This is obviously a parody of MoA so I expect ppl to see it as such. I'm not here to flame other stories or characters, this is all just good, clean fun. Also, some characters might turn ooc (or will they?) but that's just necesary for the story's humor. Pleas enjoy!

I don't own PJO or HoO, and many of you should be grateful for that.

Our story begins with the landing of the Argo II right in the middle of Camp Jupiter. Many thoughts ran through the minds of the Romans at the sight of such a battleship. Were the Greeks here to help them? Would there be war or peace? Who was the moron that decided to park the big boat in New Rome and destroy some of the newly restored buildings?

As the hatch opened, breaths were held, until a young boy with curly brunette hair came out waving a pair of white boxers tied to a stick. Now Leo Valdez was thoroughly embarrassed but what was the poor guy to do? He had forgotten to bring the traditional white flag so he had to improvise. Good thing that he liked wearing the classical type of underwear because Jason's sky blue boxers with small lightning bolts on them might have sent the wrong message.

"We come in peace so please don't blast us!"

The Romans relaxed a bit, or maybe they were too shocked by the pair of underwear, no matter the reason they lowered their weapons as more people came out of the ship. All eyes stopped on a tall blond boy who most of them recognized as their beloved long lost praetor. Jason raised his hand and the crowd went wild. Or was it that they were screaming at Leo to put the damn boxers down?

"Romans, I have returned!" The obvious observation was ignored.

"I bring brave Greeks with me. Friends that have welcomed me in their home and taught me their ways! They are not enemies! I swear it with my life!"

He smiled as the Romans began to cheer. Most of them didn't know why but it was fun. A girl with chocolate brown hair stood beside Jason and slowly took his hand. She offered him a loving smile and the boy glanced at her, gave a short nod and then returned his attention to the legion.

"Romans, I bring another great news! This beautiful angel by my side is Piper McLean, daughter of Aphrodite. It took me less than four days to fall in love with her. I don't know why but she is hot and I just randomly decided to make her my girlfriend in front of everyone." He held Piper's hand into his own and looked in those deeps orbs which changing colors made him dizzy. "Piper, do you accept to be my girlfriend?"

"Oh, Jason! I've loved you since day one even if I knew that my memories of you were fake! I always hoped that my fangirl dreams will one day come true! I will follow you anywhere, even to certain death, without questioning your decision!"

Thus the two lovers confessed their feelings for each other and turned at the crowd to see their reaction. However, no one had heard them because no one cared. All eyes were now on a blonde girl that ran towards their new praetor, Percy Jackson, and threw her arms around his neck. People gathered around them as they began to dance with their arms wrapped around each other. The friction was so powerful that a small cloud of dust began to appear. Suddenly, the sweet and innocent Hazel Levesque voiced the thought that went through everyone's mind.

"Are they making out or wrestling?"

Alas, Hazel, that's one mystery that not even the great Athena could answer.

Meanwhile, Leo had finally hidden the underwear and made his way towards the Romans. His eyes landed on the beautiful praetor, Reyna, and he stared at her for a few moments. He then walked towards her like a drunker because Cupid had sent an arrow straight to his heart.

"Beautiful. Perfect. Who created such a masterpiece? Let me examine you!" He threw himself at the two hounds that belonged to the praetor but the pets quickly made a dash behind their master and looked at Leo in a frightened way.

"Now, now, lovelies. There's no need to play hard to get. Leo just wants to take a closer look." He made his move but was stopped abruptly by Reyna's foot that smashed against his face. The boy landed on his back and froze on the ground with the hope that if he played dead the girl wouldn't hurt him.

Percy and Annabeth had finally stopped their…well whatever they were doing and slowly approached Leo. "Where are the rest of the Greeks?"

The son of Hephaestus arched his brow before standing up, glancing at Reyna just in case she wanted to attack him. "Oh they'll be here in a day or two."

"What the heck do you mean a day or two? Aren't they on the ship?"

"Dude, are you joking? It's just the four of us and Grover. It's not like anyone cares for characters like Clarisse, Butch, the Stoll brothers, Clovis, Katie-" He caught his breath before he continued. "Rachel, Chris and so on and so forth. They're walking here so it might take awhile."

Percy had a face palm moment before looking at Annabeth who shrugged her shoulders. "Don't look at me, I was too busy worrying about you to really notice what these idiots were doing."

The son of Poseidon opened his mouth, probably to let out a few swears in both Greek and Latin because he was now multicultural but he was interrupted by Grover.

"Don, is that you?"

From the fauns that have gathered around to witness the fiasco, Don took a few steps forward and stared in disbelief at Grover.

"Grover Underwood? I don't believe it!"

They run towards each other in a heartwarming scene and hugged tightly, laughing like children. You see their story is truly a sad one. They met when they were nothing more than small cubs mowing the same lawn and instantly became friends. However, their families were against such friendship. One was a satyr and the other was a faun and the two should have never interacted. Eventually they were pulled apart and they never saw each other again until this tearful moment.

"I thought someone finally snapped and killed you and threw your body in the sea!"

"I thought your bones were rotting in some Cyclops's cave!"

"It's good to see you again, Don!"

"Same here, Grover!"

Tears were shed, the crowd applauded and everyone was happy. For about a few moments until Reyna cleared her throat and everyone looked at her. The praetor, who was still ignoring Jason and Piper who were now sending desperate signals for their attention, smiled at her people.

"Romans, the Greeks mean us no harm. Let's allow them access in the city."

"They're already in the city."

"Yeah, they fucking landed on it."

Reyna's icy glare was enough to shut everyone up before she continued. "We will let them rest until evening when the meeting of the senate will take place. Since there are only a few of them at the moment they will stay in the dorms of the fifth cohort."

As she said that she was expecting Dakota to step forward to lead the Greeks but he was nowhere to be found. Gwen looked around nervously hoping to spot the boy before Reyna went on a rampage and strangled him.

Unknown to them, Dakota was resting near a tree nervously writing in a small notebook.

Dear Diary,

Today suxs so much! Stupid Graecus and their stupid warship! Landed in the city!

Who's gonna clean all that mess? The fifth cohort that's who! Reyna is gonna

bitch and then send death glares. I should have listened to mom and become a dentist.

He paused as he heard Gwen calling for him and heaved a sigh.

GTG. Stupid Gwen is stupidly calling for me. Oh Diary, sometimes I think you're the only one that understands!

With that he closed the notebook and juggled towards the rest. "Hi, I'm Dakota. Yes, I know that's a girl's name. No, you're not allowed to make fun of it. I'm the fifth cohort of the centurion." He blinked when he realized what he said. "I mean I'm the centurion of the fifth cohort. Now let's get you in the dorms."

With that he gestured to everyone and the crowd began to break. Left behind were the tragic lovers, Jason and Piper. Their confession of undying love had been ignored and that worried the young hero.

"Piper, I-I don't think we can be together anymore."

"But Jason we only started dating a few minutes ago!"

"The whole point of us dating was to create a couple that fangirls could write hundreds of stories about but now no one cares! I am the perfect son of Jupiter and you are the perfect daughter of Aphrodite and together we were supposed to be the perfect match! No, we must create some drama for the fans. I will break up with you and pursue Reyna in the hope that a love triangle might save our shallow relationship."

He raised the fist to the sky and lighting stroke in the background. As he made his way to the camp, with Piper closely behind him cursing her sad life, a wild Octavian was hiding behind a bush. Not creepy or suspicious at all. Despite his warnings Reyna the bitch allowed the Greeks to land. He must strike now and crush them like the cockroaches that they were. He began to laugh manically and crawled out of the bush.

"I shall not lose one moment of sleep and plot their defeat! To the secret hideout!" And thus he hurried towards the secret hideout, which was Jupiter's temple and obviously wasn't secret but let's not kill dreams.

What should you expect in the next chapters? The love triangle that you were all waiting for, that's what! Who will Scipio choose, Arion or Blackjack? And what about Leo? Will Aurum and Argentum ever return his feelings? What will Jason do in order to get back Reyna's affection and how far will Piper go to be with her dream man? What about the rest of poor characters that had to walk all the way to Camp Jupiter? Everything will be explained in the following chapter!

Grover and Don really like reviews so please make them happy! You want the satyr and faun to be happy, right? RIGHT?