a/n: Woo-hoo! I finished it! Started this morning around 9am and ended 9pm. It's pretty rushed, and...yeah. IT DOESN'T REALLY MAKE SENSE. Please blame it on my sleep-deprived, Super Junior-obsessed brain (Eunhyuk and Leeteuk are my bias, but I find them all hilarious).

for: Unicorn Paige, who requested for SasuSaku hot monkey loving. I hope you like it, Paige. ILUUUU. (alsoalsoalso, lemme know if you want another hot monkey loving *winks*)

This is unbeta-ed. Pardon the mistakes. :)

It was on her seventeenth birthday when Sakura finally decided to move on from her so-called everlasting love with the one and only remaining Uchiha of Konoha.

. . .

And then, on her eighteenth, Sasuke decided he wanted her back.

. . .

The Consequences of Meddling

by: cutecrazyice

. . .

"He is probably the most stupid person I have ever encountered in my life," Ino whispered to Hinata, placing her martini in front of her mouth in the guise of drinking. Hinata, about to drink her own martini, nodded her head sadly.

Shikamaru, having heard the whisper, raised a brow at his blonde teammate, not bothering to hide the fact that he was eavesdropping at their conversation. "And who are we talking about here?" he asked – though he already knew the answer.

"Well, duh," Ino replied, rolling her blue eyes. "Who are we staring at right now?"

"They're staring at Bastard," Sai supplied, not really understanding that Shikamaru had asked just for the sake of asking. "The one who's strolling across the street with Dickless and Ugly. The one who's staring at Ugly as if he wants to ravish her."

Sai's companions stared at him as if he had grown two heads until Ino shook her head in disagreement.

"Actually, I think it's more like longing," Ino sighed, hearts almost dancing in her eyes. Hinata and Tenten nodded in agreement.

Kiba scoffed. "It looks like lust, alright."

"It looks more like boredom," Neji stated.

"It looks like endless love," Shino murmured.

All heads turned to him as if he had grown three heads, which made him turn pink underneath his shades.

"It is the look of youthful admiration to the most blossoming flower in our village!" Lee declared in the calm demeanor that he would never have had had it not been for Ino's training one year ago, when she had pitied him after he embarrassed himself in front of his civilian girlfriend's father. Chouji nodded in agreement, enthusiastically bobbing his head and chewing at the same time.

"What the hell are you guys talking about?" Shikamaru countered, sighing. "He looks as emotionless as ever."

"You have to look underneath the underneath," Sai supplied.

"It's boredom," Neji repeated.

"It's yearning," Tenten argued, glaring at him.

"Pure, unadulterated lust," Kiba contradicted.

"Youthful burst of—"

"Look, look, whatever," Ino interrupted before chaos could ensue. "The point is—we have to do something. Now."

They all agreed for the first time that night.

. . .

The flowers started coming three days after Sakura came out of her day off from the hospital. There was a single yellow rosebud inside her locker, a single pink rosebud on her office desk, a single white rosebud on her doorstep at home and a vase full of red roses on her kitchen counter. Beside the vase was a small card. Normally, this would have irritated the pink-haired kunoichi (what the heck, someone barged into her apartment?), but the gesture was so cute that she couldn't help but be curious. And confused.

When she opened the card, her confusion only grew at what she read.

Sakura,

I can't think of any way to apologize. You know I'm not the kind of person who does it upfront. I would appreciate it if you don't mention this to anyone.

-S

...was Sai apologizing to her for being rude?

. . .

Since Sai didn't exactly bring up the topic with her – which Sakura figured was his way of saying that he didn't want to discuss it out loud with her – Sakura decided to respect that and only tried to smile more at him. The next day, when she got home from work, she found a chocolate cake on her kitchen counter. The sight made her mouth water at once, but she hurried all the more when she saw another card propped beside the cake. She opened it.

Sakura,

You know I don't really like sweets, so I thought you should have this.

-S

Her mouth dropped open and the card fell out of her hand when she realized something.

Sai lovedsweets.

. . .

When Sasuke saw the piece of paper that was propped on his kitchen counter, Naruto was at his mansion, eating ramen and noisily trying to point out the health facts that each serving of his favorite food contained.

"Dobe, what is this?"

"How the hell should I know? And stop trying to interrupt me – I'm saying something important here!"

"Hn."

He opened the paper, expecting a prank or some crude joke to jump at his face.

Sasuke,

You're very sweet. Thank you for everything. I hope we can be friends.

-S

"Hmm. I think that's from Sai," Naruto said. It appeared that he was reading over Sasuke's shoulder.

The raven-haired Uchiha doubted this was from Sai. Besides, he knew the handwriting.

But why would Sakura send him this?

. . .

"Look, your plan is all wrong," Shikamaru said, tugging at his hair in slight impatience. "We need to backtrack and make sure that they don't get to talk about it – otherwise we're gonna be busted."

"Well, Sakura should not have sent him that letter," Ino pointed out. "And that was really stupid of you, Naruto – who the heck would believe Sai would write something like that?"

"Hey! I was just trying to deviate his attention! I was helping!" Naruto argued.

"That was nice of you, Naruto-kun," Hinata mumbled. She blushed when the blond boy grinned at her and squeezed her hand in affection.

"I think we need to re-plan," Tenten announced.

"We kind of figured that out," Neji intoned dryly.

Rolling her eyes at the glaring in-denial couple (well, Tenten was glaring and Neji was smirking) and at Lee and Kiba going at it with their love versus lust argument, Ino held up a hand to get everyone's attention. Not that it worked, of course.

"OKAY, SHUT UP, ALL OF YOU!"

That worked.

"Good. Now, let's get on with the revised plan."

. . .

Sasuke,

I'm not writing this letter because I have a childhood infatuation on you – I'm way past that, believe me. I know how I made you uncomfortable and how silly that was, trying to get your attention when I should have just trained harder. I've moved past that stage. I don't carry a torch for you and this is embarrassing enough as it is.

Why am I writing this?

I thought of you last night.

I don't know why. Sometimes I want to talk to you, but I'm not really sure if you'd like that. But you've been nicer lately, so I guess it's okay.

No need to reply to this. Let's just pretend I never wrote you letters, neh?

-S

Sasuke stared at the basket beside the letter, filled with his favorite fruit. Tomatoes.

. . .

Sakura,

I'd feel really awkward if Naruto found out I'm actually writing this. He'd tease me. You know how he is. So let's just not talk about this, okay? And no need to reply. You've talked a lot for both of us that I feel it's my time to tell you things now.

I hope you had a good day. I know you've been busy at the hospital, so I wanted to give you this. You know, in case you aren't eating well.

-S

Sakura stared at the bowl of fresh strawberries at her kitchen counter, all juicy and ready to be eaten.

She smiled.

. . .

One week later, Sasuke bumped into Sakura while he and Naruto were headed to the hospital – a fact which Sasuke initiated subtly, on the pretense that they were to get some files from the records room.

A fact which had Naruto panicking, as this was not part of the plan. Not yet.

"Teme, what's the point of all this? You know we could just train and I could beat your ass again. That's more fun."

"Dobe. Tsunade-sama ordered us to do this."

"You requested for this."

"Hn." Translation: Shut up.

Because it wasn't working, Naruto decided to change tactics.

"You're here to see Sakura-chan, aren't you?" the blond teased, a smirk spreading on his face. "I bet you miss her like crazy!"

To which Sasuke merely glared. An improvement, nevertheless.

"You're not saying anything, so I'm pretty sure it's true! You want to see her and ravage her and – oh, hi, Sakura-chan!"

Naruto waved, while Sasuke, after finishing being startled (not that he showed it), merely looked at the pink-haired kunoichi fly toward them with stacks of files in her arms.

"Hey, guys," Sakura greeted, trying to balance her files and talk at the same time.

"Sakura-chan, I'd help you with that, but the dobe and I are kind of in a hurry right now to get Baa-chan's—"

"Let me carry that."

Naruto's mouth would have dropped open, but he stopped it before it could happen (See? He had good reflex) and simply stared as Sasuke took the paperwork out of Sakura's hands and proceeded to balance it with ease.

"Thanks, Sasuke," Sakura said softly, smiling at him. He didn't smile back, but his mood seemed to have lightened.

A lightbulb went up in Naruto's head.

"What are you guys doing here?" The pink-haired medic nin asked.

Sasuke replied without hesitation. "Tsunade needs files. Naruto will get it."

Ah. So that was his plan. Naruto grinned. "Sasuke and I will get it."

"I need to help Sakura—"

"We'll both help Sakura," Naruto interrupted cheerfully. "It's not like baa-chan's in a hurry." To prove his point, he grabbed half of what Sasuke was carrying and chattered all the way, not allowing the two time to speak about the notes.

There. Problem solved.

When they finally arrived in the file room, the blond did what any good friend worried about his two in-denial friends would do in a situation like this – he subtly used chakra to break the bulbs and "accidentally" shoved Sasuke under the pretense of being startled. He heard rustling. Then, Sakura squeaking as she bumped into something.

Then, silence.

"I – thank you for catching me," she said.

"Hn," he grunted.

Translation: no problem.

Naruto grinned in the dark.

. . .

"That was a brilliant move, but still not good enough," Ino scolded.

Naruto scoffed. "What's not good about it? I had to get them together and then drive them apart – the anticipation is going to kill them!"

"You could have locked them in the file room by themselves! That would have resulted in a hot make-out session—"

"They would have talked! You know how logical Sakura is."

Ino stopped talking at that, but continued grumbling. The Rookie Nine was gathered once more, this time at Ichiraku to try to talk about their plans in low voices. Neji was trying not to participate, but couldn't really protest out loud because Tenten…

Well, Tenten was scary when mad. And she really got mad when anyone contradicted her determination to infuse romance into her friends' lives.

Everyone started whispering ideas.

"Maybe we can have them send fruits to each other—" Shino suggested.

"That is so lame! How about candies and full meals?" Chouji said.

"How about condoms?" Kiba piped in, eyes twinkling.

Neji watched. Maybe he could contribute something without sounding lame.

"We should change the tone of the notes – so when they see each other once more, logic will be the last thing in their minds," he said calmly.

The whispering stopped as they all stared at him. It was the first time he ever suggested anything.

"That is…a brilliant idea," Ino replied, eyes widening in surprise. Then, mischief. "Thinking naughty, Naruto?"

Naruto's grin practically reached his ears. "Of course. Let's get it on."

"Let's plant the seeds of wonderful love and let the flowers—"

"Seriously, Lee. You're killing the perversion. Let's just get it on."

Shikamaru sighed.

Tenten beamed proudly at the Hyuuga boy.

Neji's head inwardly swelled.

. . .

One month of constant note passing from Sasuke gave Sakura the indication that he was really comfortable with her now and that their friendship had reached a level a step up from their previous hi's and hello's and simple, general how are you's. He never asked for her response and she never gave him any – but their relationship and interaction, despite not talking about the letters (it was like a silent agreement between them), had definitely improved. They talked now, about a lot of things. About their training, their team. About life. It was great to be his friend.

However, the night she received a new note from him, she wondered if friend was the proper description to where they were headed.

Sakura,

I want you. I can't stop thinking what it would feel like to touch you every time I'm near you. It's annoying and exhilarating.

-S

Her mouth went dry. The butterflies came.

. . .

Sasuke,

I dreamed of you last night. You were wearing sweatpants and I was wearing my nightshirt, but you tore it off me after a second or two. I was wearing nothing underneath, and you touched me. You touched me everywhere.

It would be best not to see each other for a while (maybe a week or two) until I can get rid of the images in my brain. They won't stop.

Please don't tell anyone. It's embarrassing enough as it is. Just pretend I never sent this, and never talk about this to anyone. Not even me. Please.

-S

His stomach clenched. Heat spread through his body.

. . .

Sakura,

I dreamed of you last night. You were wearing this lace thing that I couldn't understand and you slowly stripped in front of me. We did unspeakable things in bed, and out of it.

Let's not see each other for a while. It would be best. I might do things to you that a proper man wouldn't dare do. You don't deserve such thoughts.

-S

. . .

Sasuke,

You have long fingers. I keep fantasizing about them. It's humiliating.

-Staying away from you, S

. . .

Sakura,

I saw you with Kiba today. He was flirting with you and you were smiling back at him. All the while, I kept seeing my hands peeling your clothes off and taking you on the nearest surface.

I still need to avoid you. Your mouth makes me hard. Seeing you makes me hard.

It's annoying. You're not.

-S

. . .

Sasuke,

I almost touched myself today while imagining you.

I wanted to imagine it was you touching me.

-S

. . .

Sakura,

Meet me in my house tonight. It's important.

-S

. . .

Sasuke,

I need to come over to your house tonight. Please be there. It's important.

-S

. . .

After nearly a month of avoidance, Sakura arrived at Sasuke's doorstep at exactly eight in the evening, bringing with her a basket of fruits and trying to steady her nerves by gripping the handle with all her might.

The moment he opened the door, she tried to smile. The butterflies in her stomach had taken up permanent residence, seeming to get stronger just at the sight of him.

"Hi," she said, holding out the basket.

"Hn," he replied, taking it. He motioned for her to come in, and she did, knees slightly shaking and trying to get a grip of herself (and really, trying to get rid of the images bombarding her at the thought of the notes). Once he closed the door with a very quiet click, she turned around to talk to him and get this tension over with.

Piece of cake, really.

She could totally handle this.

"I know that—"

"I think that—" he said at the same time.

Her arm brushed his by accident and there was a flash of indescribable heat, followed by a growl. Then all logic thoughts flew out of her head and zoomed straight out the window as he dropped the basket on the floor and they jumped each other like crazy, crazy animals.

Well, she jumped. He carried her like she weighed nothing and pinned her to the wall before pressing himself against her.

Her system went into overdrive.

"This is totally inappropria—" Sakura managed to say in a breathless whisper before he cut her off with his mouth and began to slowly, slowly seduce her. He rained kisses all over her as if she was a particularly tasty treat and he was addicted.

She moaned and let her fingers roam, gripping his hair and pulling him closer. All she could remember through the haze of lust and scorching burst of fireworks was that he tasted like the darkest chocolate she'd ever had, one that was completely forbidden and wonderful and—

He began removing panties, and she remembered no more.

Except she did – and every detail seemed to be embedded permanently in her mind. He entered her there, right against the wall, and took her fast and mindless, making her scream out his name and try not to beg for more.

All the while, he never stopped kissing her.

The second time he took her was in the kitchen, when they were trying to scourge his fridge and counter for food. He had managed to have a glass of water and she had managed to take a bite out of a peeled banana when his eyes darkened and he was all over her again. There was an urgency to his movement this time, unlike the hurried touches from before – this time, it was the kind of urgency that rendered her speechless and unable to form coherent sentences, much less words. He took and he gave, every thrust sweet and intense and leaving her heart running a staccato beat that seemed to say Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke…

It was mind-blowing.

The third time, they slept on the floor with him still inside her. He murmured her name in his sleep and buried his face in her neck. She smiled.

The fourth time, they finally made it to his bed.

. . .

Hundreds of blocks away from the Uchiha compound, some very, very curious people gathered.

"I wonder if it worked."

"Hell, yeah, it worked! Those letters were straight out of porn – I'd be surprised if it didn't!"

"It wasn't porn, you dummy. It was a highly-recommended romance novel."

"Icha-Icha isn't a romance novel."

"…fine. Whatever. Their eyes speak their feelings. We just gave them a nudge in the right direction."

"You mean a shove."

"It doesn't matter. It's a happy ending for everyone involved!"

"Let's just hope they won't kill us when they find out."

. . .

The next day…

"Sasuke-kun?"

"Hn?"

"Thank you for your letters."

A long, long pause.

"…what letters?"

a/n: Thank you for reading.

ALSO. Pimping out some friends:

smos and Sakura's Unicorn. The former, my betareader, recently updated her wonderful multichaptered fic, Hooded Lies. IT'S AMAZING, YOU GUYS. The latter, in the meantime, just came out with a new fic that's apparently gonna be multichaptered, too. I JUST READ IT AND WOW. WOW.

Check them out. :)