm sorry for that too. Just let me get away from you." I begged. They both laughed.

Not evil laughs either, genuine laughter.
I looked up at them both. Their brown eyes were shining with amusement as they peered down at me with smirks plastered on their faces.
"You really are fun," Kaoru, or whoever he was chuckled as he offered me his hand.
I scowled at his hand but accepted it anyway as he helped me to my feet.
"We're going to have more fun with you later, so be prepared,"
They both smiled at me and swivelled around on their heels, stepping back into the elevator.

"Wait! You didn't tell me which room was mine!" I called and Kaoru smirked.
"We have no idea which room is yours, all we know is that it's on the same floor as our bedroom. Good luck finding it though." He saluted at me and I clenched my fists together as the elevator descended downwards.

Six months. That's approximately one hundred and eighty days, I have to live with these evil twins. Seriously, fuck my life.

I woke up the next morning in a reasonably good mood. Mainly because my wake didn't consist of Kenzo wiping his foot on my face or Natsumi's shrieking because Masaru 'accidentally' walked in on her while she was having a shower (Which is disgusting because they're legally brother and sister. Well, step-brother and sister but it's still gross! ) .My wake-up call was from Nami with a gentle tap on the shoulder.

"Matsuko-sama, it's time for you to get up," She said plainly and I sat up and stretched my arms.
"Thanks for the wake-up call. And also I'd like to thank you for putting a sign outside my door to help me find my room, I would've been completely lost without it." I thanked her and she nodded before quickly exiting the room.

I hadn't seen the twins since the elevator incident because it turns out the twins occupy the third floor and even have their dinner on the third-floor kitchen. I had dinner with Mr and Mrs Hitachiin so that meant I didn't see them at dinner either. Lucky me! (That wasn't sarcastic)

However, my luck ran out when I strolled down to the third-floor bathroom in my boxers and singlet (A bad sleeping habit I got off my brothers) and bumped into two teenage boys who were already up and dressed in their fancy Ouran Academy uniforms.

"You really dress like a commoner." Hikaru observed, stroking his chin thoughtfully.
And yes, I was sure (well as sure as I could get) that it was Hikaru because Yuzuha had told me last night that Hikaru liked to part his hair to the left and Kaoru liked to part his hair to right. This made things a lot easier.
"Commoner?" I asked and they both nodded.
"We did some research on you last night and we found out that your Mum's living off her inheritance money and working for charities and that your Father's an electrician. You also used to go to public school." Kaoru said proudly and I raised an eyebrow at the two morons.

"And you didn't already know that? Do you guys even know why I'm here?" I questioned, staring at them both expectantly.
"Our mum hired you for six months to be our toy." They both answered and I glared.
"I'm not your freaking toy! I'm staying here because my Dad's on a honey-moon with a troll and my mum would rather feed poor Asian kids rice than stay home and look after me!" I roared as I stormed around them in the direction of the bathroom. Let's just say I'm not a morning person.

As I was about to slam the door shut a hand latched onto my arm and I twisted my head to see Hikaru and Kaoru with apologetic expressions on their faces.
"Did we hurt your feelings, Matsu-chan?" Kaoru asked, pouting slightly.
What the hell?
"Not 'We', you're the one who hurt her feelings Hikaru," Hikaru said, folding his arms across his chest as Kaoru's pout cracked into a whimpering, pathetic expression.

"How could you say that Hikaru?" He cried as tears began to well in his shiny brown eyes.
Suddenly Hikaru's hand released my arm and clasped Kaoru's chin, pulling him closer to his face. "I didn't mean it like that Kaoru," He soothed him, using his other hand to stroke his twin's cheek, "Please don't cry. I don't think I'd be able to bear it if another one of your tears spilled,"
"Oh, Hikaru!" Kaoru sighed in a rather girl-ish voice.
"Shhh, Kaoru, don't cry anymore or I'll have to kiss those tears away," He said in a low voice as he tugged his mouth slightly closer to his and-I screamed and slammed the door shut so fast the door frame rattled violently.
What. The. Fuck. ?
What the hell was that?

They can't be incest! Incest is wrong! It's gross! Sure, gay is okay but incest is not!
I had trouble accepting my brother perves on my step-sister...but those two were actually...
I shuddered as I pressed my back against the door.
There was light knock from the other side of the door.
"Matsu-chan?" A voice asked uncertainly and I winced.

"Go away." I groaned as I grinded my knuckles against my eyes in an attempt to un-see what I had just saw.
Oh God. Please go away. They had creeped me out enough already and then they had to do that in front of me? Couldn't they at least have the decency to do that in the privacy of their bedroom?

"We didn't think that we'd scare you like that. I mean, we were only trying to cheer you up," A soft voice said from the other side of the door.
I creaked open the door slightly and poked my head out to raise an eyebrow at the two.
"You were?" I questioned and they both nodded their heads sincerely.
I sighed, pressing my palm against my forehead before glancing back at the twins.
"You thought that acting like...that, would cheer me up?" I asked and Hikaru shrugged. "It works at school, girls like that kind of stuff."

What kind of fucked up school did they go to? Last time I checked, incest was ILLEGAL.
It's supposed to be frowned upon by society!
I suppose they were trying to cheer me slightly though. I mean, it's the thought that counts, I'm not a completely heartless bitch like some Dad-stealers I know, cough, troll, cough.

"Thanks for trying.." I said blandly. It felt weird being polite to them. They both broke into blinding smiles and Hikaru patted me on the shoulder.
"That was nice!" He chirped enthusiastically.
Kaoru clapped his hands together excitedly. "Congratulations, you've now levelled up from 'Toy' to 'Pet' that means we'll show you to your class when we get to school!"
I raised an eyebrow in suspicion that two hyperactive boys wondering if I should scold them for calling me a Toy again but decided to ignore it. After all, Dad told me to get on the twin's good side.

"Yay!" I cheered, biting my tongue in an attempt to stop the sarcasm from leaking into my words. "Of course, since you're our pet you'll have to wear this when we get to school." Kaoru said as he yanked a brown leather cord from his front pocket and held it out to me in the palm of his hand.
I stared at said object in his hand.
It was a leash.
A dog leash.

"We wouldn't want you running wild around the school, you're still only a puppy and who knows what-" Kaoru began before I ripped the leash out of his grip and looped it round his neck. "I'll kill you!" I shouted, tugging at the leather as Hikaru tried to restrain me as I thrashed in his grasp. "Matsu-chan, calm down, he was only joking!" He told me as he pulled me away from Kaoru and the leash, his arms wrapped securely around my waist.
I inhaled deeply and counted down from ten, trying to rid the burning desire to throttle the auburn-haired boy.

"Kaoru, don't do that again. I don't think I'll be able to hold her back next time," Hikaru warned his twin and Kaoru smiled sweetly as he tucked the leash back in his pocket.
"Don't worry. You won't need to hold her back next time, I'll make her wear a muzzle." He laughed and wrenched myself from Hikaru's grip.
"I'll tear your head off!" I roared as Hikaru managed to latch on my wrists and tug me backwards before I managed to get a hold of his skinny neck.

"Kaoru!" Hikaru cried as the twin laughed his ass off.

I want to go home.

A/N: Do you like Matsu? This is basically an introduction to her character and her relationship with the twins. In the next chapter she'll get into more mischief with the twins and she'll meet the host club. Matsu has a bit of a dirty-mouth which is why it's rated T.

Reviews would be lovely, I'd like to know if you like Matsu or not and if the twins are in character \(^-^)/
I'd like to know if any other improvements could be made or if you enjoyed it, and what parts you enjoyed!
Thanks for reading :)