Disenchanted
Bubbly cola was pouring out from the windows, door and even the chimney. It was an amazing sight. Princess Nami had found a safe and dry place to stand and watched the cola flow unabated. She wondered how much cola there was.
To her surprise, Frankystiltskin floated through an open window, riding in a little cooking pot. A little wet, his hair was flat and hung over his face. He seemed very displeased. He paddled to where she was using a wooden laden. "This is a fine mess, girly," he mumbled.
How did he see... That was right. Frankystiltskin was magical so he could see through the invisible cape. She took it off and put it away. She didn't need it anymore. "At least you're all right."
"No thanks to you." He grunted and pulled out a comb to fix his hair.
"I tried to rescue you," Princess Nami protested. If this was gratitude, she should have let the bears eat him.
"And how did I end up here in the first place?"
She paused and squirmed under his gaze. "I might have accidentally dropped your bottle somewhere."
"Uh-huh."
"It could have happened to anyone."
"Sure."
To change the topic, she asked, "How long is this going to last? The cola is rising fast."
Frankystiltskin shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know. Forever?"
"What?!" Princess Nami grabbed Frankystiltskin by the collar of his shirt and lifted him out of the cooking pot. "Can't you turn it off? The whole place is flooding."
"Hey! Hey! Be careful with the clothes." He struggled until she set him down on the stone fence. "If the cap is back on, it should seal the bottle."
"Really?" Then she looked back at the cottage. Half of it was already submerged and the cola wasn't slowing down. "How are we suppose to do that?"
Again Frankystiltskin shrugged his shoulders. "But maybe we should find higher ground first." He indicated to their feet.
Princess Nami gasped audibly. So absorbed by the flooding cola, she didn't realize the trouble they were in. The level of the cola had reached her ankles and they were surrounded. They would have to swim, but she didn't know where to go.
"Oh dear. This is a problem," a feminine voice spoke. "Everyone in this land will drown if this continues."
"Good Witch Robin!" Princess Nami cried.
Seated very comfortably on a lounge chair underneath a sun parasol, Witch Robin put down her book and sat up. Her boat was a large buttercup flower. The shiny bright yellow petals had no problem keeping her afloat. Her flower boat drifted near them and they quickly hopped aboard.
"What are we going to do?" A strong wave rocked the buttercup boat and Princess Nami nearly lost her balance. Luckily Frankystiltskin caught her before she fell. The little guy was stronger than he looked. The situation was getting extreme. The carbonation from the cola was creating unpredictable currents.
"It appears we need to halt the source." Witch Robin sprouted her magical arms and hands and they paddled her boat away to a calmer area.
Princess Nami sat down and held onto one of the petals. "By capping the bottle again," she spoke as she gritted her teeth. "We figure that out, but how?"
"It's you!" Wizard Usopp wailed. He was panting heavily as he biked his way on a tricycle. The tricycle was outfitted with a pair of skis so it glided on the cola. It looked very rudimentary. Wizard Usopp was pedaling wildly but moved at a slow snail pace. Dragging behind him was Huntsman Zoro in the giant bug cage.
"Oh, hi there. How are you doing? Nice weather we're having," Princess Nami bumbled nervously.
He parked his tricycle next to the flower boat and jumped off, wagging his finger at her. "This is all your fault, isn't it!"
"No, no, no! I was...I was mugged." It was almost true. "Anyways, why did you bring the huntsman with you?"
Wizard Usopp narrowed his eyes and sneered, "I couldn't leave him home alone. Something might happen to him. Unlike other people, I'm a responsible good wizard."
Huntsman Zoro harrumphed and shook his head.
Suddenly there was a loud geyser of cola and something burst to the surface. The three bears appeared, drenched and frightened. They were on a sofa couch, clutching the upholstery. Luffy Bear held a drinking straw and was slurping the cola from where he lied.
"Oi!" Chopper Bear yelled, waving frantically. "Help! Help!"
A giant duck swam towards them. Yes, a giant duck. Princess Nami rubbed her eyes and looked again. It was a giant yellow duck wearing a blue knitted cap. Where did it come from?
The three bears were jumping up and down and calling to it.
"Hurry! He's still down there. Help him!" Brook Bear cried. He pointed down beneath the surface of the cola. The duck circled the spot where Brook Bear pointed and then dove down.
Princess Nami watched, feeling very anxious. She couldn't tell what was happening. It was hard to see anything in the dark bubbly cola.
Quiet and a little confused, everyone stared at the spot where the duck disappeared. Minutes went by with nothing. Then the duck popped back up to the surface and shook itself. In its bill was a limp mass of black, a man with yellow hair. The duck swam over to sofa where the three bears pulled him up.
"We should address our concern on the immediate problem," Witch Robin interrupted. She was right. The cola was turning the area into a lake now. "Good Wizard Usopp, if we combine our powers we should be able hold back the cola long enough for Princess Nami and Frankystiltskin to cap the soda bottle."
Wizard Usopp slumped. "That's hard to do," he moaned.
"Simply follow my lead." Witch Robin stood behind Wizard Usopp and held his hands out and started flapping his arms. Up and down they moved their arms like they were trying to fly.
Alarmed, Princess Nami protested, "Wait a second. You want us to go and cap the bottle?"
Very slowly the cola was blow back. It wasn't long before the cola parted and a path was formed. The path ran from the flower boat all the way to the three bears' cottage.
"Hurry. The cola continues to flow. This is our only chance."
"Let's go," Frankystiltskin hollered. He climbed off the boat and jogged down the path.
Princess Nami stood dumbfounded.
"Oi," Huntsman Zoro called. She turned and caught a little bag he threw to her. "Take these. They might come in handy."
She opened the bag and peered inside. "Bottle caps?"
"They're from beer bottles. I like to collect them," Huntsman Zoro explained simply.
"Thanks," she mumbled. She chased after Frankystiltskin.
It was intimidating travelling down the path. On both side of the path was a wall of cola that bubbled and swirled. She neared the cottage and saw it in disarray. Cola continued to spill out from the windows and door.
Inside Frankystiltskin was doing his magic. He was controlling the flow the best he could. At least that what she thought. It looked like he was drinking the cola. It was amazing seeing a tiny man drinking so much soda. It streamed into his mouth and disappeared. He waved at her and pointed to the bottle. It was standing upright in the middle of the kitchen.
Princess Nami rushed over to the bottle and went through the bag Huntsman Zoro gave. There were a lot of bottle caps of different colors and sizes. She picked one out and placed it on bottle, but it shot off the soda bottle. She cried and stepped back. She tried another cap with the same result. Was she doing it wrong? She didn't have this much trouble before.
One cap after another, none of them fit. Things were getting desperate. Princess Nami was running out of bottle caps. She was down to her last cap. If it didn't work they needed to escape. She closed her eyes, prayed, and slapped the last cap on the bottle.
Like all harrowing situations, success was on the last attempt and the bottle was sealed.
Her knees gave away and Princess Nami collapsed on the floor.
Frankystiltskin let out a long loud belch. "Excuse me." He patted his chest.
Of course there was still the matter of the wall of cola that Witch Robin and Wizard Usopp were holding back. Frankystiltskin couldn't do anything about it. He couldn't drink anymore. Actually, at the moment he was sick of cola. Instead, they rushed out of the cottage and returned to the buttercup boat.
It was a good thing they did. Wizard Usopp was exhausted from the constant flapping and he passed out with dizzy swirls in his eyes. Cottage was submerged in cola again, but at least it wasn't going to flood the entire land.
Witch Robin moved the boat to higher ground and Princess Nami jumped off followed by Frankystiltskin. Witch Robin stayed to tend to Wizard Usopp. Apparently it took a lot of magic power to hold back the cola.
"Do you think the cola will eventually drain off?" Princess Nami asked Frankystiltskin. Even though everyone was safe, the bears were effectively homeless. She felt a little bad. It was not like she dislike them or anything. They seemed like nice bears. She wondered if the bears had home insurance. She wondered if cola flooding was covered under nature disaster.
Instead of getting an answer from Frankystiltskin, she heard wailing.
The three bears had managed to navigate their sofa not far from them. The giant duck gave the sofa one good shove and it hit land. They carried the man off the sofa and dragged him onto a tuft of grass. The littlest bear was nudging the man. He listened to his chest and then rolled him over to his side. He didn't respond.
The bears cried.
"He's dead!" Brook Bear whimpered.
"No! Someone help him!"
Frankystiltskin jogged over to the man and checked on him. His wet floppy hair covered half his face and he looked lifeless. Strangely enough he still had a bent cigarette clenched in his mouth.
"Do you know CPR?" Princess Nami asked panicky. The situation had turned from bad to good and then back to bad again in a blink of an eye. It was stressful.
"Nah, he's breathing. He's cursed though."
"Cursed?" That didn't sound good either.
"Actually more like disenchanted," Frankystiltskin corrected himself. "The dude who cast it wasn't that good. He must have missed a few of the annual magic conferences."
"Oh," Princess Nami murmured. Like that made any sense.
"What are we going to do?" Chopper Bear sniffed. "He's not waking up."
"Who's going to make dinner now?"
It was at that inopportune moment the duck wandered in and gently nudged the man on the cheek. It let out a sad quack at the poor stranger. The bears quickly lost interest in their fallen companion. Their gaze fixated on the giant duck. Eyes sparkling and mouths drooling, even Princess Nami noticed the sudden shift of the mood. It was scary.
"Let's eat the duck!"
The duck ran. The bears ran after the duck. Princess Nami stood flabbergasted.
"Too bad for the duck." Frankystiltskin folded his arms and shook his head. "Such a waste too. It's an endangered species, a super rare variety of spot-billed ducks. The kind that lay golden eggs."
That got Princess Nami's attention in a snap. "Excuse me. You said golden eggs?"
He nodded.
"Why are you standing there? Do something! You have to save that duck." She lifted him off his feet for the second time that day.
"Hey, hey, hey. Watch the material. What am I suppose to do? The bears are hungry. They got to eat."
Eat? That was right. That man was suppose to make dinner for them. She threw Frankystiltskin aside and sprinted to him. She gripped his coat and started shaking him violently. "Wake up! Wake up!"
Rubbing the bump on his head, Frankystiltskin reprimanded her, "That's not going to do any good. I told you he's disenchanted. He's out cold."
"There's got to be a way to wake him up."
"Well..." Frankystiltskin began.
After a brief explanation, Princess Nami exclaimed in flat disbelief, "I have to KISS him? You're kidding?"
He shook his head.
She stared down and made a sour face. It was not like the man was hideous or anything. She simply didn't know him. Maybe if he wasn't drenched in cola, she would have a better impression of him. "It's your idea. You kiss him," she shot back at Frankystiltskin.
"I'm not a princess!"
Princess Nami rolled her head to the side and groaned. That again. If it wasn't someone trying to kill her or marry her, now she was stuck having to kiss random strangers. It sucked being a princess.
She exhaled a deep sigh. "Turn around then," she ordered.
"Why?"
"This is embarrassing enough as it is. I don't want you to look."
"Fine." He complied.
Bracing herself, she bent and pressed her lips against the back of his hand.
"That's not going to work!" Frankystiltskin yelled.
She jumped and snapped at him. "I told you not to look!"
"It's lips to lips. Not hand, not forehead, not cheek. LIPS!"
"Why should that make any difference? It's still a kiss."
"Look, I didn't write the rules. It's how it is. Quit stalling. The bears almost caught up to the duck."
Horrified, Princess Nami saw that Luffy Bear was on the duck's back and gnawing on the duck's hat. The other two bears were close behind. She was wasting time. Do for the duck that lays golden eggs, she told herself. Save the duck.
This time for real, she bent down, pulled out his cigarette and kissed him on the lips.
For a moment there was only the kiss, which wasn't as bad as she thought, but then a small applause interrupted it all.
Princess Nami jerked upright and saw Witch Robin and Wizard Usopp clapping. Back on his tricycle, Wizard Usopp had Huntsman Zoro in tow. He, of course, was napping again. Frankystiltskin gave her the thumbs up. Even the three bears, who were moments ago chasing the duck, were watching with a child-like fascination on their faces.
She wanted to smack everyone. When did they suddenly show up? But she didn't have time to vent her anger because the unconscious man began to stir. Princess Nami moved back and eyed him warily. His eyes blinked several times before he sat up. The bears cheered and gave him big hug.
Confused, he looked around. His eyes widened when he saw her. Before anyone knew it, he flew to her and dropped down to one knee. He held her hand and started singing about his eternal and everlasting love. It would have been sort of romantic if his nose wasn't bleeding profusely.
Prince Sanji, as he was introduced, continued his poetic declaration of love until Princess Nami suggested they go on a date first.
Despite the joyous moment, the day ended on a bitter note for Princess Nami. Carue, the duck that she wanted to save so desperately, turned out to be a boy-duck! So no golden eggs for her.
The three bears, having lost their home, went to live with Wizard Usopp. Of course Prince Sanji went with them. This made living with Wizard Usopp impossible so Princess Nami moved in with Witch Robin. This was both good and bad for Wizard Usopp. He couldn't decide which.
Princess Nami wrote a letter to Queen Kureha and asked her to rescind her order to kill her, which she did. This left Huntsman Zoro without any work until Witch Robin hired him. He got her all the body parts she ever needed and more.
Every so often Frankystiltskin would go skinny-dipping at Cola Lake, looking for his lost soda bottle. He was quite attached to his home so he never gave up hope. Travelers learned to avoid Cola Lake for this reason.
With Prince Sanji's help, Wizard Usopp continued his dream of Candyland. It wasn't easy because the three bears ate a lot of the sweets and pantries that Prince Sanji made.
On one of her many deliveries, Princess Nami saw the problems the bears were creating and came up with an ingenious solution. Her hobby being map drawing, she took a preliminary map of Candyland and turned it into a board game. That board game kept the bears entertained for hours every day. From there, she sold her board game to a toy company, called Hasbro and made millions off the royalty. Witch Robin's prediction came true.
And so the day came, they went on their first date. It was really unavoidable. There was only so many times Princess Nami could tell Prince Sanji she needed to wash her hair. Of all the places they could have gone, he took her to Disneyland. Was it the happiest or the most magical place on earth, Princess Nami didn't know. But it was certainly the most expensive place she had ever been to.
In the end, everyone lived happily ever after.
The End