Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy.

A/N: Just a little something I jotted down. I'm completely heartbroken without Kozik. I love you Kenny Johnson and you will be missed on the show! Also, I feel as though I didn't write it as well as I could have but I'd really appreciate it if you let me know what you think. Hope y'all enjoy it!

Sloane Morrow-Kozik's racing heart grew heavy in her chest. Her lungs tightened up and she couldn't breathe no matter how hard she tried. As her eyes began to burn and well up with tears, she leaned against Tig for support after he revealed the news that her husband, Herman Kozik, was dead.

Dead.

Clay Morrow was re-introduced to the feeling of remorse. He killed one of his oldest friends, beat his old lady to a pulp, and tried to kill his daughter-in-law multiple times in the past week but nothing compared to putting his own flesh and blood through the turmoil of losing the love of her life. The cartel was his idea. The cartel was the reason his son-in-law was blown to pieces. This was entirely his fault.

Sloane knew it was his fault. She was so angry at her father. She was past the point of resentment as she stormed into the chapel at the clubhouse. "How could you," she muttered, tears streaming down her face. "HOW COULD YOU!" she yelled again.

"He was so close, SO CLOSE, to getting out of Charming and back to Tacoma. This whole cartel was a STUPID idea. It's done nothing but rip SAMCRO to shreds and it's entirely YOUR fault," her face was beat red as she continued to yell at her father, the man who raised her, the man who valued her life more than his own.

Clay sat in silence. He deserved far worse than Sloane yelling at him. He had spun out of control, power and greed engulfing his conscience.

"I hate you," she muttered the words, not a slight hint of emotion seeping through the words. Clay was dead to her. Her eyes grew dull as she turned and walked quickly out of the chapel. She walked past the crew her eyed her with sorrow.

Jax Teller watched his step-sister head to her Chevy Equinox. He was concerned about her mental well being. As he headed into the chapel to confront Clay about every little thing that was going on, he turned to Tig. "You need to watch her for the next few weeks. She's gonna lose it. She loves Kozi more than anything in the whole entire world."

"You got it," Tig nodded before quickly hopping on his bike. The ride over to Kozik's house seemed like an eternity to Tig. He felt guilt, for holding such resentment towards Kozik over the past eight years. He actually liked the guy and just when they were starting to get along, the worst happened. Kozi was blown to pieces.

Tig knew Sloane would always blame Clay for this. Hell, even Tig blamed Clay. That's one of the reasons Tig had handed over his Sergeant at Arms patch to Clay earlier in the evening. He didn't agree with any of the actions that were being preformed.

Sloane walked into her home … their home, she immediately broke down. Furiously, she ripped down the painting near the door and threw it against the wall. "WHY?" she yelled, walking across the room to the book case and throwing everything across the room. Broken glass, books and shattered picture frames were scattered across the floor. She flipped the coffee table before heading back to the bathroom.

'This isn't fair,' she muttered, her mind flooding with disbelief. She stood in front of the mirror, closing her eyes trying to imagine his touch one last time. She opened her eyes and stared at the wrapper sitting on the bathroom counter. Already opened, she pulled out the contents and stared at the two pink lines.

'He didn't even know,' she thought as she fell to her knees. She planned on telling him as soon as he got home. She tried to get him to see her before going to the club but Clay insisted on seeing Kozik first. She didn't want to live without him. She couldn't live without him.

Without thinking, she started the bath water. Growing up, she was a blessed child. She had a father who adored her, a great step-mother and step-brother who loved her like she was blood. Yet here she was, about to commit suicide.

Sloane let out a small chuckle as she shook her head in disbelief. This was the only answer for her; the only way that her family could be together again.

'Don't do it,' Kozik's voice filled her head as she reached into the medicine cabinet and pulled out a bottle of sleeping pills.

"I have to," she replied without pausing. She hesitated before opening the bottle and dumping a handful of pills into her palm. Before she could change her mind she swallowed the handful of pills. Her mind was racing as she climbed into the bathtub, fully dressed.

How long would it take? Would it hurt? Will Kozik be waiting for me? Will our baby be with us too?

She knew her thoughts were insane. Before she knew it, she started to grow tired. She saw the white light as her eyes slowly drifted shut.

Tig opened the door to the trashed house. "Sloane?" he called out. When he didn't receive an answer, he immediately grew concerned. He ran shouting her name, looking in each and every room. That's when he saw the light of the bathroom. He heard the running water. He knew what he would find when he opened that door.

For once, Tig prayed. Tig prayed he was wrong and that it wasn't too late. He prayed that Sloane would be okay. He prayed that they all would be okay. He knew it wouldn't be right away but he knew it would be someday.

Sloane opened her eyes and Kozik was standing right in front of her. It was almost like a dream, except she could feel. She ran to the man and tightly wrapped her arms around his waist. She felt the warmth of his skin as he returned the hug, holding on to her with all the love he could muster.

"Sloane, I love you," he whispered into her hair as she pulled free from his grasp.

"I love you too Kozi .That's why I did this … so we can be together," he smiled, but a sad smile. His pale blue eyes glistened with heartbreak.

"I'm sorry Sloane, but it's not your time. We will be together again one day. I promise you that. But you're still needed on Earth. You need to raise our baby."

"I don't understand," she said, cutting him off.

"Sloane, you're not dead. Nor will you die from this. Tig's saving your life as we speak. He's called an ambulance and they're on their way.

"But I don't want to be saved. The moment you died, I died too," he reached out and brushed her soft hair behind her ear.

"You're strong Sloane. You'll make it through this. I'll always be with you, I'm your guardian angel," he told her and she sighed. Suddenly, she grew worried.

"The baby? I didn't lose it too? I-I-I screwed ever-r-rything up, I'm so sorry," she quickly stuttered.

"Sloane, my death is not the end. I need you to be strong, can you do that?" he asked and she nodded. Knowing their time was just about up he leaned down and placed one final kiss on her soft lips.

"Gawddammittt Sloane, wake the hell up," Tig had just gotten off the phone with 911 and was trying his best to make sure the girl he was holding in his arms was still breathing.

He sighed in relief when she slowly opened her eyes for a second. "Tiggy," she faintly said. He knew they would have to pump her stomach but he was enthusiastic that she was still alive. The club couldn't handle another loss so soon. He pulled her out of the tub and cradled her in his arms.

"Damn girl, you've got yourself a guardian angel, you know that right?" he said.

"Something like that," she smiled up at Tig before shutting her eyes once more.

"We're all gonna be alright, I promise you that Sloane."

"I know," she muttered once more as the sirens blared throughout the neighborhood. Minutes later, the paramedics wheeled the stretcher into the room and took the petite girl from Tig's arms. It may have been the worst day in her life, and the worst choice she had ever made but it was the beginning of healing; a process that would take years, and years and years for Sloane.