I'm still around, even though two months late. Thank you for all your lovely reviews, but without further ado I present...

Remembering

Song Played: Zephyrus by The Bloc Party

Chapter 12: What am I to You?

The drive and walk to Wayne's house was a silent trip. A very awkward one at that. In Merlin's opinion at least. Morgana hadn't replied to his earlier question back in her apartment and to be honest with himself he was a little afraid of what the answer would be. Nevertheless, he kept his mouth shut in hope that she would eventually open up to him.

Morgana on the other hand had a series of thoughts streamlining through her head and had no idea how to tackle them. What was at the forefront of her mind was probably the most complicated one to deal with. Should she tell Merlin about their relationship? It might not even be counted as their relationship since he obviously was clueless about it. But just as she began to process possible outcome Morgana was quickly brought back to reality.

"Hey Hottie! Any more of those legs of yours getting around?" somebody yelled out.

Morgana and Merlin turned to where the voice came from and realised it was from a drunken youth screaming out from their front garden. But the particular youth was quickly silenced by his peers and what appeared to be a paramedic since there was an ambulance in the driveway of that house too.

Wayne's house is situated in a pretty suburban yet upper class neighbourhood. And on this particular Halloween night for some bizarre reason a good portion of the houses were holding parties of one sort or another. Also, a good chunk of those seemed to be under age teen parties with no supervision leading to the beautiful abuse (Wayne's words to quote) of alcohol and the outrageous antics of out of control pubescent children.

Morgana decided to ignore the comment and snub them off, even though inside she was itching to curse the boy. But as a mature and responsible adult, she acted appropriately and also partially she didn't want to bitch around this Merlin-returned person next to her, whom she could feel his eyes bore into her side, waiting for some form of action. In which he would be sadly disappointed for the lack thereof.

However, the two witnessed another paramedic treat another teenage boy. He seemed unconscious, possibly passed out or something similar. The sad yet almost amusing thing was that whilst most people who were watching seemed concerned but party-goers who were surrounding the paramedic and the unconscious emo-looking kid had their phones up recording it. The footage probably within a matter of minutes would make its way on Youtube or Facebook.

"Stupid kids," Morgana muttered.

Merlin shrugged, slightly bewildered that this would be a beginning of a conversation. "We were all young once. But I clearly don't remember being so drunk that I passed out."

"Well, I'm positively sure that you weren't drunk at the age of seventeen since you were living in that backwater town you call Ealdor. But tonight you may have to watch out since Wayne would be trying to shove every alcoholic beverage down your throat in attempt to get you drunk."

Merlin grinned, "He wishes. The only person who managed to ever do that was Gwaine, if you remember him."

Morgana internally grimaced. She sure did remember Sir Gwaine; a very thick-headed, charming (in his own obscure, ruffian way) and steadfast loyal knight to Arthur. She clearly remembered making him fight for food until breaking point in her second attempt for Camelot. What was she going to do when they actually arrived at Wayne's house?

"Ummm about that, you know Wayne is-"

"Emrys! Morgana!" somebody called from a few houses away.

The call was from Wayne naturally who was having a few drinks at the front of his house and was making his way toward them. Who else would've have spotted a vampire and burlesque dancer from fifty metres away and recognise it was their friends?

"Hey Wayne!" replied Morgana cheerfully (as she can be before being interrupted in such a delicate conversation). She walked towards Wayne until she realised that Merlin hadn't moved an inch from where they were before. Morgana quickly back tracked to the vampire.

Merlin was frozen on the spot. His apparent friend Wayne looked exactly like Gwaine. It was surreal. The last time he saw the knight, was actually at the tavern, the Rising Sun specifically. He, was cheerful and blissfully drunk as per usual exclaiming to all his friends about how such a good friend Merlin was much to his embarrassment. That was actually the last time Merlin saw Gwaine alive. Gwaine however, was part of Arthur's battalion when they were ambushed at Camlann. What happened afterwards was history. Or so Merlin thought.

He grabbed Morgana's wrist and pulled her close to him.

"Why is Gwaine there?" he hissed.

"Don't you remember? All those memories of friends who are friends?"

"Well I didn't know their names," Merlin retorted, "Plus it was all so vague. I saw people who looked like the knights but it was so obscure and unreal."

"I know, I know," she exasperated.

"Any more surprises I should know about before I make a fool of myself? He called me Emrys!"

Not that you need to try to be a fool, since you're always the fool thought Morgana. She also noted that the steadfast, almost brutal honesty was somewhat Sioraí like.

"Only your close friends call you Emrys," Morgana replied, recalling a particular long gone conversation they once had. "Also umm there was something going between us," she mumbled.

Merlin looked confused, "Huh?"

By that stage Wayne had made it to them. "Hey what are you two lovebirds conspiring here?" he asked and laughed jovially at his own jest.

Merlin's eyes widened at the not so funny joke that Gwaine or Wayne made.

Morgana though reacted differently and grabbed Merlin's hand, entwining her delicate fingers with his long, elegant ones. She smiled sweetly Wayne, ignoring Merlin's reaction as much as she could. "Ohh ways to avoid your ludicrous drinking games."

Wayne chuckled, "Ohh you wish, you wish. You Morgana maybe, but your pretty, little boyfriend here instead," he wrapped his arm around Merlin's shoulder from his free side, leading them to the party, "Would have a more trickier time. I plan to get you drunk the good old fashion Irish way."

Merlin's eyes widened even more at the more accentually uncomfortable jest. Also Morgana was holding his hand and he just couldn't reason with himself to untangle his fingers from hers. Wayne though interpreted his expression with glee, believing it to me one of worry for the mischief foretold.

"Not too worry Emrys, Morgana would save you from making an idiot out of yourself right?," he grinned.

"Yeah try not to get to drunk!" called out a dark skinned man from the porch as soon the trio unlocked the front gate.

"We don't want you passing out like those idiotic kids from down the street," continued a giant of a man as he and the dark skinned man watched the another ambulance rush by.

"Of course not," replied Morgana, "Cause I'm here." She rushed to give the two a hug. "Hi Elliot. Hi Pierre."

Once again, Merlin was overwhelmed by the presence of the two men, Elyan and Percival. Though they apparently went by another name and clearly, like Wayne did not know of the past when then greeted him as Emrys (usually they'll call him Merlin) and with a man hug (that's what he called them at least).

"Hmm interesting costumes Elliot, you couldn't even bother? But Pierre I do like the Frankenstein look," commented Morgana inquisitively.

Merlin gave his friends a once over. Incredulously realising that they were outrageously dressed as he was too. Elliot wore baggy clothes with massive rings on his knuckles and a heavy chain necklace whilst Pierre had tattered clothes, some face paint and what appeared to be a bolt through his head.

"Hey! I'm actually Mr. T thank you very much," retorted Elliot.

"Don't worry I didn't recognise who he was either, but I'm actually Frankenstein's Creature if you didn't know that Frankenstein was the name of the scientist who created him," said Pierre in a very intellectual manner, contrasting with his bizarre look and giant of a man.

"Yeah, yeah. But what about me? Can you guess who I am?" Jumped out Wayne with his arms waving wildly about before conjuring a bow and arrow apparently out of no where.

Morgana and Merlin stared hard at the man. He was wearing green tights with a green tunic, a cap with a feather attached and wrapped around his waist was a leather belt with a dagger.

"It's really ambiguous," whispered Elliot to Morgana.

"Oi!" called out Wayne before he strikes out another pose for the clueless duet.

"Peter Pan?" guessed Morgana with a quizzical expression.

Wayne looked horrified at her answer and then focuses on Merlin, the warlock grimaces internally.

"What about you Emrys? What's your guess?"

Merlin eyed him up and down, trying to re-analyse the ubiquitous costume. Honestly he had no clue.

"Legolas?" he grinned weakly.

"Of course not Emrys! I can't believe that neither you nor Morgana could see who I am. I'm Robin Hood! Who steals from the rich and gives to the poor," he announced jovially even though he was disappointed that neither of his friends could tell who he was. "Anyway, we should get moving, I'm pretty sure pretty boy is eager to see you two, and Jen as well."

Wayne and the duo pushed past Elliot and Pierre and into the luxurious house. The two of them gave each other a knowing look, quite amused by the host's antics before the both of them were handed a glass of some unknown alcoholic beverage by Wayne.

"Here drink up you two, this party is finally gets to start with you guys around," he cheered before staring the two down, pressuring them to drink from their glasses.

Morgana quickly swallowed a few gulps of the drink, quite use to the bitter taste. But Merlin on the other hand looked into his glass filled with a foreign amber liquid he did not know. It smelled nothing like ale, mead or wine. Just a sharp, tangy-ness floated around it.

"C'mon Emrys just down it," encouraged Wayne.

"Don't pressure Sioraí into drinking that crap Wayne," called out a feminine voice.

Luckily for Merlin Jen dressed as an angel had just arrived into the room to save him from downing a rather horrid drink. He looked at her with a grateful expression, no longer shocked that Jen was Gwen. He sort of expected this.

Even with this Merlin was still not able to reign in the shock and surprise that flooded him when he saw Arthur waltzing into the room with a two glasses of punch and dresses up as a knight, of course.

"What's wrong with you Emrys? You look like you've seen a ghost," stated Arthur who wore a curious expression.

Merlin indeed looked pale as a ghost. Look at his once best friend still alive and breathing was just a miracle him. He opened his mouth to say something but there were no words he could convey to fill the void. His mind was blank, what does one actually say to a friend they thought were dead for centuries?

However, if Merlin did manage to enunciate something it was quickly prevented when Wayne interrupted him and pinch Merlin's nose, forcing his mouth to open to down the whole glass of whisky. Merlin swallowed it all up before coughing, the sharp taste stinging his taste buds.

"Time to get this party started now that Emrys has taken his first drink!" he announces to the rest of the crowd before disappearing to get another drink.

The other party goers cheer, raising the cups and bottles before resuming their activities. Merlin is left befuddled with Morgana and Arthur laugh at his expression, but Jen frowns at Wayne's antics.

Arthur is quickly distracted by Jen's frown."Yes, I think this party really needs to become a party. Would you like to dance Jennifer?" asks Arthur in his most polite and charming way to his date.

Jen looks at Merlin in a weird way, in which interprets as 'help me' but Arthur wraps an arm around her delicate waist and leads her to the impromptu dance floor in Wayne's living room.

"Yeah those two aren't officially together yet. You think their apparently destined love will defeat the threads of fate and unite the two again in a not so royal relationship," comments Morgana

Merlin says nothing and watches Jen and Arthur dance on the floor, even if wasn't what he really calls dancing but more like moving random limbs into some semblance of a pattern.

Morgana ignores his silence and continues, "But I suppose destiny had its hand though, with the lot of us at the same time in one place. Funny how you and Arthur are still two sides of the same coin. You're still friends with the once king."

"But where does that leave you Morgana? What am I to you in this renewed world?" he breaks his gaze from the dancing couple to look at the raven haired woman beside him. His sapphire meeting emerald.

She looks away and then hesitantly whispers, "I don't know anymore." Before walking away from him into the kitchen, disappearing and leaving him alone in this strange place.

"Woman problems aye Emrys?" Wayne mysteriously appears at his side again with two bottles of beer.

"Huh?"

"Girlfriend troubles right? You two been fighting or something?" he raises an eyebrow.

"Morgana and I..." Merlin is dazed at Wayne's suggestion. Him and Morgana?

"C'mon you can tell me. We're like best friends, even though Arthur's really your best friend but he ain't good with these D and M conversations."

Wayne leads Merlin to the upstairs of the apartment and to the balcony. They could see the rest of the party in the backyard and the array of costumes people dressed in. Merlin realises that Wayne is really similar to Gwaine and wonders if he can reveal his memories too. Like what Morgana did to him or something. But his thoughts are quickly interrupted.

"So what's up with you and Morgana tonight? You two have been acting strange," he says, leaning against the rail. He passes Merlin a bottle of beer before taking a gulp from his own.

Merlin nods in thanks but doesn't drink from it, instead he copies Wayne's motion and leans on the rail too. "Strange? What do you mean by strange?"

"Usually you two are all over each other. Like how it's been over the past months. It was pretty disgusting at first really but it was great to see you happy mate." He pats Merlin on the back.

Merlin remains silent.

"So no break up happening soon right?"

"No – we're alright. Same as usual," he replies, his mind is trying to process everything and the conclusion he is coming to is bewildering. He doesn't know if he truly believes his own deduction.

"Cool, I don't want to see you like how you were when she passed a few years ago. You and Morgana, I can see are good for each other. I see you guys really do love each other. And hey speak of the devil, the seductress has appeared."

Merlin's eyes widen to the size of plates. It was true, him and Morgana are courting or was it called dating now. And here she comes in that revealing costume of hers. Wayne goes downstairs, leaving them two alone at the balcony. He remembers the bottle in his hand and sculls the whole thing down.

"Hey Merlin, careful there," she warns meekly. Morgana doesn't understand why she needs to find Merlin, her feet lead her here. She's too scared to tell him the truth.

He ignores her warning and finishes the beer. "Sooo..." he wants her to have a proper conversation with her.

Strangely, the strong willed woman that usually oozes with confidence and sophistication doesn't reply and looks at her feet, fidgeting.

"Morgana look at me."

She doesn't. Morgana doesn't know what has come over her. When she first began this charade. It was meant to be a bit of fun, something to interest her life, a too long millennia plus life. Yet, she bit off more then she could chew, she got herself entangled in her own web, she was losing her own game. The unbelievable thing was that she didn't feel like it was an entirely bad thing. Actually it was quite the opposite, but she is Morgana Pendragon. Her pride does not falter. Yet, it seems so fragile when she is with him now. Like it was a remnant, a fragment of a what a could have been.

"Morgana look at me please." She continues to refuse his request.

Something clutches at his insides, Merlin can't tell. He thinks he knows the truth but he rather hear it from her. He takes a step towards her and with a quivering hand he tips her head so she faces him, looking directly at him. Her green eyes seem to bare everything and nothing at him.

"Morgana, what am I to you?" he asks softly.

She looks into his aure eyes, they were hypnotic and she was unable to tear her gaze away from him. She opens her mouth to reply but no sound comes out. Morgana can feel tears welling up in her eyes, from an emotion she can't define.

"Do you love me?" Merlin is blunt and to the point. The Sioraí trait which remained with him after remembering.

Morgana breaks down at this point, the tears finally escape her eyes. "I don't know!" she cries out, "I don't want to love you after all we've been through. But there is something there I can't ignore."

Merlin is flustered he doesn't know how to react to her crying. He hates seeing girls crying. He hates seeing Morgana cry. In a way he knows that he shouldn't care but he feels guilty. If only...if only he told her the truth...

"What did you do to me Merlin?" she demands. "I didn't plan for this to happen."

"Plan for what to happen?" he cups her face delicately with his large hands.

"To fall in love with you!" she removes herself from him. "It was all fun and games and then something happened. You did something to me didn't you? Your magic reacted instinctively or something bizarre like that!"

Merlin stares at Morgana spouting her true thoughts, what she really feels. The honesty and passion she had before he poisoned her. Before he killed her. Then he suddenly he pulls her closer to him and presses his lips onto hers. It wasn't soft and sweet but fierce and passionate. Morgana gasps at the contact but eventually she retaliates, her silky lips pull at his mouth, hungrily reaching for more. More of this forbidden treasure. Her hands run up his back between his clothes and cape, clawing at his body, pulling him closer. Merlin's arms wrap around her dainty waist and pulls her closer to him, slanting his mouth for a perfect fit with hers.

"What- are you doing- to me- Merlin?" she pants into his mouth before separating their lips.

However, Merlin doesn't answer and simply recaptures her lips, the renewed contact wasn't like the desperate kiss from before, but something different. It was something only they could feel but not describe.

Merlin was the one to break the second kiss. He takes a step back and looks at Morgana. Truly looks at her, ignoring their past and to see the woman in front of him. She was like a storm, terrifying yet captivating. Her lips were swollen to the colour of raspberries and her hair tangled like a raging river.

"What are you doing to me?" he asks her, "You have been the one who has tried to kill everyone I loved and destroy everything I believe in," he pauses, "But I can't feel it in myself to hate you."

Morgana looks at Merlin. She thinks their isn't an ounce of Sioraí left any more. He was replaced with something more profound. She can't tell if it is for better or for worst. "I think that is something I always knew."

Merlin doesn't respond to the statement. "Where does it leave us now?" he asks quietly.

"I don't know."

"Is that really all you have to say?"

She's confused. Usually Morgana has an opinion for everything but here what she wants to say doesn't seem to be the right thing to say.

Merlin senses her hesitance, "If you want to say something you should say it now. I've already forgiven you – I think."

Morgana bites her bottom lip, blood rushes up to the skin reddening more than what seems possible. "Could we...forget about the past ...and let it be just us two?... We can start again," she says breathlessly.

Merlin furrows his brow in thought, "But what about the others?" referring to the friends who look like his king, his queen and the knights. He has considered reawakening their memories too.

She winces at her thought, feeling selfish, "Our destiny is over Merlin. There is no Camelot, no Albion to reunite any more. It would be better if we left them in ignorance, so they don't have to suffer what we have gone through." She looks to her feet again, fearing what he might say.

He quickly grasps the fact that it was a selfish request, yet it was true. He doesn't want Arthur, Jen and the others to remember the cruel lives that have passed, the mistakes made leading to devastating outcomes. The torments of the past. "We can turn over a new leaf then," he smiles slightly.

Morgana looks up, her green eyes glittering brightly. "Yeah, we can." Pinpricks are forming in the corner of her eyes. She bounds forward to Merlin wrapping her arms around his torso, embracing him so hard as to prove that he was real. Merlin lips are on her forehead, lightly pressing against her smooth skin, holding them there. They held each other there.

They hear footsteps coming from the stairs and they separate. It was Wayne.

"Was I interrupting something here?" he asks gently. Seeing that Morgana appeared teary and her lips swollen, and Merlin looking far more emotional than usual too.

"No, no," replies Morgana, wiping away her tears, trying not to smudge her make up.

"Ok, just came to tell you guys cake has been cut up," he grins before leaving.

"Sure we'll be down in a moment," Merlin calls after him before he wraps a possessive arm around Morgana and leads them downstairs. He thinks he can get used to this feeling that is building with in him – get used to having Morgana beside him.

The rest of the night was pretty much your usual party. Except for the fact that Morgana had to keep whispering Merlin all the references and updates the world has come to use. Eventually, they decided to go home. Arthur winking at Merlin and Wayne blatantly gives him the thumbs up when he and Morgana are about to leave. Merlin may have been bit unknowledgeable to various modern day things, memories still trying to sort themselves out in his head, but he clearly knew what both those gestures meant. He just shook his head in amusement, and ignored the duo.

Morgana on the other hand had other ideas, more cheeky and mischievous ones. She rather fuel their imaginations and she entwined her delicate fingers with Merlin's long, pale ones. She leads him out with a wave to the other people who were still partying and just catches Wayne's or maybe Gwaine's amused expression.

The couple found themselves walking in a comfortable silence. It wasn't like the awkward walk they had when they came to the party those many hours ago, but simply a good one. Morgana began to shiver, her revealing costume not providing much warmth. So Merlin did what any other gentlemen would do and took off his cape (his ridiculous vampire cape) and placed it around her bare shoulders, wrapping her with it.

Morgana felt the satiny material fall onto her shoulders, the heat from Merlin still upon it, warming her up.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome," he replies cordially.

They continue walking towards where she parked her car, most of the houses have now quieted down, the parties finishing. No more immature drunken teenagers with nothing to do screaming at her. It was four in the morning so it should be expected. Then Morgana feels a familiar slimy sensation, the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end.

Her stalker was nearby.

Morgana moves closer to Merlin, reconnecting their hands again. Merlin looks down at her, his eyes appear thoughtful but on edge at the same time.

"Did I tell you I have a stalker?" she mentions quietly.

"No, you haven't."

"Well it's a magical one too."

"Hmmm, have you confronted them?"

"No. I don't even know who they are. I think I can take them on easily. They appear to have the ability to possess or control others. But it's very weak. Magic doesn't come easily to people like they did in the old days."

"You have mentioned that. That's something I want to figure out." Merlin's posture changes subtly. Suddenly he takes on a predatory look, his eyes fizzle between gold and blue. This is the look of the powerful warlock Emrys. "And I assume your magical stalker is here now."

The slimy, magical sensation increases ten fold. To a stage where its beginning to become overbearing. It was a lot more different than the other times. "Yes," she whispers, Morgana realises that her stalker is more powerful than she predicted.

"Well it's time to meet them I guess," he states loudly and turns around.

"What?" Morgana is confused by his sudden decision but turns around see what he is facing.

Merlin ignores her question. "Mordred you can come out now," he calls out into the empty street.

After a second, a form comes out from behind a tree. It was the emo-looking teen from the out of control party earlier. He appeared seventeen years old. His hair was pitch black and gelled, and he wore dark clothes to match the look. But it was his eyes, those icy blue eyes that were not of a drunken, passed out teenager, but something more conniving, more manipulative – something that made Mordred the powerful leader of the grand armies that could take on the armies of Albion.

"Hello Emrys. Hello Morgana," Mordred greets, his smile flashing unnaturally bright.

Author's Notes

Not my best chapter, but I am on a roll by updating 3 stories in an exam period :D. So how many of you expected the return of Mordred? I'm really curious. Also anyone who would like to make a cover for this I would really appreciate. Might not update in 3 weeks though, going on a holiday to the Great Barrier Reef. Thanks for reading and please review.