Warnings: Swearing

An update!? What. I actually really love writing this story, not sure why but I love it. Maybe it's cause I love writing about bratty, pompous Sasuke, it's just so much fun.
I'm not abandoning anything I swear. Anyway enough talk! On with the story

"Garaa, save me!" Naruto whined.

The blond and red haired assassins were lounging about in one of the Uchiha's stables where they kept their most prized stallions. Bright rays of sunlight pierced through the cracks of the closed shutters, spaced at regular intervals around the stable. A constant and painful reminder for the blond that time was slowly running out before he had to deal with the Brat Prince and his oversized ego.

They're probably having breakfast right at this moment, Naruto thought with a growing sense of dread. The pathetic blond assassin was sprawled out amongst the bales of hay; there was hay in his hair, his clothes and probably his boots too, although he honestly couldn't care less right now. There were bigger problems then having to deal with an itchy ass later on…well…maybe not. He stood up and shook himself in an attempt to dislodge the hay stuffed in his clothes, almost falling back into the bale. He huffed, gave up and sat back down.

Gaara rolled his eyes at the comical sight Naruto made, he had opted for a seat on a wooden stool in a corner of the stable and was currently sharpening one of his silver daggers. The constant screech of metal on metal was a comfort to his ears and it was far better than having to listen to Naruto whine about the Uchiha's little brother.

"You think I could…" The blond began, running a tanned hand through his dishevelled mess of a hair. Bits of hay fell out.

"What?" Garaa quirked a non-existent eyebrow.

"Ahhh, I don't know!" Naruto wanted to yank his hair out in frustration. He wanted to drown himself in hay and hope Itachi would forget about everything. Fat chance of that happening, the bastard practically had photographic memory. Naruto could already picture him waltzing in here, eyes showing bloody murder as he dragged him off to the gates of hell to go 'play' with Lucifer himself.

A gorgeous chestnut colored stallion neighed, shaking its sleek mane from side to side, the horse gleamed a blazing red where the sun reflected off its coat. Naruto leaped off the bale and wandered over to the stallion opposite of where Garaa was seated. "Shhh, Kyuubi." He rubbed the horse's neck and the creature stilled for the span of a second before it nuzzled Naruto's hand. Naruto grinned.

"Wait, boy." He sprinted over to a patched canvas bag, hung up by a metal hook on the wall and withdrew a fresh and perfectly red apple. He offered it to his favourite mount and the horse neighed in delight before devouring the apple right from Naruto's fingers.

Garaa chuckled as he watched Naruto pet the horse. "You'll make him fat." He said which earned him a sharp glare from the blond and a snort from Kyuubi.

"He's perfectly fine, aren't you boy." Naruto cooed at the horse. Kyuubi snorted again and Naruto swore the horse had rolled its eyes. He huffed and stomped back over to his pile of hay.

Gaara rolled his eyes, this idiot could be such a child sometimes. "Naruto, just do it. I'm sure training Uchiha The Second isn't going to kill you."

Naruto turned to face Garaa, a look of utter disbelief plastered on his face. "Garaa, you do not understand. Itachi's brother is like Satan incarnate but a hundred times worse. No, he's a thousand times worse actually."

The red head scoffed. "Stop exaggerating, he can't be that bad and how would you know, you've never met the guy properly."

"I hear enough stories from Itachi and the servants and he is Satan's spawn I tell you."

"They're just stories, rumours."

"Sounds pretty accurate to me."

"You're being unreasonable."

"He called me Itachi's concubine."

Garaa paused. "Did he really?"

"YES!" Naruto was pacing from one end of the stable to the other now kicking up hay in the process; the stable boys won't be pleased. "Do I look like a concubine to you?" He held his arms out, blue eyes wide.

Gaara resumed sharpening his blade, "…no, of course not."

"YOU PAUSED YOU BASTARD!" Naruto pointed an accusing finger in Garaa's direction.

"I did not, you're delusional." Garaa stood up and made his way towards the exit, ignoring Naruto who was practically foaming at the mouth. When he arrived at the door he turned to face the raging baboon that had been his partner and best friend for all his life. "By the way…" Naruto stopped flailing about to look up at him. "You're late."

"You're evil."

"I know."

Sasuke scowled at the troops sparring it out in the middle of the training grounds. He's late. First day and he's late already. "Great first impression this is turning out to be," he murmured. Sasuke pondered on whether he should just up and leave but before he could decide, a hideous blond blur came sprinting towards him and would've crashed into him too if he hadn't sidestepped the monstrosity that was his 'trainer.' He scoffed. What was Itachi thinking.

Naruto tumbled headfirst into the tree Sasuke had previously been lounging against.
"Owww, shit that hurts." He rubbed his throbbing skull while the Uchiha stared on, completely impassive, uncaring and just a tad embarrassed he had to be standing next to this buffoon.

"If you're done playing the fool I'd like to begin now before winter arrives."

Naruto looked up, forehead creased and eyebrows scrunched together in a scowl. Selfish brat. He got up off the ground and turned around so he could take in the younger Uchiha and what he deduced was that mini Uchiha looked…plain. He couldn't see the handsome and sweet heir all the females drooled over but he now understood why Itachi had told him that he wasn't being punished in any way, because it sure as hell felt like he was being punished. He brushed dirt off his plain, cream coloured tunic and extended his hand out in greeting, clearing his throat as he spoke, "Um…uhh, my names Naruto, I'll be your teacher from now on."

The Uchiha looked at him, impassive. "Do I really need to introduce myself to you? We've wasted enough time as it is, let's go." He turned around and left Naruto standing there like an idiot with his hand still outstretched and walked to the middle of the training grounds. Many of the soldiers bowed to him and strode clear of the area, some retreated inside to break fast or bathe while others remained outside, curious. They formed groups around the arena, sitting on fences, stools or on the ground.

Naruto coughed, feeling awkward with all the attention on him. He made his way to Sasuke and addressed the Uchiha, far too self-conscious of all the eyes on them, judging, waiting, watching. Being the centre of attention was probably not the most comfortable situation for an assassin, too used to blending in to the night to be in but, Itachi's orders. Damnit Itachi, this is taking years off my life. Might as well get started.

"So let's start out with a sword first, I'll test how much you know and then we'll move on in whatever direction after that."

He caught the Uchiha smirking as he turned away from him. "You got a problem with that?" God the pissed him off.

Sasuke turned to face Naruto and cocked his head to the side, smirk still in place. "None whatsoever, although I should warn you I don't intend to go easy on you."

A soldier came and presented a polished, bronze broadsword to Sasuke. He picked it up, happy with the weight and took his place a few paces away from Naruto, ready, waiting and most obviously bored.

We'll see how good you really are, brat. Another soldier tossed him an identical sword. Naruto caught it in his right hand with ease. He never did like broadswords, they were too heavy and useless in narrow alleyways and they were also damn annoying to run through the streets with. He'd have much preferred a pair of short daggers like Gaara's or even a rapier, less weight meant more speed. He took two steps back and stood there, ready.

The soldiers all watched eager for the beating Sasuke would dish out. The younger prince was ruthless even in sparring matches. That skinny little blond's got no chance, most of them thought. He'll be up and packing after the prince was done with him.

Sasuke acted, quick as a cat, he dashed towards Naruto and swung the sword, intent on knocking the blond out with one swing. Too easy.

Too many openings. Naruto easily parried with his sword. God I hate this sword. Sasuke jumped back in surprise and took his stance. Not bored now are you, Naruto thought.

The soldiers grinned in rising excitement. Seems like this wouldn't be such a one-sided match after all.

Sasuke, cautious now, circled the blond with his sword poised to parry or lunge should the opportunity arise.

The kid learns pretty fast. Naruto watched Sasuke, drew in a quick breath and lunged. Bronze on bronze scrapped against each other as he parried, feinted and lunged at Sasuke. The blazing sun made the swords shimmer like fire. The Uchiha was sweating now.

Sasuke leapt back after another onslaught from Naruto and almost dropped to his knees from sheer exhaustion, he gasped for breath and cursed the bright summer heat. His legs felt like lead, sweat drenched his body and the sword seemed to weigh a ton.I'm not going to lose, I won't. Who does this idiot think he is? Another part of his mind wondered how the blond was so wouldn't believe Naruto wasn't exhausted too.

Naruto on the other hand was faring much better than Sasuke. He was barely tired. This spar was serving as more of a warm up to him than anything. The Uchiha was strong and fast he'd give him that but he was too impatient, left too many openings for Naruto to exploit. He was like a child swinging that sword around. He watched the Uchiha struggle for breath. He could see the sword trembling in his hands, the slight bend of his knees and the look in his eyes. It was a gaze Naruto knew all too well, had seen in so many men, men he had killed. It was a look of desperation. The uchiha was done.

Sasuke darted forwards. Idiot, Naruto thought. Never lunge at someone so far away and without the element of surprise, it's a death sentence.

Sasuke gripped the sword in both hands and swung it towards Naruto's left, victory clear in his eyes.

Naruto twisted clear away from the blade, his moves had been smooth and effortless like water. Sasuke stumbled to the ground, sword clattered away. He was breathing hard, eyes wide; there was dirt all over him. Naruto tapped his blade against the Uchiha's shoulder once, twice. "You lose Uchiha."

Sasuke's eyes were impossibly wide, he couldn't believe it. This stupid idiot. Itachi's dumb, pathetic concubine had just bested him in a duel, this wasn't happening. This was not happening. He raised his head to look up into the blond's impossibly clear, blue eyes. Who are you really, he thought. Sasuke wanted to know, had to know and he would find out.

Naruto shoved the blade into the dirt and extended his hand out. "Nice to meet you I'm your new instructor, names Naruto, yours?"

Sasuke looked at the outstretched hand like it was manure on the soles of his boots. He slapped it away and dragged himself up off the ground. A servant scampered to his side and offered a damp towel and a globet of water. Sasuke ignored the servant and turned around so his back was facing Naruto.

"Uchiha Sasuke. Next time, don't be late."

He took off without a backwards glance. The servant directed a venomous glare towards Naruto before tailing behind the Uchiha.

Naruto snorted, before muttering, "Even his servants are assholes."

He picked up the Uchiha's discarded sword, along with his own and made his way to the soldier's barracks.

Soldiers stepped out of his way, stunned speechless by how easily he'd defeated their master. A soldier turned to his companion, awestruck, "Where the hell'd he come from?"

"No bloody idea."

Itachi had seen the whole spectacle play out from his window. He chuckled, clearly amused. Someone had had to slap Sasuke awake sooner or later and what better person then his dear Naruto. His little brother wouldn't survive in this happy illusion of always being the best, there would always be someone better and his brother just had to accept that fact. He sighed and rubbed two fingers against his temple. Unfortunately for him, Sasuke wasn't that easy to convince and he wouldn't let this insult slide. Itachi felt sympathy for Naruto. Sasuke would not be kind to him in the following days to come. He'd make it up to his assassin later.

Naruto slid the blades into one of the many racks lining the walls of the soldier's barracks; he ran a hand along the hilt. Still hate them. He turned to leave and was faced with one of the ugliest human beings his eyes had ever had the misfortune to see. The soldier was huge with insanely broad shoulders, greasy black hair that hung in lanky strings all over his head and sweat. Everywhere. Would it kill the guy to bathe? Smells worse than the pig stys.

"Where'd ya learn ta fight, brat?" Lovely, missing teeth as well. Naruto heaved a tired sigh, he hated dealing with idiots.

"My dad. Now if you'll excuse me I have somewhere I need to be." Naruto tried to side step Sir Ugly and his band of men but the soldier grabbed his arm. Naruto's first thought was I need a bath, followed by, doesn't matter I'll burn just my arm off.

"Where ya think ya going, brat?" The man's breath was putrid and now Naruto would need to burn his retinas too, in fact that should've been his first idea. He was losing his touch.

"How about you kindly let go of my arm and we all walk out as friends." Don't do anything stupid, Naruto. Think of how pissed Itachi would be, you do not want to piss that guy off.

Sir Ugly laughed a booming, gruff laugh. "Don't think so brat, aye, why don'tcha try your hand against me or…" He pulled the blond up against his hairy chest and leaned in towards Naruto's ear. Note, burn that too. "How bout I get that pretty little mouth of yours to suck me and me boy's hard cocks aye." Naruto felt a large, callused hand squeeze his ass, followed by a chorus of laughter and shouts of agreement. Think of Itachi. Think of Itachi….Fuck Itachi.

Naruto wrenched the man's disgusting hand away from his ass and squeezed. The man howled in pain and used his free hand to make a grab at Naruto's neck. The assassin was too fast. Naruto let go of the arm and dodged left out of range of the man's outstretched hands. He grabbed a blade from the rack behind him. Longsword. I'm just full of luck today aren't I. He stayed where he was, waiting.

Sir Ugly's band of men seemed hesitant, very aware of the beating the blond had given to their prince just then. Fear won because they turned tail and ran out, other soldiers that had been standing around, curious, also started for the grounds outside, not wanting to be on the end of the Uchiha family's bad side. All that was left was Naruto and the ugly soldier standing across from him.

"You little shit, after I'm done with ya, I'll fuck ya dead body right in front of the Uchiha's."

Naruto rolled his eyes, he'd had far uglier threats.

The man lunged straight for him. Seriously? What was up with this army and head on assaults. Naruto sidestepped the charging bull of a man and aimed a swift and hard kick to the man's groin. The bastard had it coming.

The man fell to the grounding moaning in agony, hand clutched over his burning dick.

"Next tim-"

"Uzumaki Naruto, Master Itachi would like to see you up in his chambers." Naruto turned to see a servant standing at the entrance.

"Can it wait, I'm kind of busy at the moment." Busy ripping this guy's balls out and shoving them up his ass.

"Master Itachi requests that you go now."

Naruto sighed. It wasn't even dusk yet and he was already having to deal with too much. "Fine, tell him I'm coming up now." He looked down at the soldier still groaning in pain. "I'll deal with you later," he smiled at the man who looked like he'd just shit his pants. "Don't miss me to much when I'm gone okay."

"Naruto." Itachi needed a break, preferably on a deserted island where no one could find him, with Naruto obviously. "Did you have to potentially disfigure one of my soldiers like that?"

"He groped my ass!" Now that was something Itachi hadn't heard. He'd deal with the soldier later, maybe have the guy castrated.

"You know you should've just walked away. You can't let it be known that you are what you are." Naruto huffed from his spot on Itachi's bed. Itachi couldn't help but adore the sight, how he craved to just take the blond here and now. He had a feeling Naruto would be loud and relished at the thought of wrenching sweet screams of "more" and "harder" from the assassin. Itachi turned to face the window, uncomfortable now.

Naruto didn't seem to have noticed; instead he was glaring at the floor, arms and legs crossed. "I know, I was careful!"

Itachi sighed, "You must be even more so, now. Which is why I have taken the liberty to prepare you and Sasuke a private room where you can continue your lessons away from the army. We can reduce the chances of your little 'incident' from happening again."

"Your brothers a dick." The Uchiha rolled his eyes.

"Give him a chance Naruto, he is merely spoilt and arrogant." He smiled now, "I thought you enjoyed taking on people like that." No reply. "Naruto?" Itachi turned to face the bed and caught the blond, eyes closed and fast asleep. He smiled and ran a hand along the boy's cheek. Naruto and Gaara were always tired during the day what with having to run around the city at ungodly hours of the night. More often than not he caught one or the other, mostly Naruto, sleeping away in some part of the castle. It had made for some memorable moments, especially when he had found the red head curled up in a ball asleep, high up in one of the towers. He'd never seen Gaara sleep.

He ran his hands through the blond's hair and pressed his lips to Naruto's forehead. "Sleep well Naruto. I have a task for you tonight." He wanted nothing more than to curl up next to Naruto and sleep but he had things to do and an annoying brother to talk to so with one last look at Naruto, so peaceful in his sleep the Uchiha stepped out into the corridor and closed the door behind him.

"Alright, so this should be the place." Naruto murmured to himself. He landed as silent as a flea on an old depilated building. Wooden planks were nailed over every window and the some parts of the building looked like it would collapse at any moment. I swear I'll fall into one of these holes one day. He scaled the side of the building until he came to a boarded up window. He looked around to make sure he was completely alone then he tapped out an intricate pattern and soon a little hole opened up under the window. Naruto shimmied through and came up on the other side. Two huge men stood in front of him. He knew the drill. He removed every hidden blade, every weapon, anything dangerous in other words and put them on the table. One man patted him down, nodded the okay and he was off.

The intricate network of tunnels under the old building had always left Naruto disoriented and he loathed being underground, it made him feel trapped, plus with no weapons on his person he felt utterly naked. Sure he'd be able to fight off anyone that would try to hurt him but his blades had always been a soothing comfort to him and he treasured each one. Without them he got fidgety and nervous and he hated it.

Naruto navigated his way through the tunnels. He felt sorry for any poor sucker that happened to find his way down here. He could also never understand why they would need a pair of guards when a person could just as easily get lost and starve down here. It had taken him a good year to even figure his way through a mere quarter of this network which was why he respected Jiraiya so much for knowing the system perfectly. Also, the guy was pretty funny too.

Naruto arrived at his destination and slid into a dark hole cleverly concealed behind a large stone boulder. A couple of steps and he came to a wooden door, he knocked. The door opened at once to reveal a slightly dishevelled, slightly drunk Jiraiya.

"Naruto, my boy!" The silver haired man slapped Naruto across the back and he had to grab the door frame to stop himself from being slammed into the concrete. For an old man, he sure had one hell of slap. Hurt like a bitch too.

"I'm here for the scrolls Itachi requested, Jiraiya."

Jiraiya pouted. "Why not have a drink with me Naruto, you're always running off doing this and that for Itachi!"

"I'm worki-"

"Nonsense!" He grabbed Naruto around the neck and hulled him into the room.

Plush red carpet decorated the floors, pictures of huge breasted women adorned the walls and Jiraiya was pushing him down into one of the chairs in the room. The room was small but Naruto knew the door at the back lead off into a multitude of other rooms.

A goblet of wine was held in front of his face. Jiraiya grinned down at him. "One drink, kid. You look like you need it."

He shouldn't really be doing this. Get the scrolls. Get out. Report back and then…and then you got to deal with the Brat Prince tomorrow morning. Wine it is then. He took the goblet from Jiraiya's hands and downed it in one gulp. Not the best idea.

Jiraiya laughed at the coughing blond. "Still a kid aye. How you been Naruto? It's been a while since I seen you down here."

"I'm doing good, looking after Itachi's brother and all."

Jiraiya almost snorted up his glass of wine. "Hahaha, brat! You get stuck with the other brat?" He wiped at his face, tears in his eyes, still laughing. Bastard wasn't even trying to hide it.

"Yea, Itachi's orders."

Another laugh. "Another, boy?"

"Yes."

Naruto didn't know how long he'd stayed with Jiraiya and drank but as the wine warmed his system he stopped caring, stopped caring about the brat prince, Itachi, what he was, everything. Nothing mattered. It was just him and the warm euphoria coursing through his brain. Ever so slowly, his eyes shut closed. The goblet fell from his hands to rest in a pool of spilt wine.

Jiraiya watched Naruto sleep, his breathing even and gentle. He picked up the fallen wine and thanked every deity that his carpets were red, Tsunade wouldn't have been very happy to find wine on her carpets, at least it wasn't too noticeable. Jiraiya put the goblets on a low wooden table and pulled a blanket out from a wooden chest. He draped it over Naruto's still form and sat down next to the boy.

"Itachi, you're going to kill this boy."

Naruto was just a kid, albeit, bratty loud-mouthed and annoying as hell but he was still just a kid. He shouldn't be killing off crooks, thieves and other scum of society. He should do what kids do, whatever the hell that was Jiriya had no idea.

"You called Master?" Jiraiya didn't look up rfom Naruto's sleeping face.

"Yes, take those scrolls. "he pointed to three scrolls bound in orange string, "to Uchiha Itachi."

The man nodded, "yes, Master." He prepared to depart before Jiraiya stopped him.

"Wait." The man bowed.

"Tell Itachi that Naruto is with me, god knows how angry the guy gets if he doesn't have Naruto under lock, key and steel chains."

"I understand Master."

Jiraiya shooed the man away with a wave of his hand. "Go now, quickly."

He was getting far too old for this. Naruto, you better get out while you still can but even Jiraiya knew that Naruto had already woven himself in too deep.

"You and Gaara. You better stay safe."

Naruto knew he shouldn't have drunk. He knew!

"Are you ready?" Too fucking loud.

The brat prince was leaning against a pillar, sword in hand and Naruto could've sworn if he didn't have a massive hangover right now that the prince was smirking. Evilly. Bastard knew.

Itachi had already given him enough lectures this morning when he'd appeared in Itachi's room red eyed, tired and cringing at every loud noise. Itachi hadn't been pleased, or happy, not even a little bit. Well Naruto had kind of passed out when he was supposed to have been on a job but what could he say it was Jiraiya 's fault! The old man had kept pushing glass after glass onto Naruto and he just couldn't refuse. The Uchiha had gotten his scrolls so he shouldn't have been complaining. Still that didn't stop him from talking Naruto's ears off about disregarding orders blahblahblah. He just wanted to crawl back into a hole and die.

"I said are you ready?" Sasuke slapped the blade down onto the tiled floor. A sharp ring echoed throughout the large room making Naruto wince in pain. His poor, poor brain. Never again Jiraiya.

The blond haired assassin reached down and picked up the blade. He looked at Satan's spawn smirking down at him and predicted that this would not be enjoyable at all. Not one bit.

He was absolutely right.