AN: This was written for a DN kink meme. Decided to post it here...

…

"Light-oooo… Apple! Give me an apple!"
…
"Light-ooo… I NEED an apple about now… Light!"
…
"Light, are you listening to me? Light!"
…

All this noise in the background was something, which the brilliant Yagami-kun was very well used to and had learned to shut off completely. Ryuk should have known better than to expect him to respond when he was in the hotel room where the Kira investigation took place.

True, today Light had starved him of apples, but that was intentional, just so he could make the shinigami look around the other rooms of the hotel suit that were not opened to Light's access. That kept Ryuk busy for a little bit, but once he was done sniffing around (and found nothing of great consequence) he was back to bother Light while the latter was busy pretending to be friends with L and "helping out" the investigation.

However, the friendly game was once again turned into L's efforts to accuse him of being Kira and Light defending himself. All the while being friends of course. The two argued for some time and all the while, Ryuk insistently pestered Light. That was slowly getting on Light's nerves, despite his best efforts to ignore the shinigami and soon he was overreacting to L's petty jabs.

Something Light said caused Ryuuzaki to stand up and so did Light.

L never backed down on a challenge and he stepped in close to look deep into Light's eyes with that unnerving opaque stare of his.

Light was ready to take that, and stared L back in the eyes.

"Hey Light-ooo…"

He heard Ryuk right behind him but he paid the shinigami no mind. By now the entire task force had stopped what they were doing and had turned to stare at the standoff. Finally L opened his mouth to speak.

"Light-kun agrees with Kira's methods, and he has the self-righteous personality and childish naivite needed for Kira's…"

The detective never got to finish his sentence.

In the first moment Light didn't register what was happening… rather, refused to do so. One moment he was meeting L's stare and in the next he was flying towards L's face, flinging his arms around the detective's thin shoulders to catch himself, leaning his entire body's weight into the unlikely embrace and suddenly their lips connected.

And all of that happened because Ryuk shoved him from behind with his monstrously strong pat on the back, which was aimed to grab his attention, most likely. The winy, idiotic-monkey bastard!

In the next moment after all these realizations and feelings flooded Light's mind came the painful clash of teeth against teeth, and the inevitable falling off of balance moment, in which Light had to make a choice what to do with his body. How suspicions was it going to be if he just fell on L out of nowhere? It was better if it looked intentional no matter how crazy it was going to look if he just randomly jumped the detective to make out with him in front of everyone. But it was better than anything else, because if they found out about Ryuk, Light was fried.

The teen grounded himself close, intimately close to the detective's body, both shoes on either sides of the detective's feet. With one hand he clasped the detective's chin and the other one snaked behind to cup the detective's nape, pulling his face closer. He forced the detective's jaw to open and leaned in further, shamelessly plunging his tongue inside the gaping sugar-coted cavity that was L's mouth with not courtesy or lip caresses. L's body was as stiff as a board, instinctively pulling back with his rock-hard stomach, which was now tightly grinding to Light's abs. Releasing L's chin, Light grabbed the detective's waste and pulled him in, stepping one foot between L's legs and pressing their hips together forcefully.

He heard L grunt at that, as well as his father slip to the ground unconscious (something which he constituted with one quick glance to the side before closing his eyes tightly shut once again). Light was all too aware of the shocked atmosphere in the room, as well as Aizawa storming out, as he continued his assault and felt nausea creep in his blood from the taste of all the sugar and the cold wetness and absolutely artificial taste of L's mouth. His fingers entwined in the dry black hair stopping the first jerk of resistance which L's head gave. Light used his position of grinding into L to keep the man immobile and even allowed the hand on L's waste to go further down and feel off his ass, hoping to humiliate the man at least as much as he was humiliating himself.

He didn't want to let L go before he was certain that L was going to regret this at least as much as he was. In fact if he could only get L to…

L's mouth slipped away from him, the detective managed to jerk himself away and to press his palms on Light's chest. Light grabbed his chin once again, yanked him forward and the detective crashed into him again, this time completely out of balance, leaning into Light as the latter licked and forced opened his mouth before shamelessly and teasingly licking his lips and inserting his tongue inside once again. The entire display must have been as obscene as it could get but at the same time, these were the sort of raw things did it for Light and apparently did it for L as well, because the detective did not resist. In stead Light felt the shivers of the electric reaction inside the other man's body. He felt a twitch run all over L's body and suddenly the black-haired men was pressing himself into it as well, and Light could feel that they were both growing hard and hot together. That was exactly what Light had wanted. He wanted to arouse L, just so that the detective wouldn't feel as if he had the moral ground in that situation. It was definitely worse to have been assaulted and to have liked it then having assaulted someone, in Light's twisted mind.

So, with as much will power as Light had, he forced himself out of the heated making out session, that had come about from that incident. L really was grabbing at him hard and wasn't ready to let go, but Light all but shoved him off.

There was some sweet satisfaction to know that L wanted him badly now… despite everything.

The teen stepped back and tried to catch his breath as quietly as possible and to glance around the room as discreetly as he could. Everyone had looked away or was hiding their face, with the exception of Matsuda who was staring with disbelief and a slight blush on his face. Suddenly the younger man came to his senses and began chuckling.

"Well, well…" he brushed his fingers through his hair and looked away.

"I love you, L," Light said suddenly in order to justify the scene. "I am sorry, I just couldn't hold myself back any longer."

"I can't believe this!" Mogi commented.

"Awww! That's wonderful! True love exists! But wait, maybe we should take care of the chief – he seems to have passed out from joy…" Matsuda chattered, but nobody listened to him.

Light felt his cheeks burning. He was going to rage about this humiliation once he got home and he was going to find a way to take revenge on that shinigami!

But the most pressing problem was L's reaction. The detective had forgotten all about his accusations, or so it seemed. Most probably, it only seemed that way, because his dark eyes had acquired that very cold and calculating quality again. It looked rather comical now, with his lips reddened and swollen, the pink blush that was making his face look more alive and younger than ever, and that little problem that only Light knew about.

L stared at him now, his lose shirt hanging asymmetrically over one shoulder from where it had been pulled by the earlier commotion. He was about 2 meters way (a safe, kiss-proof distance).

"I love you too, Light-kun," L said suddenly. Nothing in his expression suggested that these words were true.

L had not believe him (obviously) and Light knew not to believe L. Light had just unwillingly stepped up their game. Now they were going to have to pretend to be not just friends but lovers.

All because of Ryuk's stupidity, because everyone knows that L doesn't back down on a challenge.

'God damn it!' Light thought, already seeing in his mind's eye where this was going to take them. He knew that neither of them wanted it (or so he told himself), and yet they were going to do it, because both of them hated to lose.

Was there a limit to how far they would go? The answer for Light and for L had always been "No."

END!