This took me waaaaaaayyyyy longer than I said it would, and for that I'm sorry. I hope it was worth the ridiculously long wait! : )

"I never thought that you'd be the one to hold my heart"

Who would have guessed that I would fall for Damon Salvatore of all people? Well, a lot of people guessed that, but still, I never thought that Damon of all people would end up being the one to hold my heart. But if there was one thing that I learned through all this vampire craziness, was that not everything turns out the way you thought it would.

"but you came around and knocked me off the ground from the start"

If I were being perfectly honest, I would have to admit that I had felt something for Damon from the very moment I saw him. How could I not? The boy was smokin'! All hotness aside, I had felt a connection with Damon when he scared me for the first time in the boarding house. My feelings for him had only intensified, especially after the infamous Georgia trip. It really was the point in which everything changed.

"you put your arms around me and I believe that it's easier for you to let me go"

Even after I finally let myself acknowledge the fact that there was something between Damon and I, I never let it get farther than wishful thinking and daydreams. I truly believed that it was the best thing for everyone if I just ignored my feelings for him. But it's getting to the point where I no longer think that that's possible.

"you put your arms around me and I'm home"

Because lately, well lately, we've been going through a lot of crap. And whenever I felt myself getting overwhelmed and scared out of my mind, I found myself most comfortable in Damon's arms.

"how many times will you let me change my mind and turn around?"

Even though reasonably, there were far more scarier things to think about, all I could ponder was how many chances I had left. How many more times would Damon come back to me even after I rejected him? I prayed to God that there was just one more each day, because each day I told myself that tomorrow would be the day I laid my heart out for him. And each day, I rejected him still.

"I can't decide if I'll let you save my life or if I'll drown"

And then there was the ultimate dillema of him always saving me. Often I thought about how much pain and suffering I could have saved us all if I had just died in the car crash with my parents like I was supposed to. Should I let him save my life for the millionth time and let him risk his life or should I just let myself go, so no one else would get hurt? I knew he would kill me if he knew I was even pondering the idea. The thought, oddly enough, made me smile.

"I hope that you see right through my walls"

Whenever I was caught in one of those moments were I had to lie right to his face about my feelings for him, I wished briefly that he would look me in the eye and call my bluff. That he would see straight past my walls and know the truth. That I was deeply in love with him. It sure would make things a whole lot easier for me.

"I hope that you catch me, cause I'm already falling"

The thing that scared me the most about loving Damon was the uncertainty. Did he really love me? It may seem like a funny thing to ask, I mean, he does sure act like he loves me. But is it true love? Or am I just his distraction? Will he still love me once I am no longer someone to chase?

"I'll never let a love get so close"

After my parents died, I kind of told myself that I was done with love. To me, if I no longer loved, then I was safe from any emotionally damage. Then Stefan came along, and I broke my vow. I loved him. I truly did. Did you notice how I used the past tense? I can't love Stefan any more, he's made it incapable for me to love him. I told him I wouldn't love a ghost forever. I meant it.

But with Damon, it's like he sneaked up on me. I didn't consider him anyone I would love, so I shared with him things I had been keeping inside in an attempt to free myself from it without truly letting someone so close. And then all of a sudden I realized that Damon had become that close. And that I was no longer telling him these things because I needed an outlet, but that I enjoyed telling him these things about my life before him. Things about my life now that he was here.

"you put your arms around me and I'm home"

Somehow my mind began to consider Damon's arms home. Lord knows how hard I tried to reverse it, but the thought just wouldn't budge. So I found myself giving in, I found myself having more and more intimate encounters than I should have. But I couldn't even fathom the thought of trying to stop it.

"the world is coming down on me and I can't find a reason to be loved"

It was the worst when I was stuck in one of those I'm-a-horrible-person moments. The ones where I felt the weight of the world on my shoulders and I blamed myself for every single thing that went wrong. Those were the times when I craved his presence the most. Because I could always count on him to tell me how ridiculously stupid it was to blame myself for everything that went wrong. He knew the feeling of self-hate. He understood.

"I never want to leave you but I can't make you bleed if I'm alone, you put your arms around me and I believe that it's easier for you to let me go, I hope that you see right through my walls, I hope that you catch me, cause I'm already falling, I'll never let a love get so close, you put your arms around me and I'm home"

He promised me he would never leave me. I believed him. But could I promise that I would never leave him? I certainly didn't want to, but I couldn't help but believe that that would be the best thing for the both of us. If I was gone, I couldn't hurt him anymore.

"I tried my best to never let you in to see the truth, and I've never opened up, I've never truly loved 'til you put your arms around me, and I believe it's easier for you to let me go"

It's easier for him, if he lets me go. That way I couldn't hurt him anymore. At least, that's what I kept telling myself. But really, that would just be easier for me. If he didn't love me anymore, than I wouldn't have to confront my feelings for him or put my heart out there. I was being selfish.

"I hope that you see right through my walls, I hope that you catch me, cause I'm already falling, I'll never let a love get so close, you put your arms around me and I'm home"

Because the truth was, the love I felt for Damon scared me to death. It was so powerful, so definite. Damon was my home. Plain and simple. But the thought of loving something, someone so much was scary for me because I was used to losing the people I loved. I didn't want to lose Damon. Hell, I couldn't lose Damon. As in, I don't think I would find it possible to live in a world without him in it.

"you put your arms around me and I'm home"

I didn't want to lose another home. But I think the greater tragedy would be to never let myself have something like that in fear of losing it.