This is for my favorite person in all of Dallas, Pam (aka lostindallas62), for her unwavering dedication to my stories. You don't ask for much, just JATE, which is always so easy to give. You are absolutely fantastic and fuel my continued desire to write. Thank you, for everything.
(ETA: My longest one-shot yet! I guess I missed writing Jex, LOL!)
Panorama Crest Drive had never looked darker to him than it did in that moment, as he drove down the deserted road towards the home he now shared with Kate and Aaron. She collected the habit of waiting up for him when he called, giving the news that he'd be late, and especially when he couldn't find the time to call her to let her know that he couldn't be home early enough to read to Aaron. He pictured her on the couch as he drove towards the house, wrapped up in a heavy quilt, the dim of the television set the only source of light, fighting sleep, and waiting for him to come through the door so she could do what she always did, kiss him until his lungs turned black and pull him up to bed under the steadfast grip of her small fists. It made him feel terrible that he hadn't been available for those slippery, showers they were so used to taking before bed.
Every time he found her that way, he smiled, the only bright spot in a rather dreary day full of blood, broken bones and death. He would quietly turn the television set off and pluck her curled frame from the couch. She'd wake instantly, sometimes with a yawn, but always with a smile, her pea green eyes dimmed by fatigue. She giggled, and never forgot to announce that she almost made it. He silently kissed her forehead once he reached the stairs, climbing them in pursuit of their shared bedroom.
He would pull the large comforter back and sit her up on the sheets, peeling the throw quilt from her warm skin. He'd help her pull the pajama bottoms down her legs and urge her to lay back into the pillows and go back to sleep. She'd open her eyes again, and take his hand, squeezing it tightly, and after a sturdy yawn, whisper the words that always made him pinch himself.
'I love you.'
He smiled every time he heard them, whispering the words back once her long eyelashes rested against her high, freckled cheeks. Her voice was like that of a child when she said it, so pure and genuine. It was everything that he'd ever wanted in this life, this overwhelming swell of happiness and it was real, so real it scared him to death sometimes.
Scared of losing it. Scared of ruining it.
He'd sat in his truck, in the street adjacent to Santa Rosa Mental Hospital, for hours, staring at the lifeless building, its spooky shadows playing over blades of the pale grass of the front lawn. What had he been searching for? Who was he hoping would show up to tell him that this was all a lie? That what Hurley spoke of, about it only being a matter of time was a ploy to hurt him, to make him as crazy as he had become? What drew him back to that place after he left in a dash, denial and defiance seeping his depths? Who could tell him that the Island was really gone, buried under a million tons of saltwater in the Pacific, unable to hurt anyone else he cared about? He had no one to tell him that but himself, and he had never been a good liar.
The Island had already taken so much, and still it tormented him. He could literally feel it sometimes, in moments of silence, that itch that was too far to scratch, but it kept growing, expanding. Whispers that filled that silence emptied thoughts of freedom. Would he ever be free?
The faces of fallen friends painted a veil over his complacency with their rescue and who he could save. It was his biggest regret, that he promised salvation to everyone and could only provide it for a select few. He still embattled himself with that failure, and would for the rest of his life, the survivor's guilt toxic enough to suffocate him. But he had to keep going. He had to hold onto what he had and never let it go.
The black velvet jewelry box sat in the pocket of his slacks. He made a call to the family jeweler, adamant about finding the perfect ring for the woman he planned to propose to as soon as he saw her. He had thought about proposing for weeks now, taking the time to think about how to ask and when to ask, what to say and how to say it, but the natural confluence of that moment never came.
God he loved Kate so much, and wanted to give her all of what he had to offer. She had seen him through it all. The Island, the burden of leadership, the rescue, his father's funeral, the revelation about Claire and she had her own troubles to consider, her trial, raising Aaron alone. How had she done it? How did she have the patience for putting up with him? How could he ask her to put up with him for the rest of her life? Would she even want to? Panic mingled with uncertainty. Everything about her was real, her face, her hands, her smile, her scent, her courage, her stubborn will, her devotion, her love. He wouldn't lose her. He could survive a lot of things, and definitely had, but he couldn't survive that.
Just because he was happy didn't mean that this wasn't real. It had to be. She had to be.
He parked his truck in the driveway, next to Kate's sliver Volvo, and traveled the swiveled, brick-paved walkway towards the front door. He stood under the luminous porch light, and turned the key in the deadbolt. He was greeted with a still, quiet, dark foyer. He moved past the steps and into the living area, finding it just as dark, lifeless. Kate must have decided to give it a rest and carry herself to bed for a change. A bubble of guilt rose.
He stepped towards the stairs. The woodened planks of the steps, plush off-white carpet covering them, creaked under his weight. He noticed that Aaron's bedroom door was ajar, the faint glow of a nightlight crept through the crack of the door. Suspicious, Jack entered quietly, watching Aaron as he slept in the middle of the twin-size bed, his favorite stuffed animal, a pale blue whale, settled in the circle of his tiny arms. His heart bowed with his love for this child. He sat down in the rocking chair next to the bed and just watched the young boy sleep, his little chest rising and falling under the colorful quilt Kate tucked him under.
Jack then noticed that he was sitting on something other than the stool of the rocking chair. He rose slightly and reached under his thighs for the object. He sat back down, the night-light illuminating the cover of Aaron's favorite book, "Alice in Wonderland". He smiled, thumbing through the book's large pages. Aaron always wanted to hear about Kitty and Snowdrop, Alice's black and white kittens, and their zany adventures, Jack thought with a nostalgic smile. Kate must have read it to him before tucking him in, a job that he should have been here to perform. It was sometimes the only time during the day that Jack saw the child, his schedule at the hospital more demanding than ever before, but tonight, he couldn't use his patients as an excuse. His conscience had been the culprit.
He stroked the dusty blonde locks that lay over his tiny forehead. Only then did Jack detect that Aaron's skin was rosier than usual, a little warm and clammy under his fingertips, the obvious signs of a fever. The baby monitor sat on the nightstand, a blinking green light blared, right next to the polished oak music box that he brought over for him. He remembered it from his childhood, and the countless stories his mother told him about the family heirloom, and how the gentleness of the lullaby could settle him at night, especially when he was sick from colic for the first two months of his life, and many fevers thereafter.
Aaron beamed at the sight of it when Jack presented it to him, smiling as he heard it chime harmoniously through his bedroom one night before bed. Jack and Kate stood next to his bed for awhile, watching him literally become entranced by its soft sweetness, falling into an effortless slumber under the elegant notes. Kate revealed to him that she sung the song to Aaron the first year of his life, recalling how it was the only remedy that would help him settle. Jack remembered the feeling that little tidbit brought to him, a sense of belonging, a connection that went beyond blood relation.
'You're not supposed to raise him, Jack.'
He heard it as if he were sitting next to Hurley again, watching his friend succumb to his trapped sanity. Then it echoed, ricocheted. What if he were telling the truth? He bowed his head, deep in thought, his breathing coming out in puffs of sadness in the dark. He looked back up at Aaron, who slept so peacefully, so small and defenseless. God, he looked so much like his mother, Jack thought, tears gleaming in his eyes. He dug his fingertips into his eyes and then massaged his temples, brushing away the weariness that settled. He brought a hand through his hair, rubbing the curve of his head. A part of her lived on, he had to remember that and he wouldn't let her down, not this time.
Could he really do this? The domestic day-in-and-day-out of fatherhood, of marriage? He hadn't had a wholesome example of what that entailed, and he regretted that he never would, but for this innocent, beautiful baby boy and the woman he loved more than life itself, he would try to find out for himself, for them. On that note, Jack lifted the top of the music box, allowing the lullaby to sift through his unsettled heart, and to help Aaron stay settled, his fever on its last leg.
"Goodnight, kiddo." Jack whispered as he kissed the child lightly on his forehead, and stood for the door, leaving it slightly ajar behind him.
He gently sat down on her side of the bed, watching as she slept on her stomach under the covers. She was so peaceful and serene, a calm that he loved so much about her that he hated to disturb her. "Kate?" He called. Nothing. Still unable to rouse her with whispers, he leaned into her, brought a hand to her back, gently nudging her. "Kate?"
She stirred lightly at the feel of his hand, the sound of his voice, and the shadowy contour of him sitting next to her. "Wake up." He finally saw her eyes flutter open, movement. "Hey."
She grinned, sniffling, and rose from her pillow. "Hey," she said as she took in the view of him through hazy eyes, barely open for the dim glow of light shining from the next room stung. "What time is it?" She looked over at the digital clock on the nightstand. 1:08am.
"It's late." Jack confirmed. "I just got home."
Kate scowled in confusion and worry. She pushed herself into a seated position, staring at Jack with now open, concentrated eyes. Something was wrong; she could feel the anguish radiating from him in droves. "Were you working?"
He couldn't meet her eyes, and then it came to him why he hadn't. She would see right through him. She would know that he wasn't at work, that he was halfway across town, being sucked back into the vortex he swore he'd never look back for. "No." He shook his head for emphasis. "I just… had to stop and get something. I just... took a while." He looked shaken, nervous, timid. She saw it, felt it, and it troubled her.
She knew the tell-tale signs of his every concealed dilemma, conflict, concern, what he needed to get rid of and what he couldn't let go of. This was heavy, and she knew it in the way his head drooped, how his eyes darted back and forth with captivation at some random spot in the distance. He looked up at her for the briefest second and then his gaze settled over her face, troubled, but not wanting to burden her with it, quiet, but a storm was brewing. She was wide awake now.
"Hey." She brought her hand to his nape, rubbing the hair at the back of his head, gently, soothingly. "What's going on? What's wrong?"
He took in a breath, hesitant, but ready to just let it all out. "The other night, when I was reading to Aaron, you said...that I was a natural." He paused, staring away from her again, allowing the gravity of that, how much it delighted and destroyed him to sink in. "Do you really…" He whispered, aching to get to his question, but so very afraid of the answer. He looked up at her as he finished his thought, emphasizing the words. "Do you really think that I'm good at this?"
Kate smiled instantly, so happy that he cared so much to be good at being with her and her son, his nephew, their family. Tears came to her eyes. "Yeah." A hushed whisper funneled through, her heart in her eyes, her hand rubbing soothingly over his thigh. She shook her head slightly to punctuate the finality of her faith in him, leaning in so that she cornered him with her confidence. "You're good at this."
Visibly satisfied with that answer, Jack sighed his relief, releasing a breath that he'd been holding for awhile. This was it, as it has always been. She stared lovingly at the liberation in his face, still curious as to why he was asking this at such an odd hour, so suddenly, but she saw how much that response helped him, healed him. The tension in his shoulders dissipated. He closed his eyes as a tight ball of air sifted through his nostrils, then he opened them, their twinkle had returned. He was smiling now, a faint, but obvious smile.
Jack looked up at her, so ready to ask, but the words haven't come yet, at the very tip of his tongue. Kate stared expectantly, curiously, her eyes wide open, fitted with questioning. Jack took a little while longer, then his lips began to move.
"Will you marry me?"
Floored, speechless, overwhelmed, Kate hadn't said a word, so shocked she was unsure if she was stuck in a dream, her imagination concocting this moment, a long-anticipated wish come true. She was losing it on the inside, tears about to overflow, her excitement caught up in her silence, frozen in place. She watched him as he removed a small box from his pocket and opened it. Kate closed her eyes in shock and adoration at the sight of the stunning diamond, tears shimmering down her face, her breath caught in her chest. She smiled this wide grin, gasped, literally vibrating with joy. She looked up at him as a tear rolled down her cheek again, her hand came to his shoulder, massaging. She was so moved, so stunned, and swept off her feet in a way he had to believe she'd never been before. No moment was bigger than this.
Jack looked up from the ring in his hands to her face, as nervous as he'd ever been in his life, that adorable glower of his sucking her right in. Kate had to literally shake the shock and wordlessness away, shaking her head slightly. Once she caught her breath, she softly sighed 'Yes', now watching the beautiful ring in his hands, cornering him again with eyes that were still seeping with tears, so happy she had to remind herself to breathe. Jack's face lit up with a smile, so relieved. Kate was literally at the ready, her hand in position for him to slide the ring home, on her finger, where she would look down at it for the rest of her life and see his face, in this moment, as relieved and overjoyed as he was handsome.
Kate had to make her answer even clearer; she wanted him to know to where there was no doubt in his mind. She nodded, smiled. "Yes." Jack took the ring out of the box and with both hands, placed it on the appropriate finger of her left hand. She sighed and looked between Jack and the ring, the rightness of it was staggering to her, almost too perfect to be real. This was where she'd always wanted to be.
Kate looked up from her hand, still in a state of pure elation, but she had to make it even clearer, definitive. "Of course I will. Yes."
She caressed his neck with her hand again, looking into his eyes, down at his chest, so unbelievably blessed to finally have him. She pulled herself into him, just as he started moving into her. They kissed briefly and collided into each other, chests pressed tightly, finally united, clinging to one another. A silly, jubilant laugh came out of her over the easiness of another smile. She pulled out of the hug, her hands caressing each side of his face, tears still fresh in her eyes.
"Yes." She whispered again, and wrapped him up in a deep, long, passionate kiss. When she pulled away, she pushed her hands underneath his jacket, allowing it to fall from his broad shoulders, her hands cupping them roughly before travelling back to his face, crashing into his lips again, not allowing him a second to catch his breath. He slipped his arms out of the jacket's sleeves before he wrapped them around her securely. He wanted to, needed to be with her as much as she desired to be with him, it was all he could think about the moment he saw her.
She climbed into his lap, not able to stand the remaining centimeters of distance between them. His hands came up from her hips to comb through the weighty, wavy bundle of her curls. He felt like he was drowning, an effortless, exhilarating glide into powerlessness, the woman in his lap took the reigns, directed the flow, and eased his pain. What was this influence that she possessed over him? This enchantment that made life so much simpler when she was in his arms?
She pulled from the kiss again, intent with undressing him at warp speed. She tugged at his tie, a little too roughly. Instead of loosing it, she was tightening it, and only realized her mishap when Jack began to cough. His hand came up to relieve the tie from around his throat, looking up at her with tempered panic and quiet amusement. She was going to kill him before they got to the good part, he thought with a struggling smile.
"Oh. Sorry." She laughed. Slowly, she loosened the tie's knot and dragged it over Jack's head as slowly as she possibly could. She then focused on each button of his shirt, content with the prize of the warm, rosy skin of his broad chest underneath.
He knelt down with her, gently placing her within the sea of pillows scattered at the top of the bed, admiring her with the golden brown flecks in his eyes. She reached for him when she felt his warm, wet lips on her stomach, his large hand cupping the curve of her spine as he dragged her pajama shorts down her legs with her underwear and threw them over the side of the bed. He moved towards her face, dragging her pajama top over her head, her supple, full breasts in full view, unhindered, nipples erect, begging to be licked. She lay before him now completely naked, exposed, her legs open wide, her crotch glistening, swelling and her skin hot to the touch. The scent of her tantalized his nostrils, making him hard instantly.
He pulled away from her momentarily, reaching for the lamp next to the bed. With a flick of his wrist, light filtered through the lamp shade, moving darkness to the bay. He grabbed the baby monitor and turned it off, placing it back in its spot next to the alarm clock.
"What are you doing?" She chuckled.
He reached for her again, pulling her under the streaming light, smiling cheekily. "I want to play with your body and I want to see every bit of it."
She moaned in protest, her hands continuing their quest to get him bare-chested. "What if Aaron wakes up and needs us?"
Jack helped her with her cause, rising to shrug out of the shirt. He gripped her waist once he was free of it, unwilling to stop touching her as he crouched over her, in control of when and where he touched, what she would feel next. "Trust me, he won't. It's been taken care of."
She cocked her head curiously as it lay within the tides of her curls, now drizzled over the pillows, contrasting wildly with the eggshell white of their cotton cases. Her eyes were sparkling with humor, feigning disapproval. "So you planned this?"
That devastatingly handsome smile of his was even more remarkable to her when he was being mischievous. "Of course." She knew he was joking the moment he said it, playful laughter shone in his eyes.
She smiled, shivering as she felt the scratch of his stubble pinching into the softness of her shoulder, his lips feasting over the erratic thump of pulse at her neck. God, she wished that he would shave, but in moments like these, she welcomed the rustiness of prickled hairs against her skin, fueling her passion.
"You are so fucking sexy Kate, and I mean that in the most romantic way." He said with a breathless laugh from his squatted position.
She reveled in the glow of his attraction, dragging her fingers over the rippled muscles of his back, over his shoulders and through the curt strands of his hair, mussing its neatness. She arched into him, the feel of his steely chest compressing into her achy breasts made her crotch moisten even more, so wet and open, she felt herself seeping onto the sheets beneath her. She reached for the zipper of his slacks, unzipping him slowly with care, rising up to push them down his thighs with ease. She met his eyes as they collided into each other, catching the dark, desirous look there. His mind feasted on every inch of her before his mouth could make the sensations concrete.
She finally reached her mark, her fist gripping the scorching hot, satiny silk, hardened shaft of his cock. She slowly pulled him out of the confines of his boxers, admiring how incredibly taut he already was with what little they had done so far and what they still had yet to do. She looked up at him, her lips wet from licking them with the tip of her tongue, her eyes wide with absolute astonishment. He knew that she wanted control of this; that impassioned glare in her eyes was too strong to miss, too familiar to deny. She rose into him, her arms laced around his neck as her lips hungrily invited themselves over his again, their torsos melting into the heat that radiated from their skin. His erection was trapped between their embrace, begging for entry, for attention.
Something inside of Kate shifted at the feel of him against her. She broke from the loving, tender kiss with a soft shove, urging Jack to lie on his back as she hopped onto his lower torso. He was soon sprawled underneath her tight, fit package, so perfect he couldn't believe she was all his. He drew an imaginary line from the space between her perfect breasts to the tuft of dark curls at the meeting of her thighs, ready to play with her pussy until she screamed, but he forgot his train of thought when she gripped him in her soft hands. She never broke their gaze, even as she rose slightly, placing him in position at her hole and impaling him slowly, then stopping once he was seated fully inside of her, watching him with heightened wonder. Jack closed his eyes tightly, hissing emphatically at the perfect fit, still in need of going deeper.
"Ooooh yes." He moaned breathlessly, his hands at her waist and thighs, squeezing her there, already urging her to move on him.
She smiled as she moved up and down on him, straightening her body, throwing her head back, and increasing her motion, riding him hard, unashamed at the naughty words hissing from her mouth, open with a pleasure she couldn't keep to herself. As soon as he felt himself reaching the pinnacle, release ready to burst like lava from an unstable volcano, she took all of the sweet bliss away by rising off of him, disconnecting. She quickly placated his desperate grunt of frustration with a breeze of a kiss, climbing completely off of him, his glistening erection bobbing around with her sudden movements on the springy mattress. Masked by that adorable squint of his, he looked down at her questioningly, brokenheartedly.
"What are you doing?" He asked immediately, his tone surprised and not at all amused.
He watched as she made her move, perching herself strategically over his lap, on her knees, anchored by her hands gripping the sheets. Her nipples brushed over his muscled thighs, causing a subtle quake, her intentions clear by the light sway of her bottom in the air. She met his eyes, her bottom lip caught in between her teeth, her hair raining over her shoulder, daring him with a cocked eyebrow, challenge in her eyes. All she did was smile, but in that one smile was his entire world.
A rushed giggle rose to his chest and released as he mounted himself on his forearms, watching this perfect creature kneeled over him, begging for attention in this position. She knew exactly what she was doing, watching as the remaining reservoirs of blood in every other part of him pooled at the juncture of his thighs, rising, reaching. He raised his entire upper body towards her, grabbed her face with one hand and planted a deep, driving kiss to her lips, while his other hand traveled the curve of her fleshy, cute behind. She could feel how crazy she was making him, it was in his kiss, in his groin, everywhere. He pulled his legs from underneath her, and kneeled right behind her, mesmerized. She was going to be his wife, his to love, protect, adore for the rest of his life. Judging by how hard it had been to get to this point with her, the back and forth, broken hearts and misunderstandings, could life get any better than this?
They'd made love so many times, weekly, daily, but she always made this feel like it was the beginning and end of the world, their births and their deaths mingling into the time they shared themselves with one another. That was how he felt anyways, and judging from the way she shivered with want, she felt the same. She rose and turned slightly to see what he was planning when he stopped her with a firm hand at the swell where her back met her behind.
"Stay down." He demanded with an aching groan, his voice quaking, his hands shivering, caressing the back of her thighs and coming back up to grab her butt cheeks.
She did as he bid with a rascally grin, lowering her upper body over the bed sheets again, her head lying against her crossed arms, anxiously anticipating. She immediately felt his warm lips on her, swirling his tongue against her flesh, biting, nipping at her back and shoulders. He moved her hair to the side, laying light kisses along her neck, whispering sweet, encouraging words into her ear about how sexy she was and how he couldn't imagine his life without her. She felt so protected, guarded under his long, lean, strong frame, his arms and legs caging her in.
Suddenly, she felt him back away from her and she wondered what he had in mind, but she figured it out when she felt his fingers, one or two at the most, penetrating, probing, entering until they were soaked, deep, tickling her spot. She smiled, gasped, bowed. In and out, in and out they went, slowly, then quickening the pace, then slowly once more. He bent down into her core, his tongue driving deep inside of her, his nose and chin knelt unforgivingly within her slippery crease, the sucking noises drowning out her surprised yelp, and the frantic beating of her heart.
She cried out loudly, fisting the sheets between her fingers, the strong, familiar lace of pleasure slicing through her as he continued to feast on her, his tongue hungry, insatiable. She came quickly thereafter, panting, quaking, her knees buckling, her thighs squeezing together, locking his now saturated face. She felt him retreat from touching her when her grip softened, allowing her time to recover. In that moment, he desperately needed a camcorder, so she could see how gorgeous she was, what he saw every time they came together this way.
He leaned over her, making sure not to touch her. She felt stuck in the position, ready to feel him inside of her, rocking her with pleasure she never experienced with anyone else. The small distance between their flesh was agonizing. She moaned again, speechless, wiggling her backside against him, the feel of his erection against her thigh making her wetter. He smiled then, lost in the desire that she never ceased to show him.
He entered her from behind with one, quick thrust. She let out a long, contented sigh, the familiar invasion more electrifying each time it happened. She knew that she would never grow tired of this, of wanting, needing to make love to him. The highlight of her day was when she could see him, touch him, be near him. He bent down, curving his chest perfectly over her back, his fingers intertwined with hers, each digit naked but for the engagement ring that sat proudly in a tiny sliver of moonlight, a sparkling emblem of the ultimate union, the ultimate promise that two people could possibly make to one another.
He pumped into her savagely but with so much gentleness, the mattress beneath them squeaking, the headboard banging unpredictably against the wall. She chanted his name, squealed, revered, voiced how good it felt to have him hilt as deep as he could go, greedy with more as she urged him to go deeper. Unable to stand it any longer, he pulled her upper body off the bed, her back planted against his chest. He gripped her waist, guiding the depth and speed, grunting through each collision of their groins, his breath hot on her neck and ear. She met his thrusts with her own downward gyrations, finally finding their mutual rhythm, deep and long, terse and shallow, then a delectable mixture, more sweat forming on their skin as they slipped and slid against each other. Their thrusts escalated until they fell off the edge together, panting and moaning, cursing, howling to the moon, crushing their centers together as the blinding blast of satisfaction numbed their senses.
He kissed the back of her neck sloppily once he regained control of his own faculties, obviously tired, sated, but his arms still banded around her waist protectively, steadying her as she came down from her high, her cries becoming quieter, but never losing their praise. His hand moved to the valley between her breasts, pressing there to steady her against him. Her heart pattered with a frenzied pace, in tandem with his own. They remained in that position for sometime, stuck in some medium between heaven and earth, basking in the stratosphere. He urged her to lie down on her side as he lay right behind her, spooning her from behind, lightly disconnecting their sensitive, exhausted loins and gently cuddling her with both arms still around her waist.
He held her with purposed intent, showing her that she was the center of his peace, his sanity. This was unrivaled happiness at its best.
"You're amazing." She moaned moments later, her body slack and damp next to his equally limp and humid bodice. He grinned at the compliment while his hand came up to her forehead, swiping at the small dots of sweat that collected there. "Do you think other people experience what we just did?"
"Nope." He said with complete confidence, brushing his lips over her bare shoulder. "I got home and you weren't on the couch like you usually are. I figured you forgot all about me."
She turned into him, settling herself onto his chest, her eyes still dilated with desire as they took in his face. "Don't be silly." Her lips sought for his, landing perfectly against them, lingering, sampling. "I wanted to be near Aaron in case he called out to me. He's been running a high fever all night. I gave him some medicine and finally got him down a few hours ago." She absentmindedly rimmed his nipple with her fingertip. "I think I'm gonna take him to the pediatrician tomorrow."
He combed his fingers through a messy tendril at her temple. "No, you don't have to do that. It's just a fever, it'll break soon enough." He yawned, hugging her into him.
This was a testament to how great of a mother Kate was, he thought. She was really worried about Aaron, even though he was on the edge of a pretty common fever that was typical for children his age. He rubbed his hands over her back lovingly, his concern for Aaron just as strong, but his perceived outcome less dramatic. In his experience with parents of sick children, the mother was always more dramatic than the father.
His voice was soft, simple. "Don't worry. He's gonna be okay."
There was something about the way Jack said it that shook Kate to the core. There was a self-confidence, a secure, poised attitude that had nothing to do with his medical degree. Jack knew that Aaron was going to be okay, because it was a natural, parental instinct that he was honing, pitching to perfection. He caught her watching him, her eyes watering again.
"What?" He asked, concerned with the sudden turn in her mood.
She grinned through her imminent tears. "You sound different."
He wasn't sure how he sounded any differently than he had before, but he humored her. "What do I sound like? Your future husband by any chance?"
"Yes, that!" She chuckled enthusiastically, twirling her beautiful engagement ring around her finger, her left hand pressed somewhere between his upper and lower chest. She considered her next words carefully, his eyes glued to the sincerity of hers. "You sound like a dad."
Jack's eyes watered on impact, truly touched by Kate's words. He smiled, because it was true. While he would always struggle with the way in which things came about, he sounded like a father, had just proposed to be a husband, forsaking all others for the one person who held everything true in his life. Everything was finally coming together in such a beautiful way.
"I just…" She was speechless as she lifted her hand to view her ring in the dim light that scattered through the blinds of their bedroom windows. She turned towards him, a single, happy tear falling down her cheek. "We're getting married." She laughed when she heard that light boyish giggle grumble from his lungs, filling the room. "Are you sure about this?"
He nodded, not missing a beat. "Yes." He brought his thumb to her cheek, wiping at the lone tear that still travelled. "You?" A wide smile greeted him, rows of pearly whites bright, perfect. She let go of a breathy laugh, content and real.
"Yes." He stroked the slick skin of her back, cradled her to him, cupping the back of her head with his hand, watching her collapse against him. He ran his fingertips along her spine and smiled to himself when she moaned.
"You won't regret this." She said.
"Regret what?" He asked.
"Wanting to be with me for the rest of your life. I promise that I'll make you as happy as you make me." She said drowsily, her voice trailing off, and then a yawn punctuated.
He looked down at her and realized that she had fallen asleep. He was on the verge of tears again, but chuckled through them, amused by how adorable she looked, still naked and flushed from their torrid activities. He moved her into the curve of his side, and reached over her, flicking the switch on the lamp, drowning them into darkness and turning the baby monitor back on, pleased to hear silence through the speaker.
"I could never regret someone as soft, sweet and beautiful as you." He whispered against her ear. He kissed her cheek while bringing a blanket over their cooled bodies, sleep coming easy.
"I love you." It was the last thing he heard himself say before he surrendered.