Disclaimer- I own nothing.

Edit- I realized I have no warning.

Warning- Alcohol use/abuse, swearing, innuendo, mentions of drug use/abuse, mentioned yaoi, het, maybe also yuri and if I'm feeling adventurous maybe lemons later on.

Edit 2- Now with new and improved grammar! WOOP.

AN- These are going to be short drabbles, inspired by textsfromlastnight .com. Which is the best website in the whole damn world. I may also borrow ideas from FML .com. Props to Soyna, I borrowed this idea from her and put a KH twist on it.

Prompt- Oven mitts.

"I'm not sure how to tell you this."

Axel blinked at Demyx with bleary, hungover eyes that didn't make life nearly as interesting as life with beer goggles and couldn't quite comprehend what could be so important to wake him up at such an ungodly hour; In actuality, it was two in the afternoon, but Axel's mind couldn't quite comprehend that either.

"I have an oven mitt I need to return to you tomorrow."

In his hungover stupor, Axel blinked again, in bafflement, wondering why the blond decided to tell him this now, and why he couldn't give it back now. So he could shut himself in his dark room with a bottle of painkillers.

And vodka. Lots of vodka. Because, well, you know, the cause is the best cure.

"And you didn't bring it back now, why?" Axel asked, a sharp edge to his tone, an Axel before coffee is not a very happy Axel.

Demyx blushed red, up to his ear tips and muttered under his breath, avoiding looking him in the eye at all costs, even if it meant staring at Axel's chocobo print boxers.

"What. What did you say?"

"Me and Zexy went back to his room together and I had the oven mitt, because I thought that I needed one, I'm not sure why, I think it had something to do with cookies, and somehow it ended up in the bed while we, well, you know. And now it has...stuff on it," Demyx blurted out, almost to quickly to resemble anything close to English.

~That explains the hair.

Axel blinked again, which he noticed seemed to be happening quite often during this conversation, although this time it was to clear the images from his mind.

~New reason for more vodka.

Maybe it would fry the images out of his brain. The nightly sound effects were bad enough. "You can keep it," He said in a rush, blushing nearly as red as Demyx.

The blond nodded and without further ado, hurried off, probably go wallow in embarassment.

Axel stared after him, grumpy still, although a little amused.

At least, until he realized something.

~I don't own oven mitts.

The confusion, and hangover were back.

~I need a drink.

...Meanwhile, on the other side of the castle, was an equally confused Xemnas, who was in the process of trying to make a cake, to surprise Saix with after he woke up, the blue haired man liked sweets far to much for someone supposed to be an evil Nobody with anger management problems. Although, Vexen did like those awful books, the ones about a sparkly vampire, whatever that was, and that girl, Something-Or-Other Goose, far too much for a mad scientist.

The Nobody's of Organization XIII seemed to be a clusterfuck of contradictions.

Take Xemnas for example, highest ranking member of a league of somewhat evil people, baking a cake. Well, trying to, as he was also blinking, and staring at the hook on the wall in the kitchen, where his oven mitts usually hung, and was perplexed to find only one.

AN- Bahh. I love TFLN. You people reading this should go look at it. If anyone has a text they know, PM me and I'll see what I can do. I won't accept any given through review. Though, review please?

Whole text- I don't know how to tell you this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow.
Best. Fucking. Text. Ever.