A/N: Hello again, dear readers. I am proud to present the epilogue to My 17th Year of Torture, Drama and Misery! Hopefully, you enjoy it. I'm also here to announce that, at least for now, I am officially retiring from in order to write more stories about some of my own characters. Again, I would REALLY love it if you'd check out my Wattpad account, apprenticeofathena. I recently posted a story named Politically Incorrect that I think fans of this story will like. The main character, Stella Harvey, kind of reminds me of Max. It's a mystery, by the way. Here's a summary of it:

Stella Harvey is America's sweetheart. Or, at least, that's what she's been told. In a tragic accident, Stella lost the past five years of her memory, meaning that she doesn't remember her father's new wife, doesn't recognize her new makeover, and certainly doesn't have the slightest clue that her father is the President of the United States. In an effort to remember, Stella begins to search for clues about the five years she's missing. Clues that lead her to shocking revelations about her past and even more questions. When did Stella become popular? What happened to her life in New York? And, most importantly, was the accident really an accident?

And there you have it. I'm gonna post a link to my Wattpad account on my profile if any of you want to check it out. Thank you so much for being so supportive of everything I do guys! Obviously I've never met you but I'm definitely gonna miss you! Mwa, mwa!

2100. 2100. 2100. 2100.

I got a 2100 on the SATs. A score which, I am proud to say, is higher than Fang's score by 300 points. Seriously, can you believe that? 2100! That's like, waaaay above average. In fact, I'm willing to bet that I'll need to be hanging ivy on the walls soon. (Get it? Because I could get into an Ivy League school? Haha. Aren't I hilarious?) Now all that's left to do is actually visit the schools I'm considering. Off the top of my head, I'd kind of like to go to Columbia for journalism. Because even if I don't plan to attend poetry readings at vegan cafes, I do like to write. And who knows? Maybe I could make reading the newspapers actually interesting.

Until college, though, I'm still living with my mom. You know, sticking to our plan about being home-schooled and all. I'm currently writing an essay about the trial for my college applications. (I know, right? My entire life has become about college. It's painful, trust me.)

Ella, Ari and I have all become closer, too. Even though I don't go to school with them anymore, sometimes I walk them down there in the mornings. Turns out, if you spend some time with them, they're not that bad. Ella's actually become one of my closest friends. Kind of. It's kind of been revoked since she told me she likes Iggy. Because I am not letting my little sister date that man-whore. No way in hell.

And now, the moment you've all been waiting for: Fang and I are going out. Whoo. Cue thunderous applause and confetti. We're not super lovey-dovey, though. We're serious about each other, which is good, but it's not like I make out with him every time I see him. Only sometimes. (See? You know I'm funny.) Really, we don't want it to screw up our entire group's friendship. Which is why, today, on my eighteenth birthday, we all went out together. Me, Fang, Nudge, Ella, Iggy, Angel, Gazzy, Mom, Ari. We went for fondue in the East Village. And damn, was it good.

Of course, my super annoying friends couldn't resist humiliating me just a little bit, so Gazzy farted Happy Birthday to me as the staff brought out a gigantic, chocolate fondue fountain and a pile of marshmallows, fruits, cheeses and breads with a sparkler stabbed on top as a candle. So we got some dirty looks for stinking up the place. I was the birthday girl; I got what I wanted.

"Make a wish, Max," Nudge clapped. "Before I blow it out for you!" I rolled my eyes at her and leaned into the candle. I breathed in exaggeratedly, building the anticipation, until I finally extinguished the flame once and for all. What did I wish? If I told anyone, it wouldn't be you, dumbo. That's the point.

So, finally, my life as an adult is beginning. It's what I've been waiting for all year, and now, at long last, it's here: My 18th year of college, craziness, and happiness.

(If you didn't realize, the story is over now. So, uh. Bye.)

A/N: Review again please! I'll miss you! Remember to check out my Wattpad!