Note: I decided to revise this story. Its former title was Yellow Roses. What a boring title, and it was a boring story. It's a gift for author StoryMaster64. She was generous enough to give me some very good ideas. Initially I wanted to ask her if she'd like me to draw a mustache on the Mona Lisa too, but that would be juvenile! After all I wrote this story to cope with some issues, but now these issues are resolved, and the true nature of this story can be revealed. Don't worry; the will still be nookie in this story, just a little, uh, classier nookie, and not so much gore. Some of the chapters that never made it to the actual story will find a home here too. Please read and review. ^^

Several dozens of airships were docked in the sky over Earl and Countess Koopwick's estate. Wealthy and noble Koopa couples emerged from Warp Pipes. Relatively few of them came unaccompanied, regardless of age. Bowser watched with annoyance as a little Koopa boy, not older than six, taking the hand of his equally tiny date. "Madame, let me get you a glass of berry cider."

"Oh come on, that's not normal!" Bowser barked, and proceeded by pulling the uncomfortable dinner jacket. "And why did you persuade me into this haircut? I look like a total tool!"

Kamek leapt from the Doomship's ramp. He was formally dressed in his Tyrian robe. "This is Koopa Village, Your Largeness. Everyone here is so pleasant it's to die from."

The event took place in the manor's garden, which had been extravagantly decorated. The tall hedges were decorated with thousands of colorful lanterns. There was a large outdoor stage and a horseshoe table below, where seats for the royal guests were marked with their respective coat of arms. Bowser had to shake hands with a lot of affluent Koopas he for some reason didn't like, and probably already had a lot of anger he was bound to release upon someone, so Kamek decided to consume every beverage offered.

The expression on Bowser's face was not promising as a mingling couple, the Lord and Lady Kooperton, told him all about their lives and of their vacation resort for Koopas "He just had to visit sometime".

"You would love it there, Your Majesty," Lady Kooperton said energetically. "It's beautiful and always full of the most charming young Koopa ladies in the world. Many Toads also reside there."

"That's nice; Dart boards are always useful," Bowser said dryly. The only thing he hated more than women were Mushroom People.

The couple's smiles were replaced not by disgust, but concern. Lord Kooperton took the word, for once, and led his wife away. "Let's go get something to eat, dear."

Bowser turned to Kamek, his life-long caretaker. "I wanna go home. NOW!" A fireball jumped out of his mouth as if it feared him.

"I'm sorry, Your Sickliness, but the Koopwicks insisted that you attended this occasion. You're meeting with them tomorrow for lunch, and I dare suggest…" He lowered his voice. "That you practice making a good impression. We cannot afford to fall further out of favor with the Koopa Villagers."

King Koopa crossed his arms and looked resentfully at the aging wizard. "That's a new record. Tanked before dinner." Kamek replied with a very audible hiccup.

Bowser had gone through a painful divorce a few years ago from his first wife, who had tried not only to make way with his money, but with their son Ludwig as well. However, his grandmother's will declared that he had to internationally strengthen his crown by marriage. He had the choice of finding someone at the Koopwick's garden festival, or employing a matchmaker. Both were unlikely to him.

Feedback from an old microphone made the crystal glasses on the dinner table crack. The party planner, a female Koopa with a mushroom pin in her lime green hair, walked up on the stage in front of the curtains. "One, two… Gentlemen, ladies, distinguished guests, Your Highnesses and Majesties," she actually curtsied. "Isn't this the best party ever?"

Everyone cheered. Bowser felt sick.

"To crown this evening of awesome, please welcome the Krool Koopharmonic Orchestra and the Koopville Troop!"

The curtains opened and lit a dozen sparklers, which were drowned out by the applause. The Orchestra and the Troop were bigger than sliced bread in the Mushroom Kingdom, and them being here was the experience of a lifetime for many of the guests.

The musicians began playing a romantic, but upbeat waltz as the many performers appeared one by one and began their glittering ribbon dance. The Troop consisted of the smallest Koopas Bowser had ever seen. They reminded of little, sparkly Christmas tree decorations.

The music intensified and the performers danced in a circle, revealing the tenth member, balancing on her left foot on a sparkling gold circus ball. Bowser had been bored to death until this point, where she danced to the edge of the stage and blew the audience kisses. His jaw dropped; and his breath vanished. He was both hot and cold at the same time, and his heart had either stopped beating, or was beating like crazy. The limelight was now focused on the Koopa dancer, revealing her bright yellow shell. Her dance consisted of perfect flutter jumps, twirls and moves seemingly impossible to any Koopa. She turned around as Bowser approached the stage and he caught her eye. Her gaze was magnetic; it was as if her dark eyes sparkled just for him. They said: "Oh, and by the way, I stole your heart." She smiled.

"Kamek!" Bowser whispered and shook his manservant. "Who is that?"

Kamek's cheeks were obviously flushed, and there was blue lipstick on his untidy collar. "That, Your Rottenness, is Eleanor Koopville. Her father was that British schmuck with the lazy eye, and her mother's a real b..."

He didn't have time to finish before making a Technicolor yawn. Several people nearby withdrew in disgust.

The music reached the end of its climax and the dancing Eleanor stood perfectly on the tip her clawed foot and reaching her arms in the air. The audience praised her with thundering applause, and she bowed at them along with the rest of the Troop.

As soon as the curtains fell, Bowser set course for the backstage, where the dancers were having a breather. He demanded to be directed to the dressing rooms. There was a Starman reading "Speedy Yellow" on the door he didn't bother to knock before entering.

Eleanor Koopville, AKA Speedy Yellow sat at her vanity drinking champagne from the bottle while cleansing her face. "Alice, if that's you again, I've already told you…" Speedy's voice died as she turned around and her eyes fell on Bowser. She was even more intriguing to him now that she had removed the glitter wig and costume. Her real hair was blonde and tangled, with each tangle ending in a colorful tip. She had no horns, of course. No female Koopas do, but she had two orange stripes on her right temple.

"Milady, I am King…"

"Majesty," she interrupted with a curtsy, which was tradition among noble and royal British Koopas.

"Yes, I was wondering…"

"Are you planning a party?" She asked with a polite smile.

Bowser smiled deceptively. "I am."

"If you want our troupe to entertain your guests, we'll be soooo honored. Just contact our manager on this number." She searched through the inside pocket of her short dressing robe. The card she left in his hand was warm. Bowser presented a bouquet of roses he had nicked from a centerpiece. "Your performance was, uh, cool beans," he said smoothly and planted a kiss on her hand.

"Th… Thank you, Sire," she said; breathless. "Yellow roses are my favorite." She held the bunch to her face and had a deep sniff.

"And I just love you, Speedy Yellow," Bowser said to himself as he closed her door. "I can't wait to make you mine forever."