Disclaimer: I own nothing relating to the Twilight Saga.

Who I am

Preface: Failing to Remember

The rustling of leaves fills my ears, awaking me. I squint from the sound, my hearing extremely more sensitive than normal. I slam my eyes shut just as soon as I open them. What little light shines, is enough to cause my head to throb with vigor. I groan as I push myself up into a sitting position, the crunching of the leaves continuously flowing into my ears. I extend my dry tongue from my mouth to wet my dry lips. Abruptly, I pause as a burning graces my bottom lip. Delicately, I slide my tongue farther down. The bitter, iron taste of dried, crusty blood lingers on my taste buds.

I run the back of my hand across my eyes, as I push myself up to stand. I find it hard to put weight on my right arm, a soreness has taken its hold. I examine it to find deep purple marks. I take my left hand placing it over the marks. A perfect hand. Telling by the thickness and span it's a man's. The fact that it's still purple, tender to the touch, I know it's one of the other pack members. One of the manlier ones.

The wind rustles through the trees above me, I can feel the breeze cooling every part of my skin. Confused, I push my head down. Not a stitch is left on me. Well, I hated that dress anyway. I don't have time to worry where it is. My problem now, is to find out how the hell I got into the woods from Sam and Emily's reception. Emily wouldn't be very pleased with me losing the dress. Although I did look pretty good in it, but I look good like this-

I stop dead in my tracks as I notice my legs. Dried blood stains my russet toned inner thighs, sliding down to my ankle where it abruptly stops.

Snapping my head up, I take in a deep intake of air thinking that the smells around me will trigger any memories of last night. But none come to mind.

Instead, I find it utterly difficult to remember anything.

Could've I gotten so drunk as to forget everything that happened last night? No, I couldn't have. It's not possible. Yes, I drank. But it wasn't for pleasure. It was just a way to numb my feelings for the time that it could. And the time that it could wasn't for very long.

I sigh knowingly that I have to go through the whole day, leading up to now. That is if I want to remember anything.

I run through every part of my memory, only to piece a few things together. Earlier that day, before the wedding my mother had given me a speech about how to 'Act nice' and 'It's Emily and Sam's big day. You don't want to ruin it, do you?' No, that was the last thing on my mind. If only I could've ruined it. I think I'd be much more happier now and not stuck in this dilemma. I come to the conclusion that I didn't start drinking until the reception. Well, that's a lie. I had smuggled a few sips from Embry's flask before the 'I do's.' I remember dancing wildly at the reception with Embry, Paul and anyone that wanted to dance with me. I always managed to have a drink on the dance floor. But with the amount of grinding and being what I am, I definitely burned it all off. The last thing I come to remember is that I pissed off one of the wolves, resulting in the bruise on my arm.

Remembering nothing more.

A distant howl form deep within the forest, notifies me that my pack members are searching for me. I decide that now is the best time to leave the woods. As I walk down the trail, leaves crunch with every step. I decided not to phase as I know the questions that I will be bombarded with. Nor do I have the decency to tear myself away from my present thoughts and answer them.

I stop in my tracks as a familiar fabric touches my feet. I glance down to find the demolished remains of my thong. My favorite one at that, too. I crouch getting close to the forest floor, clutching the cotton in my hands. I lift my head as the breeze carries the identifiable smell of my perfume mixed in with something I quite can't pick up on. I spot bits and pieces of the navy blue silk, hanging in shards from the bushes and limbs around me. Abruptly, I pick up my pace, snatching any piece of fabric I see as I pass.

The fast pace of my walking turns in to a jog. Suddenly, I find myself in a full out sprint, heading for the little safety of my home.

As I run down the rocky drive way, I fling the pieces of the dress and thong into the trash. I make a mad dash to the side of my house. I extend my arms above my head, jumping to reach the tree limb above me. I yank my body to where I'm sitting on the branch. I continue to scurry up the tree until I'm at my window. Luckily, I left it open.

I hurl myself through the pane, my feet landing with a soft thud on the carpeted ground. I pause hoping no one has heard me.

"Leah?" my mom calls from down the hall. "Honey, is that you?"

I hurriedly stride across my room, and into my bathroom, as I hear her footsteps nearing my room. I slam the bathroom door, locking it. Pressing my bare back against the coolness of the door, I try to ease my heavy breathing. All of the soreness sets in, and it's almost enough to cause me to fall to the floor.

I turn toward the mirror sitting above the sink, glancing through my dark, wind-tangled strands of hair that have fallen in my face. For a moment I stop my heavy breathing, pausing any intake of air. Slowly, I drag a trembling hand up to the left side of my neck. I hiss in pain that is now burning through my neck and into my veins.

Removing my hand from the wound, I examine it. Hastily, I clutch my bloodstained hand into a fist.

What the fuck have I gotten myself into this time?

TBC